superb, short for superbitch
@paytxhn
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you shouldn’t let poets lie to you
Glasgow, Scotland
Joined January 2011
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Pinned Tweet
tell me you need to get out more without telling me you need to get out more
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something so embarrassing about stepping out in january with fresh shoes. oooh did u get those for xmas??? did santa bring u those???? mortifying
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people luvvv an open plan kitchen/living area until ur trying to watch a film and the washing machine has 30 mins to go and u cant escape the smell of dinner
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i keep clicking on the instagram app like a stupid little lab rat pushing buttons for treats. nothing happens but i will keep trying
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love island was so shit last year but will i still sit down at 9pm every single night to watch it? obviously
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had to run straight out the shop after closing to catch my bus and ive got a big trench coat on so it was like flying out behind me and i heard some guy shout from the pub ‘its fucking dracula!’ actual nobody look at me again
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ive accidentally ended up on a bus full of school wains and a wee guy just went ‘check her n her sainsbos bag’ and am absolutely fuckin mortified
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just learned about the existence of this twiggy interview with woody allen and it is *chefs kiss* perfection
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omg twiggy talking about this interview in 2009, she doesnt even look embarrassed in the video im obssssessed put that beast in his place!
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#GrowingUpEmo
600 posters strategically pinned in your bedroom until no wall underneath was visible
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‘all ya basic philosophas’ all of them ??? every one?????? nonce
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had to close the holly willoughby video after ‘first of all, are u ok’ lmao i actually cant watch anything with that level of fake earnest-y it makes me feel like an alien
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davide and ekin-su are soooo funny. look at them both trying to keep a straight face and pretend to give a fuck about a few kisses
#LoveIsland
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men actually lose their fucking minds when someone even remotely feminine presenting has short hair
See this 👇🏼 This would have been terrored in the Glasgow I grew up in!! This is a fuckin crank of the highest order!! Absolutely no clue what it was like to grow up in a scheme!! This is what anti bullying gets you 🤚🏻😂
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obsessed with folk wondering what bambi fury is gonna do in a job interview???? guys i hate to break it to u but that baby will never do a job interview in her life
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I honestly get SO excited to see everyone's christmas presents so all you losers who say it's 'braggy' please go away it's EXCITING god
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when i found out tht yous were only seeing the lights through ur phone with the saturation bumped i went to bed peacefully at 10pm last night
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the irony of this being a specsavers van that's parked on the rising bollards RIGHT NEXT TO the big red sign saying not to do exactly that is not lost on me
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imagine someone saying ‘i am weed’ to you oh my fucking god this reads like a 14 year old’s fanfiction
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birds 😤 who take photos 😡😤 of their cocktails 😡🤬🤯
Amount of birds who take photos of their cocktails in fucking snail and cabbage or whatever the fuck it’s called does my head in
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went to the shop and looked up at our living room window :((( her wee ears :((((((
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I have all the harry potter's on dvd to watch whenever I want but it doesn't make it any less exciting when it comes on tv
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absolutely obsessed with this
Paul Hollywood's ex Summer claims he 'didn't bake' and preferred 'cheap sliced bread'
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‘girlies’ is very gender neutral for me. it holds the same place in my brain as ‘guys’
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sandy just sent me this pic of me and cleo having a wee nap and SORRY but now im crying . her little face pressed on my cheek! wtf!
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can't believe lil chris has died at only 24, the 10 year old inside me just died
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i just watched a guy drop one of his gloves while he was walking along the street but im on top of the bus and he cant see me omgggg
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she’s been looking at me like this for a while now
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just realising how much of a Vibe the tweenies were. those outfits? iconic
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i really try not to judge but this lassie just came into the cafe im in, set up her laptop, got her wee pencil case out, put her coat on the chair etc, took a photo of the set up and then packed it all up and left . never even bought a coffee ? am i mental or is tht mental
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im knitting a tiny little frog and this is his current progress . gonna give him some eyes and a bow tie tonight. pleased with this boy
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I'm not going to be a 'good sport' and 'accept it', we had ONE chance to make scotland everything it could be and we fucking threw it away
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it's skint times like this that I'm kept up at night thinking of all those times I bought actual juice in restaurants instead of just water
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scrolled past this story so many times today and have concluded that there absolutely needs to be some kind of legal responsibility for bystanders. the fact this was able to happen is repulsive
Man who raped woman in front of other passengers on London Underground jailed
Read more🔗
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if you’d told me 10 years ago that blink 182 would have to cancel a chunk of their tour because of kourtney kardashian i wouldn’t have believed u
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the great barrier reef was just pronounced dead, how much of the planet is gonna shrivel and die before people start taking care of it
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nahhh those jonah hill texts are triggering my fight or flight lmao. the WORST kind of men are the pathetic ones with an arsenal of therapy speak like ‘setting boundaries’ and ‘self-respect’ to excuse their controlling/manipulation
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hijacking this tweet to show everyone the cake a professional made for my 21st lmao. my mum cried about it
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almost 100% convinced we’ve been sucked through a worm hole into a parallel universe cos everything just feels WEIRD
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sandy came home from work, went for a bath, then got out and put jeans on? like to chill for the night ??? i’m correct in thinking thts absolutely fucking mental yes?
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a 25 MILLION y/o natural phenomenon just died, ice caps melting, rainforests disappearing, bees dying, oceans emptying, why does nobody care
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'I've got 5 tiaras and turned down one of the richest men on earth' ok goals
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i went out in this outfit today and then sandy came home like ‘are u doing a vivienne westwood tribute’
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phillip schofield and holly willoughby are two of the first to go in the class war sorry
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struggle to watch stuff like this and struggle to cope with reading the comments even more. we have absolutely no idea how to support people with complex needs in this country it makes me ill
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screaming at the idea of someone’s manager getting a load of emails like ‘um one of ur employees is actually pretty mean btw :/’ like ???
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thinking about how i’d go out for lunch at school everyday for like 4 years straight and get chips, fried rice and curry sauce, a massive bar of chocolate and a lucozade orange . every single day? and i’m still alive and kicking? teenagers are indestructible
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sorry the cleo content is too much today but she’s really on a roll with being hilarious . her FACE after she bites me! she’s so evil!
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just heard a guy answer the phone to his ragin wife with ‘u no calmed doon yet ?’ n audibly gasped at the sheer stupidity
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barbie's nutcracker and swan lake were literally my favourite films in the whole world I used to watch them on VIDEO constantly
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kourtney kardashian trying to spin herself working with boohoo as some big statement about sustainability and wanting to fix it from within is soooooo funny and annoying lol
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jeffree star is releasing highlighters, a sparkly red lipstick and a metallic one WHY does he want my money so bad
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i am sick of us acting like a woman feeling unsafe around a man, particularly a man that is literally looking her up and down, is ever irrational. do u know harassment rates? SA rates? shut up
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i think if nigel farage defended me id delete all my accounts and move away
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phoned the docs this morning, got straight through, receptionist was lovely, had an appointment within 2 hours and the doctor was an absolute star who properly listened to me for like the first time ever???? sounds fake but ok
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i honestly canny imagine being in a position like molly mae’s and being like ‘wow i deserve this’ HOW can u honestly believe uve earned ur millions at 22 by going on reality tv and looking good on insta . the rich can rot
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i hate watching mediocre rich kids succeed in creative fields cos mum and dad can subsidise their fannying about for a few years until something sticks
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i dont how to explain this but something about anne hathaway just isnt ‘cool’ enough for the outfits she’s been wearing ??? im so sorry
babe wake up new anne hathaway valentino couture show pics just dropped
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ppl see someone trying to do good and their instant reaction is to find a way to invalidate it, why is everyone’s mentality always ‘u must be doing absolutely everything or youre as well just doing nothing’
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anybody who voted no better not say a single word when we're getting fucked by Westminster more than ever before
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is loose women SERIOUSLY debating whether rape is ever justified?! The debate itself is SO harmful I'm absolutely disgusted
#loosewomen
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i take nice photos of myself approx once every couple of months so yes im obviously posting them everywhere
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this collection was bloody amazing I love them all
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the worst thing ever is when someone gets a red face and everyone is all 'OOOH YOUVE GONE RED' like NO leave them alone you VULTURES
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someone told me this is probably the longest amount of time ill have off work until i retire and i cant stop thinking about it. the sweet relief of a fucking global pandemic. capitalism is a disease
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the andrew tate thing is a prime example of why i HATE ‘oh theyre just trolls, we should just ignore them’ patter - they build online popularity through controversy but are sooooo often a genuinely dangerous person
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im too impatient to wait for a better pic but my new tattoo!!!!! its so gorgeous i could be sick!!! also i could probs be sick cos it hurt soooo much and i feel properly like ive been battered now
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if this was true then just patch ur work then???? go on benefits and live the high life? folk that say this know fine well that theyre talking shite they just hate their job and love blaming poor folk
Benefit payments going up, pensions going up, low income households getting payments, unemployed getting payments but if you work full time you get no help and pay more in tax and national insurance to fund all of the above. What’s the point in working 😂🫣
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three cheers for my teenage-life crisis being over and accepting that dark hair is definitely for me
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obviously i had a bday photoshoot including my new frog son . and obviously im back in my jammies while i post this. obviously
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kids at my work asked me to film them falling over today so we could ‘email it to youve been framed and get £250’ . nice to see the old classics are still alive
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the feminine urge to post ur most recent selfies on every social media platform
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