Ajay Mitchell Enjoyer
@sthsthburner
Followers
3K
Following
100K
Media
7K
Statuses
123K
Lemme go and check on these goddamn garbanzo beans
Joined January 2021
"They ain't believe in me" gimmick from a guy who was playing CL footy at 18, aight.
🗣️ Jude Bellingham tearing up: "You go through life with so many people telling you that you can't do things. Nights like this makes you realize that you're alright."
15
553
13K
You're trying to give thanks to the good Lord for gifting you with a goal on Easter, meanwhile your teammate is telling a bunch of people in wheelchairs to shut up.
37
907
12K
He's like the Joao Felix of defenders.
103
719
9K
City fans pretending they've declined is too funny.
26
282
8K
I remember the days when one simply said "our home record isn't good".
Camp nou is a brothel in Europe. Everyone comes to nut in our ass.
20
841
7K
A video comes out of him saying the n word and we immediately go in for him.But I was told the new owners don't understand what it means to be Chelsea. .
🚨 EXCLUSIVE: Chelsea board now in Poland trying to reach verbal agreement with Shakhtar for Mudryk and hijack the deal! Official bid ready close to €100m. 🔵 #CFC. Arsenal always been leading the race, in talks with Shakhtar after 3d official bid. Mudryk position, now crucial.
45
888
7K
Idt I've ever watched a footballer develop their decision making this quick before, this isn't the same guy I saw dribbling into bodies and giving a defender a concussion just a few months back.Making quicker simpler decisions, keeping the ball moving and still being direct.
71
199
5K
See the difference in head shapes, Pep's is smooth and rounded whike Ten Hag's is jagged and irregular.Players respond to these things.
55
900
5K
6'1 striker with Pnp and intelligent movement who can dribble like a winger and escape pressure like a midfielder. How is he not the best itw.
108
327
5K
Poch is kiIIing me, he saw Caicedo outnumbered in midfield and his response was to sub him off and make sure Enzo was outnumbered in midfield instead.
70
677
4K
Will never look right until the Chels are on top, I fear.
9
319
4K
They were annoyed that a 35 year old wasn't acting like a father figure to a bunch of grown men in their 20s/30s, I'm in actual tears.
4
152
4K
Say what you will about this fanbase, they always do an incredible job of hyping players who don't play for us.
Isak 😉.
38
317
4K
Italians are so insane man, before I started following Serie A I didn't even know white Europeans could racially abuse each other ffs.
Looks as if Dusan Vlahovic is being racially abused by some Atalanta fans. He scored, silenced them but it didn't seem as if that stopped those La Dea fans. Leonardo Bonucci was fuming.
20
580
4K
Thank you Declan Rice ❤️.
1
90
4K
The one progressive pass being the misplaced one has finished me.
Declan Rice completed more passes than any other player in the first half vs. Serbia (46). He only misplaced one of them. 🍚. #EURO2024
14
287
4K
Cobham is so funny man, we somehow produced a guy who dribbles like Musiala, crosses like Reece and looks like Mctominay.
15
323
3K
Everytime a Chelsea fan says "hear me out" I get an ear infection.
10
233
3K
Newly promoted team doing "keeper is the deepest playmaker" gimmick. Is this what my sport has become?.
32
425
3K
Every time I get close to taking him for granted I try to remember what the non Reece minutes used to look like.
15
139
3K
Raul Jimenez is playing against a CB pairing of Phil Jones and Raphael Varane and he's *actively* targeting Varane, this is hilarious.
10
217
3K
Just clocked our second goal came from Isak trying to move like Nico at the halfway line, know your role lil bro.
6
202
3K
A 9 who's as comfortable with his back to goal as he is facing it, can perform whether he's isolated or linking with teammates, will sprint in behind or drop deep to receive to feet and has all the physicality and nastiness you'd want.Fucking incredible player.
39
311
3K
Skskksks have some goddamn shame!!!
7
159
2K
The way they keep bullying him into doing this is so fucking funny.Like your mother dragging you out to perform for guests ffs "do that song you learned at school".
19
118
3K
🎶.He was a sk8r boi.They said "see you later boy".🎶.
15
82
2K
Miss prime CityPool games, was like crack cocaine in football form.
18
174
2K
This is fake, the real Noni would've said "Calm".
4
84
2K
Nico outdid this with no Europe.
5
72
2K
Wow it's been long enough that we can run revisionism on his performance in that world cup, fairs fairs.
10
106
2K
Rangnick going from Lokomotiv to United to the Austrian NT in the span of 12 months.
10
278
2K
Look at these gigantic human beings ffs I GOT MY CHELSEA BACK.
6
90
2K
I genuinely don't think I've ever felt as gaslit by any player in football as I have with Bellingham.Everytime I watch him I, feel like I see one thing but then I come on here and the way people talk about him make me doubt my own two eyes sksksk.
Jude Bellingham’s display against Chelsea showed why money is not everything. @RichJolly .
22
247
1K
He's running off homoerotic love for Messi and pure racismo rn, everytime he sees Upa his stamina bar fills up.
rdp’s legs might go into muscle failure.
10
219
1K
Still can't get over how funny it is that Tuchel froze Tammy out 2 weeks into the job before deciding to sign a washed Auba two years later because we lack goals.
25
129
1K
Badi kills me man, he said ain't shit funny ffs.
9
63
1K
"good form" gimmick when every game is a fight for my mental stability, OK.
35 - Since Boxing Day 2023, only three teams have picked up more points than Chelsea (35) in the Premier League (Man City, Arsenal and Liverpool). Developing.
8
118
1K
Dfkm this is like when they do flashbacks in a movie to show you the main character was in the background of every important event ever.
2
237
1K
Much as you lot won't want to heat it, this shit won't work without Nico.You want Nkunku drifting around the pitch free of holdup responsibilities, go rewatch the first half and see how much dirt work Nico went through.Ironically enough could've had an assist to Nkunku.
21
106
1K
Man did a bicycle kick clearance after an hour just to feel something 😭😭😭.
Thiago Silva playing with a Cigar in his mouth for 90mins lol the prem allegations ain’t sticking dawg.
9
96
999
My favourite thing is following fans of a club I don't follow closely and finding out about all the little subplots.Like who knew Bayern fans had beef with Goretzka lol.
6
42
996
The mental fortitude Nico has had to be able to get through the shit this useless fanbase hurls his way is almost the main reason I love him now.From matchgoing fans booing him last year to pundits to social media fans, idk how he's held up so well.
17
93
1K
Discourse around him from people who don't watch us pisses me off. Been so good for a few months now.
Moises Caicedo vs Leeds.
4
69
1K
You can understand why people fall in love with the idea of him at first but then you follow him for a couple of years and realize the idea and reality don't quite link.
17
29
981
Going from "Chelsea will need to sell academy yoof for FFP" to banking almost 100m off Havertz and Kova alone is kinda funny.
11
123
929
He feels like one of those FBs who can end up carrying an entire flank by himself like Reece, Phonzie, Nuno etc.
Alejandro Balde - 22/23 the breakthrough.
29
33
907
Will never get why we just had a free run at him.
16
26
922
Goals are a v funny thing, this doesn't crack his top 15 performances with us.I'll take the gas still tho.
5
37
930
2 xG with 12 injuries and a red card + Jovacic in the 2nd half, Graham Potter you are generational. .
Fulham (0.71) 2-1 (2.18) Chelsea.
15
95
873
"London has two Champions Leagues and four Europa Leagues"
London has two Champions League’s and four Europa Leagues (or equivalent), Paris’ best is a Cup Winners Cup, Berlin’s best is a semi final in the UEFA Cup and Rome has a Conference League, Fairs Cup and Cups Winners Cup.
5
77
868
As always, the worst part about Chelsea being in a bad way is I have to see non-Chelsea fan's opinions on Chelsea.
13
87
911
“Wow they spent £1.5bn on that”. “£1.5bn and that’s the bench they have”. “£1.5bn and no T4 race”. “£1.5bn and nowhere near a title challenge”. “You’ve spent £1.5bn and still got 40 players”. “You’ve spent £1.5bn you are in a title race”. Look at the narrative turning 👀🤣.
0
69
896
Genuine question, who said Haaland (former RB Salzburg striker) doesn't press?.
"Haaland doesn't press". Final Third Pressures by players in the 2022-23 Premier League:. Erling Haaland: 73.Pascal Gro��: 70.Danny Welbeck: 68.Brenden Aaronson: 65.Jamie Vardy: 62.Aleksandar Mitrovic: 61.Jarrod Bowen: 60.Michail Antonio: 59.Ollie Watkins: 52.Kai Havertz: 52.
13
28
795
You guys remember that season our top scorer was a DM with 7 penalties?
3
29
829
I can't explain how much this clip has finished me ffs.Lawful good and chaotic evil.
0
2
729
He's given us a 20 G/a season at age 22 and is on course to drop another, if that's not reliable (esp next to a guy who gives us 30 G/A) then idk what you're looking for.
Nicolas Jackson can't be relied on long term.
5
59
748
I've never seen a "who want me" sesh as disgraceful as what 7 has had this summer.Even Malang Sarr had multiple offers ffs.
3
75
704
Why does every Brazilian winger swear they're actually a 10.Just put my take-ons in the bag bossman.
Estêvão Willian's agent, Andre Cury:. "He adapts to any style of play. #Chelsea is a club that sees Estevão playing as a number 10, and that is important. He can develop even more playing in the middle.". [via @UOLEsporte]
7
72
738
Floor raising ballers at midtable clubs are the lifeblood of the sport.Where would we be without guys like Zaha, Blas and Berardi.
23
44
705
The secret is to just keep scrolling Twitter until the commentator yells.
this was only fun for 20 minutes.
1
66
659
If you want to learn about something, you study the best.I wanted to learn about striker movement and there's really noone better to learn about it from than Edinson Cavani, my piece on El Matador's offball movement is now LIVE!! .
18
149
663
He'll never be the pacy winger that can beat everyone from a standing start but BOY he can make a good attack keep ticking.Ik it sounds boring but just being able to always make the right decision (esp with his tech) is so so valuable when you already have gamechangers in attack.
14
43
688
The young generation of 9s have made my eyes bleed this tourney ffs Hojlund, Sesko, Broja, Vlahovic you all need God.
14
130
641
Mudryk first 30 minutes were incr but it feels like the amount of defensive work he had to get through + the first subs cooked his impact on the game.Next step for him is extending performances like that over a full performance but overall another step in the right direction.
12
45
631
Nah England are hilarious man, they've got a midfield composed of a striker, a rb and a CB.
3
91
633
Nicolas Jackson been memed, mocked and degraded by rival fans and Chelsea fans alike and he has 14 goals and 5 assists in the league alone. "Worst striker in the league" suck my asshole, respectfully.
6
108
624
Nicolas Jackson get your boots, we're making some movies in Estonia next season.
3
58
608
Most annoying thing about Havertz is despite me seeing him be mediocre at best for the past 3 seasons, there's still a part of my brain going "what if next year is finally his year".Such an infuriating thing, never had it with any other player.
16
65
576
Never underestimate the value of a striker who can scam you a final 3rd entry out of nothing.There's a reason Didi was so impactful and it wasn't just the big goals in big games.
7
49
607
This is just a sliver of why I hate the Chelsea fanbase bc coming into the summer, idt 80% of these guys had RW as even a top 5 positional need.But now transfer dopamine has hit and they just want anything to fill the hole.
18
54
587
"PL winning strikers" are a myth.Imagine telling someone in 2016 that teams with guys like Bernardo and Firmino up top would win titles.
Nketiah is not a PL-winning striker.
4
42
560
League's gotten so easy they have to invent struggles now, fair enough man.
1
6
530
Chelsea fans will create a problem in their head for no reason, just pure bad vibes for the sake of it.
genuinely doesn’t feel right that Palmer isn’t playing CL football next season . one more season of it and he considers his way out you reckon?.
5
63
569
Where I come from, a striker missing chances then scoring anyway is considered a good thing.Suarez used to be praised for that exact gimmick.
Sums up Jackson, consistently inconsistent.
2
74
583
We've gotta start calling Brennan Johnson by his initials BJ because omg this guy SUCKS.
15
119
554
Nah I was genuinely super worried Enzom was a fucking nerd who would force the players to stick to their zones but he seems to be willing to give them some leeway positionally, really like that.Ofc have to give it a few months to make sure it's not Poch muscle memory.
26
18
535
Thiago Silva might be the best ballplaying CB I've ever had the priveledge of watching.
6
27
504
Not to be #thatguy but he's not getting that off in the Prem, Serie A CBs are just not particularly physical in general.Seen what his back to goal game looks like v more physical CBs and it usually isn't pretty.
Sign him immediately what the hell did I just watch
94
54
499
Just watch Kobbie Mainoo. I think the only relevant stat that gets registered here is a SCA but his fingerprints are all over the entire buildup, THIS is a connector
Watching Kobbie move United up the pitch almost single-handedly but knowing it doesn't matter bc it doesn't show up on his crab graphs.
4
95
522
Common theme in these four games, anyone know what it is?
62
71
480
Cole Jermaine Palmer the superstar that you are.
Anyone remember on media day when they asked Palmer to do a cele for when he scores a hattrick and he asked "what about four"?.
2
121
519
Ball carrying midfielders used to be my favourite profile of player but I'm starting to get a deep seated hatred for them now. Release the ball quick? No hermano, lemme take 4 touches into a crowd first.
19
36
489
This from a guy in his first PL season with like 60 senior appearances total.I've supported this club long enough to know what a shit striker looks like and he's not that.
Nicolas Jackson is matching or exceeding all his metrics from last season, while playing in a more difficult league and still learning how to play striker. Don't write him off.
11
57
486
He's once again introducing me to a vibe (playing football) that I'm scared he cannot maintain.
4
19
472
Disasi and Nico might be two of the sickest people I've ever seen play for this club, I'm acc in tears.Imagine going to a game with your kid and a 6'4 215 pound dude tries to crowdsurf on you.
5
30
464
ZERO ball striking tech from your wingers ffs giraffe in the box and you can't even hoof it in.Also have questions about the ox's ground coverage in midfield esp defensive transitions.
21
33
443
The way he lured the press in, I genuinely yelled.His DM partner can't even do that ffs.
John Stones genuinely does Busquets things in midfield.
4
6
431
How easy do you dimwits think it is to score 20 league goals with zero pens lol "world class" Isak hit 21 last season and needed 5 pens to do it. Costa's 20 goal league season was only possible because of 1 pen.
I’d like 20 league goals from Nicolas Jackson in order to not want Osimhen, Isak, Gyokeres etc, I think that’s fair and will show development, he would be the first since Costa to do that it so. He’s made a good start with 5 so far.
8
30
438
0:35 the way he keeps up with every attempt by Nuñez to change speeds is fucking nuts, he's an unreal athlete.
6
36
411
@CFCEnforcer Guy always did his best, wasn't his fault that Reece couldn't stay fit and the previous regime refused to get a proper backup.
1
0
419
Poch when the midfielders complain about having too much ground to cover:
4
83
402
I want all you "Nkunku should start over Jackson" mfs to watch how much he's struggling to hold the ball up rn so you'll understand *exactly* how difficult Nico's job is.
9
62
423
As it stands it looks like Raphinha is headed to Barcelona for about €75m so I figured since I had some clips I'd take a look at his tactical fit in Xavi’s system.As always likes, RTs and constructive criticism is always appreciated, hope you enjoy this.
27
107
405
