Dalton Deschain & the Traveling Show
@daltondeschain
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Pulp horror-punk from NYC. Also creator/writer of the horror comic MONOCUL. Also co-host of @DarkUniversePod . All-around chainsawftie. He/they, moth/man
New York, NY
Joined April 2009
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Well, seeing as how I’ve gained >1k followers this week, I should probably introduce myself. Because if you enjoy my B-52s parodies, chances are you’ll find something to like in my many, many, other projects, which include music, comics, novels, and a podcast
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biggest regret of my life continues to be my decision to not buy this from a thrift store in 2018
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if you see something* say something**
* cows
** ”cows”
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wow, more "thoughts and prayers" from the people with the power to actually do something about it
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would love to hear what "pov" stands for in this tweet
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Here it is. My magnum opus.
“Smooth” by Santana and Rob Thomas, in the style of the B-52s.
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they said it couldn’t be done. they said it shouldn’t be done. once it was done, they said “goddammit this sucks”
yes, it’s “Chop Suey” in the style of the B-52s
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NOW
that’s what I call trauma!
"Sir, I'm working on that PTSD clinical trial poster. Anything specific you want me to add?"
"Make it look like a party. Like it's a rave, like you're hallucinating. That's the vibe we want here at the trial."
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the people demanded it, and
@Eve6
sorta kinda encouraged it (they liked some posts and didn’t explicitly say “no”)
Yes, it’s the heart in a blender song, as performed by the B-52s.
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my mission with the B-69s has always been to cover the most important songs of the year in the style of the B-52s. and this year, no song is more important than “Sitting”
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getting word that these two men were seen fleeing the vicinity of buckingham palace
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come on over to my tiktok if you like nsfw B-52s impressions
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here we go again. Olivia Rodrigo’s “bad idea right” in the style of the B-52s. enjoy, perverts
btw, pls do NOT bring your ex to the Love Shack!! it is not a place for angst
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fuck. fuck!!!
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monitoring this situation very closely
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finally subscribed to Werthers+ so I can catch up on all the latest Werthers Originals
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If you are wondering where the full version is, I put it up for free download along with all my other B-52s covers on Bandcamp. Yes, I am stupid enough to have done this many, many times. T-Swift, Beyoncé, & Harry Styles all got the treatment this year.
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Mia Goth is Anya Taylor Joy’s Wario
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@marydsoco
@smallroundnbrwn
@JackPosobiec
i don't think you are aware of the play marie. if you were you probably wouldn't be so Mad Online
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well, we had to do it eventually, and this year felt like the right time. In tribute! RIP Steve Harwell, you sure wrote a lot of big hits about climate change.
Yes, here’s “All Star” in the style of the B-52s. Finally! 💫
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Midjourney is getting crazy powerful—none of these are real photos, and none of the people in them exist.
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@maga_aloha
@marydsoco
@smallroundnbrwn
@JackPosobiec
ah yes, we all remember the downfall of marx, when he read julius cesar and said "dammit, foiled again"
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I guess I should post this here for those who haven’t seen it
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I, too, love to drive with my hand frozen next to the wheel, whole body tensed in high alert, ready to snap into action when my car decides to swerve into an oil tanker
This is how I move around parking lot.. you don’t? $TSLA
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everything I love about wrestling is summed up by the fact that, faced with a wrestler declaring his homosexuality openly in ring for the first time in a major promotion, the entire crowd immediately breaks into a chant of “HE’S GAY HE’S GAY HE’S GAY”
Anthony Bowens has some news to break to Harley Cameron.
WATCH
#AEWRampage
on TNT!
@platinummax
|
@bowens_official
|
@realbillygunn
|
@itsdanni_ellexo
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what the hell man. what are you doing
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it will only cost $8 and a camrip of The Marvels to put this site out of its misery for good
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this is the premise of
@CerebroCast
media literacy is when you can read a book with no gay sex in it but nonetheless understand that there was gay sex in it
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the hell do you mean "one shot." this was made on computer
THIS IS ALL ONE SHOT. NO CUTS!
The shaky cam and horrible framing of arrowverse action is OVER.
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@joniturnerlaw
i cannot possibly imagine being so fragile and hateful that i would be pissed off by this
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Happy Indigenous Peoples' Day! 🥳A cool way to celebrate would be to donate to the First Nations Covid-19 Emergency Response Fund:
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remember that time noted Nazi-aligned fascist
@jk_rowling
said that trans women had lost the right to presumption of innocence when it comes to accusations of rape?
anyway, cancel your NYTimes subscription and sign
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Um. Hey friends. I have realized that I am happier and more comfortable identifying as non-binary. Pronouns he/they. Kinda scary to say, but I think I’m ready to take the leap. I love you
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a theme park replacing its employees' heritage with its own IP feels copied straight from a George Saunders story
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this one’s for the kittenz. Doja Cat’s “Paint The Town Red,” as performed by the B-52s. feat
@JoKroger
, as always.
Full version now streaming on Spotify, Apple Music, and YouTube! Just search for The B-69s 😎
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Had to bring back the B-69s from hiatus to cover the song of the summer, “Sitting” by
@brianjoralvarez
.
And thanks to
@Lubchansky
for the inspiration!
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Yes, I still have more of these.
I couldn’t let this year go by without turning Harry’s House into the Love Shack, so enjoy “As It Was” in the style of the B-52s. This was a tough one to crack!
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@Lubchansky
“hey fred schneider, what are you doing”
becoming the mayor and criminalizing the homeless!
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why does he look like dril’s profile pic
Zaslav getting hit with a Pay Your Writers chant in Boston. This is so good.
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Walt Disney’s last words were “Kurt Russell” and no one knows why
Basically everyone has a “John Lennon beat his wife” style fact that they cant stop themselves from sharing if anything even tangentially related comes up in conversation
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if you slip the cashier a benny they let you milk the Grimace yourself ☺️
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The Initiative to fascist governor pipeline
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is there a 33 1/3 about the B-52s’ Cosmic Thing? Should I pitch one??
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The last meme you have saved is gonna sum up your summer 2023 for you
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just had our family portrait done by the phenomenal
@kendrawcandraw
. What do you think, does it capture each of our essences?
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this is actually hall of fame two sentence horror
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*tapping you on the shoulder* liefeld tom cruise
*tapping faster and almost yelling* Liefeld Tom Cruise
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physicists have built this device to predict the theoretical outcome of an entire squadron of cops going down the long slide
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I really love Rebecca Ferguson, but it’s too bad she’s a nepo baby. her father, Turd, won a bunch of money on jeopardy and basically bought her career
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girls love to say they’re sapiosexual until they get asked on a date by alistair from Psycho Goreman
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they see me rollin. they-hattan
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cuomo getting revenge by leading all of the italians out of nyc like the pied piper
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TJ Mack becoming an actual celebrity is so surreal
TIME magazine with TJ Mack: “Love it or hate it” hosted by the brilliant
@MoisesFenty
@TIME
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My aunt told me she wants to come visit NYC and she said “I want to see the 9/11.”
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wake up, neo, and know me better man!
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@motelsiren
lmao didn't even attempt one of these
“Trump might go to jail for paying hush money. No amount of money could hush me up about how much I miss you, girl” -free text to send someone if you’re an idiot
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congrats to harry styles I guess but I had already given him the most prestigious prize of them all
Yes, I still have more of these.
I couldn’t let this year go by without turning Harry’s House into the Love Shack, so enjoy “As It Was” in the style of the B-52s. This was a tough one to crack!
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incelebration, florida
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@dreamoforgonon
it’s always strange to me when ppl push back against this idea because the characters are corporate IP. like, of course the myth-building of a modern world dominated by capitalism would be inextricable from capital. that’s the world we live in! it doesn’t negate the similarities
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they don’t lohve you like I lohve you
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real time audio of enormous infant
@elonmusk
wetting his pants and crying
Holy Shit. Elon Musk just popped into a Twitter Spaces chat with a bunch of journalists. He was called out by journalist Drew Harrell, who he banned, for lying about posting links to his private information, then leaves almost immediately after being pressed. Here is the exchange
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@timheidecker
Doug Prishpreed is KILLING it this season. When is his Sports spinoff happening?
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I’m so sorry to do this to you all again, but I have unfortunately released another EP of modern pop songs performed in the style of the B-52s.
The whole EP is on bandcamp, but if you want to skip to the main event, here it is:
WAP.
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At this point in my life, I no longer wish to make pokemon fight. I want to take cute lil pictures of them horsin around and diving into lakes from the safety of my photo buggy
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Jack Antonoff has spent his whole career making A24 trailer music in preparation for this moment
Michaela Coel and Anne Hathaway to star in new
@A24
film from director David Lowery.
The film will follow the story of a fictional musician and her relationship with an iconic fashion designer.
The music will be written and produced by Jack Antonoff and Charli XCX. 👀
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Every so often I have to google the film Predestination to make sure I didn’t dream it. It’s an Ethan Hawke/Sarah Snook movie about a time-traveling intersex assassin who discovers that, through time paradoxes & gender reassignment surgeries, he is his own mother, father, & child
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i'm sorry I can no longer keep up with liking everyone's replies and quote tweets but I love you all and I'm glad you love/hate this year's B-69s output. more coming very very soon
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when you plant the LL Bean you get
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this is a fun feature I can get behind! Twitter will now double as a mobile game where the goal is to completely empty your For You page as quickly as possible by blocking every single account that shows up there!
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well, it’s the stupidest time of the year. I’m back with more pop songs performed in the style of the B-52s.
Kicking things off this year with a topical throwback track, here’s Britney Spears’ “Toxic.”
2021 hits coming tomorrow. I will not stop til one of you kills me
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