Ishmael Spooky Arc
@ComradeIshmael
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Resident TTRPG enjoyer Substack:
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Joined August 2017
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Pinned Tweet
Getting so tilted by D&D playtest material that the Twitter thread turned into a blog post.
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Instead of nightclubs I want a 24hr library with hot chocolate stations, a dessert bar, coffee machine, big comfy chairs and beanbags, blankets, dogs welcome, just people who want to spend the evening reading alone, together, peaceful, a cosy fire, plants, an indoor waterfall.
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Dungeons and Dragons is in this weird position where WotC wants new edition sales but no new edition drama. Every time they post a little video about a 5.5 change it's like "a sword and spear are different from one another in subtle and drastic ways".
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@FanShimano
Men will post stuff like this and then whine about the "male loneliness epidemic".
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@afrocosmist
Khamas painted a fake tunnel entrance onto the ground and my cousin dived in head first. My cousin's body crumpled like an accordion :(
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>looking for a setting
>ask the DM if their setting is early modern or medieval
>they don't understand
>pull out an illustrated diagram explaining what is early modern and what is a medieval
>they laugh "it's a medieval setting sir"
>join the campaign
>it's early modern
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@afrocosmist
The judge not beating the "this court is corrupt and biased against my client" charges by throwing the lawyer raising them to jail lol
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This post has left containment and now I'm being yelled at by thirty year olds who only read YA novels.
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D&D has not been set in a medieval setting for, like, 20 years.
this is a medievalist game, get that early modernist bullshit out of here. if I’m DM, I’m putting these rebellions down with a heavy hand. without mass communication and advances in political ideology, these upstarts would be crushed by the king’s evil advisors posthaste
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@timmydownawell
@SaeedDiCaprio
It lets you see when a post is being posted from a service. It was an anti-bot feature.
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@juicermv
@jollorancho
@OOHKAYEYE
I think you're really underestimating how difficult this is. To Catch a Predator, which worked directly with police, had a high failure rate. If Chris Hanson had beat the shit out of those guys, that failure rate would be even higher.
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I have read all eight mastery properties for Dungeons and Dragons 5.5E and they're all so basic I'm crying. They're really making TikToks bragging about this?
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@AdamBlumenau
I kinda hope so! I think it'd be boring if we could keep the Automatons and Terminids on the frontiers forever. It'd make sense that as the Automatons and Terminids get closer to Earth that they'll have an in-universe excuse for deploying new weapon systems.
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@thousaandson
To all the ZA/UM successors: you have the opportunity to create one of the funniest CRPGs of all time
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@LichenSprinklez
@Nimmo1492
@bad_takes
@Tafdolphin
People don't want to admit this but Fallout 76 was less broken at release than this.
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@jamesrbuk
You really woke up and said from the left ear to the right ear your head will be empty
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Sanderson should have to disclose how much of people's donations will be going to bankrolling one of the largest anti-trans organizations on Earth.
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@jpodhoretz
What's striking about this tweet is that people hire you for your writing "ability".
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I'm sorry, but Roderick Day accusing every Black person yelling him of suffering from Afropessisim and "Maoism and various forms of Red Anarchism" because Abbot Elementary refuses to have an episode about a school shooting is too funny.
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@thegman987
@RaxKingIsDead
They passed an infrastructure bill the seventh the size of the military budget (which they've continuously raised throughout the year) and are always in perpetual try mode since the doing part would mean they can't run on the same issues they've failed to addressed for a decade
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🍾TONIGHT! A new Dirty Laundry launches on Dropout at 7PM ET / 4PM PT
Featuring host
@LilyD
, bartender
@GrantOB
, and Smosh cast:
🥂
@anggiarratana
🍸
@Chanse_McCrary
🍹
@arashalalani
🥃
@NoahGrossman214
#DirtyLaundry
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I have disdain for this kind of thing because Disco Elysium is an uncomfortable noir detective story and somebody looks at that and says, "This is fine but what if it was a heckin' wholesome cozy but also not actually a cozy either".
I don’t understand the disdain for this kind of thing. I think the concept of a non-violent detective CRPG is inherently compelling and acting obtuse about that because Disco Elysium is ‘muh communist praxis’ is really annoying.
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@ampol_moment
I know this is a joke but when President Obama said he wanted dijon mustard on television, my daughter was watching. My daughter turned to me and asked what dijon mustard is. My daughter shouldn't have had to learn about dijon mustard from television; that's what parents are for!
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@flashmeplz
Small businesses are so toxic to work for because they do that "we are all family and fighting against the big boys" shit.
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@its_hipolita
Learning that the rogue player apparently whispered all of their dungeon delving to the DM so other players couldn't hear makes elevates this story to dark comedy.
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Hello, can you give me $6,000,000 for my d20 TTRPG? I'm a famous fantasy author. Haha I appreciate the confusion but no, I'm not the guy who wrote The Black Company.
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The rules lawyer is a friend. Difficult to imagine an universe where I'm going to be mad at the players who, uh, actually read the rules of the game and want to play said game.
What's the best way to handle a rules lawyer in Dungeons & Dragons?
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@play_kinoblade
@toomuchistrue
I don't think this is pretentious at all. It's very boring and looks even worse when unveiled next to Michelle's portrait.
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There hasn't been a mainline XCOM game in seven years...
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Hello, can you give me $6,000,000 for my d20 TTRPG? I'm a famous fantasy author. Haha I appreciate the confusion but no, I'm not the guy who wrote The Black Company.
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This guy gets paid an unfathomable amount of money to me to say stuff like "barbarians in a primal rage can now channel that rage into doing their taxes, securing deductions by making Strength-based ability checks."
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@MonkipiQuinn
Imagining somebody arguing that DBZ is an adult animation because people get cut in half.
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"When you hit somebody with a weapon that has the vex property and you've unlocked that prope-" SNOOZE 😴💤
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@hyenasandgin
Imagine going back in time and showing a young Goku and Piccolo that wedding photo.
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Few XP systems in TTRPGs worse than "GM rewards XP for good play".
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@gumby4christ
Kiyoshi is so powerful because if I met a man responsible for the most horrible day of my life, I don't know what I would do.
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@colemanjspilde
It's so cool that every movie looks like on of those AI generated Wes Anderson trailers now.
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TTRPGs are wild. No other game on Earth has a contingent of people who think engaging with the mechanics of the game is bad.
Rolling dice is something that should, broadly, be avoided in RPGs. If it’s necessary to resolve something unknowable or contested or you need a random event, then sure, it’s useful. But there’s nothing inherently enjoyable about the mechanical action of rolling dice.
The issue
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@SiestaSocialist
Keffals would've 100% supported the "progressive French" over the Haitians so this tracks.
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@MonkipiQuinn
He never says he doesn't like relationships. Just the checklist way they're implemented. He's pushing against the fairly shallow way every big RPG since Mass Effect has handled romance!
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@NJD316
@coopercooperco
Even GotGv3 was less continuing the MCU and more finishing GotG's story. The final "STAR LORD WILL RETURN" squeezed in at the last second made me audibly groan in theaters because, as far as I care, that was the perfect ending for that character!
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@its_hipolita
I can't even imagine a player at my table doing something like this so I can't say what I'd do if it came up. Just absolutely terrible table etiquette and the DM should have put their foot down
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@IgnoramousC
@gracecthdralprk
Because it exists in the context of all in which it was created and came before it.
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@qwertywop
There's just a huge gap between D&D, the medieval fantasy RPG, and D&D, the game where most settings have printing presses, cafes, magitech, etc.
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@drunkenfemboy
@Octavius_DP
When in his final speech Light says he was going to move toward eliminating "the lazy" did you just not get what he was saying or...?
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I've been getting this reply a lot and I don't get the point. Yes, I can reskin my WFRP game into a sword and sandal epic or Traveller into a gritty 1920s noir, but most people are playing with the implied setting sold to them in the core rulebooks and modules.
Actually DnD can be whatever setting you want that’s the fun thing
My next game is going to be highly medieval unlike my current one which is very early modern
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The average TTRPG player would not be able to plan a real, proper, heist against a real, proper, location. The average GM and writer can't fully comprehend the security of a major bank or museum. Blades, like 99.99% of heist media, is about the broad strokes.
Hello! I have a new blogpost up, this one about doing all of the hard, annoying work of writing RPG books!
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lmao you can not make this up
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@AdamBlumenau
Why are so many people just okay with dying? Can't their villages not just buy a diamond for a resurrection spell and get one of the three mages who can cast the spell?
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The complete implosion of Warner Brothers is burning not just the goodwill people had toward HBOMax, but of streaming altogether. What's to stop any of the streaming services from locking content behind a bank vault for eternity as a tax write off?
‘Final Space’ creator Olan Rogers confirms that the series is becoming a tax write-off for Warner Bros Discovery and will be gone forever from all official channels after Netflix takes the series down internationally.
All physical copies of the series have already stopped.
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Barry and Succession over and all the featured shows are reality television trash?
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@tylerduran21
@SmallPutrk
Watch this video every time I see it and the delivery of "MIDDLE SCHOOLERS" never gets old.
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@MusketAnna
YouTube went from being the Wild West of creativity to being more censored than network television. Could you even air Law and Order: SVU on YouTube without it getting demonetized if it was an indie operation?
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Some of you are already aware, but I've been fanatically following a Kickstarter for several years now. I've read every single update and comment multiple times. Everything funny about this game can be summed up with two screenshots.
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@thegman987
@RaxKingIsDead
Like congrats on your bill funding a rail project that would bring a small segment of the US railway system up to the standards of a middle-income European country in the 1990s.
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Media analysis from the guy who got mad Abbot Elementary wouldn't do a school shooting episode.
"Breaking Bad" is quintessential fascist propaganda:
White genius conquers unworthy minorities.
A tragic self-sacrificing patriarch is under-appreciated by mediocre lessers.
Justification for creative aestheticized violence (acid vats, etc.).
Contrived worse-than villlains.
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Let's (actually) talk about Flames of Freedom.
(1/?)🧵
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Chuck Wendig is doing his song and dance on Bluesky about how he's an ally of the Internet Archive, supports it, yadayada. Still, undeniable that he made himself the face of the anti-IA blowback to the 2020 lending program.
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Are you an ally but want to relive your childhood by playing
#HogwartsLegacy
? Are you worried about what your friends may think? I'm trans and I have some tips! 🧵(1/4)
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Oh no, an adventure is structured to funnel into a combat encounter in a game where 90% of player abilities are combat oriented. I love this game so much, please don't make me engage with it, pleaseeeeeee.
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I'm sorry, but what the hell is going on with Eat the Reich's inspiration page?
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Lot of combat art in Pathfinder, but even the non-combat art tends to fit the vibes of what Pathfinder actually does. Compare the D&D piece with these from PF2's core rulebook. Superficially similar but...very much not.
It's really frustrating because like, 90% of the rules written between those art pages is specifically about killing things. Like say what you will about Pathfinder but the art depicts things you actually do in game
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@Sinister_Sophia
I don't know how anyone watched Second Renaissance and walked away thinking wow, the *robots* sure are the villains here.
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@Elad_Si
@GretaThunberg
@Eretz_Nehederet
I love how Israelis think this is endearing and doesn't put off anybody with a soul.
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@ohshidt
Hi! Tesla engineer here! Our cars are designed to do this when they feel threatened or overwhelmed. This is a safety feature to protect our customers from large predators in the wild and the horrors of modern existence!
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Before getting mad at this article, keep in mind Dave James is not a real journalist.
There's a future where you and your graphics card decide what a game looks like, not the developers. Read the full story:
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@gayest_tone
There's something about the Rhodesian mindset that makes it impossible for people like Israelis to understand that them psychotically dancing on graves won't play well anywhere outside of the editorial offices of the NYT and BBC.
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@tuffshe
@PlasticBabyFoot
@RicardoPucci4
@Kurama_Shuichi
@shiugy
@INHGamer
@HK_Sweeney
@LegoAlex98
He also cheered on the coup in Bolivia because Bolivia's lithium was state owned and the junta was going to privatize it.
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@drunkenfemboy
@Octavius_DP
1. Pedantry is a very unattractive trait.
2. The "lazy" crippled dying of a sudden heart attack isn't breaking out Webster's to check the difference between fascism and sparkling authoritarianism.
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