Pediatrician: Does he respond to his name?
Me: I guess?
Pediatrician: Do you call him by his name?
Me: Oh sure, Jonah
Pediatrician: Good because...
Me (cont): Jonah, Jonie, Jonie Baloney, Jonus Balonus, Post Balones, Cutie Patootie, Cutus Patootus, Dr Patootus, Lord Chubbington