Stacey H.
@CurvesAndNerves
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Following
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Copywriter. Potty mouth. Horse girl. Mom. More words than a Midwestern goodbye.
NC. NOLA. CHI.
Joined May 2009
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Pinned Tweet
Why yes I DID sit in my car for 8 minutes longer than I needed to because “Return of the Mack” was playing on the radio.
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Dear Chicago,
I’m gonna kiss you on the dang mouth. Figuratively. 🥰
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Hi. I made this really cute tiny human. He showed up last night and I can’t stop staring at him because he’s perfect and I love him so much that I would literally flip a bus for him. 🥰🤱🏻
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The ENTIRE Napoleon neutral ground is tents and tarps and three rows deep of adults on ladders and I hate it.
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Dear patrons of Mothers' Day Brunches, Be nice to your servers/bartenders, for they are unable to see their moms so that you may see yours.
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@pollen196
Oh man, I used to work at Medieval Times and people would propose during the Knighting Ceremony all the time. Once a lady accepted the proposal and then hid in the bathroom for an hour and then snuck out of the castle.
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Working out of a coffee shop that only hires adults with disabilities and holy hell, it's the most cheerful place in the world.
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This sign is more aspirational than anything, but it was real goddamn effective at parades today.
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My son woke up screaming and inconsolable at 4:30. He sobbed and wailed until almost 5, at which point he farted loudly and immediately stopped crying. I have never related more to my child.
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This is one of the most authentic New Orleans pictures I’ve ever seen.
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@FintechNeural
Do you actually live in the city proper or are you out in Elgin? There's no more crime in Chicago than in any other city. And *less* crime than there is in Rockford if you're looking at actual stats.
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Real talk, I don't live in Chicago anymore, but HOLY HELL THAT HUFFPO GUY IS BRINGING EVERYONE WHO EVER LIVED THERE TOGETHER. Amazing.
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Cut my hair today and will be taking and posting selfies until further notice due to feelin’ myself.
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Took myself out to dinner tonight and let my husband handle the baby’s dinner and bathtime and bedtime. Happy goddamn new year to me. ❤️
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WHO HAS TWO THUMBS, SPEAKS LIMITED FRENCH, AND JUST GOT A RAISE AND A PROMOTION???
THIS MOI.
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Tell me where you were born only using a GIF.
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WHO HAS TWO THUMBS AND GOT A RANDOM RAISE TODAY?
THIS GIRL. 🏆🏆🏆
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Dear
#NolaTwitter
,
Do you ride in a krewe that isn’t one million dollars? Are there openings on your float? Do you love your float-mates?
…can I be on your float? 😘❤️
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My husband got a call last night and this morning got on a plane to help with the
@WCKitchen
relief effort for those impacted by Tennessee tornados and I am just stupid proud of him.
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Walked past a jazz trio on Magazine playing “Blueberry Hill” and got teary. I am gonna be a wreck when we leave this place.
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Q: What do we want?
A: COFFEE!
Q: When do we want it?
A: I'LL FUCKING CUT YOU.
#coffee
#illcutyou
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Drunk husband bought a laptop as a present for Sober husband and we’re all finding out about it together right now.
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Guys.
I am accepting a PAID JOB/INTERNSHIP THING today.
(It doesn’t start for a few weeks but YAY.)💰💰💰💰
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Friends, we are moving to Raleigh, NC after Mardi Gras. Please tell me everything you know about that city (or the rest of the Triangle).
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Can confirm that
@tchoupa_style
is as much of a delight IRL as she is online but y’all already knew that. 🥰
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@ScottWalker
@TheDemocrats
Or a poor waitress who hates small minded bigots who hate teachers/middle class/women/minorities/etc. Same same, though, right?
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Took the baby to his first real restaurant tonight and he ate grilled cheese and fries and okra and was SUCH A GREAT LITTLE TROOPER I AM SO PROUD. 🥰🥰🥰
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@JenniJo83093170
@NiamhHA17
@GHardstark
My Polish father would say "prootz" and for YEARS I thought that was different than a fart.
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Apparently, Wilmington, NC is the only place where carnivorous plants like Flytraps are found naturally in the wild.
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Whether you agreed with their politics or not, the Carters were and have always been good and *decent* people. Almost feeling like I’m bracing for Jimmy to pass in the next few days.
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I would like to announce that I can still fit into my “wedding jeans” from my legal wedding almost 5 years ago.
(Yes, that’s a man dressed as Elvis. NOLA folks know what’s up.)
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Good morning, New Orleans.
PS: Where’s a good pescatarian-friendly spot for a semi-nice dinner where two sets of parents can tie one on and not spend $$$?
PPS: Bonus points for Uptown.
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My parents are arriving today to see their grandson for his EIGHT MONTH BIRTHDAY. They drove all the way down from Chicago and I am gonna hand them a baby and not look back.
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Put on a whole face to do fuckall at my Mother in Law’s house.
Happy New Year, y’all.
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LOTTA folks headed away from the parade route. Creole Creamery is fucking PACKED
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I don’t get dressed up very often. But when I do, I think I’m pretty good at it. 💁🏻♀️
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Today my kid told me that he likes New Orleans the best.
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My dad built my kid a fort out of couch cushions and you can just tell that he’s been waiting FOREVER to do this. 🥰
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If I agree to meet you in the French Quarter, it means I like you a lot as a human.
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This day is dumb and not even this cute ass dress is fixing it.
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Oh my god; newborns are exhausting. Also, the sky is blue and it rains a lot in New Orleans.
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I would like to apologize to everyone in Louisiana - my mother in law went to
@RousesMarkets
to buy us new baby groceries and grabbed one of those little out of season king cakes and ate some because she didn’t know any better.
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I started labor at 900 last night. It is now 1230 in the afternoon and this kid is in NO RUSH. ☹️
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I am going to buy all the stupid sequin shit from H&M because I do not have impulse control and also Mardi Gras is coming.
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You guys, it’s 80 goddamn degrees in New Orleans. Gonna lean into this nonsense.
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@hyenalionking
Mmmm no. That’s not how it works. This city is not the cesspool that the media paints it to be.
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I love living in New Orleans and being a part of it all but damn is it disheartening to CONSTANTLY be told I’ll never belong because I’m not a native.
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@kthalps
Did you know that a true New Orleans accent sounds like a NYC accent and not like some kind of Deep South shit where everyone drops the R?
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I am THISCLOSE to replacing my whole wardrobe with minor league baseball logo tees.
@discoturkeys
@trashpandas
@RumblePoniesBB
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Never in my wildest dreams did I think a grocery store would be my favorite local Twitter account but here we are.
Keep doing everything you're doing,
@BreauxMart
Smack dab in the middle of this 2020 panic sandwich, is hurricane season. Yeah, that’s right, MORE S*** TO WORRY ABOUT.
Here are some grocery making “tips”
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I’m putting “smut author” on my resume.
And THANK YOU! 🥰🥰🥰
Happiest of birthdays to our resident author of smut and just a wonderful human,
@CurvesAndNerves
!
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15 hours in a car from Chicago to Nola with a three year old. I would like a beer plugged directly into my veins.
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To quote
@StaceyJSpiehler
:
“May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and seeking help is the most badass thing a person can do.”
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Welp. I'm in Raleigh now. We're in the middle of fucking nowhere, but our house is super nice.
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Being a stay at home mom is lonely as fuck, you guys.
To say I am grateful for Twitter is an understatement.
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Okay New Orleans. Apparently we all need to apply for jobs now in order to get our measly $200/week. So who ISN'T hiring? Because this bitch is about to have a baby and cannot waste her time with figuring this shit out AND having a newborn AND potentially not having income.
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My first job was at Medieval Times. It was awesome.
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@eveewing
This is Ruby - cattle dog/corgi mix rescued from Southern Illinois. Enjoys naps and running really fast and people food. Dislikes Christmas decor.
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Guys. Today I turned 36 and my husband and my neighbors planned a Chicago bday celebration with Chicago Dogs and Italian Beef and a backyard movie and I am very full and thrilled and psyched about everything right now. 🎂🌭
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Happy 3 year anniversary (part 1/3)🥰❤️
(Doesn’t everyone get married by an Elvi on their front porch on Lundi Gras?)
(I will repost this on Monday and it will still be accurate.)
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Potentially unpopular opinion:
Cold shoulder tops and bell sleeves are the fucking worst.
Doubly so if they appear together.
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Literally, we were told to go to someone’s house at 5. We got there at 5:30. One of the hosts didn’t get out of bed until 7:15 and then was on his phone all night. I am equal parts insulted and furious and sad.
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Do you ever get the feeling like you're just spinning your wheels and every day is just the same as the one before it?
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Two years ago I had ZERO fanny packs. And NOW. I am fanny pack RICH.
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Guys. It's hotter in Chicago than it is in New Orleans right now. What is happening?
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@blgtylr
My sister told me about this show and I hate-watched it with my husband. He was SCREAMING at the TV the whole time, "PICK THE HOUSE. THE HOUSEEEE. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??"
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My son is the mascot for the feral week between Christmas and New Year’s.
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Pro Tip: Do not book a super early flight the day after daylight savings. It is a dumb dumb dumb idea.
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Hello. I’m almost 40 and I just downloaded an app that identifies birds by their call.
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My upstairs neighbors (who are also my landlords) have been drinking and are listening to Kanye circa 2010 and I can hear it through my ceiling and I am NOT MAD ABOUT IT BECAUSE “POWER” IS STILL A FUCKING BANGER.
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I liked too many facebook posts about Biden winning and then facebook told me I couldn't like anymore posts for a while.
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If I could find a way to split myself in two and be in Chicago and New Orleans at the same time, forever, I would do it.
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Okay guys, I got a lot of questions about working at
@MedievalTimes
so I figured I'd give a glimpse of what it was like, back in....2001-2003.
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@BrandonP504
Ugh. Bike thieves are a universal pain in the ass, unfortunately. Try a Chicago summer though. Might change your mind. :)
It’s like how New Orleans in March & April feels kind of perfect. Chicago is like that during the summer, it’s a different vibe entirely than winter.
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Holy shit. You guys are making me cry. (I don’t know if it’s hormones or gratitude or both. Probably both.)
We have our 20 week ultrasound on Monday and I’ll post pics if he’s cute. Or if he has an extra limb or something.
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