A Liar and a Gentleman
@llkool_jay
Followers
859
Following
539
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Statuses
29,498
“This whole story is completely true. Except for all the parts that are totally made up.”
Joined May 2011
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That nug you find under the couch:
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Boi dressed like a AAU mom
...And on top of not knowing how to dress, y'all don't know how to shop either
See this right here? WHOLE fit came from Ross, including the shoes...
Nigga Nike down for UNDER $100 dollars, ain't no excuse!
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@D_1andOnly_
They held you down. This is real currency. Adjusted for inflation, you sitting on $250 easy.
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@___inCANdescent
Can we also:
-remove “Work History” from applications
-Include salary ranges on job posting
-end drug test for herb
-end “work attire”
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She said
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@Lifeofsimonee_
@___inCANdescent
For customer facing jobs, yes. Anything else can be done just as effectively in my drawers.
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@cooly_bobby
@Notdojaaa
He has an average pocket time of 2.3 seconds this year. That’s behind only Rodgers, Brady, and Murray who are all at 2.2. What more do you want??
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If I come to your house and you serving joints and trays like we having a tea party… I’m not leaving. We live here now.
Sold this before even posting it.. but look how cute💕
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@AudVisuals
@cardeaframez
Naw, I need my lawyer to keep it cordial only. Getting gangster is why I had to hire a lawyer to begin with.
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@ErvFrumJodeci
@dj_jroxx
That man challenged you in your own house...gotta show em no mercy.
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Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous if the first thing you do is introduce yourself??
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@JulIanA31463675
@Vitricate
@HeadcACE1906
Ngl, this only a debate bc of Kawhi’s injuries. Scottie is only definitively a better playmaker. Every other basketball category…I’ll take the Claw. At worst they wash.
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WHO GOT THE LIL DICK NOW, EBONY?
I was gonna say something wildly inappropriate 🤭🤭🤭
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Somebody told you your stroke was mid and you came to tell the internet???
“Your stroke is so mid”
Lol, if only many men will come out to talk about the weird foul smell, the poor sexual skills, how many times we begged ourselves to cum cos we’re irritated, and the lazy attitudes of most ladies during sexual intercourse.
But no, it’s not our ways.🍻
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These days we can’t take any for granted. Thankful for all 10,227. Cheers to my 28th summer!
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@Vitricate
@HeadcACE1906
Kawhi/Scottie wouldn’t be a bad comparison….nobody else should be pictured here.
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Y’all got ironing boards???? Responsible mfs
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Only decent pic I got from yesterday before the drinks won
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I scrolled too quick and thought this was Kandi and Todd 😭😭😭
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@vmitchellmusic
@mafanta_swaray
@ethereallangel
@theylove_KIMMIx
@Redeyejedi1er
@deveraaux
“Drunk, high, or whatever”
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It's boy math
How the hell are you “babysitting” your own child ?
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@jazzyjoyfit
@___inCANdescent
I meant from the actual application since you already provide a resume.
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🥴
I called myself making homemade cookies...yall gotta see these
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Barack Obama has dad and husband in his bio before PRESIDENT. So what should we do with this info???
Look at her bio. She has wife before Olympic champion. Do what you will with that information.
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@itsRACHIEduh
Exactly what I was thinking. If I move quick I might even be able to sign the birth certificate
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So, what does Chick-fil-A expect me to do on Sundays?
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How can you not love twitter? My TL is nothing but jokes, titties, jokes, controversy, more jokes, and more titties.
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Coochie always been $40
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Only dating women in relationships now. Single women need too much.
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R&B is crazy because it really have you jamming to all of your worse experiences
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@bigbodybae
@imabihh
3am....3pm...Central Standard time....Daylight savings time...Don’t matter.
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My favorite Tuesday night activity?
Making my son gourmet lunches for him to look at with absolute disgust when he opens it the next day.
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I wanna see more slappings in 2022. We finally getting somewhere.
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If you don’t have NYE plans, might I suggest getting drunk at home and making digital vision boards.
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My TL is making me so proud. I’m following the right people 🥹
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But can we take a moment to admire the craftsmanship
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I love a funny woman. If you can make me laugh I’m gone rock with you forever
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@gaggreflex
@___inCANdescent
Be a responsible adult and check the bag lol. Or are YOU too stoned 👀
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I didn't get the "tell your family I said Merry Christmas" text. It's really over 😭
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