Beau Tucker
@BeauTucker
Followers
103
Following
65
Media
47
Statuses
169
Freelance cultural critic | Genteal ambassador | 901 survivor
Dixieland
Joined June 2024
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So many coons on 30A. this was supposed to be our last outpost. The west is fallen.
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Meeting some rushees after dinner at the country club. One got ballsy enough to ask me to bring a cigar for him. He thinks everything is sunshine and roses 😂
.
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They aren’t “upper deckies.” they aren’t “lip pillows.” They’re zyns you yankee fuckwads. Speak English and get out of my airspace.
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All I see is a ball-knower and a go-getter. Talking PCP material. If your rush analysis is that this Memphis bred boy is pike material, time to hang up the hazers chief.
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@fulmersthirdleg
Wallen? Coach, the libs aren’t suing you, they’ll probably get some fellatio action from an average Knoxville fella like you
#poser
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Yes, I am birds enjoyer. Any uga KD’s wanna talk abt it in the dm’s?
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You’re on a long road trip and stop at a gas station. You get one drink, one bag of chips, one candy, and one movie to watch for the ride. What are y’all choosing
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3rd day in a row seeing a hijab clad woman in the Vestavia Hills/Mountain Brook area. What’s going on here?
Concerned,
Beau
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@eddiesburner1
I have spread my white seed on these white sands. These are the lands of white blood.
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I got my nose in the bag, ass on the couch
Not a worry in the world with my nose in this pouch
Life is good today
Life is good today
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Ig u could say that Tridelt and Theta had some great new pc’s roll in
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Yeah bro, must be nice walking through nigshit and tent city to drop your kids off for drag queen story hour. I’ll stick to my slice of heaven in Dixieland ya Guido.
#sorrynotsorry
most goated region on planet earth u can’t change my mind
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Just devoured a delicious blackened grouper, restaurant aux was set to Dead, ABB, and Jerry Garcia Band. Fore/4 experience.
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Found my boy doing some light reading. Gent is going to make his massa a most delectable pecan pie.
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Mom made me tomato pie for lunch, finishing it down with some Arnold Palmer. Proud to say I’m not a resident of section ape.
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To those asking in my dm’s: no, Margot Robbie’s child is not mine.
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@sketchy_cactus
There’s usually a deal going down in the parking right outside the red pier by this REI so stock up on that 901 dust
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Lot of japs taking swings nowadays but ig it’s better than watching Muslim endorsed ball
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@jewish_cpa
Good lord Corpy.
Going to hate to see the section 8 stench descend upon our hidden gem. Seriously, if you listen to “electronic music” and/or have used food stamps, stay the fuck out of homewood. This is a pool hall and brewery, stick to sidebar for zoo rituals.
Concerned,
Beau
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Gonna log off. Someone let me know when my feed will be back to my normal preferred content.
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Can’t wait to see mullet Moby Dick and his gf (next My 500 lb Life star) repping this shit at dega
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When this dime tells me it’s my time to send nudes I’m going to pull a WSP hat hat-trick on her.
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if u see this Do It
name: Beau
pronouns: Conservative
height: enuff
sexuality: Women with big honkers
sign: Taurus
piercings: I’m a man
tattoos: None yet
fav color: Camo or crimson
fav drink: Busch or liberal tears
fav food: Ribs
fav animal: My wife
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Having a 45 year old mom means you drink all the left over Prosecco when her brunch party leaves. Best booze is
#free
booze
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@NBAUNKLEKRACKER
Legacy Edition of the album gets a lot of airtime at the Tucker plantation. Cheers.
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Shit so hard, my asshole hurts worse than a pikapp’s on big brother night
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Insta ads without fail before my opening weekend back home. Mtn Brook location, prepare yourself. Beau is about to drop a bag.
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Me showing back up at the bar after the guys paid for my Uber early because I’m “too drunk”
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Sombreropeople 0-2 in regards to coming to finish my pool. DEA and ICE on speed dial.
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@CletusEnsonIII
Cletus, it was hopping a few weeks ago with stews. Nice little place, but tent city outside of the venue. Watch your wallet and women.
-Beau
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@bigtensucks9
First slide: old row Nashville politics trump pic
Second slide: this isn’t about politics, be in prayer for the trump family
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@biggeebman
Haven’t been able to watch more than 10 minutes of game day in years. I’ll stick to my boys in Marty and McGee and the SECN crew. No need for those yankee gimmicks.
Beau
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@hdingilburry
It’s so forced. You’re not 20. Put on your goddamn shirt and stick to some wit if you want to be funny on air. All these yankee cheap tricks aren’t necessary.
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Was thinking about pulling the trigger on this purchase just apprehensive to add some t shirts instead of polos to my wardrobe. Thoughts BV?
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