withered old crone 🥀🇵🇸
@FlatEartherKitt
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i'm copping everything, i'm done with browsing. one blood mega rmx & danny devito fan account. anti-imperialist anti-zionist fuck 12. chaotic. alt: @NicholeGunz
atlanta / chicago
Joined March 2010
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Pinned Tweet
me entering your dms: i’d like to take a spinnyspin on that dickeroo sometime lol
*after 20 minutes with no response* this is her roommate, she is in the hospital on life support
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i opened a savings account in 2008 with a $25 deposit. i've watched the money grow over the last decade, and though i've been tempted, i've left it alone. now i have $27.96, enough to retire on. take note.
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lifting up his legs to unsnap him >>>
Imagine going home from the club with a Nigga wearing a onesie lmao
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secret service guy: hey wyd with this large gun on the roof near a former president
assassin: dw about it kitten
secret service guy: okay ♥️ yay ♥️
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obama be like “someone should’ve done something about this” every single day.
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unfortunately he is insanely personable lmao
Donald Trump just walked into a Chick-fil-A in Atlanta and ordered 30 milkshakes for customers.
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white women who think drinking wine is a personality trait love the quote “well behaved women seldom make history.”
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humiliating personal essay week is on fire
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meal prep is so trash lmao. you just be eating that 2-day old brown rice wishing you had never been born.
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hamas wouldn’t let that lady get her monthly lip fillers and y’all are making jokes??
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what if a make-a-wish child’s dying wish was to order $100 worth of mcdonald’s on doordash and not tip
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it’s been almost 2 weeks and i’m still not mentally past this
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i ordered a caesar salad from this expensive detroit pizza place and got this lol
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to pass, weary traveler, you must answer us these riddles three
Quavo, Kid Cudi, and Offset attend Louis Vuitton’s Spring/Summer 2022 fashion show.
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@latkedelrey
she literally jumped and screeched like a tom & jerry cartoon, my stomach hurt from laughing earlier
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he got all these black women giggling i’m screaming!!!
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this fucking BEAT. drop the youtube tutorial sis.
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barack, to no one in particular: as president, i often killed men for sport.
michelle, nodding thoughtfully: he did. it was very challenging for us.
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losing it at this mckinsey lady’s company’s “product,” which is a bespoke to-do list app that costs $600/month
Hi, I’m Lindsey. A bit about me:
- Ohio mother of 4
- I employ a team of 15 as a start-up founder & CEO of Strongsuit
- drive a used Honda Odessey
- husband works in manufacturing
- The financial future of my company, team and family are at risk w/ the collapse of SVB (1/23)
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“y’all mad because nick cannon said [summary that omits the actual fucked up stuff he said]??”
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“my stupid moron cishet male ex was so dumb he didn’t know how to boil water. i was way too clever for him. we dated for six years.”
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i just thought it was a humorous video, sorry for retroactively making him become president
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cannot believe a small community nonprofit with zero full-time employees that usually handles $1,000/day and is required by IRS rules to only operate in accordance with its specific stated purpose didn’t spend $35M in two weeks.
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i went a lil wacky for a few years and didn't open mail and pay some bills. just scanned a stack of like 100 medical bills that went to collections and tbh i kinda snapped by going insane and just ignoring them. they went away and aren't on my credit and i saved thousands. 🥰
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hate when my man, completely out of nowhere and with no warning signs, goes on fox news
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this made my stomach hurt lmfao lord carry him now
I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone more down bad in my life
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jenny mccarthy is deadass responsible for a global health epidemic. she should be sent into space.
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that woman who pretended she could only walk backwards after getting a flu vaccine is still one of my favorite moments in history.
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palestinians are the bravest people on earth
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laughing so hard at this. genuinely wonder what he thinks those idioms mean.
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@JayRRogers
@soIodown
the entire restaurant when somebody singing loud as hell about emotional abuse
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listening to your date poop to ascertain whether solid or liquid
ghosted by a man after he had diarrhea in my apartment 🤡
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please remove the disabled nephew from your home so my kids can get treats out the candy drawer
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i want to seize the means of production but i’m dummy thicc so the clap of my ass cheeks keeps alerting the bourgeoise
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this is literal nazi shit. absolutely horrifying. i cannot imagine the pain these women endured.
Whistleblower: There Were Mass Hysterectomies at ICE Facility | Law & Crime
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i want what y’all got 😩
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my aunt put on the godfather part II on full volume, spent like 20 minutes fast forwarding, muttering "i've seen this part" over and over, then got to the part she hadn't seen i guess, then promptly fell asleep, i'm in awe
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every single take is steaming hot, i love him
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dave chappelle helped kill an affordable housing component of a new development, i feel like i’m losing my mind lol
@NicholeGunz
why would a small ohio town need affordable housing when it can have a firehouse subs knockoff and a comedy club that only books CPAC guys
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this is SO me. asthmatic, addicted to heroin, desperate for the hulk to like my pics.
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"i fucking love my blackness. and yours my nigga."
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response (the columnist was clearly disgusted too):
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off half a xan and now i’m reciting one of hitler’s speeches, i don’t even speak german normally
Louisiana Judge Michelle Odinet responds to video she & her family repeatedly say the word “Nigger”
“I was given a sedative at the time of the video. I have zero recollection of the video & the disturbing language used during it.”
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this is literally meaningless and there’s a typo lmfao
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@bamsekingen
@Timcast
i’m a nurse and my only job is to take all the bullet ridden babies to the dumpster
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@banalplay
@lander
as he should be! joe biden is literally a neurodivergent minor and you want him to “just do something”?
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@Shomicita
thank you for bravely sharing your story. my husband doesn’t even know i peel my face off every month because i’m ashamed. 😔 maybe the stigma will end today.
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obama goes on a different talk show and issues a new press release every day to tell us actually only neoliberalism is good. it’s pathetic.
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⚠️❗️UH OH ❗️⚠️ PRESIDENT 😩🫡 BIDEN HAS CUM 💦👀 DOWN ⬇️🕺WITH HOE-VID 🦠🤧! HE DIDN'T 🚫🙂↕️ USE 🙅🏻♀️ PROTECTION 😏🍆 FROM THE HEFTY 💪🏼🫦VIRAL LOAD 🥵 😷 AND HAS TO 👨🏻⚕️🔫 BE IN WHORE-ENTINE 💅🏼❌ UNTIL HE'S 🚫 NO LONGER 🧪🤪 CUNTAGEOUS 🤒👨🏻❤️💋👨🏻
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for people who asked for a link, i’m using 1 of my 10 monthly shares to spread chaos
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@marcellas_23
a small child doing something silly around you is apparently grounds for continued genocide ☝🏽
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i can't stop laughing at this. it's so absurd.
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when he’s not looking shiesty he looks like he’s carrying a tiny bumblebee in his mouth to keep it safe
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@w_i_l_l_a
they loooove trying to show us how normal and blue collar they are. i loved the mention of driving a used car too. how impressive, you must be living below the poverty line!
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Because, like the Bible says, sometimes shit be wild fucked up, but it don't always be fucked up.
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if you’re in poly relationships, try not to be involved in a murder because dateline gonna be talking real crazy about you
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reporters are so funny. "sadly a man was just knocked off his feet" (passive). "officer now helping him up" (active). FUNNY.
Salt Lake City cops shove down an elderly man with a cane for the crime of standing along the street:
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@thesarahkelly
my law school loans been over $200k since i graduated 8 years ago lol. i pay between $1-2k every month. principal hasn't been touched. love it.
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the north is tired of bending the knee and will not bend the knee anymore...even to a stark... instead they will bend the knee to... a stark.
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@RobbyRav
all that conspiracy shit about jews controlling the world and everyone is choosing to focus on the “white people are not good” dialogue lol
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all due respect if you’re like 35 still talking about how they told you you “talked white” etc. maybe just give up
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i really hope non-romantic unions like this become more common and are given the benefits of marriage one day.
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@LeemerBean
@Ccampbellbased
[following 2 minors around lowes to sneak a pic] they’re so weird and i’m normal
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SO CLAIRE PENIS POSTED A VIDEO CREATED BY JOCAT AND PEOPLE GOT MAD AT HER STEALING HIS WORK THEN WHEN THEY REALIZED SHE WAS LAUGHING AT IT THEY GOT MAD AT HER RIDICULING SOMETHING “WHOLESOME” WHICH WAS HIM RHYMING ABOUT HOW HE LIKES NICE GIRLS & CAT GIRLS & SHORT GIRLS & FAT GI—
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what is this lol, is this true crime podcast culture or what
Imagine spending $2k to go on a cruise and having to lock up your room like you’re in the Last of Us
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@JuliusIrvington
taco bell: for a limited time only, a taco inside a burrito inside a chalupa
me: intriguing
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damn but the nappy headed hoes still alive 🥰
BREAKING: Veteran radio broadcaster and known racist Don Imus has died at the age of 79.
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"i already addressed that" is taking me out lmaoo
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