Simon Fisher
@therealsjpf
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Bright-eyed young archdeacon breathless above.
St Helens & Warrington
Joined October 2011
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Have I just admitted the youngest churchwarden in
@churchofengland
?
Cerys has just turned 18. Many thanks for her serving St Luke’s Lowton
@LivDiocese
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I am going to parents’ evening with Charles (11) (normally this is Mrs Fisher’s duty).
Mrs F’s instructions: ‘Don’t say anything embarrassing. Pretend to be a normal person who knows how to talk to people.’
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The stripping of the altar after mass tonight consisted of not much more than folding up the handkerchief that serves me as a corporal on the dining table, and taking off a stole, while the rest of the family read Psalm 22.
But I can hardly remember a more emotional one.
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It was announced yesterday that I will be taking up a new post as the next Archdeacon of St Helens and Warrington. My last day at Tuebrook will be Sunday 12th January. It's a great privilege to have been chosen for this ministry, though we will all be sad to leave St John’s.
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#IWasBaptised
in the car park of Peterborough Hospital, with a pipette to drop water into my baby incubator as I was carried to the ambulance on my way to Great Ormond Street. The first time in my short life that my parents had left my side, but the Lord was with me.
Today the Church marks the Baptism of Christ.
Where were you baptised? Use
#IWasBaptised
to let us know.
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Great moment at Zoom Morning Prayer today.
@paulbayes
was reading Numbers 22.36-23.12, in which Balak asks Balaam a lot of questions. His Alexa machine decided to answer... "I don't know that one...I don't know that one...I don't know that one."
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Best feedback this morning, from surprised worshipper after mass:
‘When they said the archdeacon was coming, I thought it would be a decrepit old man.’
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Read in a parish profile today. Most honest description ever?
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Charles Read, talking about the vote for funding training for ministry, observes that while PT and non-residential training is thought to be cheaper, there are hidden costs, often borne by ordinands themselves. True and important.
#synod
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My two piano-playing children have taught themselves ‘God Save the Queen’ and play it multiple times a day. I’ve decided I only need to stand up if they’re also singing it.
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Hester (2) is getting dressed ‘so I can go to school.’ She is very keen on school. But (1) she doesn’t go to school, (2) the schools are closed, (3) it’s Saturday. So I think her chances are low today.
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Hester (2), pretends to read from her bible:
"'Lazaras, come out of the tomb.'"
We smile, impressed by this excellent recall.
She continues:
"'Lazarus, go back into the tomb.'"
"'I don't want to go back into the tomb. There's nothing to do in the tomb.'"
#almostignatian
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My vulnerable parents are obviously suffering.
"What are you eating today" I ask.
"Just ordinary venison," they answer.
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We are due to move house, and now can’t. (Removal firms not working.) And I have moved all the good wine to the new house. And now it’s a feast day.
Never plan ahead.
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So, I didn’t know my phone could send sound recordings as an audio message. It seems to have happened by accident, and the recipient was the Archdeacon.
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We had some chocolate left over from baking. I suggested in jest that the first person to wear a hat, scarf and gloves and eat it with a knife and fork could have it. 10 seconds later this was the scene:
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Happy Christmas to all, and especially to brother & sisters of the
#clergymaltclub
The ox knows its master.
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The Fisher family have kept vigil again. Happy Easter to all! He is risen indeed.
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Deeply uncomfortable at Morning Prayer as I find myself bowing at the name of Jesus...Barabbas.
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The Archdeacon of Lincoln makes a plea for *directors* of safeguarding, with a one-stop whistleblowing shop when their advice is disregarded, so that if bishops, archdeacons etc disregard advice it can be openly and independently reviewed there & then. FWIW I agree.
#synod
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Today’s Christmas cards are from a bishop and (separately) a wine-merchant. I would like to be able to tell you this wasn’t typical.
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In a glorious echo of the out-of-touch prelacy of yesteryear, the Bishop telephoned me this morning to ask what county my archdeaconry was in.
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Preparing paperwork, registers etc for handover on leaving the parish. I have baptised 252 people over the last nine years (plus 3 only baptised by others). Prayers for them all.
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This year’s
#clergymaltclub
bottle was an (unnecessary but appreciated) gift fro one of my clergy earlier in the year. Thinking of and praying for not only the giver but for them all.
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The Archbishop of Canterbury laments that questions have been "all about us" and hopes that later sessions at
#synod
will be more "outward-looking". Torn two ways. Outward-looking is healthy, but we (and he) have a responsibility to order ourselves rightly. Can't be either/or.
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Hester Grace Fisher, born yesterday (Easter Monday) at 3.30pm, 7lb 5oz. Mother and baby both well. Hester is the smaller one in the picture.
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In a training session for
#synod
members on how to use our online voting system. It has developed into training on how to use Zoom, email, and indeed, computers. My doubts about online working are redoubled.
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The chair says "we were going to go into breakout rooms now, but that didn't work before, so we are not going to do that."
The Church of England is able to learn from failure and change behaviour after all.
#synod
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Today’s autocorrect fail: ‘See you tomorrow’ (text to parishioner) became ‘Sex you tonight’. Clergy Discipline Measure proceedings pending.
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Mind on the news, I said mass this evening for all responsible for safeguarding in churches, those responsible in
@churchofengland
for engaging with
#iicsa
, & all who have suffered because of the CofE's failures in this matter. It felt quite significant. Thread 1/?
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...and angels on ceilings;
Festal processions and bowings and kneelings;
Fiddleback chasubles tied up with strings...
These are a few of my favourite things.
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I feel this really captures the experience of pastoral encounters in public ministry.
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Giving thanks to God today on the anniversary of my collation as Archdeacon of St Helens & Warrington.
Not perhaps the first year I was expecting. "But he, trembling and astonished, said: Lord, what wilt thou have me do?"
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Christmas greetings to all members of the
#ClergyMaltClub
(Bottle long recycled, but it’s Macleod’s Smokehead.)
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The Fisher family have kept the vigil, and wish everyone a very happy Easter. Alleluia! Christ is risen.
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Hester (2) playing waitressing: ‘What do you want to drink?’
Me, playing along: ‘Apple juice please.’
Hester: ‘No you don’t, you want wine.’
#convicted
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I have taken the Easter lamb out of the freezer. I bought a vast piece when I thought we would be able to have six other people to lunch on Easter Day. So there are some compensations to this lockdown. I will drink their share of the Burgundy too.
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Like a lot of clergy on here, this week I've been reading (devouring, really)
@CottrellStephen
's new book "On Priesthood". Like everyone else I've heard, I'm obviously recommending it. It's humble and humorous, practical and richly catholic.
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It strikes me that if the Lord had wanted to confuse their speech he had only to make them recite together on Zoom, every user with a small and different delay. The promise of the Spirit is therefore ultrafast broadband for all.
Thank you for coming to my TED homily.
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We are done at
#synod
, with everything passed. Let out early. I fear for London with half-holiday-mood Synod members roaming the streets.
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I love this photo because it invokes primal reactions in people. They are the couple everyone wishes they were in high school
They represent the summun of popularity and success
Those who fall short this ideal cannot help but feel the sting of envy
A mirror into your soul
I love this photo because it invokes primal reactions in people. They are the couple everyone wishes they were in high school
They represent the summun of popularity and success
Those who fall short this ideal cannot help but feel the sting of envy
A mirror into your soul
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Rewatching Master & Commander, we reach the (first) dining scene. Partly lockdown talking, partly Lent, but I’m reminded how much I miss a convivial and slightly tipsy dinner with friends.
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My wine merchant emails to say that contactless delivery is available. I'm relieved but also intrigued: do they pour the wine directly into one's mouth? I'm not ruling that out, by the way.
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Hester (3) is now throwing a tantrum, because ‘I want to *go* to church,’ as Mrs Fisher patiently explains that we can’t go to church, we are having church at home like last week.
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Bertie (9) wonders how famous he would have to be to go on
#Strictly
Could he be Archbishop of Canterbury and do it, he wonders?
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Problems with being an Anglo-Catholic with a bad memory:
having to restart prayers several times because "Behold the handmaid of the Lord" is similar "My soul glorifies the Lord" and suddenly I'm saying the Magnificat when I thought I was saying the Angelus.
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So Zoom seems to be working fine today. Which is a pity, to be honest.
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Mrs Fisher’s success today in finding her GCSE certificates may be the first ever use of a National Record of Achievement.
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Now moving on to debate clergy wellbeing. Clergy members of
#synod
will want to be aware that
@KateWharton27
has chocolate buttons.
#actionsnotwords
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Had a new experience of Christian suffering tonight: biting my tongue while receiving the sacrament. As I tasted the blood I thought I was participating in one of those medieval Eucharistic miracles; it turned out I was just visibly and carnally pressing with my teeth.
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Lucy (11) watching Colin Firth in Pride & Prejudice for the first time:
‘Mr Darcy is very like Daddy.’
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At the Archdeacon’s Visitation. Our archdeacon said we weren’t to put on our surplices, so I assumed it was just cassock & gown.
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They are mostly not on Twitter, then.
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Packing for tomorrow’s services. Here’s a glimpse of stocking for you.
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I love the Athanasian Creed, but it isn't perhaps quite as seeker-sensitive as it could be.
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At
#synod
@RevLeahVS
says she still sometimes see herself as a young person. She’s the same age as I am (38). I feel the same sometimes in church contexts, and others still sometimes patronise me as a callow youth. And there’s the problem.
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On Sunday we have "Beauty for Brokenness." It's a favourite of mine but Mrs Fisher thinks I am becoming dangerously left-wing. If you have the same dilemma I offer the following alternative lyrics:
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On my way to the hospital for my gallbladder operation. If you're saying your prayers this morning one would be appreciated.
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In my last parish small midweek services were the principle gateway for new members.
And also, don't underestimate small midweek services where "no one seems to come." You never know who might show up needing prayer.
Cuz like yeah. There were four people there. And God's splendor was still evident. And I needed to see that.
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A new church member lets me know her history of sacramental initiation. Two serious autocorrect fails but there is something deep here.
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Honesty compels me to point out this was in the scene where his proposed solution to Elizabeth Bennett’s feeling unwell is a glass of wine, which may have prompted this comparison.
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Things must be bad when two members of the bishop’s senior staff give me bottles of gin in the same week.
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I should emphasise that although this severed head is labelled ‘Archdeacon Jennifer’ it does not represent her.
Many thanks to
@therealsjpf
for the invitation to preach at Tuebrook St John’s on this Feast of the Beheading of St John the Baptist. Beautiful liturgy, wonderful company, and was presented with an appropriately gruesome ‘treat’ at the end—an emplattered ‘severed head!’
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I feel this could combine well with a half-time parish post.
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I go about my day singing songs from Christmas adverts.
Hester (2): it’s not Christmas, you can sing that when it is Christmas.
Hoist by my own Advent catechesis.
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Fr Adam and
@Feebit
answering questions
@listerjuniors
as part of
#tellservegive
mission. Thanks to
@BpBurnley
for bringing them.
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Christian values in schools are always 'respect' and never 'stubborn orthodoxy' or 'satire'.
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Churchwardens in
@LivDiocese
should be reassured that if tonight's Archdeacons' Visitation runs the same length as the last one, you will be out in time for the
#Strictly
results show.
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I am almost sure Rachel will turn out to be right, which is good. Still, I’m not sure I want to open my archidiaconal inbox this morning.
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It is now almost impossible to get cartridges for the fountain pen I have used for years, so moving over to bottled ink, always resisted before for fiddliness/mess.
Having always been a blue/black man, I have realised there is now a world of crazy inks out there. What to go for?
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Two screens open this morning: one to email a colleague about a sensitive piece of ecclesiastical law, the other sparring with my bishop on Twitter about plans to assassinate one of his own clergy. Is this my life now?
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I also joined a PCC aged *16* because my *mother* invited me, and now *I* am an archdeacon!
@sophoftheyear
I joined a PCC aged 17 because my vicar invited me, now I am an Archdeacon! It was a doorway to a vocational journey.
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Mrs Fisher and Hester (3) (here dressed as the Gruffalo) catching up on the Psalms. Youngest participant in the Summer Reading Challenge
@LivDiocese
? Go to to join in.
#CalledtoRead
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@VicarOfClee
Once, "the Church of England is producing liturgical resources" would have been a promise of good things to come. Now it feels like a threat.
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The appointment of members of the CNC becomes more and more like the election of the doge of Venice. The forty choose the twelve who select the seventy-two who elect the thirty who nominate the six...
#synod
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@WalkerMarcus
The bit that made me doubt was ‘the vows we have framed.’ More likely some personalised ‘we’ve written our own vows’ than framing the same page of Common Worship everyone else uses. Sounds like ++C let them tell each other they loved each other and blessed them. Not a wedding.
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If we do get to the point of having to fill in one of these in the UK, a lot of people are going to regret not keeping up their school French.
This is the declaration we are required to fill out every time we leave the house in France. Will there be something similar in UK? If not, how will confinement be enforced?
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Sadly this is not the archdeacon’s house.
The Bulletin - Rev Canon Simon Fisher to be the next Archdeacon of St Helens and Warrington
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Glorious typo, Bishop.
It was a privilege to conform them: May God bless them richly.
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Possibly most high-church mishap ever: tripped up the sanctuary step because the end of the humeral veil was tangled up with the biretta.
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@FrDidymus
Something that discomforted everyone. He’d be invited to condemn the Home Office and would refuse, would tell his questioners to practice radical welcome themselves, and would remind his disciples that they themselves were seeking asylum and riches in a country not their own.
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I can’t believe I missed
@ClerkofOxford
’s 2020 pre-Christmas reflection. And I wouldn’t want you to miss it now.
Just reading
@ClerkofOxford
's essay from 1st Sunday in Advent, reflecting on this year's lack of holidays, the impossibility of "pressing pause" on life, the origins of Christmas, the emotional impact of the season. A worthwhile ramble on a gray day.
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What’s happening, asks Twitter? What’s happening is that Lucy (10) is reading Bertie (8) a story, which she turns out to be translating out of the Cambridge Latin Course. He is much amused. I wonder whether I have created a monster.
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Clergy looking to come to Liverpool might be interested in this (caveat: my old parish):
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I appreciate what they are trying to do here, but it’s telling that the conference table becomes the communion table, and not the other way round. What if we did our business meetings before the altar?
The bishops’ staff spent three days away last week, sharing in prayer for the diocese and also examining priorities for the year ahead. The table for conversations was also the place for the sharing in the Eucharist.
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The article from
@MadsDavies
is excellent. People from all perspectives should make sure they read it all.
The independent review of "Transforming Wigan" is out:
Strong on hunger, prayer, collegiality
Weaker on inculcating churchgoing
I was priest there to glorious old pit communities with little money.
We made mistakes but the status quo had to change. I pray good lessons are learned
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Remember, you don't need your polling card to vote, just evidence that you possess a freehold worth at least 40 shillings.
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Well, here we are again, again. At 11am I will offer a mass (in private), in particular for the archdeaconry of St Helens & Warrington & for the deanery of Wigan, and for all unable to attend public worship.
Prayer requests welcome.
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Disadvantages of large clergy family: greater chance of infecting one another.
Advantages of large clergy family: no need for possible scruples about gathering two or three communicants for domestic mass.
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At
#synod
@KateWharton27
reminds us that there is incredible kingdom ministry, and life, and hope, happening in estates churches.
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Due to clash of children's activities, I took Bertie (5) to church this evening. Since he can't read, the office is inaccessible to him. But he can sing the Latin Salve Regina well enough.
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If this whole project was just a setup for this pun, then all is forgiven. I can’t wait for some cathedral to do ‘Jacob sojourned in the land of Ham.’
A sense of humour was required to truly enter into tonight's closing service
@Nrw_Cathedral
Fortunately there was much in evidence, including from the multitasking Bishop of Lynn, preaching while defying gravity!
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All seems to have gone well with my surgery today. Thanks to all who prayed for me.
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People think I’m one of those Advent fundamentalists, but yesterday we had a Christmas carol service, and this morning I said ‘Happy Christmas’ to a shop assistant.
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