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john sturgis Profile
john sturgis

@sturgios

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Journalist, editor, copywriter, ghost. Centrist dad takes on media, books, food, wine, nature, London, West Ham

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Joined October 2008
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 months
Sian got one of those texts from an unrecognised number purportedly from our oldest son who had lost his phone. But because he is overseas in the wilds she was concerned it could just be true. So she asked him to name his cat. Fair play to the scammer for having a punt:
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
Just read the phrase "the older generation born between 1981 and 1996" and now I need a lie down
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 months
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@PolitlcsUK
Politics UK
3 months
🚨 NEW: Keir Starmer has asked officials to pass him notes updating him about the England vs Netherlands semi-final during the NATO summit Phones are taken off them due to security reasons [ @guardian ]
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
The cover image of the Harry book looks like a scientific reconstruction of the face of a neolithic hunter found remarkably well preserved in a peat bog
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 months
Next cat is definitely going to be named Mittens
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 months
This has strong "Get Your £9.50 Holidays - only in The Sun...start collecting your tokens today" vibes
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 months
In just six years we have moved from “spend a year of your degree course studying at a continental university” to “when you finish your A levels go and spend a year living in barracks in the Brecon Beacons learning how to storm a machine gun turret”. Well done everyone.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 months
Let the druids decide the sentences
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
Proof yet again of how Oxbridge graduates will slip a reference to where they studied into any context
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 months
"It's actually 'Sorted....'See It, Say It, *Sorted*' ....yes a lot of people thing it's 'Sort It'...I know it does sound like that. Yes."
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
One of the best headlines I ever wrote
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
If someone isn’t already drafting a comedy based on the 60 drinkers forced into a 72 hour pub lock in with no electricity but an Oasis tribute band by snow in the Yorkshire Dales - provisionally entitled Snow-asis - then I’ll fear for the future of the British film industry
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 months
Portrait of the artist as a young road man
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 years
"Upset you didn't get what you needed in your A'levels? I only got a B in Art and a D in Geography...but I've just bought a $10m mansion in California"
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
"I was only obeying orders"
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
"...and he said 'I'd like to Interview Vladimir Putin about his childhood trauma'..."
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 months
Her daughter sounds like a firm of corporate lawyers with offices in London, Geneva and New York
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@sturgios
john sturgis
8 months
Affray Bentos
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
Chelsea Women’s scorers last night sound like an especially heated passage from an Edwardian bodice ripper
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@sturgios
john sturgis
8 months
Gregg Wallace’s local Harvester this morning
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 months
In 2019 you had to do some hasty arse covering when it emerged you’d been paid to write for The Sun yourself
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 months
@tobyharnden "Bin Laden is dead - but romance isn't"
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
If you type “sick of the” into Google the top suggestion is “Sussexes”
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
Number two son refusing to go to school this morning. It’s like arguing with Elizabeth Barrett Browning
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
The escalator at Southgate tube station- which turns 90 this month. The closest thing in London to a Fritz Lang set.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 months
Amazing Paul McCartney fact
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
I’m getting the Piccadilly Line ten stops into town not walking solo across Death Valley
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 years
My mum after her covid jab this morning accidentally makes a classic joke.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
The Times pulls out the greatest description of a hangover ever written
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
When you think it’s finally over and then they start singing yet another hymn
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 months
News from a senior Whitehall civil service source: the general election is now being routinely referred to as 'the Jenny Lec'
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
The official Prince George birthday portrait makes him look like he’s modelling smart casual leisurewear for fiftysomethings in the Weekend supplement of the Daily Telegraph
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 years
@FionaSturges @rosstmiller Almost without fail when a horse appears in a film my wife tells me it's the wrong kind of horse - "That's an Andalusian, they wouldn't have had those" etc
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@sturgios
john sturgis
9 months
Magical encounter with an albino deer in woods in Sussex this morning - a white hart. Only the second time I’ve ever seen one. Only downer is that one of their folkloric symbolic associations is of imminent death. [picture from Google - I watched it rather than trying to snap]
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 months
“Bless you”
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@sturgios
john sturgis
7 years
Bannon looks like John Torode after the BBC don’t recommission Masterchef, Lisa Faulkener leaves him and he hits the cooking sherry hard.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
Before the ballet tonight they played the Ukrainian national anthem 🇺🇦
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
Absolutely brutal - in tomorrow’s Times magazine. (Read to the punchline)
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@sturgios
john sturgis
6 months
Outside a country pub and an old boy just reversed his Jag into the wall of the carpark in an audible prang. As it happened everyone in the beer garden simultaneously made this low oooh noise. It was very British
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
The Essex Christmas hunt meet is always a riot of fake tan, mascara and tweed. But this little chap was the undisputed best dressed of the day.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
@HarrietSergeant Good for him. That’s cheered me right up.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
Brilliant old hack story in the Guardian obit - [Michael] Parkinson’s Bequest
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@sturgios
john sturgis
11 months
The book I’m reading is physically falling apart. This week I travelled by tube across London and didn’t realise until I arrived that the cover had been on upside down the whole time -so that i appeared to be a lunatic pretending intently to be reading a book
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
Friend’s wife had emergency surgery Friday. He rang for a condition check last night and they told him: “I’m afraid she is no longer with us…” His knees gave way and he gasped. “…She was transferred onto a ward ten minutes ago.”
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@sturgios
john sturgis
7 years
Reason I canceled my trip to Asda Southgate is that I am not a big fan of the store manager having stopped perhaps the best and finest deal on white wine in London, their Picpoul de Pinet for “peanuts” £5.35 only to put it up to £6.97. Bad deal. Wanted me to keep buying - NO!
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
Visiting my mum, 84, and discover in chatting she’s just been scammed- in a phoney Royal Mail excess payment thing. She fell for it because she’d sent her grandson a book for his birthday. And now she’s all shaken and her confidence shot. What utter bastards these people are.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
The discourse has shifted from ‘classic Dom’ to ‘classic Non Dom’
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@sturgios
john sturgis
7 months
Gabriel García Márquez looks like a dirty old man watching Barbara Windsor exercise outdoors in a skimpy outfit in a late period Carry On
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@sturgios
john sturgis
6 years
The classic wrong assumption by people who have never actually done journalism - that news organisations stockpile stories in filing cabinets ready to bring out when they're most timely, rather than existing in a constant hand-to-mouth desperate struggle to find new news.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
7 years
Fabio and Grooverider are gearing up to celebrate 29 years since the second summer of love and the birth of acid house and rave culture.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 months
The editor of Byline here defending the integrity of online discourse and protecting the electoral process from the menace of fake accounts - by retweeting RS Archer
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
It sounds like Canvey Island
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@sturgios
john sturgis
6 months
I apologise in advance for this - and it may just be me - but at first glance at this my impression was momentarily that he was receiving pleasure of an oral rather than literary nature:
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
@gralefrit @MooseAllain So - if here was some apex predator targeting my dog, he might stop deliberately rolling in fox shit?
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 years
Friday I'm in gloves
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@sturgios
john sturgis
6 months
@JAHeale "Things had not worked out as I had hoped" goes straight into the political understatement hall of fame where it sits with Emperor Hirohito after Hiroshima and Nagasaki: "The war situation has developed not necessarily to Japan's advantage…”
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
@sonofaelfred Hell’s Angles
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 months
The number of supposedly informed people making this assertion this morning is astonishing. The Mail has 'law and order' in its DNA. The idea that because it also opposes mass migration it somehow endorses skinheads setting fire to libraries is preposterous
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 years
Not so sure about the new Narnia book tbh.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 months
Fabulous French-to-English translation work
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 months
Iris Murdoch describes a pint and a sandwich in a Wiltshire country pub in circa 1955
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@sturgios
john sturgis
9 months
Somewhere out there, Britain's one actually bent, thieving sub postmaster is reeling in incredulity at his good fortune
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
Getting a clever headline on a tiny nib is a neglected art form
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 months
This anecdote could only be less credible if Santa appeared dressed as Colonel Sanders
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
Thanks for all the many people who shared my distress message- just found Tammy unharmed thanks to a chap who rang council after seeing her looking lost. Massive relief.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 years
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
Sorted for ewes and whizz
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 months
My TS Eliot story - handed down as an oral history
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 years
This is our generation’s Saigon ‘75.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 months
Swung by for my annual homage to London’s most magnificent wisteria- and interrupted a bridal wear fashion shoot. Bedford Gardens between Notting Hill and High Street Ken
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 month
🎵🎶 I beg your pardon I lit a ciggie in a beer garden 🎵🎶
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@sturgios
john sturgis
6 years
@TheMichaelMoran He made a clean getaway.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
7 years
"....and I'd like a tree fern area there to soften the lines of the decking - with maybe some fritillaries or campanula underneath...."
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
They must be absolutely gutted
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
Top tip: no matter how troublesome you are finding it with your fingers, never open a cat food sachet with your teeth
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
So we are staying in an AirBnb yurt tonight and this - I absolutely kid you not - is the bathroom. Good thing we’re not on a first date.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
Solid headline work in this morning’s Mail
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
"William broke my necklace"
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
@BonnieTOfficial @worgztheowl It must happen every now and then....
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
Lunch at Wiltons - decidedly old school - Stilton soufflé, mixed grill and petits fours
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@sturgios
john sturgis
5 months
Visit to the church at Tudely, near Tonbridge, to see the Marc Chagall windows - perfect when the sun is out
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
When the sign says ‘beer garden to rear’ I don’t hold out high hopes. For once I was wrong.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
10 months
Andy Burnham looks like the bus he’s on is being driven by Keanu Reeves at 90mph
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 years
Just met these two in the park and inquired after the unusual lead arrangement. Turns out Frankie, left, is almost completely blind, and Ezra, right, is happy to guide him at his own pace so he can still enjoy free walks.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
8 months
With my mum, 86, at the ROH last night for Tosca. Approaching 30 years of pretty much monthly theatre trips together…
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
Sad news: I gather legendary Sun chief reporter John Kay has died. Anyone who ever met him will remember an extraordinary and expansive character who was warmly supportive of countless younger hacks. And of course a terrific journalist who broke many big stories over many years.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
It may be overshadowed by events ten miles south but today is the 90th birthday of London's finest tube station: Arnos Grove, seen here at 630 this morning…
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
The most extraordinary paragraph I have read so far this year-
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@sturgios
john sturgis
6 months
The OJ Simspon funeral cortege will be led by a Ford Bronco driving sedately along the 91 Freeway pursued by 500 LAPD squad cars
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
When you go into a busy pub and every single table is occupied but you manage to find two unused stools and put them together in the corner by the corridor to the toilets then have nowhere to put your drinks except on the floor
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
Features editors: it’s time to move the reporters you have camping out in the lying-in-state queue and get them booked into Centre Parcs for the bank holiday weekend.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
4 years
Me: if there were a God could He not, in Easter week especially, give us some sign. Asda:
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@sturgios
john sturgis
1 year
The Steve Hilton story in the review of the Rory Stewart book in The Times- amazing
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
Got married 25 years ago today- I won’t do a PDA, not least because Mrs S rarely ventures on here - but this is my favourite picture from that day. The bride smoked Marlboro Light.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
Eldest had an evidently lively night which involved her coming home at 430am without keys and phoning more than once to secure entry. Given that, in her heyday, this was not an unknown occurrence for her too, I noted a perhaps surprising intolerance from her mother at this drama
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@sturgios
john sturgis
3 years
Charles (whispering): “Is he still doing it?” Aide: “I’m afraid he is, Sir”
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@sturgios
john sturgis
9 months
Greater love hath no man than he who lays down naked for a photoshoot to support his wife’s feature writing ambitions
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@sturgios
john sturgis
6 years
Jesus, the decline in the quality of entries at the UK air guitar championships is truly shocking.
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@sturgios
john sturgis
2 years
I wish she’d spoken about this to me privately before she went to the media
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