Shauny Boy
@shiny02
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Following
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Satire, parody and absolute nonsense. Lots of wigs. Not a jukebox. 'The Lidl of Scottish satire' Support me here -
Scotland
Joined May 2020
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Pinned Tweet
New sketch 👇
CREATIVE SCOTLAND FUNDS A PORNO
(Warning: not for the faint of heart)
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Has anyone tried turning the Scottish Parliament off and on again?
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The Scottish political horror movie you've all been waiting for.
(And it's eco friendly)
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The Scottish creative industries are stacked full of vindictive, petty, petulant gate-keeping middle-class activists who spend a considerable amount of their time EXCLUDING people.
Literature Alliance Scotland seems to be no exception.
We have become aware a resource on our website has been flagged by a number of our followers. It was a document submitted to LAS for review but was deemed unsuitable in its current form and was never Board approved. It was uploaded in error & should have been removed more swiftly
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COGNITIVE DISSONANCE: THE STURGEON YEARS
Ladies and gents, meet Morag 👇😆
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NEW SKETCH 😆
'Scotland's 'radical' artists are a bunch of f**king cowards'
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A genuine question with none of my usual sarcastic abrasiveness:
Do you feel like this period of time we're living in (perhaps the last decade or so) is insane?
Do you feel insane just existing these days?
Because I sure do and it'd be great to know I ain't alone
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Sturgeon and Harvie finally flesh out their case for Scottish Independence....
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The SNP launch the first episode of their 'broadcast' platform 😆
SNP CAST - Episode 1
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The fact that Patrick Harvie think criticisms from twitter wanks is enough for him to dismiss the Cass report should be proof enough he shouldn't be anywhere near government.
The audacity beggars belief.
(also note he has nothing of value to add except mantras and ideological
Patrick Harvie repeatedly refuses to accept the findings of the Cass Review, or even that it's a valid scientific study by a qualified professional, and instead whines that he's been the victim of "hate crimes" in a "culture war".
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Ladies and gentlemen!
It's the training video you didn't know you needed
Pete Wishart's 'How to be an SNP MP' 😂
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Crowdfunder pitch for:
'Nicola Ferguson Sturgeon: The Tartan Messiah'
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Scotland's state broadcaster tests the pulse of the nation
Welcome to Master Debates on BBC SHITELAND 😂
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Oh, I suppose it's an apt time to repunt this little classic, eh?
Patrick Harvie Volunteers at Xmas 😆
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THIS is what having the Scottish Greens in Government got us 👇
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New sketch
How the Scottish Government makes policy 😆
(feat Patrick Harvie and Nicola Sturgeon)
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The local council election campaign video you didn't know you needed
Volume up and bigger it
🎶Ease the squeeze🎶
🎶Ease the squeeze🎶
🎶Ease the squeeze🎶
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Looks like
@edinburghuni
is embarrassing Scotland again.
Well done, lads.
Free and open debate at a university?
Not in Scotland, apparently.
Fucking. Well. Done.
They've done it again. Our film screening is cancelled. They have occupied the venue. Freedom of assembly for women is dead at Edinburgh University. Anyone who is appalled by this please come down to protest.
@ScotNational
@BBCScotlandNews
@TheScotsman
@Channel4News
@thetimes
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Surely, the first time this Hate Crime legislation is used in a malicious manner (inevitable really) has to be the end of Humza Yousaf, right?
The first time someone's life is ruined because of this then Humza has to resign with immediate effect.
Anything less...
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New sketch! 👇
House of Cairds: THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF HUMZA
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I mean where do you start?
Okay. Here goes (fml).
1st - this lot absolutely ignored (screechingly, I'll add) all of the sensible amendments which would have made a UK S35 very unlikely.
2nd - the parliament that voted for this was whipped (SLAB/SNP/Greens)
Trans rights are human rights. It is right for
@scotgov
to challenge the UK gov. We must fight for equality and our democracy.
We voted overwhelmingly for Gender Recognition Reform. We cannot allow the lives of trans people to be used as a pawn in Westminster’s culture war.
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I see Gerry Hassan is having his Damascene moment 😂
Gerry, only a few days ago:
'EVERYTHING IS FINE. THE SNP ARE AMAZING. NICOLA IS BRILL AND HUMZA IS EVEN BRILLER!'
Gerry, now:
'I'm here to inform you that all is not well within the SNP, as I have long warned!'
Muppet
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Let's put this to the test, eh? 👇
This is the Scottish Greens in government
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Mike is talking about me here (but obviously won't say it)
'Monetising hatred'
Absolutely go fuck yourself Mike
Good read from
@NeilMackay
on the appalling abuse of Parick Harvie. Useful reading especially if your monetising hatred of him via sketches and dire 'satire'
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While I'm taking a flamethrower to the world:
Disabled people can't self-identify out of their fucking disabilities.
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So Sturgeon and Murrell are already rigging the election of Sturgeon's successor?
Don't ever let any of these people, or their supporters, spout off about 'democracy' and 'accountability' ever again.
The cognitive dissonance in this country should have its own fucking orchestra
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If I get the jail then that's the end of classics like this wee horror movie belter 👇
SCOTTISH GREENS: IN THE SCHEME 😱
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Well I make that 5 years of me being sober
What an absolute riot it has been
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How did I miss this?
Humza's response to whether Peter Murrell should go
Jesus my skin is CRAWLING 😱
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So we have a new FM, huh?
'House of Cairds: The Special Advisors Leadership MELTDOWN' 😂
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The people who've spent the last five years screaming 'EVERYTHING IS FINE! SHE HAS A PLAN!' while they wore a blindfold and rammed SNP-branded cotton wool into their ear canals daily.
Oh, NOW you think there's a problem?
Get to absolute fuck
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The Scot Gov could announce they're ditching electric cars, all renewable energy projects and are reinvesting everything in coal power plants and STILL Patrick Harvie wouldn't fucking resign.
The man's principles are the same as his green credentials: non-existent
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When you apply for CREATIVE SCOTLAND's 'working class' art fund
😭😭😭
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A few days ago Humza called anyone questioning the transparency of the leadership contest 'conspiracy theorists' and tinfoil-hat nutjobs.
Now Humza's campaign is demanding transparency from those running the leadership contest.
What a wanker
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Creative Scotland is a Gentrified Mafia
(feat Angus Robertson's face)
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Is it any wonder huge swathes of working-class creatives in this country feel like they have nowhere to go?
I take the piss out of this stuff but if I'm honest I don't find it funny in the slightest.
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Patrick Harvie volunteers at Xmas
'I AM PATRICK HARVIE, HE/HIM. I OWN POLICE SCOTLAND!' 💅
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Well it's been nice to wake up to an outpouring of appreciation for what I've been up to these last few months (by myself, with hee haw).
Scotland's arts and cultural sector should be fucking ashamed.
(They won't be though, they're never wrong).
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Remember the sheer joy in 2015 of seeing Scottish Labour troughers like Jim Murphy, Frances Curran, Ian Davidson, Tom Clarke, Anas Sarwar & Douglas Alexander lose their seats?
Expect the same but directed towards the SNP in 2024
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(Probably time to chuck this Scottish Government sketch back out there)
HOUSE OF CAIRDS: Putting it on Expenses 💅
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It's the Scottish political gameshow we deserve, frankly.
Just how low would you stoop to climb aboard?
Welcome to the Gravy Train Factor - Part 1
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So this is the low-bar which'll get you blocked by Val Mcdermid, eh?
(I didn't even swear once!)
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We've been having this conversation about Creative Scotland for a decade now and it hasn't gotten better.
A middle-class cartel siphoning public money to the same group of mates over and over again to make...well...hee haw of worth or value.
It needs an inquiry
Creative Scotland awards £85,000 Lottery cash to REIN an explicit hardcore sex film. Cast are paid to have “live” sex-not simulated- practices so extreme they’re offered psychological aftercare. Featuring “trans dykes” the disabled and porn workers. Lesbians warn it’s offensive.
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Just for clarification: this isn't one of mine
🌍Every vote for the
@scottishgreens
on July 4th will be a vote to put people and planet before profit.
🏴For a fairer, greener, independent Scotland,
#VoteScottishGreens
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So beyond the hyperbole, what is this actually for?
What's the root of this stuff? Because it seems to me this is more of the Private Managerial Class, who refuse to actually fucking fix anything, instead conjuring up bollocks to make it look like they're doing something.
Humza Yousaf supports police recording non-crime hate incidents.
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Looks like everyone who was firmly on the Sturgeon side of things is abandoning the sinking ship.
Funny that, eh?
🚨 BREAKING:
@MhairiBlack
tells
@maitlis
she is stepping down as an MP at the next general election.
She says Westminster is a “toxic workplace” that has taken its toll on her "body and mind".
Coming to
@GlobalPlayer
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Catching up on recent events.
Guess I'll be going to jail on April 1st then, eh?
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Judging by Patrick Harvie's speech, expect the SNP to reject Cass report recommendations in return for Scottish Green support as a minority gov.
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PS - the conduct of the politicians who blindly pushed for this is quite frankly appalling. It's an insult to the public, to women, to those whose lives are dedicated to child safeguarding, to the notion of reality.
Their behaviour is antithetical to a diplomatic society.
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I'll do something proper when the time comes (April 17th, eyes peeled) but I just want to say thank you to everyone who's supported me making absolute shite and nonsense this past year.
I've had more messages than I can count.
Genuinely quite humbled.
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I remember vividly Patrick Harvie holding Humza Yousaf's faith in equal disdain.
Oh, wait...
Greens leader
@patrickharvie
says the government has dumped its progressive agenda with a Cabinet reshuffle that saw Kate Forbes become deputy first minister.
"Is this the Scottish Government's vision for the future...taking us back to the repressive values of the 1950s?"
#FMQs
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Not only is this disingenuous pish, this is utterly embarrassing disingenuous pish.
If you didn't think the Scottish Greens were unfit for government before....
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8th - the idea that living in material reality (much like we all believe in gravity) is somehow a 'far right' and 'fascist' belief is so utterly insulting that you would expect it from a teenager not a tax-payer funded public servant.
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NEW SKETCH 😆
'When all you want is the SNP OUT!!!!! SNP OUT!!!! SNP OUT!!!!!'
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In light of recent events 👇
'When you apply for Creative Scotland's 'working class' arts fund'
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Ahaha have some random BTS stuff I just found:
PATRICK HARVIE'S SPAGHETTI HOOPS 😆
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In celebration of the Scottish Greens being the greatest bunch of chancers since Del Boy & Rodney, here's a rerun of the greatest horror movie ever made:
Scottish Greens in the Scheme
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If I was a Scottish Green member who cared about climate change and sustainability and improving society for ordinary people....I would be utterly incandescent with rage at what Patrick Harvie, Greer and Slater have done to the party.
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No wonder nobody makes political satire in Scotland.
Dealing with the constant 'you're hilarious till you slag my chosen brand of bullshit! THEN YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR!' is just fucking tiring.
What a country
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Live how you want to live. Dress how ye like. Shag whoever will have ye.
But let's stop pretending normal people are Nazis and that material reality is a fascist construct, eh?
Christ, this isn't difficult.
I mean where do you start?
Okay. Here goes (fml).
1st - this lot absolutely ignored (screechingly, I'll add) all of the sensible amendments which would have made a UK S35 very unlikely.
2nd - the parliament that voted for this was whipped (SLAB/SNP/Greens)
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