James Goss
@gossjam
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Following
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Writes books, produces audio. Lives in a cave. 'A talentless inability to make anything worthwhile' Ian Levine
London, Glasgow, Taunton, Cave
Joined October 2010
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@Faststar001
@ZeldaAGabriel
@SassyCanuckChik
Sorry, I'm from England. We don't have people coming into supermarkets with guns. We think it's daring to bring in strawberries from another shop.
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I loved that Dawn Foster would eyeroll when appearing on the news channels with someone awful:
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Mum is watching a concert by Pavarotti and keeps saying: "this was made before he died, though, wasn't it?" And the alternative is frankly thrilling.
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He keeps turning up at our door demanding sausage. We've called him Grindr.
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"Could you just say it wrong?"
"Why?"
"Can't say."
How did I miss the mavity reference in Torchwood: Oodunnit, less than a month before Wild Blue Yonder aired?
#DoctorWho
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"What are you proudest of writing this year, James?"
Well....
"Something smells nice..." 🥘
Eat like a Noble this weekend! Discover Sylvia Noble's recipe for homemade tuna madras on the
#DoctorWho
website 😋
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Bear with me, but I wish I'd had my Nautical Flag Code tea-towel in my clubbing days:
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Child me: I wish I was living in an episode of Doctor Who!
Adult me: You are, and it's Turn Left.
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Tell me I'm not the last person to know that Miss Evangelista from Silence In The Library married Elon Musk TWICE:
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"Forgive me, Dr Wolf, but I'm not sure IRA stands for Immensely Refreshing Air"
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@Laurak8s
@Faststar001
@ZeldaAGabriel
@SassyCanuckChik
Totally. The English definition of "concealed carry" is hide anything from another shop at the bottom of your bag to avoid an awkward conversation about how yes, you do sell them too, but they're just not as nice.
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İn b&m. Their range of Daleks isn't quite as impressive as you all suggested.
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2018, TARDIS arrives.
Doctor: I'm the Doctor.
Man: Have you earned the right to use that title, miss?
Doctor: *calmly lists planets saved*
Man: But that's just showing off, ma'am, not a medical degree.
Doctor: *states qualifications*
Man: Likely honorary!
Doctor: *sighs*
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Just remembered the time I was interviewing an old Doctor Who person who had sour views about the show.
As an ice breaker, I said "but surely some of it must have been fun?"
"Fun?" he snarled. "Fun! Fun is a women's word used about sexual matters."
İt was downhill from there.
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Interviewed a 102 yr old woman today.
"Do come again," she said. "If it's at 11, we shall have tea. If it's at noon, we shall have gin."
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I remember booking Gabriel Woolf by leaving a voicemail on a mystery phone number and getting a voicemail back: "I'm not dead. And neither is Sutekh".
💥 FLASH SALE 💥 I bring Sutekh's gift of discounts to all Big Finish listeners. Grab a deal on Doctor Who audio dramas featuring Gabriel Woolf as the God of death here:
Offer ends 23:59 (UK time) on 20th June 2024
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#BarryCryer
was once in a green room talking about working with Richard Pryor. "The women! The drink! The drugs! Blew himself up in his wheelchair doing crack cocaine!"
An earwigging Nicholas Parsons turned to a friend. "Have you heard the terrible news about Richard Briers...?"
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@benshapiro
@afneil
I am pleased you exercised your choice to abort the interview for your own reasons before it came to term.
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I got to write for William Russell once and I tried to put everything into it. Because.
@bigfinish
…
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Surprisingly, got arrested getting off the plane this morning at Istanbul airport.
Not how I expected to start my trip.
It turns out.... There is a snake in my village.
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It's a dull Bank Holiday. Have an amazing photo of
@JohnBarrowman
. (And pls order this madness from
@bigfinish
)
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An update on my Turkish house.
Remember the hotel next door had me arrested, briefly imprisoned and found guilty of illegally building the top story of my house when I was 7?
Well....
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So anyway, as I'm stuck under kittens.... TURKISH LEGAL UPDATE.
My legal drama is over.
I have been found GUILTY of desecrating a historical monument, and will avoid a prison term of one year and 8 months if I pay a fine of.... £4.
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@JonDBarker
It's a terrible pose. It's aiming for beach philosopher but achieves festivalgoer who can't face the portaloos.
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OTHER BRANDS: It's Pride Month - let's stick a rainbow on our product.
@bigfinish
: Hold my queer.
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I know Dr. Who's on tomorrow, but is that really a reason to let off fireworks?
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Old BBC boss: I've some interesting Dr Who stuff in the attic.
Me: rushes? Scripts?
Attic:
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1) Govt tracks our internet use
2) Finds out that actually, we just like cats
3) Promises "Your cats safe in our hands"
4) Sells off cats.
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Not many people were still working in their 93rd year... while they had a film on nationwide release. Crikey.
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Doctor Who teaches us to be brilliant, funny and do what you can at a moment of crisis.
Emily gets this.
Some fans who claim to have loved the show longer than her don't. And shout at her.
Which of them is the better fan?
(Just this once it is a competition)
On Saturday 23 May join in with a special tweetalong of AN ADVENTURE IN SPACE AND TIME ✨
With live tweet from
@Markgatiss
&
@sacha_dhawan
You can find the episode on BritBox (they offer a 30-day free trial). Press play at 7pm.
Hashtag:
#London1963
Trailer by
@makemeaoffer_
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Booking a voice actor today was asked to sign a counter-contract promising not to use their performance in AI generation and that was an oh god moment.
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@Emily_Rosina
"How many Doctor Who fans does it take to change a lightbulb?"
"CHANGE?!?!!!?!!?"
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I'm now back at the airport, tired and quite whiffy, waiting 6 hours for the next flight.
I'm sat in the posh lounge, listening to Christmas carols and plotting my next move.
I.
Have.
An.
Enemy.
In.
The.
Village.
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Six years ago I came on holiday for 2 nights to a silly little village thinking "how bad can it be?" and my life changed forever.
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As people are remembering 14 years since Dr Who came back: I was working in the office on the BBC's Doctor Who site. The inbox went crazy. Nearly a 1000 joyous emails. Parents sending photos of happily scared kids! We never got joyous emails, let alone 1000!
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The collective noun for straight white men is "a superspreader".
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Making it
#AllAboutMe
but Stolen Earth is my favourite Dr Who ever because I was DYING during it.
In hospital, figured I'd manage one last Dr Who and that'd be okay. But it was Turn Left and I was STEAMING. Bugger if I'm dying after a Doctor-lite episode and THAT cliffhanger
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There was a photo of the village on the mayor's wall.
An old photo.
With my house on it.
With the top storey intact.
We gathered round it.
"How old is that photo?" I asked the Mayor.
"1950."
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Do Dr Who fans obsessively buy DVDs and Blu-Rays of everything we like because experience has taught us that it might get wiped?
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Davros to address nation later about unauthorized use of travel machine. "We are still following the science and will keep the Kaled race pure..."
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I'm throwing a 50th Birthday Party for Target
#DoctorWho
Books. Do come!
It's on Sunday 16th July
@Bushhallmusic
London, it's called The Target Book Club
TICKETS:
(with help from
@dwbbcbooks
)
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Fans of British telly, doff your caps for today they are demolishing The Castle, legendary BBC pre-rehearsal drinking parlour for Doctor Who and Z Cars.
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Love finding a Dalek picture I've never seen before in a pub loo in Ealing.
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Now, I hate Istanbul traffic. Turns out the best way to do it is in a prison van with the siren going. The windows are down, music is playing, and everyone is smoking.
This is, I realise, the nearest I will ever get to going on the Vengabus.
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It's that magical time of year when I remember an old boss booked the Christmas Party in a sex club and took enough coke to take his train home out of service when he shat himself.
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My timeline has broken with happiness for the first time in ages.
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Twitter 2020: they replace the like button with a block one.
By February the only unblocked account left in our feeds is Larry the Number 10 cat. Then he eats a mouse on live TV. And that's it.
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Let's make Tom Baker a Sunday Times bestseller. If you were thinking of buying a copy of
#Scratchman
, please do it by midnight. It's so close you can feel its fire
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Much as I want to like Jeremy Corbyn, this
#TraceyUllman
thing shows why it's so hard...
CORBYN FANS: We don't hate Jews.
BBC: Airs a sketch about Jeremy Corbyn.
CORBYN FANS: It was the Jews!
(Spoiler: it was not the Jews)
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Normal people confronted by advances in AI: "This is as problematic as it is impressive."
Doctor Who fans: "Marco Polo when?"
This is mind blowing technology. Generative AI will completely change how films are made.
From:
@Flawlessai
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Someone found a box of
#DoctorWho
tin dollies in their loft and ebayed them. So I had to. Find out what MADNESS was inside...
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"We cannot discount the possibility that there were no drones at all." Police on BBC News.
Ohmygod.
#GatwickDrones
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Kind, energetic, commander of any restaurant he sat in. Happily recorded during lockdown perched on bongos. I'll miss his gossipy emails containing the summons to lunch with menaces. An absolute privilege to have known him.
Murray Melvin: actor, director, Theatre Workshop alumnus, archivist and beautiful man, died yesterday. He was 90. I was so lucky to call him my friend. I saw him the day before he died and he was always full of amazing stories from his life. I will miss him so much.
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Torrenting Big Finish is punching down so hard.
When the industry is at a standstill they're still finding a way to employ actors. They're a small firm trying amazingly hard.
Please - buy their stuff. Be a capitalist shill.
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BBC News: "The Prime Minister is likely to feel as though he has been hit by several buses."
But what was on the side of them?
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Just remembered that people got death threats over the 2005 Dr. Who logo, which proves fandoms didn't need twitter for poisonous entitlement.
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Straight people STILL defending *that word* in Gavin & Stacy. Wow.
It's a shame there isn't a word to describe you that makes you viscerally flinch whenever you hear it. Because then you'd know.
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February: Martha returns
March: River Song meets Jack
April: Sir Michael Palin
The
@bigfinish
#Torchwood
team:
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I know this sounds mad, but when got Really Bad a few weeks ago I started scoring every day out of 10.
First week was mostly 2s and 3s, now bumping along at 7s.
Because I started gaming the system and taking time off to watch films or long walks. Just to get a higher score.
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When Barry got home he rang Briers to warn him.
"Listen-"
"I'VE HEARD."
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Do you love
#Torchwood
?
Are you a writer with an agent?
We're keen to get more stories from communities under-represented in our audio range. We'd love some pitches from different voices.
If you want to find out more, send your details to torchwood
@bigfinish
.com
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Anyone who accuses the BBC of a conspiracy has never worked at the BBC. There'd need to be a budget, a charge code, powerpoint decks, fights over meeting rooms and a board accidentally made public.
Anyone who thinks “the media” plots Machiavellian global schemes should spend a week in a newsroom. Once you’ve witnessed news and features forgetting to talk to each other and Xmas taking us by surprise Every. Single. Year., you’ll realise we're incapable of what you imagine.
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Somewhere, David Burton looks up, taps the side of his nose, and smiles.
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Imagine if you'd managed to animate two missing episodes of Doctor Who in 2005 and had to put up with someone haranguing you for months online and by phone with their opinions about them. Would you be enjoying the karma now?
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About a tenth of this amazing project has just been announced. AND DON'T THEY LOOK LOVELY
We are thrilled to publishing two
#DoctorWho
#timelordvictorious
novels, All Flesh Is Grass () by
@unamccormack
and The Knight The Fool and The Dead () by
@SteveColeBooks
- find out more HERE:
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It's occasionally possible to forget how amazing those Dalek films are. Only occasionally.
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BBC News: "The Queen is to step down-"
WTF?
"... from a number of charities."
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