Scott Bennett - at EdFringe 13-25 August!
@scottbcomedyuk
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Comic / Writer / Live at the Apollo / News Quiz / Podcast @BWTBpod / Lockdown show @standupinashed Tours / Gigs / Merch 👉
In the shed / hiding behind it
Joined January 2010
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OUT THIS FRIDAY 19th July 6pm - my first full special “Great Scott” recorded
@ChorleyTheatre
filmed and produced by
@DeadMenTom
and free to watch on YouTube - subscribe to my channel now if you haven’t already! - They’ll be a link in my bio too! - hope you enjoy it
#special
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"BUT WHAT YEAR?!" - More village hall fun in Botley for
@FunnyPeopleCC
- watch till the end!
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England have played in the same way I react when my wife comes in from work and I’ve been at home all day. Do absolutely nothing for hours and then just jump into action and start frantically cooking and cleaning like a lunatic
#ENGvSLO
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🗑️"BIN DAY IS WAY TOO STRESSFUL"🗑️ - RT and share with anyone who feels my pain, we've all had a near miss, we've all chased a bin lorry, big up my bin brothers and sisters out there!
#binday
#binstress
#recycling
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MY ADVICE TO ALL MARRIED MEN - Some sage advice here, "be a capsized windsurfer" - A clip from a set
@blackpoolcomedy
great night. I'm doing a little tour, details here -
#marriage
#marriedmen
#married
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"LUKE LITTLER" - What a legend already, and a big respect to his parents, that's a real commitment. I wonder if my two would take up darts? 🍺🍻
#lukelittler
#darts
#parenting
#funny
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Cleaners can come into your homes and the golf courses are re-opening. I can see a pattern emerging here, what's the next restriction to be lifted I wonder? Skiing holidays?
#poshlockdownrelief
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Sue Gray could be a new paint colour. Probably somewhere in between Misty buff and White Wash.
#SueGray
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Thanks for all the love and messages after my
#liveattheapollo
appearance. It was dream come true, see you all on tour in 2022 🙏❤️
#quichechat
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@laurenpattison
I only recall one Chinese takeaway for my entire childhood. I thought my dad had won the pools 😂
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If they don't start listening to baptiste I'm getting in my car and going down there myself
#TheMissing
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Last night I filmed live at the Apollo! Thank you to my management team, Shaun Almey
@catdeskphone
@christophlander
and everyone at
@bluebook_am
and of course my wingwoman for life,
@jemmajobennett
Chase your dreams folks, eventually you’ll catch them ❤️
#liveattheapollo
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If this government is going to do another lockdown. I really wish they’d have the sense not to threaten us with it at the 11th hour on a Friday. A full weekend of tension until these clowns decide our fate? It’s not the x-factor boot camp, it’s peoples mental health, stop it.
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Props to Putin's daughter for stepping up to take the first dose of the new unregulated covid vaccine. I still can't get my two to try my chicken korma
#RussianVaccine
#vaccine
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"HOW OLD AM I TODAY DADDY?" - For all the parents out there, fraud is a family tradition! - recorded
@frogandbucket
I'm on tour there 13/10, tickets here! I'm also going to other venues too check my site for details
#parenting
#ages
#under3
#themeparks
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Anyone know where I can download the background music when they are cooking?I'm doing my tea and I want that pressure
#celebritymasterchef
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So proud to see my name on the credits as the writer for “Little Mix -The Search” on
@BBCOne
, great to work with the brilliant
@IAmChrisRamsey
again!
Best thing is, to my daughters I’m finally a cool dad! 😂
Catch the show every Saturday night for the next two weeks, 6.10pm!
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One day I hope to achieve the level of fame where the door staff at a venue I’m gigging at, don’t ask me if I have a ticket 😂😂
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Love island to ban fast fashion for the contestants to help the environment. Nice start. Want to make a real difference? Stop flying them out to an air conditioned villa in Spain and send them on a Megabus to a static caravan in Rhyl.
#loveisland
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Just having a minutes silence. My eldest daughter has now graduated to the adult menu at the pub. 🥲🥲🥲
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Pubs closing to allow schools to open? I daren’t tell my ten year old, she’s now a regular down the Red Lion. She was getting great at darts too.
#pubsclosing
#schoolsreopeninguk
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First trophy since junior football in 1987. And all it took was the entire comedy industry to grind to a halt 😂😂
“Comedians Comedian 2020”
Thanks to all who voted! ❤️ a positive in a rubbish year!
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@simonharris_mbd
Whenever I post goes up like this, I make a note of everyone who missed the joke, just so I can avoid them in the real world 😂👍
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Getting trolled from the CBeebies crew 😂
Don't listen to him, we love teachers ❤️
Although nursery workers do it too
@scottbcomedyuk
! 😂
How much have your kids brought home this week? 🎄
@BBCiPlayer
#ChristmasHolidays
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I don’t care what he’s playing, he’s 80, he’s a Beatle and he’s a legend, he can do whatever the hell he wants.
#Glastonbury2022
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Bit special tonight ❤️ One off the bucket list, hometown arena gig with the legendary Micky Flanagan!
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My first ever virtual gig, "Stand up from the shed" 19.03.20, 8pm, live streamed here on my Facebook Page, please RT
#selfisolating
#coronavirusuk
#comedy
#laughteristhebestmedicine
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When the fam surprise you in Edinburgh ❤️😂
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So pleased! Thanks to all who voted, all who watched
@standupinashed
and the promoters who kept things going. Well done to the other winners too. Special thank you to
@SarahMillican75
@alwaysbecomedy
@JasonManford
@covid_comedy
for their support! X
Scott Bennett named Comics' Comic of 2020 | And Lou Conran best MC
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Five year old was writing her birthday invites and put 16.00 instead of 4pm. Calm down mate, it’s only clip and climb, you’re not going paintballing in Helmand province 😂
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Madness, at this rate I'll be able to put on my very first "shedstival" ha ha" see you all next week! x
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I feel sorry for kids now. I know we have on demand, but there was something so magical about Saturday morning cartoons. Now it’s all cooking programmes. These kids may never have seen Roadrunner or Thundercats but at least they can knock up a risotto before they turn six.
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@edfringe
@steveh11
@FringeCentral
There’s an app for my video doorbell, this the largest arts festival in the world. 🤷♂️
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Did a gig, met some Alpacas, standard.
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Keir Starmer is so useless at taking advantage of the tories incompetence, if he was a Mortal Kombat character his finishing move would be to help them up and take them to a walk in centre.
#KeirStarmer
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Superb night supporting
@RobBrydon
back on yorkshire soil
@HuddsTownHall
my favourite date so far
#yorkshire
#Comedy
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I've got to tell my kids that Xmas will be very different this year. But instead of just giving them the facts, I'm going to do it over several days, in the style of our government, leaving post it notes of doom around the house just to maximize the levels of anxiety.
#lockdown
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First night off in ages and it’s timed with some good news. My Dad has had a little health scare recently but today we were given some positive news and we can go forward from here and look to the future! He’s picking back up his Ukulele and off for a carvery again ❤️👍
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"Stand up from the shed" is 20 weeks old! 20 hours of shows, topical stand up, sketches, songs and phone calls to my parents. Thanks to all who support us! Next show 6th August, here as always:
#shedinburghfringe
#shedshow
#standupfromtheshed
#shedcomedy
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Cracking family holiday in Cornwall…..
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Social media just reminded me of this. Six years ago today. I’d left my full time job a week before, I was terrified, I’d never been a risk taker, but I’m so glad I took the leap and people were there to support me. Moments like this are something I’ll treasure forever. ❤️
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Parents always know when their child is about to abandon one of their hobbies. It’s the day after you’ve bought all the kit.
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There are many reasons why I ❤️
@jemmajobennett
, this is one. During a zoom meeting with our bank manager, I notice that she is tapping away on a calculator. I thought she’d uncovered a breakthrough with our finances, she then turned it upside down, to display the word “boobies”
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Not sure what they are replacing it with yet. If you want to find out you have to ring at 8 o’clock in the morning.
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My biggest tour audience to date, nearly 300 people at Rotherham civic what a night! - lovely to meet Paul and his ducting, Debbie does floors, Debbie who straps in children for a living, Ash the driver, and Owen the mechanic for a garage that he made up! - unreal atmosphere ❤️🔥
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Been asked if I want to insure my tumble dryer for repairs, it’s £15.99 a month, my life insurance is £8.99 a month. I was moaning to Mrs B about it, “it’s twice the cost of insuring my life!” “yeah, but I couldn’t live without my tumble dryer”
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Total honesty here. I’ve got a tour date in Glasgow
@GleeClubGlasgow
, (my only one in Scotland) and tickets aren’t shifting as well as I’d hoped. I’m loving doing the show and I have press in too! If any Glasgow folk could give this a RT I’d really appreciate it. Link in bio ❤️
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I still can’t believe Rik Mayall isn’t around. I never met him, but he was such a force of nature, seems impossible he’s not here. I think you can miss people you’ve never met. For me that’s the one that’s top of the list every time I’m asked.
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Thrilled to say I’m recording a stand up special for
@BBCRadio4
with
@mimproductions
this year. “Objects of our affections” is a show about my career as a designer, the things we buy and why we want them. It’ll be recorded later this year! ❤️
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Getting a car through the MOT without any work been done is like when your kid passes their exams. You’re so proud of it. I like to treat it afterwards too, a little trip through the drive thru, a couple of new Magic Tree’s and give its dashboard a little ruffle with a duster.
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There is a reason Christmas is in December, it’s cold beers on the back step weather. Natures fridge 👌 Merry Christmas folks ❤️
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Really enjoyed my brief time
@edfringe
thanks to all who came to the shows. The fringe is 75 years old, wow, just think there are probably people out there who did the very first year who have almost paid it off.
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Thank you
@frogandbucket
what a brilliant tour show tonight. ❤️❤️❤️
#birminghamtomanchester
#relax
#relaxtour
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Tonight I had the joy of supporting
@JohnBishop100
@IpswichRegent
his show is phenomenal. What a great night, I’m on a little tour myself,
@ColchesterArts
14/10/22, ticket link in bio
#righthererightnow
#johnbishop
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People filming children having a meltdown in public and sticking it online, stop it. You know nothing about their lives, this isn’t clickbait, it’s a kid. You were allowed to make mistakes before social media existed, let them do the same.
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Give the guy a break, he didn’t even know what contactless was until last year. He’s probably used to being strapped in by a nanny.
#SeatBeltSunak
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Can’t wait for this, my first proper tour, it’s a compilation of my favourite bits, gonna be 🔥
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Can’t take the risk can they? With no financial safety nets it’s a career that’s not an option for most. Then they wonder where all the working class voices are? Diversity has to start to include class too, we need other viewpoints.
New research exclusively seen by Channel 4 News shows just 1 in 12 creatives working in TV and Film in England, Wales and Northern Ireland are from working class backgrounds.
Actor Samira Ahmed says her experience of drama school made her realise "you need connections".
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Well that was a joy! 2 hours, unscripted, on stage with these legends
@thecustomshouse
tonight; an absolute riot with
@jasonmarkcook
and
@IAmChrisRamsey
thanks to all who came ❤️ (Jason cook is sponsored by coco-damol)
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You’re not a parent until you’ve bought a trampoline and then watch the thing gradually decay in your garden for the best part of a decade.
#parenting
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Off on tour ain’t I? Greatest hits, no waffle, just bangers. Details here - come along, show my mum that this wasn’t all just a dreadful life choice 😂 ❤️
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Found this tonight, from 2015, I remember that my daughter took it in for a show and tell at school. I really miss this world at the moment 🥲
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An absolutely incredible night last night. First ever sell out
@CustomsHouseLP
still can’t believe it. Thanks to all who came, the team, the staff and
@jasonmarkcook
who I love like a brother ❤️ back with a new show in 2023, tickets here -
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These machines are like a gateway drug, just give me Cartman now before I lose the house.
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There is another Scott Bennett who is a comedian in America. Every so often a have a small heart attack when I get looped into a Facebook group, confirming a gig in LA that night, when I am on my way to do twenty minutes in Hull. I wonder if he has the same issue?
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“Labour have no plan” - I think they’d have probably remembered the umbrella though mate
#rishi
#tories
#election
#generalelection
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My six year old adores Gavin and Stacey. I’m not going to stand in the way of it. What’s occurring? A comedy education mate. Next stop Early Doors. ❤️
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Really thrilled my daughter brought her instant camera on this holiday….
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@SteveSpeirs4
These kids have never heard of bugs bunny but they can knock up a risotto before they are 5 so there is that 😂
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I'm getting so good at estimating what two metres is, I reckon I could plan out an entire extension without a tape measure.
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Edinburgh Fringe Review: Scott Bennett, Just The Tonic @ Mash House
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Thanks to all who watched my very first "stand up from the shed" we had some technical issues but you all persevered with it, thank you so much.
I'm going to do it all again next week, but with the glitches ironed out.
Thanks for all the love x
My first ever virtual gig, "Stand up from the shed" 19.03.20, 8pm, live streamed here on my Facebook Page, please RT
#selfisolating
#coronavirusuk
#comedy
#laughteristhebestmedicine
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Well this is lovely 🥰
Midlands Comedy Awards results. Scott Bennett wins two awards, plus prizes for Jon Pearson, Tal Davies, Ricky Balshaw, Good Kids, Jack Kirwan and Geoff Rowe:
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This has been my best
@LeicsComedyFest
since I started stand up. I’m so overwhelmed to have sold out my 3 shows. I can’t tell you what that means❤️. Thanks to
@Bigdiffco
for all their support. See you all on the tour, sign up to my mailing list on my website for all the deets x
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The words Denzel Washington said to Will Smith were powerful “it’s when you’re at your highest moment that the devil will come for you” that really resonated with me. I once got an encore at Doncaster Mecca Bingo, I felt like god. On my way home, got done for speeding.
#WillSmith
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My
#liveattheapollo
appearance is bumped until tomorrow but my
#liveatthewitham
wasn’t going to be stopped by any football! What an audience
@BarneyWitham
falconry, sexy man knees, clowns and American zookeepers! ❤️
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Happy New Year folks! - Here's one of my favourite moments from 2021, thrusting on stage at
#liveattheapollo
#HappyNewYear
always follow your dreams kids 😂
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It's easy to tell the difference between a work event and a party. If you're wearing a suit and someone is taking minutes its a work event, if you're wearing your tie around your head and someone is taking ketamine, it's probably a party.
#PMQs
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Thanks Dad, it’s only taken ten years 😂😂
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Happy tinfoil roulette day! - is it cheese? Is it meat? Is it part of a human? No one knows!
#newyearsday
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To all the parents trying to homeschool, don’t put pressure on yourself, you’re doing great. This government is made up of ministers who went to Eton, the finest education money can buy, and they’ve shown themselves to be absolute idiots.
#homeschooling
#schoolsreopening
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Someone saw these pictures and messaged me to say “congratulations on your first TV break” still haven’t got the heart to tell them it was for my vaccination 😂😂😂
#tvcredit
#vaccinated
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Got rapped on the knuckles for last nights show. Sorry everyone xxx
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So much fun, so honoured to be asked onto this game changing pod! ❤️
EARLY ACCESS IS LIVE🚨
This week star of Live at The Apollo,
@scottbcomedyuk
joined us on the couch. We spoke about sex interventions, K Pop, bees, cumming, losing a bollock and we invented a new questionable brand...
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"WHEN CROWD WORK GOES BAD!" - Ever want to know what it's like when 150 buttcheeks clench simultaneously? - watch to the end!
#improv
#comedy
#crowdwork
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Genius ❤️ what a talent he was
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I’m doing a limited run
@edfringe
this year, it’s a massive room, I would love to fill it. I’m
@Justthetonic
in the big room. in return I’ll be doing my best hour of stand up from the last ten years, it’s honed, crammed with jokes and I’m so excited! - ticket link in bio ❤️
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