mikey
@fakebenzos
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Following
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We’re the trend setters, you’re the trend sweaters.
Philadelphia, PA
Joined August 2022
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Girls only want one thing…and it’s my adderall prescription every month. 🫰🏻😔
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Unlike a lot of you I do in fact dream of “labor” like any respectable adult male should.
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I work with this fucking asshole who looks like Kramer and he decides to play this 90 y/o six flags ass music on the hour drive home. I’m gonna strangle this idiot
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Best day of my life. Absolute milf and her 3 y/o kid bought the house next to ours. I knew the stars would align one day.
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Gonna take a couple mushroom chocolates instead of adderall today. If I seem off it’s bc I AM
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At my birthday dinner off an addy barely eating anything while sitting across from my brother who’s on suboxone falling asleep into his plate…while my mother chugs red wine and talks about her new boyfriend
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A pic of me with my absolute sister and a pic of me with my biggest, lil bro. 70 degrees and sunny today in Philly wow!!!!
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There is absolute strength in needing others, it isn’t a weakness. But don’t call my phone at 3pm on some nut shit when you know 3pm is Mike time
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This is a picture of my 23 y/o brother that he posted to main, 10 mins ago. What an awesome guy!!!!
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My old man, who was very close to me…passed away, this week like six years ago. Love ya pops! Miss ya all the time! Wish we could take one of these down, one last time.
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The fucking worst Chinese spot in port Richmond fucking exploded earlier
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You’re telling me I gotta pay a cover at the “door” to a punk rock flea market just to browse awful crass/garfield bootlegs ??? What…
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Unlike all of my haters…I have not suffered once from the great American adderall shortage.
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Time & time again…drugs prove to be the solution AND the problem to many things in my life. But that’s the way that the world goes ‘round I suppose
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High on adhd medication in my room replying to every girl’s selfie with “so true queen”
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Hair is long enough again to wear a bandanna around my dome like a hibachi chef
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“Guy blows himself” vid took 45 mins to DL from dial-up internet and it was a guy taking a bullet to his head.
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Walking past Allegheny to hit the bodega, I saw a teenager in a Gel shirt and said “what up antifa?” MF got SO mad 🤣 mboi I’m just stoned…lighten up
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Uber driver said I had to get out and call another Uber bc I smelt like a lb of za
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Just spent tooo much money on plane tix. BUT against all odds I’ll be in Chicago/Louisville the 12th - 16th of January. (For my dreaded birthday)
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Rewind the Kensington Ave livestream camera 3 to 2:29pm and then again at 2:40~2:50pm to watch me buy an adderall off a teenager and then make fun of a bike cop before tripping on my shoe lace and getting made fun of by the bike cop. - Mike
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Thinking about switching my line of work to “working from home on a laptop on my couch” bc you MFs seem to have 100 thousand dollars, smoke pot all day and order doordash. (Had a great day of work today btw)
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Next person that says I look like Anthony Kiedis gotta die. This fool looks like hell
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Huge thank you to everyone for everything last night. It must really suck ass to not be us because my friends fucking rule!!!
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Since it seems a lot of y’all are confused….what love really is…. is to reveal yourself fully to someone and to not withhold, no matter the outcome.
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Got called into work on my one off day this week. That means after today I will have worked 14 days straight of manual labor. Gonna croak any min
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This beverage makes klonopin explode like a bomb in your stomach brother… 👍 😎
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Man I got absolutely no patience for alcoholics…just show up to work on time yo…it’s Wednesday and you’re addicted to beers 😂
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I’m a modern man…I’d let my wife have a girlfriend but there’s not a shot in hell she gonna also date “some guy”
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Adderall is the money pill. I’m either taking one and getting MAD money or I’m selling them and getting MAD money. Either way IM UP
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Sorry libs but ain’t a goddamn shot a rabid west Philly raccoon stands a chance against this size 12 leather boot
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Gonna invite our sexy neighbor and her kid to the BBQ today…I will not be inviting the husband. She looks like she could use a break from life and to be around some hot, funny, charismatic and well-behaved men.
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I want a remote job where I don’t gotta leave the crib SO bad. I wanna sit on my ass and gain 30lbs. It’d do wonders for my mental health.
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Me and Dan Longo doing the manual labor side job on a Sunday while the rest of you busters sleep in and door dash 45 dollars worth of quick stop.
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Gotta unfollow all these cartel and hood news IG pages. Just opened my phone to a vid of a young man’s face getting cut off….need to follow some large breasted bimbos to realign the algorithm
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Off work in 30 mins. Been so greatful for this short work week and lots of nice weather. I can feel my luck starting to change and I can feel a shift in my immediate circle of friends as well. I have a strange feeling everything is gonna be just fine. Enjoy your weekend
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Huge shout out to the addy man and the xan man all being prompt with the holiday serve today. True heroes.
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Working all morning with my boy GREG, forgot how much fun manual labor is when you’re drinking Busch light at noon.
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My mom’s bday today. I’m not home. I’m in Philadelphia. Love you mom!!!!!
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Going to an “ICP” themed bday party tn but instead gonna paint my face like the gay guy from kiss (star on the eye w/da lipstick)
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Okay all my pieces are hitting bc the milf Neighbor just blatantly hit on me. Life is good.
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I haven’t been able to vote in like a decade, never heard of the Philly Mayor…but she put on an entire facade to “clean up” the ave today, strictly for news cameras. The only thing she did was incarcerate my young bouls and move dope fiends outta camera angles. Rot in hell BiTCh
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Last day in KY. Hiking to a waterfall with some beautiful women. What else could a man possibly ask for???
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I HATE MYSELF AND I WANT TO DIE BUT I CANT CAUSE I GOTTA GO TO WORK TOMORROW AND I AINT GOT NO FUCKIN TIME
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Most psychotic piece at the Noc art gallery tn. Pics don’t do it justice.
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@hated4loving
Real men don’t wear shorts outside of the house. I’ll wear denim and move furniture in 90 degree heat before I wear shorts in public
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It’s gonna be 68 and sunny tomorrow. Gonna hit the record store on passyunk then spend a paycheck at machine shop if anyone wants to watch me mansplain French pastry on amphetamines
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You wouldn’t believe my location even if my location services were on
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Smoking absolute ZAZA on the Frankford L in peace & harmony. Not a junkie or yuppie in sight.
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Some fucking grays ferry punk fed me mushrooms at the crusty/south Philly punk party and I walked back in and tripped on a balloon and spilled THREE drinks and everyone is mad at ME!???????
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Secondly, everything “else” in this world is just a substitute for love
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Me and the boys on vacation
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On god in heaven. Now stfu and witness history
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Unexpected epic Friday morning. My new favorite day to have off work.
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Smelling like a pound on the Amtrak. Old woman next to me doing the NY times crossword is mortified.
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The IPhone repair guy saw me pop half an addy while I was waiting for him to fix my screen and then proceeded to get 50 dollars off after I asked if he wanted one. S/O Jarry at Philly phone repairs at the no libs location. This man is one of us.
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I am drunk on two glasses of champagne and a bowl of French fries just like it used to be 👍
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yeah just keep kicking me when I’m down !!! 🫶🏻
an iconic moment of genuine love that made me crack up i love them both so much
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Listening to the world war 4, 8-song demo as the ADHD medication kicks in.
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Can anyone break down what is going on here and why multiple ppl I call “friend” have reposted it? Is metalcore like that 3rd cro mags record? Bc that shit sucks!!! Who tf listens to metalcore? Who TF is this Andrew Francis? I thought this was unfunny irony or sumn but it’s not?
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Blasting rap music walking around the crib like a free man since all of my roommates are gone. Might mop the sidewalk or sweep the ceiling or do push ups til the stims wear off
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Decided I wasn’t gonna go back outside again tonight so I finally caved and DLed the betMGM app and within ten seconds hit a jackpot on a 50 cent slot. So siiiick. Maybe I’ll go back outside tonight now 🤔
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