Neve
@neveofficiall
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If a duck were a beautiful woman
The white house
Joined April 2022
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Pinned Tweet
I’m so sorry Professor I couldn’t do my readings this weekend because unfortunately I fell out of a coconut tree and hit my head causing me to forget that I exist in the context of all in which I live and all which came before me :(
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No one should be this famous. Imagine eating a chicken nugget with normal condiments and then the Empire State Building lights up in honor of it
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Happy birthday to the video that made me laugh so hard I almost fatally choked!
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The third knives out movie should be set at an all-girls highschool
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Twitter rn
- student: here is a video of my friend getting arrested by a cop in riot gear for sitting on grass and singing
- fully grown adult: sharing this is tantamount to murder
- NYT: Our Campuses Have Become Warzones
- Jessica: M Y P U S S Y I N B
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I actually feel like I’m going insane. How am I supposed to think my finals matter at all right now
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@marshallvore
Fun fact! “The king is only playing a game of 4 dimensional chess” from Dylan Thomas was actually written about bon iver
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I don’t understand polyamory simply bcuz how are u attracted to that many people. And they all like you back ?
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Can’t explain why but they look like an old lesbian couple who live in Santa Barbara. one of them is a retired professor and the other is a social worker with some problematic outdated leftist politics but ultimately her heart is in the right place
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One time I genuinely thought I was experiencing a school shooting because I heard a loud bang and screams from the other room so I hid in the bathroom for 30 minutes but it turned out it was just my theater teacher doing the worm
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She’s about to knock you over trying to get barricade at Re:SET
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See the problem is I want to major in history but every time I write a paper my conclusion is always the scholarly equivalent of this emoji 🤷♀️
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Do u guys remember that Katie perry music video where she buzzes all her hair off and joins the army? Well anyway that’s what it feels like to get over a crush
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Guys I KNOW I was hacked on Instagram you don’t need to text me about it
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This is really important
Btw if I misspelled anyones name it’s because I do not care
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If I ever date someone and I start calling them “stink” just shoot me.
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Me after this weekend (I got two full nights of sleep in a row)
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Ins 2024:
- disappearing for weeks at a time
Outs 2024:
- search parties
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“Attended Harvard-Westlake” is absolutely killing me. NYT is getting involved in LA private high school drama. I’m so happy
someone at new york magazine really does not like ben platt 😭😭
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One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind
Literally all of my friends are now trying to get me my first kiss like it has become a NASA mission. We’re a team and unfortunately I’m a very poorly built rocket
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Now that I’m in my 20s can I please have a romantic interaction one time ? The character-building is over
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I cant explain it but this is what it feels like to wear my yale sweatshirt in public
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Oh shit he turned into a cat
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It’s so sad that I can’t ever taste the Tonight Dough ice cream or I’ll be disowned 😢
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Today I drove down the PCH with the windows down blasting Barbie World. And for a fleeting moment there I understood Los Angeles
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Something super weird always happens in April. Two years ago I got reallllly into belle and sebastian. Last year I developed a debilitating crush and started journaling obsessively. Can’t wait to see what’s in store!
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I need to stop using twitter
Sorry i cant hangout im too busy playing dress up conan o’brien on stardoll
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Need a magnolia bakery banana pudding and to experience teenage love before I turn 20 tbh
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fav things lately
- two to three desserts per day
- just not turning things in
- 30rock
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I am a girl in the way this gay cat is a girl
thinking about the gay lore of hello kitty and dear Daniel
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My mom and I finally had a heart to heart about the undiagnosed autism and ocd running rampant through both sides of the family. She seems unfazed
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The most beautiful girl in the world is not Bella Hadid. The most beautiful girl in the world is someone you will see once at an airport
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NEVE: well well well, my ten page paper is at seven pages! looks like progress!
[neve reads the seven pages]
NEVE: we oft throw around words like "progress," but what is the nature of progress, really, to mankind, but a fabrication of linearity,
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Forgot that being at college is just a constant state of stomach hurting
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My dad got my mom a tiny bronze statue of a boar for Christmas. I was skeptical at first but she loved it so much she started crying. She named it Beryl
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Instagram Reels
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Studies show that the worst possible thing that can happen to a human being is for their stomach to make a noise in class
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No no my hair isn’t greasy I’m just serving Football Player Who Just Stepped Out of the Shower No He Wasn’t Singing in There That Couldn’t Have Been Him… Could It? Well We Still Need a Lead for the School Musical since Jason Got Expelled and Besides he’s Kinda Cute…
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Those are jazz shoes I’m wearing.
U don’t know someone till Uve seen what their vibe was in 2016
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almost went into a brandy melville today and then remembered im a grown woman
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Every girl wrote this in her diary at the age of 12 and then moved on
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Ummm why is nobody talking about the problematic age gap between Humbert Humbert and Lolita???? :/
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Hopping back on twitter for 2 seconds to tell everyone it finally happened! When I looked up from my phone both me and the man who sirred me were so confused
Everyday I inch closer to the possibility that I’ll be he/himmed in some public forum
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I’m writing an essay so pretentious that it should get me beheaded in the courtyard of the humanities quadrangle
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@sikenpoems
@rileech8
What if I became violent. Would that make you happy. Is that why ur doing this.
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Desperately need to know what I look like but also I do not want to come into contact with that knowledge ever
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plans for the rest of the evening:
- learn how to produce beats
- read a work of irish literature
- once it gets dark, lie in the backyard with my headphones on and listen to country music and/or Rozes by the chainsmokers
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Me getting Diet Coke at the dining hall after a long hard day of 2 classes and some laundry
Jeremy Allen White photographed by Steven Klein for Vanity Fair
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Not religious in the slightest but I’m giving up social media for lent GOOTBYE
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Everyone complaining about Jeremy strong’s use of the word “dramaturgically” clearly does not have a playwright mother. I started hating that word at age ten
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I’m gonna start doing things like cutting up apples with a pocket knife and scribbling furtive notes in a tiny black notebook. I must cultivate a vaguely threatening aura
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Recently many women have been saying that they used to make their Barbies do weird messed-up things and/or have intercourse. Acting like this was a universal experience. Can I come clean? I would just line them up and sort their outfits by color
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An ancient Egyptian subtweeting Akhenaten during the Amarna period:
Sun Deity people give you so much shit if you worship the Moon Deity
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I’ve got lots of bangers in the drafts but I don’t want to separate them from each other … they’re having fun together in there
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When I have a crush now it’s just like ugh. For real? And then I get over it
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Not to participate in Discourse online but. the way Sam Smith continues to dress how they want despite constant horrific bullying is more radical than anything the people mocking them have ever done or will ever do
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I’m rapidly tweeting because I just realized my 10 page paper is due tomorrow and NOT Monday. So.
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Me pacing around my room every night doing fake Genius lyrics interviews
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This is the face and stance of someone who just saw James Corden get his latte first at the Brentwood blue bottle even though she ordered before him
In every photo shoot Kendall Jenner just looks like she wore a weird outfit to Blue Bottle and she’s waiting for them to make her latte
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I got ahold of a synth and I’ve started making the worst music known to man 🙏 look out world
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this is so beuatiful it's like if a bunny and a shrew were friends
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I wish someone would punt me like a football so I could sail through the air and triumphantly fly past the goal posts
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Being deeply in unrequited love between the ages of 15 and 18 is actually key
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Pictured here without the custom f slur key that she had added before writing Play It As It Lays
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Every man at this damn school
a heterosexual man who was not popular in high school performs his masculinity with more naïve camp than a drag artist could ever fathom
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Unlike some of you, I think of my digital footprint every time I tweet
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Every once in a while that clip of Joe Biden saying “SODA” pops into my head. And guys I can’t lie to you. I do have a giggle about it
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I want a cinnamon roll. But they are always drier and less cinnamon than you think they will be. This is the central problem in my life right now
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The class I’m taking is literally just Timothy Snyder: Into the Snyderverse. We have to read like every book he’s ever written.
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You wouldn’t last an hour in the context in which I live
You wouldn’t last an hour in the coconut tree I fell out of
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Nearly all of my failed college crushes thus far were collected in one place tonight and it felt like a really really bad season recap that no one needed
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I wish circles were still a thing so I could talk about some real ass situations
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I can’t stand the Harry Styles outfit discourse idc if ur praising him or hating on him it would be best if we all decided to ignore the man
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Why are the Schuyler sisters on stage with her
🚨| Taylor Swift perfoming “no body, no crime” with HAIM at tonight’s show of ‘The Eras Tour’!
#TSTheErasTour
#SantaClaraTSTheErasTour
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The fact that riverdale has seen me through my first year of middle school to my second year of college ❤️ I haven’t been watching but it’s nice to know it’s been around
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What if one person, could be both? Hi. My name is n
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