Haley Nahman
@halemur
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Writer and editor. Subscribe to my newsletter/podcast, Maybe Baby @
New York, NY
Joined August 2011
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Pinned Tweet
You may think I complain a lot but the pro/con list my ex made about me in 2008 said I complain a lot AND I'm fun.
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Years ago someone told me they were invited to a women's lunch in New York hosted by Jill Biden and ahead of the event they were all told in an email that Jill Biden requested no awkward silences
Jill Biden is on the July cover of Vogue. Just dropped this AM.
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I wrote about the limits of Emily Ratajkowski's political framework and how it relates to the debate happening in literary criticism about whether comprehension=resistance. (cc
@laurenoyler
,
@xwaldie
, Amber Husain)
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Someone asked me how I deal with writer’s block so I made them a chart
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Do you ever think about how Sarah Jessica Parker’s name is Sarah
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Already dreading the post-covid personal essays about how, weirdly, people kind of miss quarantine
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Just got emotional thinking about the nerds who made the vaccine 😭 love u
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I know awards are stupid and irrelevant but finding out Lily Collins got nominated over Michaela Coel is one of the fastest transitions into a bad mood I've experienced in a while
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I think it's only fair that we all turn the same age this year that we turned last year. It would work if we all agreed don't be a scab!
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My profile of Claire Saffitz and the beloved
@bonappetit
YouTube channel is up on
@ManRepeller
today. Didn't put this in the piece but I watched her make a quince tart and then ate it shamefully on the train.
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I've resigned from Man Repeller to go freelance. Feels more than a little like a breakup, but I can't wait to, as they say, ""spread my wings."" Thank you for reading! "The End of an Era, the Beginning of Another, Ad Infinitum" via
@manrepeller
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Why do people pronounce carribean differently depending on whether they’re talking about the place or the Johnny Depp movie
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There's a lot to be anxious about, so I understand if media is not your first concern. But if you're as saddened as I am about the folding of The Outline, or are confused about why media is fucked rn, thought I'd share some thoughts on both. If for no other reason than catharsis.
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I wrote about why quarantine feels so much like depression for
@TheCut
(and why that comparison might be useful)
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Thanks so much for all the support for my latest newsletter. And also for the critiques! I found some of them really thought-provoking and useful.
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Today I'm launching my newsletter, Maybe Baby. If people call you an over-thinker, your therapist thinks you're funny but gently fucked up, or you're just kind of lonely, I hope you'll consider smashing that subscribe button.
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Me @ 6:15pm: okay now I guess I’ll hop in the shower and get the day started :)
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So funny that when my mind is too scattered to focus on something I go on twitter. “It’s hot today, gonna go cool down in a fire”
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Back in my day all we cared about was competitive cheerleading (Netflix's "Cheer," January 2020)
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Practical king
Wait, is Bernie is wearing the same jacket from his meme at the inauguration?
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Quarantine log, day 6: My boyfriend and I are working on a new role-play where we pretend he lives in a different apartment
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Anti-social behavior like this is not mature, polite, or cool. It actually makes everyone lonely and neurotic
As an adult, don’t ask your friends to pick you up from the airport.
Use uber, save a friendship.
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If you change out of your pajamas before 5pm it counts as getting dressed
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My newsletter this week is about the insanity of falling in love and the complexity of loving someone long-term, featuring a love letter I wrote in 2017 about losing my damn mind.
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Crazy that you’re literally not allowed to look good in quarantine. You have to look gross at all times! I’m sorry :(
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Maybe Baby
#37
is about how our conception of “community” has been skewed by capitalism, why that feels bad, and why I’m turning off comments. Featuring recs by
@shamblanderson
, David Runciman,
@haleymlotek
,
@jaycaspiankang
,
@Vinncent
, and
@rachsyme
.
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My newsletter this week explores the limits of social media activism, the complicity of performance, and a bunch of resources for self-education.
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60 days from now, New York yuppies emerge from their homes, bodies softened by a Quarantine 15, faces peeling from trying all their retinols, garbage bags of things that don’t bring them joy clutched in their feral claws....
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Petition to change the “haha” iMessage reaction to “lol” so we seem less dead inside
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Celebrities are easy targets for moral policing—and not necessarily the most egregious capitalists—but it’s distinctly American that we rarely target them for greed. This week I wrote about public figures who sell their fans’ attention to brands.
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Blessed tweet
any sanity i’ve retained this year is because of them
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My weird flex is that I have a piece of Claire Saffitz’s Tupperware
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Fun fact about bras is that no matter what size you buy they’re always too small by the end of the day
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Notes for therapy this week: going “freelance,” helplessness in the face of political tyranny, that thing I said about cocktails, new fear of my own heartbeat (?)
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Despite my cynicism about this presidency I have to agree 🥲
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Actual transcript of Avi’s conference call this morning:
Him: *silent for one hour*
Him: “Have you seen the second half of Titanic? There’s a lot less dancing. Okay see ya.”
*hangs up*
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The dissolution of huge, dominating fashion trends is said to be a win for “personal style,” but what is lost in the pursuit of consumer-based individualism? I wrote about the current state of denim, and fashion more broadly, for the
@nytimes
.
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Quarantine game I’ve been playing for 48 hours: am I short of breath because I’ve contracted a virus that will kill old and vulnerable people or am I just anxious? Pretty bad game don’t recommend
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I hope this wasn't patronizing. I'm not an expert, just a writer who cares, so I welcome any and all clarifications. Thanks for reading this super long thread which, for 30 minutes, became a fairly effective coping mechanism. I hope all this signals a reckoning, not a free fall.
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Thinking about all the Close Friends Instagram stories of people breaking social distancing and bitching about their bosses that I’ll never see...
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The pearl-clutching around students, employees, or websites using bots to write their essays, cover letters, or articles is missing an insight. If these formats are so easy to bullshit a robot can ace them, maybe they were never the vehicles for expression we pretended they were.
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Pasta thots:
Spaghetti is overrated
Mac-n-cheese shapes are superior to shells
Gnocchi is boring
Orecchiette is perfect
Ravioli over-promises and under-delivers
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As an avid podcast listener, I feel qualified to speak on behalf of MailChimp, HelloFresh, FabFitFun, Honey and MeUndies. Call me
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I know I'm broken because on day 3 of "going freelance" I created a Slack workplace and made 20 friends join so we could all talk to each other "like coworkers"
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I just smiled at my cat for a full minute as my eyes filled with tears at the realization that he could never smile back. Bringing this to therapy
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Editors! I love to write about culture, media, the internet, and the emotional rhythms of modern life. You can check out my work on . You may hear from me first (I'm free mid-March), but shoot me a DM or email if you're interested in working together!
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Wrote about the problem with the New York Times telling us we’re “languishing,” then telling us how to “flourish,” ad infinitum
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Just paid over $6 for a cashew milk latte but on the upside it’s bad
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The fact that I feel smarter for having written something and been critiqued is an endorsement of the art of criticism in general. It asks us to not flatten each other and ourselves into whatever we said last, but to see ourselves as fluid agents of ideas.
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Enjoyed talking to
@annawiener
for this piece! It levies some valid critiques against the Substack model. One thing it doesn't really get into though is when the lack of gate-keepers and corporate funding is useful. A lot of good work on there would never be published elsewhere.
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I wrote about the difference between niceness and kindness in politics, inspired by a tweet by
@jordonaut
+ my own shameful past 🤠
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Did you ever notice the word “together” is the phrase “to get her” pushed together? This is my king lear
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Just ate a dry sandwich and half a flavorless quiche for lunch and pretended I was at a catered work meeting 😭
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A lot has been written about the extent to which robots now sound like people, but less about the extent to which people now sound like robots.
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Looking forward to FaceTiming with my therapist like it’s a tropical vacation
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How is this an actual screenshot I took 5 seconds ago and not an IG filter that makes your eyes into little mouths
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He must be so disappointed in us
Wishing Jonathan the tortoise a very happy 188th birthday. He is the oldest known living terrestrial animal in the world🥳
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If you’re looking for a long read to take your mind off of things: I profiled a woman named Abigail Bruley who, at 30, lost most of her memories in a car crash, then had to rebuild her identity through clues and blunt optimism. via
@manrepeller
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A hippo crushing a full watermelon is one of the best things that can happen
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This week I wrote about sex in hindsight, and what happens when those experiences defy definition. What comes after the gray area? My collected thoughts after consuming “A Teacher” on Hulu,
@tavitulle
’s essay in
@TheCut
, and “Allen v Farrow.”
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Testing to see if a drink will burn your tongue by touching it with your tongue
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@annehelen
In a recent newsletter I wrote that the primary tenet of neoliberalism as it’s currently employed is the idea that societal problems can be solved through individual action.
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The backbone of the internet
I have 100 cookbooks written by real chefs and cooks but instead every night I Google “food weeknight dinner fast” and make a recipe from a blog I will never visit again called like Parsnips and Cowlicks or Girl With a Spatula or Hearts of Pam
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Just left a voicemail for a woman I hope will agree to be my therapist and tried to make my voice sound more stable than I am. Excited to see if I get a callback. Is this how actors feel??
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My firmest belief is that my loved ones, in the aftermath of my death, will read my journals under the guise of “getting to know me better,” and I, from the comfort of my urn, won’t believe them for a second.
#38: Don't read my diary when I'm dead
I'll know exactly what you're up to.
haleynahman.substack.com
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Quarantine Log, Day 2: Weird helicopter was hovering outside our window last night, our rations are low because we fucked up our “homemade grain bowls,” we’ve had one Serious Talk, the Cadbury eggs are gone....
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If anyone knows a lawyer, I’ve had “Yummy” in my head for five days/nights and would like to press charges
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My flavor of voyeurism: Texting a colleague at work then watching their face like a hawk for a reaction
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Beautiful how this encapsulates almost everything wrong with 2020
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Currently the saddest thing about me is that I dreamed I had a really popular Twitter account last night
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The saddest thing I’ve done in quar is try to make a Sweetgreen harvest bowl and fail
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Just saw a 7 foot tall man and followed him for half a block like he was a celebrity. He had to duck under an awning! I loved that about him
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There’s no better encapsulation of my hubris than my conspiracy theory that optometrists have been underestimating my prescription for years because I’m good at guessing the letters
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I don't think anything I've written has spurred as much of a reaction as this story I wrote last week about friendship and loneliness. A comforting reminder that we're all fucked up together!
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You should only feel pain when you need medical intervention. It shouldn’t hurt to stub your toe, hit your body on door handles, harmlessly fall down, etc. Really bad design
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It was an approach to the public exchange of thoughts I found really compelling. It made me want to be braver in my own critiques, and resist the black-and-white moralizing implicit in the idea that you either are or aren’t on the same side.
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Before you cast your vote ask yourself if you’re okay with this
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I’d like to apologize to every person I’ve conned into telling me if they think I’m pretty by asking if I could pull off a pixie cut
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