meep
@mummabryan
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25. She/her. I’m a hater first and a mother second.
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Joined December 2014
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I’m begging y’all to remember that you’re naming people, not just babies. A 17 year old will have that name, a 28 year old will have that name, a 43 year old will have that name, a 77 year old grandparent will have that name. Maybe we should rethink choosing McKeinsleigh Graycynn
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Yes I’m shaming. Wanting a less common name is cool but naming your child Kitchenaid Whiskey Jones is borderline abuse.
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@PaperCakes
Adults shouldn’t have to pay hundreds of dollars to change their name because their parents named them something ridiculous.
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if you hit your children and think it’s okay because you tell them why you did it after and hug them, you are delusional. if your husband hit you and then told you why he hit you and hugged you after, he’d be an abuser. you are an abuser. an apology without change is manipulation
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The only people mad about this are people who names their kid something obscure and stupid and the way y’all react says everything about that internal guilt because you’re already dealing with the repercussions of your actions.
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Lost a friend because she “didn’t like how my husband treated me like a spoiled princess” sorry my husband likes me????
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This does not include, and has not ever included, cultural names from any culture (including black culture) in case anyone wanted to use this tweet as an excuse to be racist. I have never, and will never, speak on names from cultures I don’t belong to. This is @ white people only
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@mamamorgann
And then they backwash into all our drinks for the next 3-5 years with NO cool benefits
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Hi twitter i’m 3 years clean and sober from crack cocaine today🎊🎉 feeling very grateful and happy and healthy❤️
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SAHM’s absolutely DO contribute to their families financially. Bringing money in is not the only way to contribute. I save my family over $700/WEEK by being the one to care for our children during the day. I am contributing financially even without a “job”
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my kid just spilled a full drink on my $2000 computer. want to know what i did? put her in her crib and cleaned the mess. even though i was angry i still didn’t beat her because i understand it was my fault for not watching her closely enough and leaving it within her reach.
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this girl i know is pregnant with her 3rd kid by her 3rd baby daddy which wouldn’t be an issue except she’s been married the whole time and her husband thinks all the kids are his💀
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I literally called 911 because one of my twins was missing. I didn’t have twins.
Not to stir the parenting discourse pot but:
The sleep deprivation is fine. It’s totally fine. You suck it up and then it’s over. Grow up.
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Access to abortion doesn’t effect me personally. Trans healthcare rights do not effect me personally. Immigration policies do not effect me personally. But they effect people I love, and even people I don’t know. And even if it doesn’t effect me. I’ll vote for what’s right.
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One thing about me, I love soda. Dr. Pepper? Literally the most immaculate drink I’ve ever had. I love soda. The carbonation, the flavor. I love all soda. I love dark soda. I don’t care how bad it is for me I love it and I will never stop drinking it.
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okay BUT his family doesn’t know we have a baby together. what if i post on facebook “happy birthday, thanks for the baby” on his profile to cause drama LMFAO HAPPY BIRTHDAY STUPID BITCH
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hey if you’re currently pregnant and don’t have any other children to care for TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT. TAKE A NAP. LAY ON THE COUCH. DO WHATEVER YOU WANT. IM SO TIRED. EVERYTHING HURTS. MY TODDLER RUNS MY LIFE.
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@littlebillie
@PaperCakes
Changing names because of marriage is a different legal process than changing your name just because. Changing my name for marriage was free and easy, my friend changing her name because she wanted to was costly and she had numerous hoops to jump through.
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my husband may be the breadwinner but i’m literally the head of the household. that man makes the money but literally never has a single clue how much is in our account, when our bills are due and for how much. i take care of it all.
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I spent 7 hours in the ER last night for extremely heavy vaginal bleeding after sexual contact and they spent the entire 7 hours trying to convince me it was just my period and I didn’t realize it. I’m on birth control, nowhere near my period, and I had a baby 2 month ago.
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white people use ranch seasoning and a block of cream cheese in any recipe and it automatically becomes “crack”
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i just birthed a baby unmedicated and i will NEVER do that shit again lol
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@Rg2E3
You know exactly what white people, don’t go hunting for an argument at 8 am. Touch some grass.
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is it a dad thing to not put the baby’s pants back on after a diaper change or is my husband just lazy lol
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here’s a friendly reminder to WASH. YOUR. SCRUNCHIES. They are cloth, they get gross. they’re absorbing the dirt and oils in your hair, if you wear them while you workout, they’re full of SWEAT. WASH THEM. JUST DO IT.
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y’all are ✨insane✨ if you think i’m buying my toddler an IPAD.
I’m buying her an $80 kids tablet off amazon because i’m ✨cheap✨
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@ARIESVENUS333
@lelynoelia
Girl on tiktok literally named her kid whiskey and said people were shaming her for it. Like no bestie, you’re setting your kid up for a lifetime of jokes, an association with alcohol and therapy. Name him Eugene or something he’ll be ight
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@alissassilla
My postpartum nurse for my last baby’s name was Laughryn (pronounced Lauren) it took everything in me not to ask if she still talked to her mom lol
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Kinda outed myself with that joke, but for everyone that knows me irl, we aren’t announcing for another few weeks so 🤫
Baby
#2
coming August 2021❤️
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i did it lmfao
okay BUT his family doesn’t know we have a baby together. what if i post on facebook “happy birthday, thanks for the baby” on his profile to cause drama LMFAO HAPPY BIRTHDAY STUPID BITCH
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Can we please stop acting surprised when men actually enjoy being around their children? I’m so tired of hearing “oh wow, he’s so good with them” or “he spends so much time with them” like yeah he’s their FATHER. The bar is in HELL for these men.
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Baby formula at the grocery store has better security than the US Capitol
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I do not fuck with observed holidays. There’s no reason my doctors office should be closed today for a holiday that happened yesterday, that they already had the day off for. What could you be celebrating today? Answer the phone!!!
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maybe if you bitches weren’t calling cps on people just because you didn’t like them, the system wouldn’t be so strained and kids like Gabriel Fernandez could’ve been saved.
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Like I fully remember waking up and panicking because I couldn’t find my second baby. My baby was a few weeks old and I only ever had one baby but I was so sure I had 2 because I was so fucking tired.
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this girl posted “where can i get a vaccine card”
at the pharmacy baby and they’ll even give you the vaccine for free with it lol
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i think im gonna put my BD on child support. i was so against it for a while personally for myself, but i’m sick of having all of this responsibility and struggling at 21 years old while her 35 year old father gets to do whatever he pleases.
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PLEASE SHARE❗️❗️ My little brother is missing in the upstate New York area. He was last seen in the Colonie area around 1pm today (5/12). His name is Mike Thomas. Please call me Mikey I love you so much. Please be okay.
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It’s always wild to me that people get pregnant using the pull out method like I know it’s definitely not 100% but i don’t have any sort of issue with fertility and I’ve been relying on that hoe for YEARS and only got pregnant when we deliberately didn’t pull out on ovulation day
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i’ve called unemployment 29 times already. everytime they say “we’re experiencing a high volume of calls, call back later” and hang up on me. i’ve been out of work for 2 weeks. i have bills. it’s already gonna take weeks to get a check. i’m frustrated.
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@OKAYYYWOWWW
Like I am so sorry your man doesn’t do that for you babe but that is not my problem
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Not to mention my blood pressure was extremely high twice and no one told me and they kept referring to my bleeding as “my period” even though i know for a 100% fact it’s not my period. Did I mention I have precancerous cells in my cervix and heavy bleeding is a sign of cancer?
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it’s a beautiful day for Joe Biden to give me the $2000 he owes me
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My local police do car seat checks regularly and I’m very tempted to install my car seats wrong (without my kids in them of course) and take them to the checks to see if they actually know what they’re doing
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I’ve had sex with 58 people and I can count more times where a man has put his dick in my asshole without asking me more than the times a man has even asked me for basic consent. The problem here is not my body count, the problem here is the lack of basic consent.
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one of my best friends blocked me on all social media because his girlfriend of 3 months said so. we’ve always been completely platonic and we saw each other almost everyday until he started dating this girl. i blocked him back and i’ll never talk to him again.
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my full blown addiction to crack started by “just a little coke on the weekends🤪” and next thing i knew i was overdosing in a strangers bathroom at 7pm on a tuesday. it’s not cute. it’s not quirky. it’s not even that fun. it’s not worth it.
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Hi I’ve been sober from crack and cocaine for 4 years today and I’m very blessed and happy to see my life where it is now :) I never thought I’d be here and it feels so good
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Did y’all see the mother in Atlanta that had her baby decapitated during a shoulder dystocia because the provider pulled on the baby’s head with extreme force and then THEY HID THAT THE BABY HAD NO HEAD FROM THE PARENTS
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@tinaaabean_
White people very mad at this one lol there are many beautiful names that don’t have to be like….that lol
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My baby father: *ignores me for a week after I tell him we’re not getting back together*
My baby father: *ignores every picture and message i send about our baby*
My baby father as soon as he feels lonely for 3 seconds:
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do you ever beg your child to go to sleep and then after they fall asleep you stay up all night with mom guilt bc anything can happen while they sleep and you have to watch their every breath now bc you’re afraid you may have cut your last moments with them short? no? just me?
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hey just so everyone knows, i think all of you are like 23. i know you’re married with 4 children and one of them is 11. i still think you’re like 23. everyone on this app is 23 and you cannot change my mind. no, i don’t know why i think this but i do lol
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people literally leaving their kids home alone to party and i get too nervous to walk to the mailbox while my kids are napping
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my baby father is mad that my man is around my daughter but like..sir YOU are not even around your daughter. you are not an active parent you have no say
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i lowkey used to think “why can’t SAHM clean their house while they have the baby?” because when I had my baby on weekends I would clean my house. now that i’m home everyday with her, I understand. my house is a mess. send help. i’m so sorry i used to be an asshole😭 i understand
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Also we got engaged (he tried to get me to get my nails done last week but i didn’t want to lol) it’s been a very merry christmas in our house this year ❤️
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there’s no excuse to use violence on young children. my 1 year old cannot comprehend what she did. she can’t understand what she did wrong. it’s my job to teach her and watch her. not to scare her and abuse her. it was my fault, i left it within her reach. EYE need to do better.
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Edible cookie dough does not hit like regular cookie dough. The risk of salmonella is really what makes the flavor
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It’s so whack to me that they just let anyone have a baby. If you can get pregnant/get someone pregnant they just let you do it and that’s ape shit to me. Being a parent is the hardest, most challenging task I’ve ever done and I am tested everyday.
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please don’t do this. they will mold faster than you can use them, and with soap you’ll dry out baby’s skin FAST. buy a cheap fleece blanket from walmart and cut it up into squares. carry a water bottle around and only wet the wipes right before you use them. WATER ONLY!! 😘
Make your own wipes mama’s💛
• 1 roll of paper towels
• 4 cups of hot water
• 4 tablespoons of baby wash
• 2 tablespoons of baby oil
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Muting this because the notifications keep interrupting my podcast lol. But yes, I would want to be me if I was her too🫶🏼
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i will say the worst part about being a mom is desperately needing a break just to not be touched or sleep or anything without your kids but not being able to enjoy it without constantly worrying about them and checking in on them. i want PEACE god dammit
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i am all for you being able to choose which birth option is best for you, but seeing first time moms talk about wanting an elective c section because “they can’t handle pain” is bonkers to me. like yes vaginal birth can be painful but you’re literally having abdominal surgery
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i really hate that people try to create the narrative that being afraid of covid is a bad thing. like yes, i am afraid of a virus that is killing hundreds of thousands of people with no rhyme or reason and now our country has no hospital beds left for accidents or other illness🥴
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Finally got a neuro consult after 2 years and they got me in fast due to a cancellation and the nurse said “don’t worry, I believe you. We’re going to listen to you here” and i immediately started sobbing.
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Everytime someone in my BLW Facebook group mentions not giving their kids goldfish crackers because of the sodium content it reminds me that there are people who actively track their children’s sodium and sugar and protein intake and that is wild to me
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sorry i don’t enjoy alcoholic bread soda that makes you gain weight and feel like garbage
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TW// ED
eating disorders are not cute and quirky. eating disorders are not “oops i forgot to eat dinner”. this is my food for the next WEEK. my body doesn’t know how to digest solid food anymore. I can’t eat without violently rejecting any food i try to eat.
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i don’t wanna hear any “i was beat and i’m fine” or “i hit my kid and they’re fine”. i don’t care. this is MY view, this is MY opinion and this is MY child.
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I’m sorry but calling your boyfriend of 3 weeks your kids “second dad” when their father is active is WILD
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I’ve been with my husband for 4 years and I am literally still obsessed with him and in love like I was when we first met and I am so happy to have found a love like his
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@Rainbowho77
@tierbilyou
if your spouse hit you but only a couple of times to make you “straighten up” you wouldn’t say it’s done out of love. violence never comes from love.
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lolol scrolled through facebook and got an ad for my old OBGYN and couldn’t resist putting them on blast for everything they did to me.
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Thinking about the time my husbands ex tried to tell him that her baby might be his to try to get him back and when he called and said “let’s take a DNA test and if he’s mine, Sarah and I will get 50/50 custody” she switched it up and said she knew it wasn’t his lol
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My grandma has dementia and I don’t think she comprehends that my oldest child is biologically not my husbands (and is black) and she’s always like “wow isn’t it funny how Hayley has dark curly hair and dark eyes and the other kids have straight blonde hair and light eyes?”
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Strapping your kid into a car seat is literally the easiest part of parenthood, so why are y’all not doing it correctly?
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I got invited to a birthday party and they also invited my incredibly abusive ex, and they know what happened. Bestie-
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Went through my budget again to try to see where I could cut back spending. I literally can’t. It’s all bills. I cancelled my $10 paramount+ subscription but that’s it. 2 income household paycheck to paycheck on just bills. We spend $100 a week on groceries already.
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my local high school changed their start time from 7:40 am to 8:40am because research shows better academic outcomes and boomers are so mad??? they’re all saying we’re “coddling kids so they can stay up all night and play video games” Jerry, it’s 1 hour
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my father, a believer in corporal punishment, just witnessed my daughter have her first actual tantrum and watched how i choose to handle those situations. This man who believes spanking was always the way just walked out of my house understanding why i refuse to hit my child.
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my ex just texted me asking if he could vent to me about his life. i said sure and he’s complaining about all the bullshit his girlfriend put him through like he didn’t do that exact same shit to me but also like 1000x worse lol hows your karma bro
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Did any of these mom influencers think that maybe part of the reason it takes 45 minutes to put their baby to sleep is because they’re shining a bright ass light in its face at 2am to make content or
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landlords really have the audacity to require someone to make 4x the rent in order to live there. baby i promise someone making $8K a month is not living in your fucking apartment they’re buying a house.
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gentle parenting is very hard and i am very mediocre at it but that’s better than not doing it at all (for me) and as long as my kid becomes a kind adult that’s all i care about.
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landlords really got some audacity asking for $1600 for a 2 bedroom with no utilities included and not allow pets.
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i really hate how young parents try and act like having a child at a young age didnt effect them at all and it only made their entire life better. And once I acknowledge the negative aspects of having a child young i must “regret my kid”. having kids is never always happy.
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oh by the way, i asked what his child’s name was and he got it wrong twice and then blocked my phone number LMFAO
My baby father: *ignores me for a week after I tell him we’re not getting back together*
My baby father: *ignores every picture and message i send about our baby*
My baby father as soon as he feels lonely for 3 seconds:
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prepared for chaos, only one lone protester showed up to the NY Capitol in Albany. This is the funniest thing i’ve ever seen.
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@millymichelle
Should’ve added it to the thread last night but I figured it was a given with the name I chose in the tweet. Apologies if it came across any other way.
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all is well here
this dude sent me 9 tinder messages in the span of 30 seconds i’m scared to open them lol
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if you don’t give me “the wave” after i let you in in traffic i’m fucking rear ending you
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