Kristoffer Dalziel
@diezel_21
Followers
610
Following
1,884
Media
89
Statuses
23,365
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満塁ホームラン
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Pinned Tweet
I've signed up to do the Edinburgh Marathon in May. I'm going to be running for the Glasgow Children's Hospital Charity (Yorkhill)
Any donations would be appreciated. Will be some laugh as I've never ran past 10k in my life
Going to hate myself in may😂
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42 euro for 2 vodkas in Amnesia and the bird moaned I didn't give a tip. Here's one don't eat yellow snow ya cow
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@rhysmurphy77
The biggest event at Sunderland this season was Bruce Springsteen and Beyoncé playing concerts there pal 😂
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I:
⚪️am drunk
⚪️sober
🔘huv hud 3 vodka cokes and am mad wae it
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Hi Manpreet do you want picked up in the morning pal
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Never ever bet against your own team. Bet Airdrie to draw and it done me for £50,000 😥 won 4-1 and I'm sitting face tripping me
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I have a spare for the Old Firm game on the 29th in the Rangers end. Looking for £50 for the ticket
Drop me a text on +447867804324
RT please
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@Browning84Greg
My dogs only gona be alive for 10-12 years so if I can have him with me I will
Had a great morning out with him at beach there and think they’d much enjoy that more than being locked in a crate while I’m away for a few hours
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E I E I E I O
♦️🎮♦️ | Good luck to our representatives at Sunday's
@eScottishCup
tournament at Hampden, Kristoffer Dalziel and John McMillan! All the best, guys... mon the Diamonds!
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Any printing on your top son? Aye francis 1. Aww is that for a son or a nephew? Naw i’m taking to rome for the pope 😂😂
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Kolo Toure was in Slaters in Glasgow today and bought 400 quid worth a boxers 😂😂😂😂
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All fun and games going out all weekend acting a ticket then wake up on Monday realising you're a fat wanker with some comedown and no phone
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Equal pay
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Fuck knows how the keeper got to that. Outstanding no wonder they want equal pay
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boy in ma college just got dumped off his bird. said to him keep the heid up. He said the only time my heads down is when am sniffing lines😂
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Why did they not quit in 2017😂
Clyde FC women's team quit club over decision to take striker David Goodwillie back on loan from Raith Rovers
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at a royal rumble quiz and one teams name was WWE are the people 😂
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Ladies and gentlemen, the queen.
Aston Villa Football Club is delighted to announce the appointment of Steven Gerrard as our new Head Coach. 🟣
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Bet you wish it pulled away now. Get it up ye 😂😂😂
Run 4 busses and this is how they repay you. Some start to the day 😂. Come On The Jags 🇧🇪🇧🇪🇧🇪
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Mad how guys play football for 20 odd years and still be shite but burds do make up for 2 minutes and charge 45 quid a skull for it
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Unfortunately had a few time wasters so this is still available
I have a spare for the Old Firm game on the 29th in the Rangers end. Looking for £50 for the ticket
Drop me a text on +447867804324
RT please
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🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
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Keeper really unlucky there
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Don’t know how folk can watch formula 1 tried to watch for 10 mins there boring as fuck
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What a team 🫡♦️
Full-time: Airdrieonians 6-4 Montrose. It’s the Diamonds who progress to the final after a nice quiet 120 minutes.
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@carsonritchie__
I suppose you were as outraged at him playing when he was captaining Clyde for 6 years ?
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can't believe
@Graeme0908
robbed the thrashbush bookies so he could stockpile on old recipe
@irnbru
. get the old recipe back you're ruining communities
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I wonder if Yves Ma-Kalambay is still kicking a ball about
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What a feeling waking up fresh and skelping a Stella knowing you have
#SpaceClosingFiesta
tonight. Here we!
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When Boris Johnson is wishing you well that's when you know you're the scourge of Scotland
I want to wish
@RangersFC
the very best of luck in tonight’s
@EuropaLeague
final.
I know that you’ll do us all proud.
#UELfinal
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Breaking news. Gerrard not going to take a good position that has become available because he won’t be going with Rangers fans best wishes. More to follow
If he left end of season, he goes with everybody’s best. Leaving now? Absolutely fuck him, gerrard and rangers should never be mentioned in same sentence again. Hope villa goes down and his career over. 🐀🐀
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Trained with them last year and didn’t get signed. This tweet is my official retirement 😂😂😂😂
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@logan_bak
If you hadn’t have deliberately flooded your pitch for the original game this challenge wouldn’t have happened
Fair tackle IMO
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Wow 😂
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Christmas dinner at 6.30am man 🤣🤣🤣
Good morning and happy Thursday you lovely people! Me breakfasts are getting that famous at Dinos that the newspapers have turnt up this morning to take photos! Wishing you all a fantastic day, go smash it! I’m gonna enjoy me Christmas dinner and go smash the day. Bosh ❤️
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@ManpreetPTFC_V5
Maybe if you have a jobbie Manpreet the St Mirren fans will wipe your arse for ye Manpreet
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Is it mandatory to burst out crying if you get injured in a final ?
#liverpool
#realmadrid
#UCLFinal
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Unreal documentary this 👏🏻
🎥🍿| Road To The Hydro: The Open Goal Documentary
Go Behind-The-Scenes with us as we tell the story of how a small podcast idea led to History at the Hydro 🏟
Watch On YouTube 📺
Buy Tickets To Hydro 16th Dec 🎫➡️
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Pumped 🤣
There was no stopping
@HibernianFC
who saw off
@AirdrieoniansFC
4-0 in the eighth feature game of the day. 🙌
#eScottishfootballcup
#esports
#esportsscotland
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Excited to see the uproar here 😂. Wonder what sturgeon will say
David Goodwillie 're-joins' Clyde after Raith Rovers Deadline Day controversy
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He doubled down on a 20 and the dealer turned an Ace. Everyone in the casino cheered.
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@DaftLimmy
They played a video of you doing the 9 10 song in Eden in ibiza last night 😂 check
@IbizaClubNews
instagram hahaha
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That’s Stevie no longer a rat now WATP 🇬🇧
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What a game
TWENTY years ago this week, Championship Manager 01/02 was released. I've put more hours into the game than any other. But why? What made it so good? And why did it, far from stealing my life, actually help put it back on track? This is on
@TheAthleticUK
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Deserve to get beat for this pish
Scotland fans applauding Ukrainian supporters as they celebrate reaching the World Cup playoff final 🇺🇦
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Just saw a heavily pregnant bird chuffing away at a snout down the town centre. Stay classy Airdrie
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Mick Kane
for a long time i have been fascinated with a very particular concept, which is 'small town pathological liars'. if you grew up in a small town you knew one of these directly. i would love to know the lies you have been told
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