Jay Kristoff News/Updates
@misterkristoff
Followers
44,272
Following
430
Media
3,404
Statuses
67,998
#1 International, NYT, USAToday and Sunday Times bestselling liar. You're better off following me on instagram. EMPIRE OF THE DAMNED - Out Now.
Straya
Joined April 2010
Don't wanna be here?
Send us removal request.
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
#BizimÇocuklar
• 332031 Tweets
Mert
• 246486 Tweets
Colômbia
• 211894 Tweets
Epstein
• 203067 Tweets
Avusturya
• 202904 Tweets
Hunter
• 201697 Tweets
Merih
• 198075 Tweets
Kamala
• 140772 Tweets
Harris
• 140337 Tweets
Austria
• 140033 Tweets
#AUTvTUR
• 129039 Tweets
Xbox
• 123520 Tweets
تركيا
• 120659 Tweets
Arda Güler
• 98219 Tweets
Ferdi
• 67064 Tweets
Kenan
• 57251 Tweets
Hollanda
• 51799 Tweets
NE MUTLU TÜRKÜM DİYENE
• 50624 Tweets
Bozkurt
• 48637 Tweets
CIRCO RODAS FURIOSO
• 44095 Tweets
新紙幣発行
• 43083 Tweets
Barış Alper
• 34958 Tweets
#Turkey
• 31809 Tweets
渋沢栄一
• 29919 Tweets
هولندا
• 29135 Tweets
タイムテーブル
• 29051 Tweets
Montella
• 28147 Tweets
CATA TIENE AGUANTE
• 25670 Tweets
Çeyrek Finaldeyiz
• 23252 Tweets
HOY VUELVE LUCHI
• 20627 Tweets
Roger Waters
• 14410 Tweets
TIAGO PZK
• 13713 Tweets
Didi
• 13505 Tweets
Orkun
• 12668 Tweets
#WWENXT
• 10790 Tweets
Pinned Tweet
This one goes out to my enemies. To the haters and clout-chasers. To the fair-weather friends, and those who never bothered to pretend. To everyone who told me “You can’t. You won’t. Don’t even try.”
I couldn’t have done it without you. ❤️
25
45
510
{\__/}
( • . •)
/ > > i have returned, my dark master
{\__/}
( • . •)
/ >🙃 here is the head of thine enemy
{\__/}
( • - •)
/ >🙃 no i didn't get your text
{\__/}
( • - •)
/ >🙃 shit
{\__/}
( • - •)
/ >🙃 well what am i supposed to do with it then
54
5K
20K
A trans reader came to a DARKDAWN launch with a copy of NEVERNIGHT I’d signed back in 2016. Had me cross out their deadname, replace it with their chosen name, then looked me in the eye and said “I wouldn’t be here if not for this book.”
Moment like that changes your life
What's the nicest thing anyone has ever said about your writing?
526
64
500
27
421
5K
Dunno who needs to hear this, but I was 35 years old before I wrote my first novel.
I was 42 the first time I hit the NYT bestseller list.
So don't panic if you haven't figured out what you're good at yet 🖤
71
723
5K
This is a coconut crab. They grow up to 3 feet in length. A group of them is called a "nightmare".
You're welcome.
74
1K
4K
Not sure who needs to hear this. But here goes.
Ten years ago, I was working a dead end job, writing a book in secret and feeling stupid for even bothering, querying agents with no real hope of getting published and shooting a million to one in the dark.
95
676
4K
J.R.R Tolkien died in 1973. Reverse that number, you get 3791.
3 rings for the elven kings under the sky
7 for the dwarf lords in their halls of stone
9 for mortal men, doomed to die
1 for the dark lord on his dark throne
😮
79
880
3K
My wife has stopped calling it her "To Do List" and started calling it her "Quest Log" and this is why I married her
22
231
3K
Every novel you ever loved was at one point HATED by the person writing it.
27
496
3K
PSA: I have decided there will be 7 more days in February, so we can all get the shit we were supposed to have done by the end of month actually done.
We will be stealing these days from August, because honestly who gives a FUCK about August.
Thank you for your attention.
67
214
2K
I’ve said it before, but anyone working in YA today owes Stephenie Meyer a massive debt. The Twilight books (and HP) brought an entire generation of people back/into reading, and many of them stayed
(Still on my boy Damon tho, just sayin)
52
267
2K
Get an agent, you'll be happy
Get a bookdeal, you'll be happy
Get a NYT bestseller, you'll be happy
Get a movie/tv show, you'll be happy
Buy a castle next to Rowling, you'll be happy
Goals are fine, but writers, find happy in your WORDS. Because what you do is amazing
18
365
2K
*sung to the tune of happy birthday*
Nevernight's not YA.
Nevernight's not YA.
Nevernight. Is. Not. WHY. AYYYYYYYYY.
Nevernight's not YA.
44
213
2K
Today I got asked “Why are all the main characters in your books female?”
I get asked this a lot. Mostly by dudes. It’s a really odd question.
41
509
2K
Writing smut scenes is always kinda weird
Getting copyeditor's notes on your smut is definitely weird
Listening to an audiobook narrator read your smut aloud is suuuper weird
But knowing your mum will read your smut is the weirdest
34
124
2K
Why are all my main characters female?
Well, why the fuck not?
38
284
2K
Dear autocorrect
Nobody EVER means "ducking".
29
240
2K
Do not tolerate people who stand in the way of your dream.
Do not let anyone tell you that you are wasting your time.
Do not sleep.
Do not flinch.
Do not take no for an answer.
7
230
2K
This is your annual reminder that there's a storm at Saturn's pole that's bigger than the diameter of the earth and shaped like a fucking hexagon and we have no idea why
34
338
2K
My wife and I never baby talk to our son. After his sitter went missing, we learned not to incur his ire.
My son is 3 and can carry on a full conversation with Elder Ones beyond the edge of time and sanity. My daughter is 2 and already knows the song that will unmake the world.
My wife and I never baby talk to our kids. We use full sentences and a wide vocabulary including complex words.
My son is 3 and can carry a full conversation. Adults at family gatherings are shocked at his social aptitude. My daughter isn’t even 2 and she uses 4-syllable words.
2K
18K
85K
18
116
1K
Dear rando,
Asking me what people will think of my tattoos when I’m 70 assumes I care what people think now.
🖤
38
136
1K
The below image was used as cover art for a foreign digital edition of EMPIRE OF THE VAMPIRE. It’s very cool. It’s also created by a Generative Large Language Model (GLLM), commonly referred to as AI. (1/?)
47
358
1K
There are many ways to show that the character in the book or movie you’re making is gay
Precisely none of them involve the special features section of the DVD
13
203
1K
Me: “Hi, I am an internationally bestselling, multi-award winning science-fiction/fantasy novelist with m—“
Anyone: “Oh yeah? Spell ‘bureaucracy’ without a dictionary for me, motherfucker.”
Me: “...”
Anyone: “Okay, how about ‘received’ then, big man?”
Me: “I’ll go away now.”
21
80
1K
To everyone out there who has ever recommended one of my books to a friend, written a review, posted a vid, created art, or pushed it into a stranger's face and demand they read it, thank you.
You do more than you'll ever understand, and I couldn't do this without you.🖤🤘🏻
47
70
1K
Hey you.
Yes, you.
Get the fuck off twitter and go make something amazing.
65
263
1K
If you're calling Mia a "cunt" in your review and intend it as anything other than a compliment, congratulations, you have officially missed the entire point of the Nevernight Chronicle
😘
22
74
1K
You only get one life.
You only get one shot.
So shoot.
20
139
1K
tfw when you've got all these notebooks and need to take notes but the notebooks are all too pretty to write your crappy notes in
37
186
1K
They say the best revenge is living well, but there’s still a lot to be said for dancing beneath a blood moon in a cloak made of your enemy’s skin
14
199
1K
Kinda weird watching people lose their minds about a movie award show when the president of the free world is awaiting trial for obstruction/abuse of power and my country is still on fire
28
178
1K
First author copy of DARKDAWN arrived today. The feeling of finally holding a thing you put years of your life into in the palm of your hand never gets any less surreal 😃⚔️☠️
#stabtember
#stabstabstab
49
62
1K
I just found out I've had a typo in my instagram bio for the past year and none of you bastards said anything, so you're all dead to me
43
39
1K
I’ve recently learned that some people pronounce it “nootella” even though it’s made from nuts and there’s pictures of nuts right there on the fucking jar and every day we stray further from god’s light
106
116
1K
I wasn’t a fan of the early episodes but I gotta say, the 2020 season finale is shaping up
15
133
1K
I’ve just spent ten weeks traveling overseas and met thousands of incredible readers and had an amazing DARKDAWN launch and worked on my next book for a month in a beautiful mysterious city and I’m fully cognizant of how lucky I am but GODDAMN IT IS GOOD TO BE HOME
18
20
1K
PSA: Every book you’ve ever loved started as a shitty first draft.
11
297
1K
tfw you realise it's your job to put serious thought into how vampires achieve erections
46
80
1K
Dear writers
How about you put whatever the fuck you like in your fucking book and let everyone else do the fucking same
27
154
1K
Dear American friends,
I speak for the rest of the civilized world when I say
19
67
1K
I never thought I'd say this
but
I think I might actually finish writing this book today
15
16
1K
Dear America
Centimeters are awesome, you should try them.
Luv
The rest of humanity
33
138
1K
Three things, m8:
1. It's going to be considerably more than 400 pages.
2. I haven't finished writing it yet.
3. Please eat a whole bag of dicks.
[PDF] Free Download Empire of the Vampire (Empire of the Vampire
#1
) by Jay Kristoff
Empire of the Vampire Jay Kristoff PDF
400 pages
September 2021 by Harper Voyager
Empire of the Vampire
ISBN 0008350434
File Size 40Mb
Click Here :
4
0
1
22
50
1K
News is up droogs! AURORA RISING is coming to TV 😀🚀💫
42
180
1K
Dear writers,
Never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never throw anything away
Dross can become gold with time and perspective
24
163
1K
That moment of crushing panic you feel when you open your manuscript to discover all the work you've done this week is missing . . .
. . . only to realize you opened an old version of the doc and everything is okay now, oh thank you baby robot jesus, it's okay now oh god
16
39
1K
Have we learned NOTHING
DeVos announced a new “virtual assistant” — named “Aidan” — that will help answer students’ questions about federal financial aid.
(Aidan also appears to be an owl)
5
1
14
56
141
1K
You ever have that thing where you look at a word you know is right but it just looks wrong? Like, have they always spelled "know" like that? That can't be right, can it? "Know"? That's not a fucking word
52
85
1K
Instead of trying to convince you how great my book is, I thought I could share some of the stick I get for it while just pointing out it’s really cheap rn.
I get at least one of these emails a month.
PS: Nevernight is not YA
PPS: it’s really cheap rn
48
154
1K
Ehhhh I'm sick of bleating about it, let the little fuckers find out for themselves
24
51
1K
This equation is simple, people. You can have one of two worlds:
1. A world where regular people can make a living making art
2. A world where art becomes the sole province of people so rich that they don't need income from it
If you want 1, pay for art
If you want 2, steal it
Books (and authors) with low sales get especially hurt by piracy.
I understand the money and location/country argument. I really do. But just consider before you hit download: "Do I want more books by this author?" If the answer is yes, then look for other ways to read the book.
14
182
597
9
303
1K
Listen, if you're waiting for the author you love to finish the series you love, that's awesome. The author appreciates that you love them. But there are millions of awesome things you could do while you wait, and telling the author to hurry up is precisely none of them 🖤
19
137
1K
Dear Internet,
The fact you do not like a Thing does not make the Thing bad.
Hugs and kisses
J
11
210
1K
Just once in a drama, I want the expert to say "I can have that finished in four hours" and the person giving orders to snap back "Make it two" and the expert to say "No, listen motherfucker, I have a doctorate of Getting Shit Done from Fuck You University and I said FOUR."
11
106
1K
Thank you for teaching a teenage kid that it was ok to be different, that with great power comes great responsibility, that we all have it within us to be heroes. You honestly changed my life.
Excelsior, Mr Stan Lee. You'll be missed 🖤
5
202
1K
This is my “ready for Tric” look
23
68
1K
It's a strange feeling, coming back to a manuscript you haven't touched in six months and seeing things you don't remember writing and saying to yourself "that's actually pretty good" 😂
13
46
1K
PSA
Nevernight is not a YA novel
Nevernight is not a YA novel
Nevernight is not a YA novel
Nevernight is not a YA novel
Nevernight is not a YA novel
Nevernight is not a YA novel
Nevernight is not a YA novel
Nevernight is not a YA novel
Nevernight is not a YA novel
Nevernight is n
39
156
1K
Ever heard of a book so goddamn fancy it has 4 different US ARCs?
Well, now you have. 🙂
Who wants the chance to win all 4?
#eotv
🖤⚔️🦇
168
75
1K
You know you've made it when people are pirating a book that you haven't actually finished writing yet
Someone wanna click the link and tell me how it ends?
28
56
1K
wtf did i do
#HappyWorldBookDay
to the books who love us back... but also the ones who stab us through the heart and leave us for dead. Looking at you
@misterkristoff
. 👀
4
73
279
30
78
994
31
262
990
Dear American friends
I say this with love but on behalf of the rest of the planet I really hope you fucking vote tomorrow.
13
174
974
Before I drank coffee I used to think anyone who tweeted about how much they loved coffee was just a wanker, but now I drink coffee, fuck I love coffee
28
89
970
yeah sex is cool but have you ever been a mongolian shepherd with an assault rifle and a pet snow leopard
22
81
965
The biggest difficulty with writing love triangles is, if you do your job properly, half your readers are going to end up disappointed.
26
35
961
IT HAS ALREADY BEEN DONE
IT WAS DONE SO WELL IT WON A FUCKING ACADEMY AWARD
THERE ARE A MILLION NEW AND ORIGINAL IDEAS OUT THERE
MAKE ONE OF THOSE
YOU
LAZY
FUCKS
24
229
946
Well . . .
The MC is a bitch and SUCH a Mary Sue
She smokes, drinks and swears
It has footnotes
Also a bj
And many. Sentence fragments.
I like weird metaphors
She doesn't even get to the assassin school til page 100 what the fuck
@misterkristoff
Just purchased the two first books in
#thenevernightchronicle
, anything I should know before I start? 😁🤘🏻
0
0
8
20
80
949
My dad told me that the ice cream truck only played music when it was out of ice cream and I fucking believed him
30
51
942
Achievement unlocked: Trilogy complete 🙂⚔️☠️
.
It was a ride, droogs, and I’m sad it’s over. Thanks for coming along. Thanks for the fanart, the tattoos, the letters, the poetry, the funkos, the other amazing gifts.…
27
43
936
Today I hit the NYT bestseller list for the 5th time straight.
3
25
929
“I am a daughter of the dark between the stars. I am the thought that wakes the bastards of this world sweating in the nevernight. I am the vengeance of every orphaned daughter, every murdered mother, every bastard son.
I am the war you cannot win.”
Only 2 months 26 days 9 hours 57 minutes left until
#Darkdawn
by
@misterkristoff
releases!
#stabstabstab
0
3
17
22
133
929
I think this is the first ARC I’ve ever seen with a four letter word on the cover
My mum would be so proud
30
58
929
Never apologize for your ambition. Never apologize for deciding “this is not enough”.
At the heart of every great artist is the need for something MORE
7
211
927
i occasionally feel like watching Game of Thrones again but every time I do I remember season 8 and i'm like
46
112
923
Some days the pages flow like water.
Some days every word is a war.
Keep writing.
7
187
903
I watched all 8 episodes of The Witcher and I still have no fuckin idea how mages work - a novel by Jay Kristoff
16
26
903