Piss Tinkle aka Father Pissmas
@kurtkurtkurtkoe
Followers
698
Following
4,845
Media
1,733
Statuses
17,980
Overachieving pervert father of 3 or 4 idk
Cumming, GA
Joined January 2016
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Pinned Tweet
Lil update post for my homosexual followers and the 3 women that tolerate me
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imagine gettin in an argument with someone and they post a realistic video of you blowing a horse because you posted one picture of your full body one time
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@nuffsaidny
Who the hell is he hiring for security? Mortal Kombat characters in their off seasons?
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@EGIRLFRlEND
None of these women watched a single episode of My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic and it SHOWS
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@HUNTlNGHAWK
@Airorso
dude still…. my friend ran into a inflation fetishist once…. he’s still floating up in the clouds…
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@nooneevrrlydies
@2ksIut
that’s how they did it, pumpin out kids as young as they can, as fucked up as they can, as fast as they can
and nobody wanted to kick them out of their countries cause that’d mean touching one of em and..... yuck
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@dyingscribe
you remember when we used to pull people apart by tying em to two horses and running them in opposite directions? yeah…
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@elijah15664280
@OrdinaryGamers
Yeah but if you try playing that in bed you’re going to weld your thighs together and burn through your grandmam’s handknitted quilt
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@HHEAVYWASHH
Saved, bookmarked, and put the url in my notes app. Sent this to a matchmaker and told him to refer any clients that look like this to me. Emailed this to a plastic surgeon offering a bounty for any woman that came in looking like this. Creating an AI to scrub tinder for a girl l
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@JUSTcatmeme
“AHHHHH FUCK A TRAGIC EVENT—alright aaaand over to video and uuhhhh yeah that’s a good angle—AHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOO AAAAAAAA”
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@Slasher
“We didn’t kill MLK because he was preaching freedom, he actually had a way crazy overdue library book!” —CIA
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@MisterSam65
“Opinion discarded. In contact with local law enforcement providing video evidence of uncommitted crimes.”
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@AgentCucco
My mind is a machine that turns technological advancements into pornographic revolutions (not good)
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@Malcolm_fleX48
I’m not gonna say anything about her hairline
I’m not gonna say anything about her hairline
I’m not gonna say anything about her hairline
I’m not gonna.
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White women are so evil when they heard dogs were a man’s best friend they started fucking them too
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Satan created the added context feature and it’s your Holy Duty to ignore it and believe that Bruce Lee actually did that shit
Bruce Lee 2v1 against professional table tennis players with Nunchakus
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She doesn’t know I would conquer nations for her. I would soar to incredible heights for her. I would get attacked by tigers to give her something interesting to watch. I would sell my house to take her on vacation. I would donate organs for her rent. I would eat glass. I would.
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@b1g_damage
I want a third of the total runtime of my movie to be a no-details-missed sex scene with multiple well integrated kinks and fetishes, ending in a 100% pregnancy guaranteed creampie
especially if it’s a hallmark romcom family movie
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Girls can’t have breeding kinks
They were LITERALLY made to do that shit
That’s not a kink that is a FUNCTION
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@Dragonarianemes
@j_thomps2405
@shoe0nhead
Blackrock is a trillion dollar investing group that wants more money to kickstart a feudal dystopia
A normal citizen is a single person that makes probably less than 40k a year trying to own a little something for themselves
They. Ain’t. The. Same.
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@greentexts_bot
Good luck using that superior intellect to dodge a factory explosion that levels 5 blocks in every direction
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i’m really curious how many actual 25 year olds are 500,000 dollars in debt
how does that even happen
what did they do to use up that much money
i feel like an actual number would be very nice
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@Delibird444
“I’m sure you have buddy, I’m sure you have... Look over there... another funny misspelling”
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My post doing well…. horse blowjob jokes are the future
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i would rather you reply with a picture of me sleeping in my bed with a gun pointed at my head than this
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@jared7_13
@thinkpiecetribe
They’d defuse a bomb in seconds without even taking off the blue wolf head, i don’t think we need to worry
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i feel like dobermans should be attacking more toddlers they just look like they would enjoy it
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he tried to motorboat a flatchested girl
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@Matatatatatic
@AndromedaPip
feels like watching people talk about the current football season, and then when something new pops off and they move on it’s like when basketball starts up a new season. things get dropped like fads
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@dyingscribe
She didn’t just let the football team hit, she let the whole conference get a taste
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@hslotharrysbff
I’m seeing a lot of replies on here without one from you?? I don’t care if they don’t follow you they literally graced you with their interaction?? why aren’t you groveling at their feet?
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@punpunpunpun
I’m fucking done
IM SATURATED
DEPLETED
THIS IS MY CONCLUSION
THERE ARE PEOPLE ACTUALLY WANTING TO BUY CLOTHES THAT YOU CANT WEAR OR EVEN REALLY OWN
THE EMPEROR HAS NO E-CLOTHES
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If you’re treating the loss of the anime toddler the same as a loved one being lost I sincerely hope you never have anything actually hard happen to you
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Korra’s only memorable flaw was being Korra and she never overcame that shit
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Me at the Bojangles drive thru holding up the little family with the last box of chicken supremes
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The UK took the guns away so they could have fun killing their own citizens again, this time a little bit more creative than just muskets and typhoid
UK serial killer offered COVID-19 vaccine before millions of vulnerable, elderly
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@ColdCriti
The logical end of the “other guys are so evil and manipulative and would hate you, you should love me instead my queen” lifestyle
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@sugarsmorecake
people gifted attributes they didn’t have any need or want of is so funny
i know a guy at the gym who has a body that a lot of men would kill for who tells me he has no desire to bodybuild. None. Strength is what he’s there for, aesthetics were given to him randomly. Incredible
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@lara_hogan
“Ahhh yes brilliant! And when I speak of time I too include the exact angle of the sun in relativity to the subject!! It is a joyous occasion to wake up at the crack of 45° is it not?!”
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awww they deleted it :(
it was just a new vid of some ai tool that can apply a single picture to a 3d skeleton and then make some girls do tik tok dances
but come on that is NOT what people will use it for
It’ll be 100s of Marge Simpson twerking videos probably
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@ManTheMan_
Going straight into my bookmarks right above a thick asian ass
Everytime I open em it’ll be a sweet 1-2 of motivation
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@OhSayLesss
having enough restraint to say “i don’t wanna get mad” before doing much of anything is respectable by itself... but waiting that long? He got more restraint than a BDSM couple
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@ieatassforhours
H-holy.... Holy shit.... That’s... That’s a fucking end-of-the-psychopath-movie-scene where it’s assumed the guy snaps and kills them both to make a sleeping bag out of their skin... But you just kept on going??
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@dyingscribe
unpopular opinion: sitting is less harmful than standing. we should either be sitting or walking, standing without reason has done more bad to me than either of the other things
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@SampsonMichae10
Wasn’t too long ago that every third image of a busty anime girl had spiders for hands sooo
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@ZeroT_H
Scott Cawthon is proving himself to be an actual man
Who cares what any one of us thinks about his beliefs, he’s standing by em which is 900% more respectable than floundering cause some e-losers are being e-losers
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@yourenottheguy
Kim Kardashian has spent uncountable hours and MILLIONS to look a fraction as good as this girl i saw in the fruit section at the grocery store 2 months ago
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@undeadscribe
You’ve heard of The Lasso of Truth? Now introducing: The Spoon of Too Damn Much
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@Jra4U
@GregAbbott_TX
Sorry you’re right, next time I’m fighting a war I’ll make sure to make a formal appointment for the fighting, very rude not to
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@HHEAVYWASHH
ike this. Paying wedding dress tailors to send me the names of any woman with these measurements. Buying the women in my life more treats and snacks. Harassing women in the gym so they will stop losing weight. Praying to every figure i can find on the wikipedia page for “God” to
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@SakakiIsCute
“They regenerate so fast our cannons can’t damage them”
I guarantee titans do not regenerate at ~3,000 rounds per minute
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Whenever I see a painfully white person with “BLM | ACAB | Ally” in their bio I just know they were the type that used to say “If I had slaves I would have treated them really nice!!”
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taking steroids and sacrificing half of your lifespan so you can be the biggest guy at the beach is actually the most noble and intelligent thing you can ever do
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@undeadscribe
Poe. HOW THE FUCK DO YOU FIND THIS SHIT?? I SEARCH DAY AND NIGHT FOR THE WORST SHIT I CAN FIND BUT YOURE ALWAYS ONE STEP AHEAD
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Urban decay might be real but you can still at least play jump rope with the homeless so it’s not half bad
I'm still not sure what they expected us to do outside
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@SuperStar846
This is why you must learn to talk over other people and assert whatever you’re saying as worth hearing
I don’t care if you’re talkin about picking out your earwax or filing your taxes, shout down that guy who’s talkin about philosophy or a loss in the family and take over!!
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I was at Astroworld and I can’t believe Travis Scott jumped into the pit and started doing Mortal Kombat finishers on the most defenseless people he could find?? Terrible and unprofessional conduct imho
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@LivingScribe
It’s so funny how they think they have a leg to stand on when in reality half the reason they think men need to be raised better is cause the ones that ARE RAISED WELL avoid them to the extent they don’t think they exist.
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A man’s worth is based entirely upon how useful he is to other people
A woman’s worth is based on if someone calling her “mid” would get ratio’d or not
Still don’t think there’s a double standard?
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My post doing well…. horse blowjob jokes are the future
imagine gettin in an argument with someone and they post a realistic video of you blowing a horse because you posted one picture of your full body one time
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@yoloswagstudios
@PandasAndVidya
dogs are so luck cause they get to go up to random women and intensely sniff deep into their coochie and asshole AND they get pet for it
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turns out the “what zero pussy does to a mf” is a legal defense
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CHARACTER WITH DICK POWERS: CUMming through hah!
CHARACTER WITH PUSSY POWER: i don’t want any LIP from you!
CHARACTER WITH AN ENLARGED PROSTATE: sorry guys i need to hit the bathroom i’ll be right back
CHARACTER WITH ICE POWERS: *chill* out
CHARACTER WITH FIRE POWERS: let's *heat* things up
CHARACTER WITH RIFLE: it's very *GUN* to see you
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The whole “just be unapologetically you” mindset only works if you’re a much better person than the majority of people
Spoiler tho: ya probably ain’t
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@HHEAVYWASHH
send me a girl like her. Checking my police departments mugshots for a girl like her. Volunteering at the homeless shelter to see if a girl like her comes in. Looking out for shooting stars to wish for her. Making vision boards for her. Doing everything in my power for her.
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What the hell is so super about a bunch of sewer dwelling, mutated, teenage turtles gangbanging a redhead every night?
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@ScurrBurger
Compete?? This lil thang will do all the work for me and all I gotta do is hold it like the gas pump handle? It’s gonna be a competition between me and myself to stay awake
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Personally I would not tell the world that nobody wants me like this, but sure go for it
Why is giving women money such this big THING now? That use to be the way niggas courted… by GIVING. They’d do any small gesture to show you they want you.
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Gun guys at their 4 year old daughter’s funeral after she got hit by a truck crossing the street: “I mean I miss her but her situational awareness was trash tbh”
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incestual super soldier beat the brakes off a kid and it took 4 teachers to restrain him
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Deaf people probably think it’s really funny when they see somebody say “listen here” in sign language
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@dyingscribe
if you cover up the usernames you really cannot tell they’re not 50 year old white men
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@P1SS0FFX
i’d think we get sympathy from someone living in a country that’s 1/10th the size of Texas? and what type of people are demanding you need to know where states are?? they should know that’s too much to ask from a Scot
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@jazzanchovy
You weren’t bringing enough spartan violence and hatred to the meeting and that’s on you for not fitting in
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@dyingscribe
In 60 years our kids are going to be reading about how the trans version of Kristallnacht was kicked off by a vtuber changing jobs
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@protozeloz
we already saw millions lost when people were using twitter blue to impersonate companies (funny) so who knows what the limit is (possibly even funnier)
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