Haley Nahman Profile Banner
Haley Nahman Profile
Haley Nahman

@halemur

Followers
11,589
Following
349
Media
17
Statuses
840

Writer and editor. Subscribe to my newsletter/podcast, Maybe Baby @

New York, NY
Joined August 2011
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
7 years
You may think I complain a lot but the pro/con list my ex made about me in 2008 said I complain a lot AND I'm fun.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
2 years
Googling symptoms after watching 8 seasons of love island
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 months
Years ago someone told me they were invited to a women's lunch in New York hosted by Jill Biden and ahead of the event they were all told in an email that Jill Biden requested no awkward silences
@AlexThomp
Alex Thompson
4 months
Jill Biden is on the July cover of Vogue. Just dropped this AM.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
I wrote about the limits of Emily Ratajkowski's political framework and how it relates to the debate happening in literary criticism about whether comprehension=resistance. (cc @laurenoyler , @xwaldie , Amber Husain)
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Someone asked me how I deal with writer’s block so I made them a chart
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
3 years
Do you ever think about how Sarah Jessica Parker’s name is Sarah
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Already dreading the post-covid personal essays about how, weirdly, people kind of miss quarantine
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Just got emotional thinking about the nerds who made the vaccine 😭 love u
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Mom I’m in the New Yorker!
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
I know awards are stupid and irrelevant but finding out Lily Collins got nominated over Michaela Coel is one of the fastest transitions into a bad mood I've experienced in a while
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
I think it's only fair that we all turn the same age this year that we turned last year. It would work if we all agreed don't be a scab!
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
3 years
22 privilege is if you were 22 when 22 came out
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
My profile of Claire Saffitz and the beloved @bonappetit YouTube channel is up on @ManRepeller today. Didn't put this in the piece but I watched her make a quince tart and then ate it shamefully on the train.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
I've resigned from Man Repeller to go freelance. Feels more than a little like a breakup, but I can't wait to, as they say, ""spread my wings."" Thank you for reading! "The End of an Era, the Beginning of Another, Ad Infinitum" via @manrepeller
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Why do people pronounce carribean differently depending on whether they’re talking about the place or the Johnny Depp movie
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
There's a lot to be anxious about, so I understand if media is not your first concern. But if you're as saddened as I am about the folding of The Outline, or are confused about why media is fucked rn, thought I'd share some thoughts on both. If for no other reason than catharsis.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
I wrote about why quarantine feels so much like depression for @TheCut (and why that comparison might be useful)
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Organizing the dishes in the sink instead of washing them
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Thanks so much for all the support for my latest newsletter. And also for the critiques! I found some of them really thought-provoking and useful.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Today I'm launching my newsletter, Maybe Baby. If people call you an over-thinker, your therapist thinks you're funny but gently fucked up, or you're just kind of lonely, I hope you'll consider smashing that subscribe button.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Me @ 6:15pm: okay now I guess I’ll hop in the shower and get the day started :)
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
You don’t have to “make the most” of a global pandemic.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
2 years
So funny that when my mind is too scattered to focus on something I go on twitter. “It’s hot today, gonna go cool down in a fire”
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Back in my day all we cared about was competitive cheerleading (Netflix's "Cheer," January 2020)
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Practical king
@AlanJohnson
Alan Johnson
4 years
Wait, is Bernie is wearing the same jacket from his meme at the inauguration?
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Quarantine log, day 6: My boyfriend and I are working on a new role-play where we pretend he lives in a different apartment
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
2 years
Anti-social behavior like this is not mature, polite, or cool. It actually makes everyone lonely and neurotic
@Codie_Sanchez
Codie Sanchez
2 years
As an adult, don’t ask your friends to pick you up from the airport. Use uber, save a friendship.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
If you change out of your pajamas before 5pm it counts as getting dressed
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
My newsletter this week is about the insanity of falling in love and the complexity of loving someone long-term, featuring a love letter I wrote in 2017 about losing my damn mind.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Crazy that you’re literally not allowed to look good in quarantine. You have to look gross at all times! I’m sorry :(
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
@jiatolentino For you? A bibliography of your own media blitz.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Maybe Baby #37 is about how our conception of “community” has been skewed by capitalism, why that feels bad, and why I’m turning off comments. Featuring recs by @shamblanderson , David Runciman, @haleymlotek , @jaycaspiankang , @Vinncent , and @rachsyme .
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Big day for winter coats with nipped waists
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
7 years
Hot take: No more celebrities for president please
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
60 days from now, New York yuppies emerge from their homes, bodies softened by a Quarantine 15, faces peeling from trying all their retinols, garbage bags of things that don’t bring them joy clutched in their feral claws....
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Lol the truth of this
@DesiJed
Desi
4 years
Trust me, Democrats could never get it together enough to steal an election.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
3 years
please stop
@nytimes
The New York Times
3 years
Some of us might have full-on burnout after a year-plus of loss, grief and pandemic challenges. Here are some ways to get your motivation back.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Petition to change the “haha” iMessage reaction to “lol” so we seem less dead inside
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
3 years
Celebrities are easy targets for moral policing—and not necessarily the most egregious capitalists—but it’s distinctly American that we rarely target them for greed. This week I wrote about public figures who sell their fans’ attention to brands.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Blessed tweet
@SlambertTweets
Slambert Tweets
4 years
any sanity i’ve retained this year is because of them
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
My weird flex is that I have a piece of Claire Saffitz’s Tupperware
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Fun fact about bras is that no matter what size you buy they’re always too small by the end of the day
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Notes for therapy this week: going “freelance,” helplessness in the face of political tyranny, that thing I said about cocktails, new fear of my own heartbeat (?)
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Despite my cynicism about this presidency I have to agree 🥲
@chunkbardey
charlie
4 years
omg public celebration is such a sweet vibe 🥺
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Actual transcript of Avi’s conference call this morning: Him: *silent for one hour* Him: “Have you seen the second half of Titanic? There’s a lot less dancing. Okay see ya.” *hangs up*
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
The debut of my depression in a legacy publication ❤️
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
3 years
The dissolution of huge, dominating fashion trends is said to be a win for “personal style,” but what is lost in the pursuit of consumer-based individualism? I wrote about the current state of denim, and fashion more broadly, for the @nytimes .
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 months
Deranged behavior
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Quarantine game I’ve been playing for 48 hours: am I short of breath because I’ve contracted a virus that will kill old and vulnerable people or am I just anxious? Pretty bad game don’t recommend
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
I hope this wasn't patronizing. I'm not an expert, just a writer who cares, so I welcome any and all clarifications. Thanks for reading this super long thread which, for 30 minutes, became a fairly effective coping mechanism. I hope all this signals a reckoning, not a free fall.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Thinking about all the Close Friends Instagram stories of people breaking social distancing and bitching about their bosses that I’ll never see...
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
2 years
The pearl-clutching around students, employees, or websites using bots to write their essays, cover letters, or articles is missing an insight. If these formats are so easy to bullshit a robot can ace them, maybe they were never the vehicles for expression we pretended they were.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Pasta thots: Spaghetti is overrated Mac-n-cheese shapes are superior to shells Gnocchi is boring Orecchiette is perfect Ravioli over-promises and under-delivers
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
6 years
As an avid podcast listener, I feel qualified to speak on behalf of MailChimp, HelloFresh, FabFitFun, Honey and MeUndies. Call me
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
I know I'm broken because on day 3 of "going freelance" I created a Slack workplace and made 20 friends join so we could all talk to each other "like coworkers"
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
7 years
I've never been hungry and wanted almonds
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
6 years
I just smiled at my cat for a full minute as my eyes filled with tears at the realization that he could never smile back. Bringing this to therapy
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Editors! I love to write about culture, media, the internet, and the emotional rhythms of modern life. You can check out my work on . You may hear from me first (I'm free mid-March), but shoot me a DM or email if you're interested in working together!
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Just paid over $6 for a cashew milk latte but on the upside it’s bad
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
The fact that I feel smarter for having written something and been critiqued is an endorsement of the art of criticism in general. It asks us to not flatten each other and ourselves into whatever we said last, but to see ourselves as fluid agents of ideas.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Enjoyed talking to @annawiener for this piece! It levies some valid critiques against the Substack model. One thing it doesn't really get into though is when the lack of gate-keepers and corporate funding is useful. A lot of good work on there would never be published elsewhere.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Did you ever notice the word “together” is the phrase “to get her” pushed together? This is my king lear
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
I feel...happy?
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Sharing is no longer caring...who would have thought
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Just ate a dry sandwich and half a flavorless quiche for lunch and pretended I was at a catered work meeting 😭
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
2 years
A lot has been written about the extent to which robots now sound like people, but less about the extent to which people now sound like robots.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Looking forward to FaceTiming with my therapist like it’s a tropical vacation
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
The absolute violence depicted here...... (by @tegaalexander )
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Trump clearly xanned out
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
I'm obsessed with Robert Pattison
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
How is this an actual screenshot I took 5 seconds ago and not an IG filter that makes your eyes into little mouths
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
He must be so disappointed in us
@BerserkAnna
Anna Berserk 🆎️
4 years
Wishing Jonathan the tortoise a very happy 188th birthday. He is the oldest known living terrestrial animal in the world🥳
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
If you’re looking for a long read to take your mind off of things: I profiled a woman named Abigail Bruley who, at 30, lost most of her memories in a car crash, then had to rebuild her identity through clues and blunt optimism. via @manrepeller
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
3 years
A hippo crushing a full watermelon is one of the best things that can happen
@CincinnatiZoo
Cincinnati Zoo
3 years
It’s Fiona’s favorite holiday! Celebrate accordingly 🍉 🍉🍉🍉! #NationalWatermelonDay
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
This week I wrote about sex in hindsight, and what happens when those experiences defy definition. What comes after the gray area? My collected thoughts after consuming “A Teacher” on Hulu, @tavitulle ’s essay in @TheCut , and “Allen v Farrow.”
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Testing to see if a drink will burn your tongue by touching it with your tongue
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Worst thing I said today was “year of the rat indeed”
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
@annehelen In a recent newsletter I wrote that the primary tenet of neoliberalism as it’s currently employed is the idea that societal problems can be solved through individual action.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
6 months
The backbone of the internet
@clhubes
Lucy Huber
6 months
I have 100 cookbooks written by real chefs and cooks but instead every night I Google “food weeknight dinner fast” and make a recipe from a blog I will never visit again called like Parsnips and Cowlicks or Girl With a Spatula or Hearts of Pam
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
7 years
Just left a voicemail for a woman I hope will agree to be my therapist and tried to make my voice sound more stable than I am. Excited to see if I get a callback. Is this how actors feel??
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
My firmest belief is that my loved ones, in the aftermath of my death, will read my journals under the guise of “getting to know me better,” and I, from the comfort of my urn, won’t believe them for a second.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Quarantine Log, Day 2: Weird helicopter was hovering outside our window last night, our rations are low because we fucked up our “homemade grain bowls,” we’ve had one Serious Talk, the Cadbury eggs are gone....
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
If anyone knows a lawyer, I’ve had “Yummy” in my head for five days/nights and would like to press charges
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
My flavor of voyeurism: Texting a colleague at work then watching their face like a hawk for a reaction
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Beautiful how this encapsulates almost everything wrong with 2020
@JThomsonCook
Jeremy Thomson-Cook
5 years
You've invented the lunch break
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Currently the saddest thing about me is that I dreamed I had a really popular Twitter account last night
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
The saddest thing I’ve done in quar is try to make a Sweetgreen harvest bowl and fail
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Just saw a 7 foot tall man and followed him for half a block like he was a celebrity. He had to duck under an awning! I loved that about him
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
What’s the difference between Kid Rock and Bret Michaels
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
There’s no better encapsulation of my hubris than my conspiracy theory that optometrists have been underestimating my prescription for years because I’m good at guessing the letters
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
7 years
I don't think anything I've written has spurred as much of a reaction as this story I wrote last week about friendship and loneliness. A comforting reminder that we're all fucked up together!
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
2 years
You should only feel pain when you need medical intervention. It shouldn’t hurt to stub your toe, hit your body on door handles, harmlessly fall down, etc. Really bad design
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
It was an approach to the public exchange of thoughts I found really compelling. It made me want to be braver in my own critiques, and resist the black-and-white moralizing implicit in the idea that you either are or aren’t on the same side.
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
4 years
Before you cast your vote ask yourself if you’re okay with this
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
I’d like to apologize to every person I’ve conned into telling me if they think I’m pretty by asking if I could pull off a pixie cut
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
3 years
The debut of my parfait stance!!
@NYMag
New York Magazine
3 years
"They took the yogurt bowl that I liked off the menu, and they replaced it with a parfait. I am very anti-parfait. I don’t think yogurt should be vertical." Read @halemur 's #GrubDiet
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@halemur
Haley Nahman
5 years
Humbling to realize I’m bad at twitter
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