Fake Governor Cox
@FakeGovernorCox
Followers
2,824
Following
167
Media
815
Statuses
2,405
Fake Utah Governor. Parody account. I am a fair-weather politician in tumultuous times. I have a smile, not a spine.
Utah, USA
Joined November 2020
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I know the
#OmicronVarient
is on everyone’s mind, but I want to reassure you that we state leaders are watching developments closely and are committed to do absolutely nothing about it.
#utpol
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By the way, gambling is illegal in Utah. Except when it comes to Covid and our health — then it’s highly encouraged.
#utpol
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Frustrated that you’re not being represented in politics? Have you tried lavender? I have connections to people that can give you an amazing deal on essential oils. They may even have a no-bid contract with the state. Anyway, use promo code “Gerrymander” for 0% discount.
#utpol
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Hey friends, I know just about everything is closing down: concerts, restaurants, theaters, schools, and emergency rooms to name a few. We state leaders are keeping tabs on the situation and baffled why more of you aren’t happy with this freedom we’ve preserved for you.
#utpol
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Congratulations to everyone graduating from college this spring. It's a great time to be launching into the world. Utah has the hottest economy in the nation right now and you should have no trouble finding the 2 or 3 jobs needed to pay the rent to live here.
#utpol
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I’m happy to see
@RepJohnCurtis
has found delight in something he voted against.
#utpol
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Just got off the phone with
@JStuartAdams
. He’s happy to report his sense of taste has returned, but still no sense of decency for anyone else’s health.
#utpol
#utleg
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My statement regarding using
#ArlingtonNationalCemetery
for campaign purposes.
"I did not think associating with a felon might cause me to break the law. I apologize for the oversight and desecration of that sacred space."
#utpol
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I receive weekly updates on our drought water situation. Last week I asked our intern to look into how well our prayers for moisture are going. The data is interesting. Follow this 🧵 to know who's been praying and who's not.
#utpol
1/5
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Not sure why Salt Lake County would be upset with the legislature’s soon to be confirmed district maps. Instead of ONE congressman to represent their interests, soon they’ll have FOUR that will ignore theirs.
#utpol
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I’m seeing reports that in other states Republicans are filling lawsuits to suppress voters in heavily Democratic stronghold districts. Fortunately, in Utah, we do things The Utah Way. We use gerrymandering to prevent Democrats from ever having strongholds.
#utpol
#utahelections
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I'm hear Democrats are registering as Republicans again. This is unfair to Republicans. If you want to have influence in Utah politics, the right way is win a majority in the
#utleg
and then redraw district maps to assure only your party has influence.
#utpol
#TheUtahWay
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President Russell M. Nelson has asked each of us to forgive one person by Easter. After much consideration, I have decided Tucker Carlson will not be that person.
#utpol
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497
We were going to do a contact trace for
@DeidreHenderson
to find out where she may have contacted Covid but there were too many legislators to call and they don't care anyway.
#utpol
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466
Sources tell me
@SenMikeLee
is very sad that
@HerschelWalker
has lost his Georgia Senate race, but is determined to find another issue to use to grift donations from unsuspecting Utahns.
#utpol
#GeorgiaRunoff
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I don't plan on responding to a recent FoxNews talking head tirade – mostly because there's a word that rhymes with Tucker that I'd like to use, but it is beneath the dignity of my office and not on Abbey's approved list of farm words.
#utpol
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Hey friends, tonight at 6:30 is my State of the State address. I'm super excited to share with you all the things
@JStuartAdams
and
@BradWilsonGOP
approved for me to say. 😊
#utpol
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Just a friendly remember that you have until April 30 to submit a really cool design for our new state flag before the legislature picks the one they designed themselves without any public input.
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Hey friends. We accidentally added a zero to the number of orange barrels ordered for summer construction season. Without a place to keep them, we placed them throughout the state at random intersections. I hope you appreciate our efforts to not waste state resources.
#utpol
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Glad to see the legislature has released their proposed gerrymandered redistricting maps. As a reminder, if you don’t like it you can pass another ballot initiative that the legislature will amend to be meaningless. It’s The Utah Way
#utpol
.
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How embarrassing. My earlier statement was released with a typo. See the attached statement with the correction.
#utpol
Gov. Spencer Cox, Lt. Gov. Deidre Henderson denounce behavior of Utah School Board Member Natalie Cline. Read the full statement here ⬇️
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The results are in: gerrymandering wins, I mean, all four of our congressmen win their campaigns easily.
#utpol
#utahelections
All four of Utah’s Republican U.S. House representatives are heading back to Washington for two more years.
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Hey all. Please stop sending me the video of Republican
@MayorGiles
at the
@KamalaHarris
event in AZ. I know what you’re trying to say… “look a Republican with integrity and a spine.” I’ve never had a spine and I no longer have integrity. But thanks for thinking of me.
#utpol
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Hey friends, just a quick reminder that you have a few more days to give feedback on these proposed state flags before the Utah legislature ignores your opinions and chooses a flag they designed themselves.
#utpol
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If you don’t like the proposed district maps the legislature has proposed, please reach out to your representative who was gerrymandered into your district 10 years ago to be your representative. They will listen to you if you are a Republican constituent.
#utpol
#theUtahWay
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🤔 What’s the over and under on our constitutional scholar
@SenMikeLee
coming up with an excuse that the senate cannot possibly confirm a replacement for Justice Breyer?
#utpol
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Wow.
@SenMikeLee
sent me an email asking my opinion on a potential book title:
"It's not a Democracy: How to install an authoritarian leader the Constitutional way!"
Or:
"Mounting an insurrection how the founding fathers envisioned"
🤔🤔
#utpol
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There’s a lot of competing ideas on how to clean up our air before the Olympics. After much deliberation, our plan is to ask Utahns to pray for wind.
Part of Utah's agreement with IOC requires clean air for the Olympic Games in 2034.
See the plans:
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Hey friends, I know it's basically an exposure party out there. If you have *any* cold or flu symptoms, please assume you have Covid, stay home, rest and enjoy a book that
@canyonsdistrict
moms haven't tried to ban. We'll get through this.
#utpol
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I've declared September 1 as a "Day of Prayer, Fasting and Contemplation" for our nation. I hope you will join me in prayer this Sunday, and then again in November to vote for the candidate who attempted an insurrection and called for the termination of the Constitution.
#utpol
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Today’s Covid numbers should be a reminder to get the vaccine, the booster, to wear a mask and social distance. We have very few ICU beds and even fewer politicians who care.
#utpol
#OmicronVirus
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I’d like to thank a large percent of Utahns who have been abstaining from Russian vodka long before it became a stand in solidarity for Ukraine.
#utpol
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Wearing a mask was such a burden. First you had to loop it around one ear and then loop it around the OTHER ear. And then make sure it was *over* your nose. That was the hard part for a lot of people. So much burden for so little benefit.
#utpol
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Just got off the phone with
@SenMikeLee
. He tells me Mike Lee is feeling good about the debate tonight and predicts Mike Lee will be the winner.
#utpol
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You may have heard news that Utah is looking at piping water from the Pacific Ocean through California and Nevada to restore The Great Salt Lake. That may sound drastic, but now that the pandemic is over, the state needs to find new ways to award contracts to our friends.
#utpol
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I lament our culture is so divided that one cannot violate federal law, dishonor the graves of fallen soldiers for a campaign photo-op, and associate with a felon without it being politicized.
#utpol
#DisagreeBetter
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Looking for the appropriate location for a photo shoot with a big “mission accomplished” banner in the back. Lemme know if you have recommendations.
#utpol
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250
Anyone know what the symptoms are for brain eating worms? Not asking for any particular reason. Just… curious.
#utpol
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As you celebrate The Fourth of July, I hope you'll reflect on the blessings of not living under an oppressive government that controls your personal liberties. And I hope the women of Utah find another reason to feel blessed.
#utpol
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😬😬😬 Just saw the Covid numbers that will be released today. We need another bill to end the pandemic ASAP!!!
#utpol
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Obviously there’s work to be done to improve this ranking. I, for one, will endeavor to do a better job explaining to our wonderful Utah women how great our economy is.
#utpol
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Hey friends, if you see a kid on the corner selling lemonade or cookies, please support them. You never know if they’re a future entrepreneur or have a mom that makes them pay for their own school lunches. Thx
#utpol
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This is why I appreciate
@SenMikeLee
. Despite being in the Senate as long as he has, he approaches each day as if it’s his first.
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I was surprised to see
@JStuartAdams
masked up for my State of the State address. Just goes to prove that he, and other state legislators, will do the right thing if enough public attention is directed to their normal behavior.
#utpol
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Congratulations are also in order for
@RepBurgessOwens
for his primary win last night. He will continue to represent Utah’s CD4 and his constituent’s interests on FoxNews and occasionally in Congress.
#utpol
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I’m subbing in a 3rd grade classroom today. I cannot wait to tell the kids how awesome our economy is right now.
#utpol
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My statement on the results of Natalie Cline's reelection bid: "I appreciate SLCO GOP delegates for having the moral courage to do what the Utah Legislature could not."
#utpol
#BREAKING
: Natalie Cline has lost in her reelection bid.
@DrABBollinger
has unseated Cline at the SLCO GOP convention.
@KSL5TV
#utpol
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Like Romney, I am not endorsing anyone in the Utah senate race. As governor, it would be improper for me to unduly influence the election between a partisan boot licking homophobic faux constitutional scholar and his opponent
@EvanMcMullin
.
#utpol
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It’s official. The first
#OmicronVarient
has been detected in Utah. Let’s not freak out. We know what to do. Liberals: go extreme mask. And Conservatives: go make references about masks being worse than the Holocaust. 3, 2, 1… go!!
#utpol
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Please join me today in prayer, fasting, and contemplation for our nation and our Constitution. And join me in November to vote for the guy who tried to overturn the results of a free and fair election and cheered on an attack on our nation's capital.
#utpol
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By now everyone has heard there are two cases of MonkeyPox in Utah. No one wants another outbreak of an uncontrolled virus in our state, but rest assured we state leaders are now seasoned pros and we're ready to once again not care should the occasion arise.
#utpol
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I'm so worried about our democracy that I support
@SenMikeLee
, a fake elector scheme supporter,
@RepChrisStewart
and
@RepBurgessOwens
who contested the vote of millions of voters; supported SL County gerrymandering that deprives them of representation that reflects their views.
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I am grateful to get the endorsement from one of the least liked or effective US senators. Thank you,
@SenMikeLee
, for taking a few moments away from your Twitter content creation job to give me your support.
#utpol
I will be voting for Spencer Cox in the general election. Primary elections are where Republicans vigorously debate policy differences. The Primary is over. We cannot risk Utah turning into California. We must defeat the Democrats by uniting behind our fellow Republicans.
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I know
@sltrib
is frustrated that I didn’t respond to interview requests before they reported on the security expenses at my Fairview home. For the record, we tried, but my schedule didn’t align with the
@Deseret
reporter.
#SchottHappens
#utpol
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My statement on the start of this year’s legislative session.
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I’m told
@phil_lyman
is going to launch a write-in campaign. Write-in campaigns are difficult to win – more so when the office of “Govenor” isn’t even on the ballot.
#utpol
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I'm in a pensive mood at the close of my first year as governor, so I penned this recollection of my best efforts this year. It's called "I am not a bomb-thrower".
#utpol
1/6
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For the record, I don’t control WiFi in the state of Utah. The weather, yes. WiFi, no.
#utpol
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Tonight, I called out the
@sltrib
for using my exact words in their article. It’s unfair because my wording could be construed as me having a spine – that I might stand up for something I believe in. Shame on the Tribune for making me out to be someone I’m not.
Unbelievable. This is not what I said at all. And the Tribune knows it but somehow left this up anyway. What a joke.
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Please stop sending me this clip of Obama urging
#DisagreeBetter
. Yes, I know the Democratic Party is TRYING to unite and aspire Americans to end the vitriol and division. I just think the narcissistic racist felon is the one that can actually DO unity.
#utpol
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169
Another reminder: tomorrow is the last day for Democrats and Independents to change your party affiliation to Republican so you can split the anti-
@SenMikeLee
vote in the GOP primary and advance him to the general election.
#utpol
6
28
168
I believe there are many issues both political parties can agree on and if we each give a little, we can solve 90% of our problems. That's why I endorse
@SenMikeLee
, who has a record of working with (check notes) Rand Paul... sometimes... and well, Rand Paul.
#utpol
8
8
164
Hey friends, my earlier tweet did not conform to the anti-DEI bill I championed and signed into law two days ago. Attached is the corrected tweet.
#utpol
#BlackHistoryMonth
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We Republicans are committed to do whatever we can to stop the type of mass shootings in our communities like we witnessed in Uvalde, TX. Except regulate the one thing that is causing mass shootings like we witnessed in Uvalde, TX.
#utpol
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Q. Will I veto these maps?
A. Nope.
@JStuartAdams
and
@BradWilsonGOP
say I cannot. The legislature worked really hard on these gerrymandered maps and it would be unfair to them (and me).
#utpol
#RedistrictUtah
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Every day I see Utahns anxious about disturbing things in the news. Like a former president's house being searched, deadly heat waves, or Mike Lee in the senate. I want to remind you all to stop, check the air quality index, and if safe, take a deep breath.
#utpol
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Today I met with President Zelenskyy and expressed my support for his country. I also expressed hope that Trump, who is aligned with Putin, wins in November.
#utpol
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I finally get to use an emoji in an official proclamation.
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Tonight, I signed into law HB57 allowing Utah not to comply with federal directives we don’t like. I want to warn Utah cities and counties not to pass something similar. We will sue you and you will lose. Just like we will lose when we are sued by the Federal Government.
#utpol
Lawmakers have passed Utah Constitutional Sovereignty Act. The bill sponsor says it will “flip” the current process where Utah might sue the federal government over a federal directive, but still have to comply with it while the process plays out in court
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Wow. My fortune cookie reads, “
@NatalieJCline
won’t resign voluntarily.”
Weirder yet, the lottery numbers on the back are: 8 0 15 38 75 00 - which is also the phone # of the Utah State Board of Education one could call to tell them how much disapprove of Cline. Bizarre, right??
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Oof.
@JStuartAdams
and
@mschultz_12
are super mad. They’re furious that today’s court ruling will allow citizens to use big money and special interest groups to advance initiatives like clean air, better education, and dare I say it… making politicians’ calendars public.
#utpol
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There is no national emergency that cannot be solved by rolling up one’s sleeves and tweeting blame at the Democrat in the White House.
#utpol
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Yesterday’s policy meeting was very productive. We’re going to continue to make sure the government doesn’t address our citizen’s concerns and blame Joe Biden for not fixing it.
#utpol
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I’m really grateful for the snow we’ve received this week. The bitter cold though… that’s Joe Biden’s fault.
#utpol
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This is embarrassing. My earlier tweet had a typo. I'm attaching the correction.
We’re frustrated with the standoff in Washington, where Congress is unwilling to fulfill their most basic obligation of funding the government. But Utah will do everything it can to ensure the health and well-being of families and protect the state’s economy and access to public
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You all need to do a better job at
#DisagreeBetter
when I sign into law legislation that targets and marginalizes Utah minorities for political gain.
#utpol
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143
I support
@SenMikeLee
's efforts to add content warnings on children's shows that feature gay characters. If we allow kids to learn how to be accepting and open-minded of those different than themselves, they might grow up to become liberals.
#utpol
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