I've made it! Marge and Lisa say my name, are fans, and imply that I'm a lesbian who wore plaid onstage. I never ever wore plaid onstage! This Sunday!
@TheSimpsons
#TheSimpsons
Years ago, Scott Baio was standing in front of me telling his friend that some woman was “a stupid cunt”. He turned around, apologized, and said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know a lady was present”. That’s my Scott Baio story.
#ScottBaio
Two years ago, I had brain surgery for my essential tremor. It was getting harder to play guitar and everyone thought I was either really nervous or smoking meth before my shows. I had to be awake during the procedure. They wanted to test my hands while playing guitar.
I’ll never forget being on his radio show “Loveline” in 96. He told his audience, not to get upset, that my Kissed a Girl song was just cute and not at all about lesbians. I tried to tell him that the writer of the song (me) thought differently. He was a dick.
I sang Supermodel. You know my biggest fear was not the pain I might feel or the freakishness of having my skull open, but my performance for the docs and nurses! It was not my best. So out of tune. However, the surgery was a success!!
@AbigailShrier
Abigail, I’m sorry you think the gays have overstayed their welcome. I just know that I wish there would have been Pride when I was a sad closeted teen. I’ll never forget the wonder and sense that I was not alone attending my first one. It still applies today
Years ago, Scott Baio was standing in front of me telling his friend that some woman was “a stupid cunt”. He turned around, apologized, and said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know a lady was present”. That’s my Scott Baio story.
#ScottBaio
I knew on the surface it had to be somewhat light & funny - so I could get away with it. But underneath, was...the insidious “gay agenda”. I wanted to write a song that I wished I heard when I was young -terrified, lonely and queer.
In 1992, I recorded a record with Wendy&Lisa. It was never released, thought it was lost in the Universal fire. I don’t even have a copy- haven’t heard the songs since then - until recently. Wendy found a copy.
@wendyandlisa
#prince
@MattBinder
@oneunderscore__
Years ago, Scott Baio was standing in front of me telling his friend that some woman was “a stupid cunt”. He turned around, apologized, and said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know a lady was present.” That’s my Scott Baio story.
#ScottBaio
I was in no mood for it. But tonight, I was hired to play a mini-concert on Zoom for someone’s birthday. It was a surprise. She was so excited & everyone was in such a great mood. I played her favorites. It so lifted me. And I realized, I like my fans. They are weirdos like me.
A few years ago, I walked by my childhood home. I decided to knock on the door. The current owner knew who I was, and let me in. Tonight, I’m doing a house concert there.Jr. High pals - who I haven’t seen since then- are coming! I was upset they took out the avocado shag carpet.
I taught at Richard Thompson’s guitar camp this week. So much fun! Richard is swell and not a bad guitar player. No, that not a MAGA hat, it’s a Writers Guild strike one
Years ago, Scott Baio was standing in front of me telling his friend that some woman was “a stupid cunt”. He turned around, apologized, and said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know a lady was present”. That’s my Scott Baio story.
#ScottBaio
#chachi
I got this text by mistake last week. I responded. She hasn’t gotten back to me. I want to know more about Luke and the secretary. Btw, who uses the word “secretary” anymore?
Ben Shapiro: "The great suspicion is that in Frozen 4, they'll make Elsa a lesbian ... If they do that, it is the end of Disney as a company. Predict it. You can write it down. It is April 17th. If they do that in Frozen 4, it will destroy Disney."
I always felt I looked ugly, fat, or not appealing enough as an adolescent. But I found my senior year high school picture, and I was damn cute! I wish I knew. Did anyone feel this way too? I wore that vest a lot, btw.
#EnglishRockorLesbianVest
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@Jillsobule
, a great and witty singer-songwriter, has a new song that takes on the Texas anti-abortion law: “You Better Not F*ck in Texas.” Check it out in the latest issue of my new newsletter
#ThisLand
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Jill Sobule sang at my Funny Girl Party yesterday, and she was incredible! She’s setting up a Patreon, but in the meantime go to and follow her at
@JillSobule
on Twitter and Instagram, and search for her on Facebook!
@richardmarx
I love that these folks have no concept that they’re singing and dancing to a song originally celebrating gay sex in the 70s at the Chelsea Y.
So many folks here have responded that they have the same condition- essential tremor. No one talks about it much, as it’s not as deadly as other movement disorders. You can’t die from it, but it can make like very difficult. BTW, last month, I did 6 shows a week. It worked!
To all those folks responding “no one cares”. Obviously you do care or you wouldn’t take the time to tweet it. And it is a big deal. It’s a big fucking deal. I think about my pal who was so talented, the best QB in school, but quit scared he would be found out. Bravo Carl Nassib
Raiders DL Carl Nassib became the first active NFL player to announce he is gay. “What’s up people,” Nassib posted on IG. “I just wanted to take a quick moment to say that I’m gay. I’ve been meaning to do this for a while now but finally feel comfortable getting it off my chest.”
It’s my birthday! Here I am with a Denver Bronco birthday cake explaining to my cousin Steve from London how American Football is played. ‘So here is the right guard who is protecting the quarterback, and.....”
@RonFilipkowski
I was once on Adam’s radio show with the equally lovely Dr. Drew. They were reassuring the callers that my “I Kissed a Girl” song wasn’t really about lesbians, but just “innocent fun”. They were not interested in what the writer of the song - me- thought.
#Theworst
I was diagnosed later in life -I wish I had known so much earlier. It could have saved me years of pain wondering what was wrong with me. It’s under-diagnosed with girls as many of us were not hyperactive so we didn’t cause problems for anyone.
@yashar
This was so useful to read. I wasted years of therapy trying to analyze my inability back in high school to work, even on subjects I enjoyed. (Something something father?) Feel like a failure every single day, even after being diagnosed. This helps, thanks
@yashar
I did two tours with Warren Zevon. I think here we are singing a cover of “Jackson”. It’s his Birthday today. I miss him a lot. He was a mentor and a good pal to me.
My bad lesbian romance novel idea: She’s embarrassed but texts me back.We start a back and forth, which turns into flirting. We meet, fall in love, she divorces Luke - who is, btw, a billionaire. He keeps the kid. She keeps the NY & beach house. I learn to ride horses. The End.
I have never had the desire to get a tattoo. I’m so glad I passed on getting a Chinese character or tribal tattoo in the 90s. But last week, my nephews, once more, peer pressured me. I gave it a lot of thought. What would really mean something to me? Harriet the Spy, of course.
two youngish clipboard girls approached me on the street asking if I supported gay rights. I said I did, and in fact had one of the first gay pop songs years ago called "I Kissed a Girl". They looked at each other like I was mental.
When I did the video for “I Kissed a Girl” - the ye olde 1995 version, they wouldn’t even let me kiss the girl-instead I had to have Fabio’s baby. I think this sure is swell.
People are asking me why I endorsed the use of "We're Not Gonna Take It" for the Ukrainian people and did not for the anti-maskers. Well, one use is for a righteous battle against oppression; the other is a infantile feet stomping against an inconvenience.
“The worst thing you can do is censor yourself as the pencil hits the paper. You must not edit until you get it all on paper. If you can put everything down, stream-of-consciousness, you'll do yourself a service.”
Stephen Sondheim
It’s national coming out day. For the 39th year in a row, I’d like to announce to all my friends, fans and family that I might just be a huge homo
#ComingOutDay
All of a sudden, I’ve developed a little social anxiety as we are slowly climbing out of the pandemic. I feel it mostly in my body. I haven’t felt like this since Shelly Zissman stole my diary in high school . Is this a common thing happening for others now?
I was so excited that the video was to end with me kissing (and a real long kiss) the other woman. It was going to be a first on MTV. Plus I had a crush on her. In the end, the label chickened out. They had me pregnant with Fabio’s baby
Would you still go out with someone who has a worn copy of Atlas Shrugged on their bedside table, and an Elon Musk audiobook in their Tesla? Asking for a friend. Really.
Years ago, I was on a panel about the future of music. The guy from Spotify was next to me saying the new platform will be a lucrative & a blessing for artists. I responded that I thought, say, payola and coke under the table seemed more transparent & beneficial
If record labels + fans found out in the 90s that Tower Records was ripping off artists, using music profits to bankroll and elevate Rush Limbaugh, the shelves would have been empty.
I hope more powerful artists follow
@Neilyoung
’s stance on toxic jock J0e R0.gan
#LeaveSpotify
Something amazing happened to me at my show Sunday at Joe’s Pub . A man came up to me after and handed me a “Secret Jewish Space Laser Corps” medal. After all these years, I’m finally a member! I probably shouldn’t be telling you.
I talked to an old friend who I hadn’t corresponded with in ages. When someone uses the phrase “do your own research”, it’s time to not talk to them for another 20 years.
2 yrs ago, I walked by my childhood home and knocked on the door. Well, I just played two packed house concerts there. Most had gone to my same horrible Jr. High. Everyone said it was the worst time of there lives I wish I would have known that back then. I wasn't the only one.
I’m at a cabin in North Carolina trying to write. No Internet or cell access- you have to drive into town. I hope there are no evil murderers from the 70s here!
In the video, I tried to capture the vibe of the lesbian pulp fiction from the 50s/60s —where two unhappy Connecticut housewives fall in love and move to the evil Greenwich Village
Last month, I had DBS brain surgery. They implanted two electrodes and a battery. Today, I get all charged up for the first time! I’m gonna ask the doc if he can program it so I can shoot lasers out of my eyes. Some Carrie shit
Say, I had brain surgery for my shaky hands-an essential tremor. I was having a hard time playing guitar. Now, I…shred. The people that made my device wrote an article about it.