Comedy Writer/Improviser: BBC/BBC3/Comedy Central/R4/Sky. Also writes w/
@aliceetches
. Rep'd by a good egg (Michael Ford)
@hatch_talent
. I have very long toes.
Had a baby 5 weeks ago and I'm already back to my pre - pregnancy weight... AND she's sleeping through the night. Absolutely amazing what you can accomplish when you lie.
10 years ago I had all but £5 in my bank. My dream was to one day buy my own house with money I had made from being an artist. Today I'm picking up the keys to my friends house... so that I can feed her cat while she's on holiday. She's doing really well.
13 years ago I had all but £5 in my bank. My dream was to one day buy my own house with money I had made from being an artist. Today I'm picking up the keys to my friends house... so that I can feed her cat while she's on holiday. She's doing really well.
I used to deliver papers on a fancy estate. I remember looking at this one particular house & thinking "I'm going to own a home like that one day". Well, after 20 yrs of hard work I've just picked up the keys to that very house! Dream big folks & you too could be a cat-sitter.
Watched the final moments of the game w/my 16 month old girl - as the final whistle was being blown an emotional me whispered in her ear "just think one day that could be u standing there" (& I pointed to one of the fans). Bc I've seen her with a ball & yeah absolutely no chance.
if you've lost all hope. start writing posts like 'i'm a really sad but boy am i a good writer' and then start tagging really successful writers like
@edgarwright
they won't retweet you. But just keep going.
one last thing. A producer may say he'll only produce your script if you get into bed with him. Whatever you do DON'T sleep with him. Make sure it is just sex. Keep going!
if you're feeling lost and hopeless. Just have faith in your script! Eventually someone will read it and then they will ask you to write a free treatment/episodic breakdown/outline of entire series/movie. Then eventually they'll change their email address. Keep going!
2 years ago a producer told me I wasn't famous enough to star in a TV show that I had written. Well, joke is on him because I've just finished shooting my very first (starring AND written by me😍) fleet.
wow - yesterday you guys were all like "OH GOD I HAVE TOO MANY AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO GU with them all" - now you all have solutions. I see what's going on here.
To my teacher who said I wasn't a good writer. To my ex-boyfriend who said I should pick another career. To my old mentor who said that I should have a back up plan. I really hope they don't see this list as I'm not on it.
We are delighted to announce the 50 scripts and their writers which have made the longlist for our
#InterConnected
opportunity. Full details over on our blog
10 years ago I had all but £5 in my bank. My dream was to one day buy my own house with money I had made from being an artist. Today I'm picking up the keys to my friends house... so that I can feed her cat while she's on holiday. She's doing really well.
fun little story about the BAFTA's. a few years ago I met a struggling actor who said "I will win best actor one day" - last night Ben Whishaw won best actor and guess who that struggling actor was I met a few years ago? his name is tom and he didn't win, tom is super sad.
Just thinking about when someone sent me DM saying I was funny but ugly. I chose not to expose the person coz I knew they'd get a lot of hate for saying a woman was funny
@piersmorgan
I think you meant
Are ‘mental health issues’ now a valid excuse in elite sport?
Finally.
People used to just say "I did badly, made mistakes, and will strive to do better next time". Now they're saying their truth.
Kids have strong role models.
Finally.
If you'd told me a year ago that I'd be able to pay my rent 3 months in a row from money I'd made in writing comedy, I honestly wouldn't have believed you. And rightly so, because I'm not writing comedy and rent is very late.
2016 I was in an uber. My driver was sad as he'd just found out his gf cheated on him. A drunk me insisted we get out & hav a cigarette. We talked. He cried. We hugged. Then he left me a 4* review?? Still, I often think about that precious moment & hope he still gets cheated on.
30 weeks pregnant today... and just imagining a time when she's older and I'm hanging with her and her friends, and right before we meet them she gives me a sweet hug and whispers in my ear "please take a night off from talking about how you were pregnant in a pandemic".
Y do ppl say writing TV comedy is hard? Literally all u need to do is create an A, B, C plot that intertwine/compliment/support one another w/likable/original but relatable characters who are motivated by things you can't mention and also set up a world but get to the hook ASAP.
Question.
WHY is the narrative that Megan Markle's father is the victim?
Just watched an interview with him on
@GMB
and he is quite literally insulting his child over and over and over.
Leaving Richard,
@susannareid100
@reallorraine
saying they feel sorry for him
Help?
*stop scrolling babes I've got some news*
I'm going to set up a TV Pilot Club {on zoom}. A place where we can see YOUR scripts come to life.
We will do a live read of 3/4 x comedy pilots every month -- submitted & written by YOU.
If you want to be involved DM me.
1/3
another clear vibe i'm getting is - you guys are incredibly protective of your Gu pots. But I'm sorry to say, not one person has justified why you need 526 of them.
8 years ago to the day i set a goal to buy my very own place with money i had made from being a writer. i've just picked up the keys to my first ever storage unit where i will be leaving my stuff for some time because i can't afford to live and must move back in with my parents.
A lot of people talk about the tweet that gained them lots of followers. I'd like to talk about the one that lost me a lot followers.
Join in if you wish.
8 years ago to the day i set a goal to buy my very own place with money i had made from being a writer. i've just picked up the keys to my first ever storage unit where i will be leaving my stuff for some time because i can't afford to live and must move back in with my parents.
if you'd told me 10 years ago that i'd be sipping on nice wine in a house that i own, while writing on my favourite TV show. I honestly wouldn't have believed you. And rightly so, coz right now i'm sipping on lambrini, rent is late and instead of a TV show i'm writing this tweet.
8 years ago to the day i set a goal to buy my very own place with money i had made from being an artist. i've just picked up the keys to my first ever storage unit where i will be leaving my stuff for some time because i can't afford to live and must move back in with my parents.
i once dated an irish guy called carl. i will never forget we were at dinner and he said for the first time "here's to love at first sight" - i was so taken back & said "yes YES... i love you too". then realised he was talking to his pint of guinness. whatever it's fine.
if you'd told me 10 years ago that i'd be sipping on nice wine in a house that i own, while writing on my favourite TV show. I honestly wouldn't have believed you. And rightly so, coz right now i'm sipping on lambrini, rent is late and instead of a TV show i'm writing this tweet.
My friend Tom sent a TV script to a producer 16 years ago. He didn't hear anything and assumed nothing would come of it. Sixteen years later... SIXTEEN BLOODY YEARS LATER moments before Tom is about to give up... guess what happens? Nothing. He gave up. Tom is super sad.
I thought being preggers in a global pandemic was as bad as it could get... I can confirm being tested positive for covid in a global pandemic is worse. Please send healing powers and positive stories. (no dick pics). 😘
when i was 22 someone told me i wouldn't make it as an actress because of the bump in my nose and the gaps in my teeth. well, if only they could see me now...
about to star in my very own instagram story.
My friend Tom sent a TV script to a producer 16 years ago. He didn't hear anything and assumed nothing would come of it. Sixteen years later... SIXTEEN BLOODY YEARS LATER moments before Tom is about to give up... guess what happens? Nothing. He gave up. Tom is super sad.
Mad to think this time last year I had a comedy script I wanted to sell. Now I sit here in my lounge seeing that very script on the tv (we used it as wrapping paper for my daughter’s present).
Just thinking about when someone sent me DM saying I was funny but ugly. I chose not to expose the person coz I knew they'd get a lot of hate for saying a woman was funny.
My therpist has now forgotten about two of our sessions. The first time, I was left standing in the rain, and the second, I was left sitting on zoom. I'm thinking now, this is probably what she meant when she told me she specialised in abandonment issues.
I have some positive news regarding a script I’ve been working on for 5 years. FYI: This script received over 100 rejections but I kept going because I believed in it. Well!! I’ve just sold my car coz I needed money to live so that I can keep sending it to ppl. YES! Keep going!
2016 I was in an uber. My driver was sad as he'd just found out his gf cheated on him. A drunk me insisted we get out & hav a cigarette. We talked. He cried. We hugged. Then he left me a 4* review?? Still, I often think about that precious moment & hope he still gets cheated on.