Peju of Gateauxbyshay
@Agumsy
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A soft babe working hard to live a soft life || Busy drowning in my bag, please do not resuscitate.
Utopia
Joined January 2017
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So you held the raw chicken, arranged it, snapped the picture.
Opened the legs and probably used your hands to enhance the gaping hole, snapped it again, went to your camera roll, selected both of them, typed the caption and pressed send ?
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One agbero helped me cross the road one time from emerald to unilag gate.
He started waiting for me everyday.
One time he was traveling and he brought a replacement for the duration he was going to be away for 😂.
They’re kind sometimes.
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I spanked my kid and she’s consoling her self in front of the mirror
“ Seyi don’t cry okay
“Mommy beat you ?”
It’s okay, sorry “
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭I’m rolling
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Indomie generation but Na them hoard the indomie pass.
Royal thief .
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Indomie is bad for your children, stop overdoing it, it has high sodium content and has no nutrients, if you must do Indomie for the kids, please keep it minimal and fortify it with vegetables and protein..if possible, do away with the sachet seasoning .
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You will never see a woman of this age discussing young boys and what they do on IG, you know why ? They don’t care for these things.
The only reason why men know so much about these women, is because they check for them, they use one mouth to abuse them, the other to dm them.
Women of this age only care about materialistic things. — Music Executive, Dayo Adeneye tackles ladies
🎥:
@thehonestbunchpodcast
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The same way you guys travel and take a million pictures in Dubai mall and probably leave some of their locals irritated is the same way those people who go to shoprite to take pictures and enjoy with their families are doing the same...so please, stop with all the condescension
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I hid my last relationship and the most I did was use our interlocked hands on my header, it still spoiled, people still chatted shit.
You hide you don’t hide, damned if you do damned if you don’t .
Love is not math, there’s no working formula, do you, let people do them. Thrive.
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Him to you : I want you in my life and I’m certain of that.
Him to his friends : bro that babe don taya meeee, she no gree leave me alone bro. I don tire guy !!!!
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Wanneka will post herself in the deep forests of Cambodia and Thailand and tell you that she’s looking for hair.
Still upon still, she will sell you sponge and fiber .
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This thread is very unnecessary, not every topic is up for discussion on the TL, if it were men talking about slack vaginas and saggy or small boobs, y'all would be boiling....stop this crap ....
Have you ever backed out of having sex with a guy cus he never had a lot going on down there?
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I hate how weird dating is right now.
Everyone is trying to be smart.
Unnecessary shalaye.
Bad intentions.
Two people can’t just kick it and have fun cause one party is plotting and the other party is trying to make sure they’re not running then street and everything is just
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Nobody talks about how hard intimacy with someone Else is after a break up. After being used to one persons body for a while, you have to now start all over again with someone else. No please. Dead exhausting.
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Using bleach and hot water to clean your floors .
Love it so much, a hack for fresh smelling space, add a few drops of eucalyptus oil to your hot mopping water, your space will smell fresh for longer
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Men have acted like sex and vagina are gold for so long, cheat and jeopardize your entire relationship for sex, spend money and tell lies for sex, kill for sex, cry and beg for sex, women now want to gift you with sex and all of a sudden, it is not a good enough gift ??
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This looks like body shaming to me, there’s are black women who look like the model in the second frame.
There are whites women who look like the woman in the first frame.
This isn’t about skin color, it’s about body types, Allison.
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This ss3 mean boy savage behavior is so ridiculous. Men in their 20’s, 30’s and 40s talking about women like they’re cd’s from a rental store. So many behaviors y’all don’t outgrow and it is scary.
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I want to agree so bad but Nigerians do not know how to love people that aren’t their own. It is why even after they’ve adopted one child, a woman in her 50’s will risk her life to carry triplets.
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I was 22 when I got pregnant, the person responsible was 29 and his family still had the guts to say " omo kekere l'on se" (meaning he is still a small boy).. LOL... if you allow people, even a fifty year old person will still be a baby..
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I forgot i was watching tv with my mother, shirtless sweaty guy appeared on the screen and i said "damn boy"......she stoned me with her water bottle. 😂😂😂😂
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Did a big wedding in 2021. They hired two of us to do desserts, a night before, the event planner calls me and asks if I can take an additional 200 because the second persons husband forbade her from doing the job 😂😂😂.
I can never forget someone in my industry telling me to do all the events I can now because when I get married there will be days my husband will tell me I can’t go for an event.I asked why,maybe we had plans or something,She said he can just wake up and decide he didn’t want me
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People that tie bandage on their knees and ankles after 1 hour of Saturday football ?!
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I entered a regular cab one day and the driver touched my thigh, I asked him if he was mad, he called an Ashawo, I wanted to kill him but I live next to soldiers, I acted normal and when I got to my house, I told the soldiers, they made him wash all the cars on my street. Idiot.
“Women are rude to Uber drivers”
Uber drivers are horrible towards women. In fact, men in general are a lot more badly behaved when they are serving women.
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Iyabo and Pauloo are both finished.
But it’s Iyabo I want to address, I’m happy for her because she’s been married, has two adult kids that are of marriage age 😂😂😂. She’s supposed to be jaded, but this love is doing them like high school love and it’s such a joy to see.
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“I can see her excellenceh, coming in with her stylish head gear, former First Lady of Nigeria , Dame Patience, our mommy, mommy of the nation, ladies and gentlemen men please out your hands together for our mommy”
See as inauguration dey organized and quiet.
Dem for don dey shout "Women of Owu, you've danced enough, go and sit down, go and sit down, thank you" for APC Inauguration.
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Quoting this to remind you that Mother’s Day occurring multiple times a year is not a random thing.
It is very deliberate and Mother’s Day everyday still wouldn’t be enough. God bless the moms who hold it down and do parenthood without excuses. May your kids bring you joy . ❤️
"I'm destined for something great"
18-year-old Nigerian Ahmed Salami always dreamed of stardom. He was born with autism, cerebral palsy and ADHD.
He posts weekly videos on YouTube to share his personal journey and inspire others.
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The PR for toasting men has been at an all time high.
Don’t do it o.
My husband can say this and honestly I wouldn’t be bothered. I did see him, fell in love with him and went after him and it took 8 months for him to come around. 🤣
8 months later we were married. So it was a 16 months project! From Dec 13th 1996 to April 17th 1998.
I was 23
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Men that tear shirt and shout and enter street when their team score goals, do all sorts of jumping and shouting. It’s when your friends have wins you won’t take it seriously ? Nice one, Agents of strictness and composure.
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The best
They may give you STDs but at least you gon be scratching inside your own house.
Abuja sugar daddies 🤝 buying properties for their side chicks
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This person is also proof that being religious outwardly alone is pointless. Her media is full of her preaching but she’s nothing but a senior bully.
Ore there’s discipline and there’s abuse. Statistics has shown that parental abuse occurs when your mum or dad ends up with another person.
Buts it’s you and you can’t know the difference. So I’m sure we all get it.
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Allow people to enjoy things, people want to go to shoprite with their families and take a dozen pictures, that’s their problem, that’s why is fun to them, that’s what they can afford, to them, that is a “ghen ghen” and fun place to be excited about,...allow people enjoy things.
When are people going to understand that Shoprite isn’t an amusement park? 🤦🏾♀️
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This thread. See how it talked about an issue respectfully to shed more light and create awareness. None of that crass thing that razz Nigerian Twitter doctors do.
Today was a tough one. Little baby girl comes in for “recurrent UTIs”. Parent is frustrated because she’s been to ER multiple times this year when these symptoms started where she’s given antibiotics & sent home. But symptoms always come back - belly pain, pain in urination,…
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Like I always say, if you have to apologize after sex and be sending apology messages , you have committed a sexual crime, there are a million and one things to say after sex. “Sorry” isn’t one of them. If the sex was consensual, you shouldn’t be apologizing for shit.
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Did they have to carry her with her legs wide like that.
Also glad her face isn’t showing.
But also when do we realize that videoing someone naked woman or man is just hella weird.
Happened at AP filling station Falomo, Lagos... ☹️☹️☹️
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@WendyA__
My mom had gotten us ready for school and while she was getting ready, I opened my lunch pack and started eating the chicken, in the process, the whole food fell on the floor and it was at that point she came out. I didn’t eat meat and chicken for a whole year even at parties.
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Update guys : taxi man did “press up” all night, the soldiers told him to come and tell me sorry, he’s going to wash the cars on my street before they release him 😭low key feel bad but when I remember that he grabbed my neck in front of my kid and made her cry..I get angry again
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If you go to buy Suya and you see plenty flies, don’t buy, those niggas are smelling what you cannot smell, rotten meat..
The heat and smoke should chase them or keep them at a minimum, If the flies are many, run !!!
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You people have turned innoson into the brand you only remember when you want to dash someone something. May they not turn your sweat to charity center.
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In all of this, Kiki will suffer the most backlash and a lot of you won’t bat an eyelid because you don’t like her, you want her to be the thief so bad. And that’s how you know that your hypocrisy stinks to the high heavens:
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Client sent me 55,000 instead of 55,800? I called her everyday to remind her...I even told her to send it as recharge card, she refused, one day I ran into her at shop rite and I made sure she paid for my shortbread biscuit .
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Not everything is content.
A child says stop recording, simply stop.
You probably don’t care about my opinion and you shouldn’t but I hope the rest of you respect your children’s rights to media privacy.
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You see that second point about Neuroticism ? Very important
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I know someone that used to : kick her maids in the vagina and put pepper
She used to measure her yam tubers so her maids won't eat
She would strategically place rice grains on the freezer and remember the pattern so that if her maids opened the freezer, she would know..
If Nigerian house helps ever got to write their own stories, the wickedness in our homes would scare slave owners.
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Yes sure, everybody gather round, let's make a joke about infertility, an issue that causrs people so much pain, so much money, and sometimes severes marriages, causrs depression and sometimes suicide .Tuck in your insensitive stupidity and reflect on your life this was not funny
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I know this is a thing, but you’re not smelling all the women ovulating at once.
That’s a huge lie.
Also, With the amount of testosterone in an average gym, you weren’t smelling shit.
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Cancer is scary you know why ?? You never see it coming.
Yearly checks may not even save you.
It is on some yearly routine check that some people discover they have stage 4 something.
It’s the most wicked and twisted sickness on earth. That and autoimmune diseases. The worst !!
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This thread is so irritating. And this is why I’ll forever tell babes to end shit once a guy starts acting crazy. End shit and take care of yourselves.
One thing you’ll understand is, a lot of men are cowards and lack communication skills.
This thread is proof.
that phase where you slowly start hating your girlfriend is crazy😭
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Omo commitment is scary, nothing makes it permanent, not marriage, not kids, nothing.
If they wake up and no longer choose you, you must bounce, you can’t fight it. You have to let it go.
May the ones who choose us, the ones who we commit to, choose us always until death. ❤️😭🙏
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My ex waited around for 8 months, disvirgined me and deleted me from BBM and blocked my phone calls.
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My child asked me a question and I didn’t know the answer, next thing she goes
“You need to go back to school, you don’t know some things”
Lmao gosh.
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They worry too much, hold on to their children too much, sacrifice too much, carry on so much on their own, never really get to enjoy life, cause they end up even being moms to their children’s children, I wish they’d give less fucks, be selfish and have fun more.
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Chioma is a grown woman and knows what she’s doing but Will Smith is helpless and needs to be freed from the shackles of Jada.
Mmmkay.
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I’ll never forget asking God for a positive sign to agree to be someone’s GF.
I saw a full rainbow few hours later, took that as a sign and said yes.
Worst relationship ever.
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If I marry someone and he wants a DNA, no wahala, but after all is said and done and the kids are yours you’ll explain to me why you felt the need to and whatever happens to the relationship afterwards is all you.
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They also failed their daughter but I’ll tell you for free that they themselves felt grateful that someone married their “incomplete and imperfect” child.
Nigerian families are wicked to their own daughters who don’t fit into what an ideal wife should be. “Just be grateful”
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As a woman you need an unbelievable amount of pride to date men.
If not, you’ll be hearing tales of how he’s tired of how clingy you are, meanwhile text messages tell a different story. 😂😂.
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This is what they do when feminists make impact, bullshit it, reduce it, poke holes in it, hijack it.
Good morning. You see this whole Endsars money joke has gone on for too long and so it was only irritating at first. So if you want to make a claim with your full chest that you gave me Endsars funds that were embezzled, do it under this tweet. Let’s close the chapter once.
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If your child says they don’t want you to go somewhere and they start crying more than they usual “mommy, daddy don’t go” and behaving out of the ordinary, stay back.
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I’ve always had a soft spot for female sex workers, judging from some moral privileged high horse is daft.
Sex work isn’t easy and it isn’t pleasant but for a lot of them, it is what kept a sick father from dying, it is what paid jamb and other things.
It is survival
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I never used to rate Nathaniel Bassey, I mean u liked a few songs of his, but the minute he started that Hallelujah challenge and started convincing Nigerians that miracles would happen if you did Instagram live worship in the midnight,😂😂😂 i knew there was problem
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One of the guys installing these panels is bleaching.
I’m educating him about the dangers seeing as his job is to work under sun installing panels. He say his wife likes yellow men: God abeg.
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I raise you “soaking” and a 3rd party jumping on the bed while a couple “soaks” lmao.
It’s how people think they can deceive God🙊
That whole "everything but penetration" virgin phenomenon is so crazy to me. Do you know how evil you gotta be to try to gaslight God on a technicality?
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Men are the champs of leading women on and marrying someone else. Also the kings of leaving long marriages to marry someone they just met .But see them sewing thread and thesis. Continue showing them shege because the man you’re leading on has led 20 women on in his past.
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She regrets not telling her mom she adopted before her mom died.
She was not comfortable with lying about adoption, she did it anyway.
She was not comfortable with a lot of what she did. She sha did it. God forbid !!!
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Without Social media, the chrisland teacher that raped and abused the toddler would have gone scot free
Truth is nigeria is a pedophile's paradise.
Pastor rapes children in congregation? Church covers it up.
Teacher rapes student? School covers it up.
Parent rapes child? Family covers it up.
It's no wonder they go abroad and think they can do same and get away with it.
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The worst part about child sexual abuse in Nigeria is, even the police you want to report to can be raping their househelp at home. The Pastor you want to go to for counseling might also be guilty of it.
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The worst and most senseless part about Tyler Perry slander is that every single movie he’s made, is a reflection of so many realities, do black women not settle for these type of men? He has amazing actors and great video quality but y’all slander him because one person started.
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Is it just me or does every other babe like to be picked up for dates ?
Like I know I can Uber or drive but will you pick me up ?? Even better when the guy offers 😍😍😍. Makes me so happy.
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Not having sex is not a hard or difficult thing, a lot of you especially men just lack discipline and self control.
Someone says they haven’t had sex in years and you think it’s journey to Mt Everest or you think they’re lying because your weak self willed ass can’t comprehend.
Y’all really believe Women when they say they haven’t had sex in “months”?
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Erik is such a man, the way he told Helen to go fuck herself in the most respectable way.
“I will not wrestle with that ghost, I have too many of my own”
#SweetMagnolias
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You can be the sweetest kindest most generous human being in the world.
How you treat your domestic staff however is an indication of your true character.
The ones who can’t pay you, the ones who serve you, that’s the biggest tell.
What's a hill that you're willing to die on 1000% of the time?
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My mom taking me to White House, spa, salon and to get a pedicure a day after she found out I was pregnant at 22.
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Lmao jokes apart a lot of boomer male female friendships are like this. Very affectionate and intense and no strings attached. Also the generation between boomers and millennials
🥹 Friendships don't get cuter than this.
Love love Chidi Mokeme and Kate Henshaw.
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I sha know a lot of people aren’t genuinely in love with each other. It’s either money, yansh, clout, beauty; connections, that has brought a lot of couples together. Good luck to all involved…
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