RIP (̴̫̀(̵̱̆(̸̹̉Andrew Paul)̴̮́)̸̣́)̵̪̂
@AnAndyPaul
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Now on B*uesky (@)andrewpaul. Will dole out invites if asked politely.
America's Heartland
Joined August 2010
Don't wanna be here?
Send us removal request.
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it’s (@)andrewpaul on there now btw
i have ascended to B*uesky
same account handle
it was the best of times. it was the worst of times, y'all
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dead serious here: how long until Elon blames the Jews for killing Twitter?
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lemme tell y’all something.
hearing a crowd of a couple hundred chant “I wanna be at the RNC / I wanna be like Dan Bongino” after
@NickLutsko
’s killer first night in Chicago was one of the best ways to process our current insanity. felt like scream therapy.
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@SteveScalise
hey steve remember when you called yourself "david duke but without the baggage?"
tells you all you need to know
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@JoyceCarolOates
sorry no one told you ahead of time we turn into werewolves at the sight of a full moon, joyce
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it’s July 4th weekend so you know what that means…
that’s right, i profiled the unlikely rise and even unlikelier leftist force of nature that is
@GatorsDaily
for
@inputmag
!
it doesn’t get much more American than alligators and agitators, folks
🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
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@benshapiro
i think way more than 3,000 Iraqi families are missing someone right now, too, ben
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my entire career has led to the following sentence:
i Pepe Silvia'ed the hell outta your Slurp Juice Ape memes and turns out you've all been trolled by crypto-fascists.
TGIF
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The whole internet loves Wordle, a lovely word game that uses words!
*5 seconds later*
We regret to inform you the app was purchased by the NYT
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you let Andrew Anglin — a literal neo-Nazi who founded the notorious neo-Nazi website The Daily Stormer — back on Twitter yesterday
he was banned since 2015, but i guess he doesn't fall into that 10% of "far right extremists"
shut the absolute fuck up
You know Twitter is being fair when extremists on far right and far left are simultaneously upset!
Twitter aims to serve center 80% of people, who wish to learn, laugh & engage in reasoned debate. ❤️
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@elonmusk
@iamharaldur
ha ha ha you really got him by *checks notes*
mocking a disabled person with a reference to a nearly 25-year-old movie specifically skewering white collar pieces of shit like yourself
BASED ELON ZOMG 🤣🤣🤣
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doing some research on Matt Walsh's transphobic documentary released yesterday and boosting this perfect comment to offer any of your bigoted acquaintances in the future
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@rgay
they sent the follow-up 3 weeks after pitching. hardly any of us at this level of freelancing have safety nets or steady/reliable income.
asking if we have even a chance at publication after 3 weeks doesn't seem that outlandish.
signed,
a writer who can't afford healthcare
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@benshapiro
cool cool they had careers prior to today got it.
any thoughts on what they actually said, or...? cause that shit was pretty spectacularly damning.
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welp.
dead serious here: how long until Elon blames the Jews for killing Twitter?
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i spent weeks researching the tunnels beneath
@NickLutsko
's Grandma's house and lived to tell the tale.
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don't worry everyone the Queen of TERFs still reigns supreme
Some may find the outpouring of British shock and grief at this moment quaint or odd, but millions felt affection and respect for the woman who uncomplainingly filled her constitutional role for seventy years. 1/2
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this an absolute travesty.
sleep well. tomorrow is war.
FBI is raiding Grandma’s Basement as I type. Grandma is blaming me even though is her basement!
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happy one-year anniversary to
@NickLutsko
's Spirit Halloween theme song.
seems like only yesterday that we first learned of the men in the tunnels underneath grandma's house.
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@abrahamjoseph
yeah...why does Miller's weird moral absolutism work so well with West's voice? like, i always assume Miller would want it read with Affleck's or Bale's ridiculous gravel-tone. but on a more metalevel West feels more appropriate.
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make
@NickLutsko
’s Gremlins 3 idea a nonnegotiable plank of the
@dnc
party platform, you cowards
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apart from everything else,
the fact that Elon watched Office Space and thinks he's a Ron Livingston instead of a Gary Cole tells you everything you need to know
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updated our coverage to reflect who first reported on the story (
@ChrisUKSharp
@LiberationTimes
@ddeanjohnson
)
fact remains: Congress is lowkey super spooked about all these UFO sightings
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someone plz forward this to Dan Bongino he still has me blocked :(
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new Lutsko just dropped thank depp
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rubber-banned man.
JUST IN: New York lawmakers introduce legislation ban doctors from performing virginity checks after TI interview
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My son Elon will never earn my love
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every time Kevin McCarthy loses the House vote again
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if you do not fix this injustice immediatley
@verified
i will unverify myself in front of the entire world
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🚨🚨🚨HI I HAVE NEWS🚨🚨🚨
as the ink is drying, i am thrilled to announce that i am coming aboard
@PopSci
as their staff tech news writer
looking forward to keeping everyone in the loop on all our latest cyborgs developments
❤️❤️❤️
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good morning i have come to the conclusion that my dog looks exactly like Michael Shannon
plz clap.
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it would appear the UK has somehow found a way to out-fuck up our 2016 election.
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@benshapiro
huh i guess that’s what they said to African Americans during Jim Crow, too? almost as if it’s that’s an easy fallback to justify whatever you want.
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one of the least covered but most unsettling things about Elon Musk is that he legit believes in population collapse and is attempting to literally spread his seed as a solution
Doing my best to help the underpopulation crisis.
A collapsing birth rate is the biggest danger civilization faces by far.
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plz don't inadvertently turn your house into an extension of the police-industrial complex's surveillance state
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attn:
@wbpictures
plz let Tad Philips know
@NickLutsko
has already written Joker 2's first song and that if he uses anything else he's in violation of Hollywood's ethical standards
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happy birthday to the absolute legend of a character actor, Brad Dourif. in a sea of profound and epic monologues, he got one of the best in Deadwood
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Elon banning people from Twitter like it's a punishment
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returning here to confirm i am one of roughly 8 people left at the 151-year-old publication, Popular Science
my colleagues were some of the best i've worked with, and so many are gone that there's not enough space to write them out
hire them
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hi i’m in Vegas again, but this time we’re getting married.
here’s to years’ more revolving sushi dinners with her.
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@benshapiro
ben why did you put asterisks in those words? i can't read them and don't know what they mean. plz explain.
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you probably heard about monkeypox over the past couple weeks. so has QAnon. and they have thoughts.
a little rabbit hole dive for
@inputmag
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always love it when i get the chance report on what’s happening back home
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y'all that's not Riz Ahmed that's Aziz Ansari
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wow didn’t think they could make a film adaptation of a single image
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a lot of y'all don't want to believe the truth is out there and it shows.
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if you haven't seen Andrew's video from the George Floyd protests, you are missing out on one of the most important journalist dispatches from the past few years.
bummed for AGNB, but really looking forward to his next project
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i interviewed the two childhood best friends responsible for making a Pringles mascot hoax on Wikipedia that became official company canon.
long live Julius Pringles.
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i wrote about a lesser known controversial and disturbing horror project that coincidentally turned tragic as i finished the story for
@FANGORIA
because i really know how to ring in a new year
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the woke mind virus has cancelled Eve6
i regret to inform you that we have come into close contact with someone who has the woke mind virus and we are going to have to cancel the rest of the tour
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*Goo Goo Dolls voice*
do you wanna get marrrrrrried
(aNd rUnAwAy)
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@jaredlholt
"I Disapprove of What You Say, But I Will Defend to the Death Your Right to Say It" -- DogBoner69
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@MilesKlee
@ScottAdamsSays
"what if we could kill the bad people we don't like? thank you for coming to my TedTalk
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