mr. puff
@rishipuff
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actor and cyberbully. i write https://t.co/ZkJhrx6ksS and post on https://t.co/xwCDbf8XDd and https://t.co/QOyFQo4pfr
Los Angeles, CA
Joined August 2014
i feel so bad when i overtake an old person on the sidewalk like man i really didn't mean to flex on you with my youthful stride.
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bro i can't believe they're doing this to prevent a Joe Biden presidency like yall will literally be ok.
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am i missing something did joe biden do anything significant in the last 12 months besides literally just not be Donald Trump. cause i did that too.
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abolish the five day work week please i need to do my dishes.
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when the pandemic started i was 20 and now i'm. on psychiatric medication.
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no way did god put human beings on this earth so we could give each other parking tickets.
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sorry for viewing your story 42 seconds after u posted it i am addicted to tapping little circles on my phone.
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hilarious that today is both eid and the met gala. i'm scrolling through instagram seeing the biggest celebrities in the world getting eaten alive by any random group of muslim people taking pics in front of their garage door.
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therapist asked me if id seen 500 days of summer which i think was his way of telling me i am the problem.
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texting my friends complete nonsense in place of "excited to see you later"
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i love how each lookalike competition is specific to the city it occurs in. will los angeles do shohei ohtani.
A Jeremy Allen White lookalike contest is coming to Chicago this weekend.
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johnson and johnson made my baby shampoo and now my covid vaccine damn they really did say no more tears.
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this is really the absolute worst time in history to be a person interested in human creativity.
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fucking queen. i will be supporting her work for the rest of my life.
Melissa Barrera’s post on social media after being dropped from ‘Scream’ for denouncing the genocide in Gaza:. “At the end of the day, I'd rather be excluded for who I include, than be included for who I exclude.”
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we can't all be underemployed creatives someone in the group chat needs to know what insurance is.
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people who hate kids are so annoying and wrong. kids talk about dragons and adults post earnestly on linkedin you tell me who's winning.
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insane that spiders don't immediately die when you hit them with something the size of a shampoo bottle?? like if you whacked me with a ford explorer i'd obviously be dead instantly. am i just a pussy.
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i'm not addicted to my phone i'm addicted to my friends. who oftentimes are inside of my phone.
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i know wearing indian clothes at a wedding must hit so hard when ur white.
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i feel so insane confronting the fact that there was an outpouring of public mourning for the 260 israeli lives tragically lost, and now radio silence for the thousands of palestinians that are being indiscriminately killed in retaliation.
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sometimes in LA i'll meet someone who self describes as a "storyteller" and i'll be like oh cool are u a writer or something and they're like actually i'm responsible for firing people at HBO.
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summer in nyc is so funny everybody outside with their tote bag and interracial relationship.
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men celebrating cosby's release i simply assume have assaulted women too.
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robert pattinson may truly be the definition of literally just some guy.
Robert Pattinson says there were 'months at a time' while filming 'Tenet' where he was not even ‘vaguely understanding’ the film
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how is it so hard to get laundry done when i literally have a machine doing like 90% of the work. i need a laundry machine machine.
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ive made a lot of mistakes in my life, but there was a time as a nerdy pre-teen that i chose between being someone who watched weird white guys pretend to be funny on youtube and developing worthwhile hobbies and interests. today i reap the benefits.
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now that i'm unemployed i'm realizing my main hobby was spending money.
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my likes are full of stuff like this now.
I’m in an uncomfortable stage of my life where my old self is gone but my new self isn’t fully born yet. I am in midst of transformation.
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nothing i'm as passionate about as having the window seat on planes. you get to look at the miraculous earth below and never have to get out of your seat for anybody . window seat supremacy forever.
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this is hunger games shit.
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi speaks alongside George Floyd’s daughter, Gianna Floyd, one year after his murder:. “Gianna said, ‘My daddy will change the world.’ Indeed, her prediction is coming true.”
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marjorie taylor greene wont see your tweet making fun of her workout, but your crossfit friend who makes small children wait in line for the monkey bars because they're using it for exercises that turn their joints into peanut butter will. and that's worth it.
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likes being hidden is so freeing ive lost all sense of political consistency.
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im laughing so hard man AOC Ilhan Rashida and Markey all decisively win their primaries and the DNC nominated the segregationist talking nutsack what's not clicking.
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you should be able to send someone's instagram story to their psychiatrist.
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all timer
Favorite tweet of your own?.
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and obviously we're past this but this is such a jarring image i dont even really have the words to articulate it
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joe biden won't have fireside chats he's gonna just stream veggie tales.
Our way is plain: It is the way of democracy — of lawfulness, and of respect — respect for each other, and for our nation.
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woahhh just saw an instagram story that changed my view on a complex issue.
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every day i am asked to spend anywhere from 1 to 2 million dollars.
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origin story of this banger:.- see spider in shower.- hit it with shampoo bottle.- it lives, hit more.- it disappears.- thoughts happen.- grab phone from shower.- tweet.- spend next 8 minutes in the shower thinking about if it was ok to say pussy for this tweet like feminism wise.
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you ever just see a tweet from a politician and just go yeah they definitely wrote that one
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me wording this tweet poorly and getting engagement from both sides of the argument
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can an astrology girl explain to me why the planets made him this way cause i just can't hold tom hanks responsible.
Chet Hanks speaks on the Covid-19 vaccine despite both his parents getting Covid: "You ain’t stickin’ me with that motherf-’ needle. It’s the motherf-n’ flu. Get over it, okay?".WATCH:
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@alexgmurd don't even get me started on the enemies to lovers plotline. where's my app for lust and spite.
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ma'am those are christians.
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breaking up w my long distance gf by telling her im tryina get my screen time down.
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something that really strikes me from this is the description of pivoting with each of her new projects in response to the reception or critique of the last one- that seems like not a great place to Make Stuff from.
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this man is not gonna die dog he's gonna recover in a week say it's no big deal and start calling joe biden a pussy for not kissing him on the mouth at the next debate.
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toothpaste is named so appropriately. that stuff is totally tooth paste.
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i literally cannot believe the slander for the lorde album how yall hate major chords this much.
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so is everyone else also having a specifically bad time right now or.
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this may be asking for too much but i would also like to be administered the vaccine like this. for my troubles
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almost all of my close white friends have divorced parents. does this mean a lot of white people have divorced parents or that a lot of kids with divorced parents like indian kids.
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these were three of the funniest people i went to school with and the institutions of comedy should revolve around their taste.
easily one of the funniest things to come out of the app, someone posted it on tumblr lmfao
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im not gonna take any shit about not making my bed. i have a weighted blanket, whadyou think i am??? hercules ????? i also might be clinically malnourished.
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@holy_schnitt as someone who's been online since before my frontal lobe started developing im living vicariously through her earnestness.
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not to be this guy but an assassination attempt is kind of one of the most Precedented Events.
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WHICH one of y'all is doing this on AOC's instagram PLEASE just pay for your feet pics
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chance im not gonna write in princess diana.
Ask your mom who to vote for. Vote for who she say.
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speaking out about palestine has only ever strengthened my relationships with those i want to keep in my personal and professional life. it has never cost me an opportunity because anything lost in support of palestine is something i would never want to have.
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i think it's possible that luigi shouted out the feds of his own accord
no manifesto has ever thanked the police that wasn’t written by the cops themselves
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media is really trying to bring down men of color today (cuomo, italian; chet hanks, jamaican).
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the actual movies are back moment has come.
Dev Patel on the trans representation in #MonkeyMan and including the hijra community in his film: "This is an anthem for the underdog, the voiceless, the marginalized."
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100 rts and i ruin this game of catan by bringing up communism
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@Twitter 2020 made me miss the seventh grade and truly nothing good was happening in the seventh grade.
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no way did i ratio the actual TIME tweet that's fucking crazy next im coming for scholastic's math magazine. theyve harmed me.
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i swear to god you unpack a little bit of trauma and life starts to feel like constantly doing molly.
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i choose to believe in astrology because i've dated three virgo women who all hated my guts and i'd rather chalk it up to them being born in september than acknowledge the other common factor. that being my personality.
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people are like "i used to read so much idk what happened" well i do. u got the pornography on the iphones.
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i have way too much impostor syndrome for a guy living in a society that lets ben shapiro brand himself as smart.
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