kurt cozain
@zainislost
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25,836
i have a normal relationship with alcohol and my father as well
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Joined April 2017
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Pinned Tweet
Click here to support Zains Top Surgery!!! (finally!) organized by
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hey if you’re ever really anxious or a little too high just remeber that there’s cameras watching you at all times and all of your loved ones are actors paid to be nice to you
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my dad has finally hit his trans ally era and he just said to me while changing my tire “as a lady you can get away with not knowing how to do this but as a boy you need to know so get down here” and it’s the most validated i’ve ever felt
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she just posted up looking sexy as fuck when she knows. ppl can see her so now i have to kill my self. thanks a lot
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i serve tables and date femmes bc i rlly love being told what to do
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sometimes i forget my gf is white and then she calls her grandpa pee paw and i’m like oh right
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i like girly girls and girly boys and boyly girls and boyly boys as well
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oh brother!
if you’ve ever had ur birthday ruined by a significant other u should be entitled for financial compensation
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turns out the key to a healthy relationship is to just say “yes ma’am” all the time and do exactly what my girlfriend tells me to
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i gladly have sex on the first date bc i’m a slut and also a whore
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sleeping with bad bitches is SOO hard like why did i just get up and fart in this bitches closet while she went to the bathroom
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hey guys so i’m currently in the car moving out of state with my childhood best friend as we speak and growing up i always thought that i would k word myself before something like that could happen for me so i think that’s pretty cool and i thought i’d say that out loud
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somewhere in the world right now there is a caucasian couple doing an acoustic cover of kill bill on their couch
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i just got a call from the “she broke i’m up” factory and they actually offered me a share of the company
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a month ago me and my neighbor agreed to stick to casual sex so things didn’t get serious. now we’re driving 3 hours so she can meet my friends and family so yeah i think i did a good job in that regard
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my mom coming up to hug me at my friends funeral and whispering “you smell like beer” in my ear was my bojack horseman moment
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who want me? i have no perception of love, i’m definitely on the spectrum, i’m five foot four, my blood is 75% beer and i’m a transgender
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the most vile woman you’ve ever met just posted a picture of a fairy sitting on an orchid or something and captioned it “this is me btw”
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victoria secret should make boxers, i think it’d be cunt to have my waistline peek and it just says “PINK”
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i actually have so much sex and i am so good at it that every time i do it i cry
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she’s so toxic and mean and weird. i think i’ll marry her
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told this girl we shouldn’t hook up anymore so we can keep it casual and then i accidentally tripped and fell and ate her pussy 😞💔 maybe next time
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@beautyqueenx_x
@PeralesKeilah
@JuiceTooWavie
who are you to state what God is? God did not come to earth and write the bible. God is anything and everything. God is energy, God is not a human being. God can be whatever you want him/her to be. so if i see my God as a woman, then so be it. it’s not at all deep.
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i wonder if motorcycle ppl are ever embarrassed that they’re all out in the open like that bc me personally i would be
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turns out the side effect of not eating and drinking exclusively beer for 3 days in a row is that you pass out at work and have to get carried through the kitchen like a baby by a big bearded man
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@beautyqueenx_x
@PeralesKeilah
@JuiceTooWavie
so because i’m gay i am less Christian than you are? i’ll have you know i was raised in a very strictly Catholic family, i am very much a believer. and your true lack of practicing the beliefs you were raised soon shows by your ignorant belief that i am less of a christian.
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yalls boyfriends be ugly as fuuuuck pls stop posting them PLSSS i’m begging you
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this is the most respectful bite someone could ever possibly take
Whether you find this endearing or infuriating is a good indicator as to whether or not you deserve a partner
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i don’t wanna hear NONE of y’all trying to say i cheated. tuh. and that’s the note i’ll leave it on bc don’t play me
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deleted twitter bc i needed to take care of my mental health and then last night my car broke down at a random gas station an hour away from
my house and i have no money and i move out of state in one week exactly so i’m conclusion i’m back on twitter
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god bless the south, i just got two new tires put on my car for 70 dollars from some southern gentleman i found on facebook marketplace with a car shop in his backyard and he let me smoke cigarettes in there while he did it
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colleen’s stupid ass apology song has been stuck in my head since it came out i won’t even lie yall
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um yea so can everyone stop getting sober or married it’s rlly harshing my vibe
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many of my thoughts are. hmmm…beer. but also every once in a while, also, beautiful women. and sometimes when i’m really really feeling silly, i think. cigarette
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i love women. i can name every single one of them to prove it
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snapchat memories are rlly goated when feeling an undying sense of yearning for the person you once were and a quiet dread as you realize you’ll never be that person again is the vibe
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dating my next door neighbor is awesome bc i just have to leave my grubby little hobbit hole and walk five steps to experience girl air
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i was rlly in love with this stranger on the internet so i harassed and stalked her until she loved me and now we’ve been together for 6 months so in conclusion don’t ever give up
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okay but what if i want your gf more than you... like why are you being so selfish right now
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i just got a call from the handsome prince factory and they’re literally begging me to return to work, the entire franchise is falling apart
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the worst woman you’ve ever met is talking shit about some girl she’s never met and ending it with “and i’m way prettier than her anyways”
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some ppl just get a kick out of being a mean person and that is rlly sad
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when i die do NOT be lying to my gf saying i would’ve wanted her to move on. how dare u who do u think u are
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lord free me from the shackles of wanting to tweet every single thing that comes into my brain ever
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not to be the ‘my girls super hot’ guy but. my girls super hot
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sometimes i’ll be laughing and then i remember that i have matching tattoos with TWO of my exes and ain’t shit funny anymore
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somebody send me 30 dollars for marijuana right now and i won’t kill myself
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one day you’re worried about patching up holes in ur walls so u don’t lose ur security deposit and the fact that you need to go to the grocery store bc you need more eggs and then the next day ur friend is dead and now you’re a changed person forever
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one of the most humbling experiences in my life was when i went to an alternative school and this boy asked me “what’s your girl name?” i got all mad and said “i’m not fucking telling you that” bc i thought he was being transphobic. he was not. he was asking my gfs name ☺️
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this is how i walk up to strangers when i’m drunk to ask for a cigarette
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bad news for my haters….not only did i wake up today but it’s my bday
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it’s fine bc you actually can’t break my childlike sense of wonder or my undying fighting spirit so haha whatever
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guy like me gets fomo when my friends go out at all, like damn no invite to the grocery store pookie?
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hey i know we just met but i just want you to know that i’m in love with you and i would lay my entire life down on the line for you
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the trans experience is having ppl flirt with you and then halfway into the convo they misgender you and you realize you’re still trans even when ur drunk
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just got new tires for my car with the remaining money i had. both of those tires exploded last night after i hit a curb. the universe is hilarious for thinking i won’t just kill myself
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so did we ever get around to finding out who let the dogs out or…:/
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this “child of an alcoholic parent turned alcoholic” pipeline got me GOOD boy lemme tell you
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i kidnapped my gf from beautiful princess island and now they have a bounty out for my head. she was their queen
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