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@s1ckt1r3d
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yeah
yall ever just look at ur drafts and ur like girl what the hell are u talking about
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opinion for today is that flirting has little to do with liking someone and more to do with impressing yourself with your cute little word play and timing and wit and charm etc
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hate when a bitch sends a meme saying "me" but it's actually not her at all ur lack of an accurate self-concept is giving me second hand embarrassment
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u gotta be really passionate about lying down to get this...a supine savant if u will
this is the most insane way i ever seen anyone watch youtube… ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️
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types of friends i need rn:
- vintage reseller/dropshipper who lets me have first pick
- morally bankrupt pharmacist
- guy who is obsessed with me and acts like a butler but without the beta male vibes
- babysitter
- worldly spinster with a beautiful house
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used to be jealous of people who read smth crazy like 50 books a year but then realised they're reading colleen hoover
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@ranjini00
lowkey meaningless flirting with a stranger hits so good when u already like someone else like i'm practicing for bae rn
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cigarettes make me faint, caffeine fucks up my stomach, alcohol makes me a bad person.....the universe keeps sending me signs that i need to get my money up and start buying coke
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born to keep 2 shirt buttons open forced to keep only 1 shirt button open
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the reason ppl get less funny online when they're in relationships is not because they're too happy it's because they're under surveillance
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if ur under 5'2 please don't hang out in my peripheral vision i will clock u as a dog and get scared 💔💔💔
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everyone knows a guy from gurgaon who's lowkey guilty of committing several war crimes
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"do u guys wanna hear my ukulele cover of-" no the fuck i don't. get some drums up in here bitch
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@khetinhabitant
i don't think this applies to all flirting just the very over the top pickup line rizzy shit that you'd see screenshots of online
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do people not have friends who like and respect their taste and enjoy seeing what they're upto
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discovering that alcohol lets me sleep at a normal hour is probably some kind of dangerous slippery slope
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@ComradeVT
ashoka is so crazy for coming out with shitty campus life policies and distracting u guys with sum gimmicky shit year after year and constantly getting away with it
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i let him hit because it was the best way to get him to finally ghost me after 18 months of half-hearted talking
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the reason u can't get a man to commit is because u don't let him cheat on u :/
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i don't think u need to only read difficult "worthy" literature but some discrimination is necessary
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my stomach is making noises that modular synth artists could only dream of
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the baby corn is born goated while the baby carrot recieves an unfortunate fate of being limpdicked with no swag....however their fate reverses with time....grown up carrot finds itself goated with the sauce and the poor grown up corn is rendered bitchless
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just discovered a strange paralysis hack: type ur essay question into chatgpt and see how badly it writes ur essay for u so that u feel motivated to just start the task yourself because at least you won't be as lame as that nerd ass robot
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compliments mean fucking nothing unless they're coming from an older woman then they're life affirming and spiritually healing
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texting dry ass replies like a fuckboy with a 20 person roster.... you either die a hero or live long enough to see urself become the villain fr :/
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it is cultural appropriation when i put someone onto some good shit and they keep posting about it without acknowledging my extremely significant contribution to their new-found aura
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8 failed talking stages this jan translates to 0 valentines this feb i sure do love my life
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synesthesia probably isn't even real like i can just start lying. this song smells like peepee poopoo. this colour tastes like wall
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drinking 3 americanos at work everyday so that i can be extra sharp while doing my capitals cities of the world quiz
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can't believe some of u think people are into u because they view all ur stories have u ever considered compulsive instagram usage as a more plausible reason
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u know what I really miss.. pacifiers i hate that as an adult I just have to smoke a cigarette
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barbie feels like it was written by a group of very talented funny people who hate each other and couldn't compromise on whose parts get cut out
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there's so many songs that make me want to kill myself and i say this as a compliment
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ig notes is actually the worst feature some guy has been asking for cigarettes over there for weeks you'd think by now he'd have bought some
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lagta hai mujhe abse hindi mein hi apne vichaar prastut karne chahiye taaki inn sensitive videshiyon ko mujhe baar baar ek hating ass bitch bolne ki naubat na aaye
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enough about separating art from the artist we gotta start separating art from its patrons i've been avoiding a lot of potentially good stuff because i find the fanbase weird
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never post a quirky doodle on ur story i'm fighting off dudes who have graduated ashoka trying to 😂 react their way into my DMs bro don't u have some consulting to do
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in a thrift store's DMs being like "its not that i dont trust u it's just that i have a lot of unresolved trauma from when another thrift store cheated on me by never sending me the teal carhartt jacket i ordered"
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cracked an egg for the first time today!!!!!! feeling like the protagonist of a coming of age novel
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fun fact this show got me into hiphop in a serious way bc i discovered run the jewels in one of their outros and i was like wooahhh so rap isn't just eminem that's crazy
Silicon Valley premiered 10 years ago on HBO. While many of the dynamics and situations depicted still exist today, it already feels like a period piece, a window into a bygone era
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i cannot prosper in humidity i need to be stored in a cool dry environment
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i'm not gonna lie............they kinda ate with live laugh love like that's kinda what life is all about
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idgaf about fumbling bad bitches but the memories of fumbling my extremely rare and short lived windows of motivation keep me up at night
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this was how i smoked my first ever joint at a random park in vasant kunj
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unfortunately i really enjoy opening my parents fridge and throwing out all their expired condiments i hope they never change this gives me so much purpose
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they're having a filler off
kim kardashian posting a selfie w the aishwarya rai bachchan was not on my 2024 bingo card
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nobody wants to day drink and pass out at 9pm anymore society is so rotten
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old school cameras are for the self acceptance folk only i never want to spend a bunch of money to get pictures developed just to find out i look ugly
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girl i find annoying gave me a gram of shrooms for free in my dream and now i find her less annoying
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u know that mysore pak is good when just 1 bite has u feeling fat as fuck
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looksmaxxing—so hopeful in the present tense—but to become looksmaxxed....there is hardly a fate more cruel than finally meeting the boundaries of progress
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omg why does everything have to be a subtweet....have u ever considered that all of this is fiction and i'm just worldbuilding....
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wearing a bad outfit as a method of financial safeguarding bc if i don't fw my fit i won't feel like being in public and spending money
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somebody must have already written an essay about how hookup culture is anti-kantian in the sense that it treats people as means rather than ends but in case they haven't i invented this thought so note that down ✍️
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how it feels to be me
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saw a dog frolicking in a pile of leaves and felt jealous and miserable
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why do padded blouses exist do i really need bulletproof tits anytime i wear a saree
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i'm tired of pretending like i'm not the female version of patrick bateman
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i'm probably the most valuable friend anyone could have because u can always count on me to be worse off than you in any way that counts
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why does this emo shit get attention getting over 20 likes on a tweet is lowkey so humiliating
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im so happy i've graduated i can't imagine caring about a bunch of high schoolers not eating at the mess
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is it more embarrassing to admit to spending 15 mins in the restroom thrice a day just to take offputting selfies and waste time in other miscellaneous ways or is it more embarrassing to let my coworkers believe i'm taking a shit thrice a day
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been saying it since 2022 i have been majorly lacking an adversary to fuel all my half done creative projects so can someone piss me off or break my heart real quick
I can't get over how Kendrick was saying he had writer's block for 2 years on Worldwide Steppers and yet he dropped 4 tracks in the span of a few days, spite is truly the greatest motivator.
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lowkey running out of time to fulfill my dream of being a chic 25 yr old divorcée so i'll start preparing for plan B which is to have a hoe phase in my 60s
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men probably are kinda superior cuz my small female brain wouldn't be able to handle lovebombing multiple people at once while still managing to finish my work
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they should invent a job that doesn't make you feel like you're watching your life passing by without substance
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need to do fentanyl sooo bad i want one of those dope dear fentanyl edits made about me when i overdose and die
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people who like the old money aesthetic are just people who like dark academia but can't read
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we need to make girls with chapped lips and busted cuticles the beauty standard next
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now me personally, i prefer the aristocratic elegance of the micropenis over the nietzschean pro-sex, pro-beauty large-dicked man
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guruji ke darshan ho gaye shukrana 💯💯💯🙏🙏🙏🙏🤲🤲🤲🤲🤲
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been depressed for the last 4 days. been employed for the last 4 days. really makes u think
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having the kinda day where i see a picture of myself as a child and start tearing up
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so rude when a friend doesn't like my story like what did my picture of a wall even do to u
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