Brunch Davidians
@the_halfdane
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goodbye young danish women, goodbye danish sky
he/they // 27
Joined December 2010
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Pinned Tweet
Congratulations to my dearest friend,
@blkestnight
, for writing the tweet that will be my first ever like. May you adorn the halls of the ancients (my likes tab) for all eternity, commemorated as only a true god can be.
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i could've killed someone with the speed i turned around at to take this picture
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bro i used to eat these balls so often the people at the ER called me Stomach Pump Boy
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"everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about" i am fighting the minotaur. assist me
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just wanna use my platform to say fuck cops and fuck Israel
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@ingridtereza_
@RodrickWave
@Sadcrib
he literally paid 50% of royalties for this song's use to that same Brazilian musician's estate because he sampled it, not stole it, but go off
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@probablyalissa
she believed he was being helpful when he said there was a mustard stain on her shirt and pointed to it... when she looked down, he... he...
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@contactabrother
like he starts off the story with some kind of emotion in his voice but the way he says "facts" is like you just told him you actually thought the last three star wars movies were fine
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@JDawg99202384
@AwfulReddit
This is a sociopathic take, dude. Have some empathy and put yourself in that situation. A month is not nearly enough to grieve for the losses of two of the most important people in your life.
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you must be suicidal donald trump if you think we're fucking
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bro you have GOT to come to the function. the Vitruvian Man is here and he's gonna do that thing
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love that this chick tract implies that there is proof within the Bible that specifically Stewie from Family Guy is gay
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An order that had us all in the feels! A young child passed
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call or text me whenever you want. come to my house unannounced. ask me to help you with things. my friends are my lifeblood and you have an open invitation to me, end of story
I can’t stand the overwhelmingly millennial cultural voice that says, “don’t just show up at my house for a visit don’t call me on the phone don’t ask me to drive you to the airport or help you move” you murdered community spirit & then started talking about a loneliness epidemic
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@canadiEmma
pretty sure it's when my brain kinda turned on, those memories are crystallized as fuck
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@TolarianCollege
Absolutely disgusting on the university. Shouldn't we all need entitled to realistic access to knowledge? Good on you for sticking to your guns, Prof.
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replying "Ok" to tweets is one of my favorite bits. i don't even know what i mean by it
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@s1vh
@randallretail
@SmashyNick
@AggroCrabGames
I don't hate things I don't understand, and I'm certainly not too lazy to research. I hate things that cause climate change, like your dumbfuck NFTs. Next
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I'M LIKING TWEETS!
It’s finally time! After a 13-year bit in the making, I have decided to end my like-celibacy. You’re reading this right: I will begin liking tweets. But to commemorate such an occasion, my FIRST EVER liked tweet must be a real ripper. That’s where you come in.
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saw this at the grocery store and i need everybody's gut reaction on this.
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@Kernelernel
@disclosetv
Don't be sad, I'm sure hell has a nice warm lava bath waiting for him for all eternity :-)
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the ravenous celestial beast is beginning the process of swallowing the sun
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@RoborosewaterM
I kinda love the flavor of this. Research being your top card of your library always revealed, always looking ahead, then you've got the fruits of your research after the vial is smashed: an indestructible jellyfish. Just what I've always wanted! Expensive, though. 5/10.
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great harm should befall people who like the front bottoms
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i'm gonna be so serious for a second. Dune 2 was one of the greatest movies i have ever seen
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@RoborosewaterM
Kicking is one of the most direct keywords in all of Magic: when this card comes into play, you may physically kick your opponent X times, where X is the kicking value. I personally know that this card has been responsible for a few LGS deaths. 8/10
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happy valentine's day. a grenade has just been thrown through your window
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@RoborosewaterM
Comet counters, Ewiny tribal, non-ratic synergies; what doesn't this card have?! I'm sick of all these ratic-heavy, Ewiny-hosing decks that care far too little for astronomy. I'm glad we have an answer, and in Gruul no less. This is the best card in the game. 2/10.
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@PatrickLoller
Nah, actually the tens of thousands of lives lost, the decades wasted and the trillions of dollars that could've gone to much better use elsewhere is pretty objectively bad. Try again though!
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practicing the laugh from feel good inc and showing it off to the girl that works at gamestop
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beyond cursed
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no joke a dr pepper fixes shit at least like 60% of the time
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documented here: the first time in three thousand years i don't feel fat
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@RoborosewaterM
Turn your EDH games into a Cold War simulator, threatening mutually-assured destruction on your pod if political negotiations don't go your way! In theme with a nuke, it also can be used for energy, I guess. This is such a fun one. 9/10.
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this big cheese just threatened to kill everyone in this waffle house
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tried doing a donald trump dune tiktok but i gave up so here's the outtake
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@BadHippa
@BadLegalTakes
"Yeah, y'know, you're right, Your Honor. My legal counsel and I both agree I did kinda earn this, we can go ahead with the dying thing."
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they/them pussy strikes again
BREAKING: House explodes when police approach Arlington, VA home to execute search warrant
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me after one serving of fried rice
As one of the most influential men on the face of the planet
It is important for the good of humanity that I live as long as possible
At my current strength levels, I estimate to survive for at least 5000 more years
With this in mind, I take my medical care extremely seriously
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how the fuck are you people still using facebook especially after AI brainrot has set in. every single comment is "happy birthday rosa"
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me drinking the elixir of foresight (i am forever plagued by the visions)
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one time this girl i was talking to was like "i am obsessed with Mac Miller" and but i got him and Mac DeMarco mixed up so initially i was like "fuck yeah dude." when i realized my mistake i listened to Mac Miller and he fucking sucked so i stopped talking to her
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my male hubris doesn't tell me i can kill a bear with my hands or whatever but i could definitely do Hot Ones without flinching
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not Enkidu being seduced into civilization by a sacred prostitute so he can assist me in my quest to slay Humbaba 😂
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it's still valentine's day guys... just saying.... there's plenty of time left.......... for valentine's...... in case anyone wants to be mine........ just saying........
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@bananapuff777
@AGoldmund
@youngtiddy
damn don't write any essays when you're high, you might plagiarize those too
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just saw a nonbinary person named Fish on hinge i am DONE!!!!!! I'M FINISHED WITH THIS!!!!!!!
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