This is my pinned tweet thread. I will never give that man my credit card number - I don’t trust him. So if we lose the ability to tweet if we don’t pay, I’m karlaliliana on Bluesky and Mastadon. I’m karlitaliliana on IG.
I deeply appreciate the good-faith interaction with this thread and it's helped me learn a lot as people have asked questions. I have put the thread content and some additional thoughts interaction gave me here to make it easier to share off of Twitter:
I cannot imagine what it would have been like for me to have made plans to fly, believing as an immunocompromised person I was safe - then discovering that I wasn’t - mid-air. With no ability to change my plans. What a nightmare.
“Ladies and gentlemen, this is your pilot speaking. This is the most important announcement I’ve ever made. The federal mask mandate is over. Take off your mask if you choose!”
A wonderful moment mid flight on
@alaskaair
today!
Netflix hired a powerhouse team of creators from a variety of marginalized communities and they were performing exceptionally well. Had us all invested in their work. They were then the first people they showed the door at the first financial difficulty.
Taking this
@AOC
quote into my week: "My choice isn't what I breathe in, it's what I exhale... And right now, in this moment, I feel a need for all of us to breathe fire." Breathe fire, friends.
This is a reminder that there are 20,469 high schools in the US, between 3.5 and 4k students get a perfect ACT, and there are 1,942 seats in Harvards freshmen class. You could fill every slot with a valedictorian and perfect ACT and still have many in the same spot not make it.
I was hospitalized last week for a very accelerated heart rate, very low BP, and cycling oxygen levels. And my entire experience at Alameda hospital was of one of being punished for being “insubordinate”.
Just a reminder that Simone Biles faced unconscionable abuse at the hands of a doctor that US Gymnastics did NOTHING about until all those young women organized together to protect themselves. She owes the US and US Gymnastics in particular, nothing. Not one thing.
For the 4th of July, I’m gonna tweet out the 20 lessons from the 20th Century from Timothy Snyders “On Tyranny”. Each of these is the beginning of a short readable chapter I recommend you read. Number one, Do not obey in advance.
Jennifer Lopez spoke out about her upcoming Super Bowl show w/ Shakira, after stars like Rihanna refused to perform in solidarity w/ Colin Kaepernick.
JLO told
@Variety
it's important for Latin women representation & to show "we bring something to this country that's necessary."
I am so deeply disappointed in the Democratic party. My heart really feels so bruised. Marginalized people are constantly the acceptable tradeoff for what folks perceive as “safety”. I am immunocompromised and I have a right to protest and life.
I once had a tech CEO tell me “I’m terrified you are telling me there could be racist groups organizing across my company” and I said “Start a very public diversity initiative and you will not wonder, you will know, they will make themselves heard.
Google employees first used the tactic of leaking their coworkers' personal information to far-right accounts/blogs in order to shut down advocacy work on diversity after the James Damore memo
My story on that from 2018
I cannot tell you how much it burns me how vilified immigrants are in our public discourse and how deeply essential immigrants are to the creation of all infrastructure creation, maintenance, and emergency response. It is heartbreaking. The dehumanization is wild.
Jesus Campos, a construction worker who knows the crew, said the men were from Guatemala, Honduras, El Salvador and Mexico. They are in their 30s and 40s and have spouses and children.
“They are hard-working, humble men,” he said.
More updates to come for
@BaltimoreBanner
.
And I keep repeating this - protest is not a tactic to gain support. In particular, this kind of protest is to disrupt the comfort of everyday people and become such an agitation to people with actual decision making rights that they change course.
I said this yesterday but people who do this are seriously misunderstanding human psychology. Nobody trapped in the Holland Tunnel on their morning commute is gonna come out of it thinking "Wow this sucks, they've converted me."
I’m writing this because all the coverage of Latinx and Black death as a result of Covid is being covered like it’s JUST the pre-existing conditions of racism that make us susceptible. That is certainly part of it, but the other part is the lack of value people see in our lives.
I wish folks could connect the corporate greed that lead to Southwest airlines having a holiday implosion and climate change that drove the weather to be catastrophic across so many states. It’s all connected. If we allow it to continue, those catastrophes will only get bigger.
It has actually broken my heart in a way I didn’t anticipate watching ocean life tell us this week how deeply we have screwed them over. Acres of fish on shorelines, fish we never see making themselves seen, coral bleaching - it is a crisis down there created by up here.
Nearly 100 whales stranded themselves at the same time on an Australian beach
A wildlife scientist said it seemed that "something else is going on that we just don’t know"
No one should be so rich they can at-will change large communication structures. This is not about M*sk, delinquent as he is, this is about how we’ve allowed wealth to amass more power than the shared project of governance. We are living in plutocratic feudalism.
Bias makes a doctor believe we should be grateful for any scrap of care we get and when that is questioned and we are considered ungrateful, our care gets compromised.
@rationalhumanis
You have absolutely zero data to substantiate this while simultaneously deriding a top tier qualified candidate for being excellent and Black and not ashamed for it. That’s a lot of internal self-rationalization.
That lack of value puts us in a position where a doctor who has incredible power in that moment of personal vulnerability can prioritize what they see as your insubordination as a more important matter than your health.
Hey friends, a friend of mine was just diagnosed with
#LongCovid
and it is a big reminder to me how little information folks have to identify what is happening to them, so I’m just gonna share a few clues and what they mean.
I can’t tell you how deeply I believe this moment in time is what it is because we are trying to build multiracial, multiethnic, multi-religious, multicultural society w/ the same systems, skills, and norms of homogeneous society. Here are some skills I think we need get good at:
Here is the thing y’all, because of the particular way I was treated, I know that if I was a thin, white, woman I would have not been treated that way.
In the first 30 minutes at UCSF I had more exams then in 5 hours at Alameda hospital. When the nurse comes in there she says she heard about what happened to me (again, thank God for my people)
And I know that not all of us have the privilege of a bunch of Black and Brown activist, lawyers, doctors, community workers to be mobilized BEFORE our lives are snuffed out.
When I think of the shows that really showed out this year, its Gentefied, Heartstopper, Bridgerton, Squid Game, Raising Dion - all content showcasing communities that don’t get seen or heard. Some of them overcoming Netflix’s own lack of algorithmic amplification.
I almost died twice, after having gotten this disease before ANY restrictions. It would have made me panic. I just really feel for the people on that plane who had no idea that was coming.
A hill I will die on is the architecture of the internet led people to believe that a lack of friction, is the goal of life. But you can’t be in community w/o friction. It actually takes out all the places where trust and camaraderie are built.
Community is not just cookouts and the fun stuff, and those things are missing because many folks don’t want to show up for the “non-fun” part of what being in community means.
I was talked down to as if I couldn’t understand what was happening. I had to assert several times that I was a weightlifter, a CEO, a Tía, a human. And I hated it. I would never use those things as a way to demonstrate I had value
I found out recently that Long Covid took my ability to have babies. There is more there and not a lot I wanna talk about yet. I mourn not just for myself, I find myself mourning for all the women who will be robbed of that choice because their jobs/lives put them in harm’s way.
Covid has been the most remarkable prism for inequality: a two-tiered system of care and safety
And as a perfect specimen for the larger problem: the lower tier mostly has no idea the extent to which they’ve been screwed over
“I need you to understand that I understand I may incur medical debt here. That I may have a heart attack. But I have lost all faith in the possibility you or this hospital would save my life. And so I’m willing to take that risk. Now please close the door, I need to get dressed”
Struck by how much
#Parkland
is using their moment to give Brown and Black kids largely forgotten in this debate, time to tell their stories while the cameras are actually running. To understand your power and distribute it to make more is exactly how it should be.
It was watching the systems that are built to discard us at best and exterminate us at worst do that. And watching your community go “No the eff you don’t”
What’s wild is how much room there is to grow their presence in our communities. So much money left on the table every year because folks with decision making power don’t get our spending power.
You have to understand that I was woozy. I was having a very hard time communicating. But I wasn’t allowed to have help. When he came back in the room he kept wanting to talk about my friends tone or my tone. I told him I needed him to be focused on my healthcare.
I had been reading about Covid patients having clots and strokes and wanted a CT and ultrasound on my leg (I had been having shooting pains), at first they told me it was a cyst behind my leg and I said “how can you possibly know that, NO ONE has even examined my leg”
Three medical professionals confirm that my case is being mismanaged. So my people start trying to transfer me. I communicate this to the doctor that I want to be discharged and suddenly he is concerned with letting me go.
I say I want a patient advocate, I’m given hospital admins number and told I can call in the morning. In the mean time, my whole damn community is calling medical people they know to ensure what is happening is not right.
I’ve muted this because people are really unnecessarily cruel and I don’t need to be seeing that. You don’t have to believe in a mask mandate to believe that I have a right to make choices about what risks I opt into. It is impossible to make those choices when mid-air.
The physician came in ready to discharge me before there was an exam. When Mimi and Jacinta asked questions and pushed back the doctor went ballistic. He refused to give me healthcare if they were on the phone. I could get healthcare only if my advocates weren’t on the phone.
He is then outside saying he wants the numbers of my people. I tell him, again, he is not my priority right now. I wait til he leaves and I don’t so much as sign a discharge paper. I go to the parking lot where
@PerspectivePlus
is waiting to take me to UCSF.
I’m am forever grateful, changed, and deeply moved by what everyone did to save me. And I truly believe they saved me. And we need reforms or data or accountability to be in place in order for our people to not be killed by medical systems.
There are a wave of stories about a “rise in crime” and no one is connecting any of it to a pandemic that decimated communities, had people 9 months behind on rent, and a government that that it was “too much” to send people $2000 back pay to cover the damage.
A year after the murder of George Floyd, Los Angeles and other American cities are facing a surge in violent crime, forcing cities whose leaders embraced the idea of police reform to reassess how far they are willing to go to reimagine public safety.
Folks are asking about my current condition so I’ll add here. I’m gratefully without fever for the first time in 9 weeks. Which is such a relief. I still have persistent tachycardia that I’m seeing a cardiologist and Infectious disease specialist about.
He tells me that my heart rate is too high for that. He also warns me that I’ll be incurring lots of medical debt because insurance doesn’t like paying for more than one hospital stay. Meanwhile, every time I push back, it’s a large reaction, like I’m questioning his authority.
Early in the process I had heard all the micro-aggressions, when I was struggling to put my words together asking if I spoke Spanish derisively. I was asked multiple times if it was diabetes. I told them to check my blood sugar that I had never been even pre-diabetic.
There is something overwhelmingly terrible that Judge Brown Jackson has worked this hard, done this much, and she now has to sit for 13 hours of racism a day to get onto the supreme court. Like some disgusting final racism gauntlet.
It gets to the point that whenever he comes in the room, my heart rate goes 120ish to 130’s. I’m trying to calm myself down. I am telling myself, I cannot let this man kill me. Meanwhile, I’m so dang weak. I have such a hard time. I have lost all faith the doctor would save me.
I’m so tired y’all and still actually afraid this wild doctor is going to chase me out to the parking lot. When I get to Trina’s back seat I can barely keep my eyes open. I just felt relief.
and ultimately still understood that was the only way to connote that I had value in this very messed up system. My oxygen levels were cycling from the 70’s to 90’s and the doctor told me the 70’s didn’t count. That I would be out of breath if they were true.
My heart rate was staying between 115 to 134 for hours. The attending was doing nothing about it. Mimi calls
@nmsanchez
@hutchamachutch
@laurawp
trying to figure out what to do for me. Laura gets a friend who is a doctor to call the hospital and get looped into my care.
I’ve had such a hard time writing this down. I’m only doing it because it may help someone. But it’s hard to write down. I was in a very vulnerable position and had both my colleague/friend Mimi and her cardiac nurse cousin Jacinta on FaceTime.
When I was in second grade, I had a small growth on my left temple and the dermatologist grew so agitated at my mom asking questions in broken English after a month of no results he grabbed my wrist, pulled me down onto the exam table, and dug nitric acid into my temple.
Black docs account for 3.6% of all dermatologists, and Latinx/Hispanic docs just 4.6%.
Yet this member-led resolution has been submitted to
@aadskin
(American Acadmey of Dermatology) seeking to dismantle *all* of the academy’s DEI initiatives:
I got talked to about my tone again. I ask for a CT and he says “That’s a lot of radiation next to your breast tissue, do you want breast cancer? I’ll only agree to this if you say you’re fine with getting breast cancer”
The attending comes into yell at me telling me how inappropriate that is. How he wants the doctors number to call her and tell her how unprofessional she is. I say I want a different doctor, he tells me there are no other doctors.
I get the impression folks who favor Israel are seeing a huge amount of anti-Jewish sentiment and folks who are publicly pro-Palestine are seeing tremendous anti-Arab sentiment. It's good to remember the algorithm is constantly being manipulated to stimulate you anger response.
Finally Mimi gets on the phone and tells me “Karla, I know you’re tired. I know you want to go to sleep. I know you don’t want to push back right now but we need to save your life. Just give me 15 minutes to get yourself out of there and we will do everything else.”
So I’m sitting there tachycardic with my oxygen levels cycling, and I say okay. I tell them to discharge me. He tells me about all the debt and how I could have a heart attack on the bay bridge. I’m in a gown, unplugged trying to go get my clothes to get dressed.
If 4,000 Black employees suing your company because of terrible racial abuse doesn’t prevent you from amassing more power, what the hell are we doing here? This move is concerning about
@paraga
’s leadership.
I’m just gonna repeat this every time the commodification of weed comes up in the absence of the release of humans whose lives were wrecked by our laws and continue to be wrecked by our laws.
I’m so grateful for Justice Sotomayor. What it must take to be the ONE JUSTICE willing to call the act of rescinding motivated by racism. She was like, nah colorblind killers, this is racism and I’m gonna write it out.
He comes in several times demanding the numbers of the medical professionals that advocated for me. I tell him he can’t be my priority. He won’t leave the door. So finally I look him dead in the face and tell him...
It’s hard to know whether this is my body recovering from Covid or having a long term problem as a result of Covid so lots of tests on the way to get there.
Given the amount of attacks I’m seeing online, I’d like to help folks who are just getting more audience prep for attack. When I first started to get more of an audience that came with white supremacists attacks, I looked everywhere and had a hard time finding best practices.
So I spent the week trying to keep down food. Doc said “You caught a bug. I know it’s unsatisfying to hear but a tummyache for someone else is going to be five days of not eating for you. This is what being immunocompromised means. The severity of this is also Long Covid.”
I don’t wanna hear anyone complaining about BLM protestors on bridges or freeways. There is an incredible distinction between an action that makes people unable to ignore pain and a group trying to disrupt the right to vote.
It won’t ever not be heartbreaking to me that our pain is so ignorable and acceptable that we have to broadcast our wounds in specific detail for them to be taken seriously. Just really feeling for
@AOC
and the emotional labor she just did to help us not “move past” this.
@Katrina_HRM
@jentrification
America Ferrera once said American tv for Latinx folks is like walking through a home you know is yours but none of your pictures are up in it. And I felt that. Deep.
I’m sitting here thinking of all the adult survivors in NY being forced to make the toughest decision of their lives before Friday because the act that protected their right to accountability is set to expire. They are forced to treat accountability like a fire sale.
NEW — NYC mayor Eric Adams accused of sexual assault in Adult Survivors Act claim filed Wednesday.
“Plaintiff was sexually assaulted by Defendant Eric Adams in New York, New York in 1993,” the summons filed Wednesday night states —>
Thank you to everyone being incredibly kind. Trolls have found this thread but they do not outweigh the thousands of people who are reaching out with their own stories and well wishes. I take really serious my responsibility to do something here.
#2
Defend Institutions, feels so important in this moment as we watch them fall. It is important to hold the Supreme Court accountable for its destruction.
@lisaborel
Thank you, I’m weighing lots of options but waiting til all my heart stuff clears up to move whatever I choose to move forward. This information is helpful. ❤️
Representation is not everything but a lack of representation and cultural awareness can create severely dangerous situations for patients. When a specialty is segregated it creates really different outcomes and much less accountability. Power insulates.
It is absolutely WILD to me that Karen Bass spent $9.7M in this race to Caruso’s $100M and they are in a dead heat. You know how mediocre you have to be to be struggling while dropping that much cash into this race?
You are telling me ONE white woman prevented 2 prominent Latinx politicians (
@JulianCastro
and
@aoc
) from participating in the DNC, didn’t understand their importance to both Latinx and progressive communities, then is heralded for it.
What I want fixed are the many systems that I interacted with during this process that enabled a bad actor to live comfortably without fear of repercussion for treating a patient this way.
That was the first of many experiences of health care failing me because of my ethnicity and gender. Then folks ask why people don’t get vaccinated or go to the doctor before an emergency. The walls of medicine have never been safe for people of color.
Community, there is so much trauma in the “what do you want, for us to get back into lockdown?! Cause that isn’t happening.” That’s all reactive fear. No one has said that. I do wanna address what I do want:
-mandatory masking in hospitals, grocery stores, and airplanes
#6
Be wary of paramilitaries, the Proud Boys, the minute men, all of the armed groups that have popped up deserve ire but also accountability. Their relationship with cops should be investigated.
I know I keep saying this but I truly cannot imagine how tired organizers were on November 5th and they got back up and went to work. Legions of tired people. Because this was that important.
When these things start to pop up, you want them to at least do blood tests for inflammation and autoimmune issues. You want at minimum to start tracking CRP, Sed Rate, ESR, IgG, IgA, ana-titter rates to all get tested and tracked over time.
- Identifying how power is moving and what risk we place disproportionately on the most vulnerable in order to “function” in ways that make us comfortable but not strategic
If after having Covid, no matter the severity, you start feeling the following kinds of symptoms: unusually tired and just can’t get yourself to feel replenished, when you are feeling rundown you start to have some light cold symptoms, if you have random unexplainable pains…
@kashanacauley
As a person that has to post “this isn’t Mexican Independence Day” every year and avoids all bars and events on that day, that’s a reasonable fear.
Update: my assembly members team reached out and put me in contact with the patient safety team for Alameda Health Systems. They are helping me file a grievance. One of the things I was really clear about was that my concern isn’t just that there was one bad actor.