The last time I was in this Goodwill was 3 years ago when I was looking for a cheap navy blazer, a red tie, and New Balance 990s… boy how the time flies
At the rec you will see the hottest girl you’ve ever seen in your life on the treadmill next to a KA newboy on his 500th flight of stairs on the stairmaster
@MaxBloomberg69
Bagged one of the hotter women I ever penised by drunkenly liking her instagram story and getting a random Snapchat from her the next day. It’s literally free
Closed down Jackie’s last night. Didn’t know they did that. Barely got to hear the songs I queued on TouchTunes before I got the boot. Figure this has something to do with the little prick in my profile picture
#SamadsAmerica
Just liked a girl’s instagram story only to realize it was a picture of her sister that she had posted. If anyone wants to shoot me in the head for me lmk
Wait guys I just thought of this new instagram caption I’m gonna use for my new post from this weekend. It’s going to be: “We ate the dawgs!” Creative, eh?
Wrapping up 6.5 hr drive. Thought to myself “wow my eyes hurt from staring at the road as much as they do when I stare at a screen for a long time.” I then realized: How silly of me. I have not put my phone down the entire drive.
#classic