Mrs. Ŵest 🌷
@themrswest
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11,412
Following
11,536
Media
8,535
Statuses
115,186
I like you, but not that way. No DM's!!!!! No DM's!!!! Also available as Be on the lookout for satire.
your neighbor's attic
Joined April 2009
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Pinned Tweet
I'm hoping to find the sweet spot between sarcasm and despair.
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A man in Moscow buys a newspaper, glances at the front page, & throws it away. He does the same thing every day. Eventually, the seller snaps. "Why DO you do that?" "I'm just checking for an obituary" "But obituaries aren't on the front page!" "The one I'm looking for will be."
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This is what Nancy Pelosi said the day Steve Scalise was shot: “On days like today, there are no Democrats or Republicans, only Americans united in our hopes and prayers for the wounded.”
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Have you ever deleted a post because you thought of all the ways it could be misunderstood?
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"The laws allow a baby to be born from his or her mother's womb in the ninth month. It is wrong, it has to change." 👶
#TrumpIsNotWell
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I'm waiting for Republicans to start holding witch trials & hanging women because they've found some law from 1692 is "still on the books".
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You can clearly see Orange Jesus trying not to laugh as these idolaters worship him.
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@RepMTG
Your culture of revenge is not appealing to a majority of voters, who would prefer you focus on doing useful things for Americans.
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Wow. This drugged-out weirdo has 11M followers. How does that happen?
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@freep
Total disrespect and a disgusting srnse of entitlement. Republicans consider themselves above the law.
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It's not my birthday, no one in my family died, I didn't just have a baby or get a new job, I'm not counting how many days I've been sober or tobacco-free, and I'm not at a concert. But if I get just 7 more followers, I'll reach 9000. I follow back all compatible folks.
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I almost spit out my coffee laughing at some maga troll who criticized my profile picture, while it uses a picture of trump as its profile. They are stunningly dumb.
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@wendy_resists
10 yrs ago, Repubs would have been horrified by the idea of an undereducated eastern European nude model with poor English and a dubious visa as a "first lady". What changed? Hm....
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@thehill
Not joking or being sarcastic. If my grandfather said the things Trump says, he'd get an evaluation for dementia, and probably be medicated to alleviate the symptoms.
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@Acyn
There's nothing wrong with asking questions. Does Tucker Carlson have sex with goats? Can he show evidence that he doesn't? Just produce a livestock body cam, why not release that? Just asking.
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trumpies think it's hilarious to mock a speech impediment, but they howl with outrage when someone mentions Sarah's eyes, face, or weight.
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@Tim_Tweeted
"It did not appear she was in fear for her safety" because begging police to stay means a person feels perfectly safe.
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Did you ever know anyone born in the 1800s?
I did. My great-grandmother was born in 1874 and died in 1969.
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@Acyn
Democrats are not, as agroup, hostile to religion. Many are devout. But they actually respect separation of church & state, and are sincere about freedom of religion for all.
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@RepGosar
For stealing classified documents? No, that was your cult leader. For inciting a riot? No, that was your cult leader? For violating the emoluments clause? No, that's you-know-who. For money laundering via his hotels? Your guy.
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Most employers will fire people for submitting a fake resume.
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@newtgingrich
March 31 is not normally Easter. Easter changes its date every year. A real Christian, or a person who can read calendars, would know that. March 31 is National Crayon Day, Eiffel Tower Day, Bunsen Burner Day, Dance Marathon Day, and a dozen more.
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@Joannafersulli
@laurenboebert
She's not a "working American". All she does is tweet & party at rallies outside her district.
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@kangaroos991
Old fat guys pretending they are seven years old again so they can play Army.
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@KimMangone
I just spent a week in Honolulu, where getting into restaurants & other places requires a vaccination card or a negative Covid test. Many also take your temperature at the door. I never saw anyone complain.
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@KMarkNZ11
It's interesting how an ugly fat guy, who was never good looking even when he was young and slim, thinks there is some relevance in criticizing other people's looks.
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@MIGIRLINVA1
@AnnCoulter
Rafael Cruz, like the other Republifascists in Congress, doesn't need Social Security. They get pensions that we pay for even when we can't afford our own retirement.
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@RpsAgainstTrump
It would be an absurd thing to do. In any case, trump couldn't be trusted to keep any kind of pledge,
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@tedcruz
"Yesterday, I told the truth, and unfortunately I need to keep lying to please my master."
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@marcorubio
You efforts failed because your candidates are hideous, and you don't have any policies other than planning revenge and voter suppression.
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@DudeSilicon
I told my husband if he ever heard that tfg died, he should wake me up, no matter what time it was.
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@LanceUSA70
In normal times, the brave man with the skateboard would be universally hailed as a hero for trying to stop a mass murderer.
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@Jim_Jordan
Oh yeh, I hate the way lefties ban books, demand that everyone follow the same religion, encourage the murder of protesters, call the news fake -- oh, wait. That's Republicans. Oops.
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@GOP
The truth is, you guys complain all the time that Dems aren't soft enough on crime. You don't want the theft of government documents investigated, you don't want consequences for the Jan 6 attack, you want to ignore sedition & espionage.
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@ksorbs
Unarmed customers at a drag show did what hundreds of well-armed police in Uvalde couldn't. They stopped the shooter before he could kill more people. Isn't that what matters?
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@IngrahamAngle
Truth instead of phony happy-talk. That's what responsible adults do. Being honest about the challenges, and inspiring us to work together. That's what a leader does.
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My mother, staunchly conservative & a lifelong Republican, taught me that the reason we support public education is that everyone benefits from having an educated population. Today's Republicans will be very unhappy 15-20 years from now when there is no one
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@SenatorLankford
You can practice any religion you like. Someone else's marriage doesn't stop you from doing that. People like you want the right to force your preferences onto others.
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@SpeakerMcCarthy
Suddenly you are concerned about classified documents. Did trump pay you a commission on the ones he sold?
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@SarahHuckabee
Will this prepare kids for their new jobs in sweatshops and cleaning rich people's mansions?
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@Old_SchoolEddie
If the flight crew bailed out, the plane would keep flying... for a while.
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@denisewu
@LeaderMcConnell
Actually, Republicans are in favor of price gouging. They voted no on an anti-gouging bill, meaning they voted yes to gouging.
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@ultragarland
I'm going to start "releasing" random documents from a phantom laptop and claiming that it proves Ivanka and Jared had crooked business deals. Oh, wait....
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@RepAndyBiggsAZ
You don't have the authority to defund anything, you little wannabe dictator. What you really want is not to "address lawlessness" but to support the lawlessness of the mob boss you idolize.
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@lkharter
It is very kind of you to assume he simply misread a teleprompter. Even if that's the case, it seems he's not actually listening to himself or understanding what he reads.
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@davidhogg111
Hating on older voters isn't a good look, David. Many, many people over 65 vote Blue.
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@USAlight3
He probably meant his pre-2016 life, when he was less scrutinized, and doing crime was easier.
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@mmpadellan
I'd love to see how Putin would react to trump's speeches claiming he knows more than the Russian generals, and telling the people he alone can fix their problems and saying he wants to make Russia great again. He would have to avoid windows.
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@RepTroyNehls
You're telling us, instead of helping other people, use your money to show off and be a troll?
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@mikepompeo
Making "winning" the top priority is one reason you guys lose. Try listening to the American people and responding to their concerns with workable solutions.
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@keithedwards
It's interesting how she can't just answer yes or no to a yes or no question.
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@The_LadyAnn
When people make odd comments, I just tilt my head, look seriously at their face, and quietly ask, "Are you okay?"
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Some people like to mock Kimberly Guilfoyle for her appearance, knowing that she was once pretty, and voluntarily did this to herself. When I see her, I feel sad, imagining the painful regret she must feel daily.
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Hubby and I spent nearly a year traveling throughout Europe. During that time, we encountered a lot of public restrooms. It wasn't at all unusual to find a restroom that was intended to be used by both men and women. In many cases, there
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@tedcruz
I didn't know trump was a Democrat. By the way, Rafi, it's the "Democratic" Party, not the "Democrat" Party. But why should we expect you to get it right when you don't even use your own real name?
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@TuckerCarlson
There are still questions about what happens at Tucker's house on Friday nights.
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Right now, all over town, there are people doing things I don't want to do. They are eating foods I don't like, reading books that bore me, watching TV shows I hate, & engaging in sexual activities that don't appeal to me. So what? It's none of my business. We really don't
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trump's theory, supported by Republicans, is that a president NEEDS the power to commit crimes of any kind without facing legal consequences. I don't know who he thinks "the Founders" were -- a crime syndicate?
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@realDonaldTrump
The second coming.... does this mean we can skip impeachment and go straight to crucifixion?
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@SarahHuckabee
Kids working the night shift at the meat packing plant don't have time for Facebook. They might make TikTok videos exposing their working conditions. Is that what worries you?
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@joncoopertweets
It was probably Hunter Biden's laptop, but it could have been a gay pride flag.
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@tedcruz
OMG, one by one, you've taken every crooked thing donald trump has done and turned around and accused the President of doing the same things. you are the Prince of Bizarro World.
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@GOPLeader
I'm so glad that inflation, crime, the border, and grocery prices are no longer problems.
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@FoxNews
Are you now going to preface everyone's name with their age? 61-year-old Herschel Walker says he'd rather be a werewolf than a vampire.
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@CawthornforNC
Set an example, Maddie. Apologize to the Naval Academy, the Paralympics, Bradley Ledford, the Democratic Party, and the Republican Arty.
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@RepBoebert
Apparently you can't read. On the front page of the CDC website, there's an item labeled Healthy Living. They have a lot of information on nutrition and healthy activity.
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@laurenboebert
Would we ever have known about the trump-era spy balloons if not for the hysteria over this one?
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@HawleyMO
The children murdered in Uvalde were from Christian families. I missed your call to classify that as a hate crime.
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@Dee452597
@StephenMoore
Republicans pretend they want to tax the ultrarich, but gave billions in tax cuts to the richest, and now use lies to oppose a bill that will tax the rich.
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@DeniseR4947
Yes. He regularly makes speeches filled with mindless nonsense, but his zombies don't care.
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@mattgaetz
Sure, I guess you could "end war" by not fighting against a country that invades another country. Maybe just let Russia take over all of Europe?
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@GovAbbott
@TxDPS
At least one of the victims was a legal resident of the U,S,, but it doesn't really matter - they were all human beings who didn't deserve this. Two women shielded children with their bodies, doing more to protect children in Texas than you ever have.
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@Carolina4NV
Make a list, please, of which jobs Americans are required to have before their opinions matter.
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@MarshaBlackburn
Your disgusting party has tweeted about Hunter Biden almost daily for months. What was "Big Tech" doing? In the meantime, the trump family's corrupt White House was downplayed and largely ignored.
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@RepNancyMace
@AOC
It is a typical tactic of abusers to try to invalidate someone by telling them, You didn't feel what you felt, what you experienced didn't happen.
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@nathaliejacoby1
Actually, you don't have to finish that sentence. "Do you think Marjorie Taylor Greene lied today" can be asked any day of the week, and the answer will always be the same. YES!
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Bizarrely, a person who is "six weeks pregnant" probably has been pregnant for much less than 6 weeks! Why? The traditional way of counting the weeks defies reality. The count starts from the first day of your last period. So, if your period started August 1 (a day when
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