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@cstanderfer
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Whife of Delores Cheesecake. I like puns and books.
Richmond, VA
Joined March 2009
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@realgirl_fieri
@_samantha_joy
Much easier with school aged children and teenagers than littles! We used to leave at 4am & all of us would pile in the car and go back to sleep. When we came around sometime around 9am my dad would find somewhere for breakfast. Lots of good road trip memories from those years!
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@Nicole_Cliffe
I had latest curfew in high school so friends always slept over. Parents got smart with caller ID & would make us call from landline to prove we were home by a certain time. But I had my own phone line. we’d hide the portable phone in the mailbox, do a drive by, then go back out.
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@Bookemdanno949
@Northernsirena
We understand how to do all of those things and do them when we need to. Why won’t olds understand that sending a fucking email is 10x more efficient than a fax machine?
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@Krasdale
@lillith_s
@dudemahoney
@1_div_0
@awomanskwarned
@nick_____t
I know we’re talking BOH but this brought back memories of glass breaking and getting in the ice bin behind the bar. Always happens in slow motion and is almost always a chain reaction of events involving a drunk customer during peak hours.
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@Imgio___
@xiiQuan
@Mavee_Masikane
@TorpedoGnome
@omede_precious
@K_Osayi
Idk how y’all listen to a voicemail from a parent who has passed. It’s been almost 7 years, and I’m doing okay now, but I have one saved from my dad that I still can’t listen to. I’m afraid it will break me past the point of repair.
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@emilykmay
Apparently there’s a whole thing about 7 years? I went to a spin class the morning of my wedding & some woman I’ve never seen outside the gym said “wait 7 years. see if you can stand him anymore” and I was like uhhh we’ve been together 7 years and I very much like him??? Also WTF
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@thepbg
@greendoondoon
@emmeneeez
Omg I forgot about the Fail whale and now I have to go pour one out for it
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@andibartz
@KMadMcLean
I think people who long for children/have always wanted to be a parent honestly can’t comprehend the dichotomy of loving children AND potentially resenting them. I’m a great aunt. I love kids SO MUCH! But I question how well I’d handle hard parts. I’m better in a supporting role.
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If you are a little weirdo and live in Richmond and have never participated in the cone parade, I highly recommend it!
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@bbbadpussy
@OgLakyn
@JessikaKayy1
Good lord. She’s saying you don’t need to purchase 15 portable beverage vessels just because they’re the current “it” item. Anyone being defensive about this likely knows they are part of an over-consumption problem. If you regularly use most of the things you own, you’re good.
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@billpresson
@MdSheryl
@PereraJacob1
Is it though? Over qualified people tend to be easy hires, learn quickly, and do their job well. I think the actual problem is that they perhaps teach their coworkers a thing or two about not suffering shitty management and demanding more for themselves. And big biz hates that.
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@TheAmberPicota
@lazy_fem
I’m also a huge introvert (& total ham w/ my people!)
I’m almost 40 & still sometimes need a push to attend events - sometimes it’s a blast, sometimes I need to leave early. Both are fine! You’re doing great as a parent! Encouragement to TRY to attend w/ option to duck out is 💯
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🗣 🗣🗣 PEDESTRIANS HAVE THE RIGHT OF WAY, STOP ALMOST HITTING ME WITH YOUR CAR WHEN THE WALKY MAN SAYS IT’S MY TURN TO WALK
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About to start screenshotting every other paragraph in
@IjeomaOluo
’s So You Want To Talk About Race so I can leave the photos with zero comment (besides a citation) in 75% of Facebook posts I read.
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@amandadeibert
When my dad died, one of my little sister’s best friends wrote this. It will be 4 years in October. I miss him every day and will never be able to read it without crying, but I appreciate this memento so very much.
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@tweetwithashlee
@wyetthasspoken
The part where they literally said no one enjoyed the dying part of the pandemic?
“You enjoyed receiving basic income for the first time. You enjoyed not having to work for survival for a few months. You did not enjoy millions of people dying.”
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@nomanautomata
@christress
The reason we feel crappy is because an 8 hour work day 5 days is too much!
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@MegStEsprit
I logically know my parents got fed up with me and lost their temper with me (well deserved I’m sure 😂), but I honestly don’t really remember those parts. I do remember the times they handled me gently and took me for ice cream. Your kids are adorable and you’re doing great.
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Kamala Harris takes no prisoners. I love her.
BREAKING: DHS Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen is resigning. Flashback to Kamala Harris dragging her for FILTH.
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Every time I see white dudes throw out “he wasn’t complying!” I think about the # of times I’ve seen drunk frat boys get mouthy or physically combative with police when being asked to stop a behavior/leave a place. Same ones who absolutely flip if you call racism racism.
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@YoungerLauraC
@diannao
@_AdeleBuck
@cdr
@mollytelfordMRX
@velobabe
@LaszloBock
Put your avocados in the fridge once they’re ripe and they will last at least another week. I’m terrible at avocado ripeness management and this saves me every time 🙌🏼
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We could do this with carytown but noooooo we need our vroom vrooms!
Newark Street in Jersey City went car free a few years ago and I just wonder why we didn’t do it earlier…
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Some lady in a minivan just honked at me and my 10 year old dog in a crosswalk because she wanted to turn left, and I guess we were taking too long for her liking. If you think I turned around and just stood there and stared at her until the light turned yellow, you’d be correct.
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@andibartz
@KMadMcLean
Just speaking to my personal experience, of course it’s also fine if people don’t love kids - as long as they aren’t rude and abrasive toward them in places where children should be more than welcome to exist.
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Wouldn’t it be cool if we celebrated NYE with a ball drop at like 6pm so we could all just get day drunk but then hydrate and be in bed early?
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I’m so sick of drunk people in the fan doing this shit. This is our porch. There are HUNDREDS of alleyways. Booo. She’s peeing next to a public sidewalk so I don’t really care about her privacy.
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If another old white person posts a meme along the lines of “politics isn’t a reason to lose a friendship” on FB, my head may very well explode. It translates directly to “it’s unfair to face consequences of my absolute shit core values.” Others are losing a lot more, Aunt Ida!
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@meghanttucker
Absolute queen. But also, the audacity of both of them, damn. I’m sorry you went through that, especially with an infant and all those hormones coursing through your body!
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I should just leave this FB wedding group I'm in. Some woman asked for tailor recommendations, adding "I am located in Glen Allen but will consider traveling to Richmond if there is someone you rave about!"
Ma'am. It's a 10 mile drive. You are not crossing the Drake Passage.
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@tressiemcphd
1) het men get no opinion unless they want to compound on the FACT that Adam Driver is hot
2) find a good tall man and never look back because that *signal drop*
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Starting
@AkilahObviously
’s Obviously annnnnnd the first page has me 😂
I already got beef with Ms. Murphy.
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@melissagira
@tressiemcphd
This is an absolute must for anyone who travels regularly. My “unpacking” is basically clothes and shoes only. Everything else just goes back on a shelf in its travel bag. I’ve forgotten toothpaste, deodorant, and hairbrushes too many times to mess with it anymore.
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@rachsyme
A friend lent me Louise Erdrich’s LaRose after I said I hadn’t read it and.... whew. Like I got done, laid the book on my chest and stared at the ceiling while my eyes leaked for 30+ minutes. It will be one of my top picks for the year.
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A driver hit and killed another person trying to cross chamberlayne ave and a certain 4th district council person is really out here tweeting “pray for peace” and propping up the police and good golly can we just get some damn pedestrian infrastructure in this city?
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I’m sorry, did
@CBS6
just report that officers “simply could not” do anything about people being armed while lobbying the state capitol today because they are in groups of 11 or less?
RPD continues to be utterly worthless.
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@JD_Jonny
@chlomill_
@ElegantSavant
@MKuchta13
Pretty sure a strange man entering your hotel room at 4am qualifies as “something bad”
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The older I get, the more I vehemently refuse to feel bad about taking time for myself. Tomorrow is my birthday. I took off work & just booked a 2 hour appointment at a float spa around the corner for a 1 hour float followed by a one hour massage, and I am very excited about it.
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Honestly, there’s rarely anything to NOT do in Richmond! I’ve been here 12 years now and still routinely see people posting stuff after events/festivals/random happenings and am like “why didn’t I know about that?!”
It’s the best little medium-sized city 🥰
Is there anything to do in Richmond? I wonder every time I drive through
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@TheAmberPicota
@lazy_fem
I’m not even sure where this will end, but I know you love your kid and are super protective of them. Round of applause 👏🏻 👏🏻 👏🏻
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@KalhanR
I can’t help you with the architecture, but I’m from the Dallas/Fort Worth area and women have been wearing this hairstyle for decades, so it’s certainly achievable on a human head. There’s a teasing brush and a lot of hairspray involved. Maybe that’s the architecture 😂
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You know what I am so tired of the "let me know how i can help!" people who never actually help. Especially since i so very rarely ask. If you are that person, you suck.
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I love
@BambooCafeRVA
. Only place in town whose mimosa is cheap champagne over ice in a pint glass with *just* a smidge of OJ. My trash ass loves it.
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I know I posted on IG, but my community garden is so far the saving grace of 2020. It’s my 4th summer w/ this plot, but the rain, cool overnight temps (for now), our new beehive, and a thoughtful/planned base for compost & fertilized soil are giving unprecedented results. My joy.
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find it thoroughly interesting that 300 Facebook “friends” will like a picture of my husband and me at the river, but when I post anything regarding BLM or donating real money, it drops to about 37.
(I don’t find it interesting at all, I’m making a list. Go fuck yourself)
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Today, it’s been 5 years since my dad died from gastric cancer. It was sudden, and traumatic, and awful. I run from this day every year. And every year I fail.
And that’s okay. Remembering is good. But it’s still hard.
Anyway. Live every day to the fullest. It’s not a cliché.
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Not being able to “just let things go.” It’s called conviction, and good luck getting me to sit down and shut up.
What's something you hated about yourself as a kid or teenager that you now consider a strength?
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@dbishopii
@punished_cait
Unless you develop apnea, snoring is really more based on how your air flow holes are structured. If you’ve never woken yourself up snoring or the person who shares your bed hasn’t mentioned it, you’re fine. Light snoring also isn’t a big deal. Apnea is.
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Heyyy Twitter fam, guess who we busted out of the doggy ER today?!
It’s been a long 80 hours without her home, but we can’t thank the staff at Virginia Veterinary Centers enough for loving on our girl while they gave her incredible care ❤️
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People truly get so mad when you make them stop at the designated and clearly marked pedestrian crossings. I’m done playing. I’ll step in front of your car. You can pay a fat lawsuit if you hit me.
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My two hour spa treatment to myself was just as wonderful as I hoped. Came home to my laundry folded for me and
@Jackgoesforth
prepping everything for dinner. I am now on the couch with a 3:30 glass of red wine. Quite pleased with my day. QUITE PLEASED, INDEED.
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Everyone: wow what a nice evening
Guys on motorcycles: lol we’ll see about that - VROOOOOOOMMMMMM
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@tressiemcphd
100% convinced I would be completely unhireable if cell phone cameras had been decent quality in my 20s 😂
Feel bad the youngins will never know that freedom.
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I admittedly don’t wear a helmet often, but helmets are really to protect your head if you fall off your bike going fairly fast, not to protect you against a car bulldozing you, which I’m guessing a high percentage of these deaths are.
For idiots who think cycle helmets equal safety. They don't.
Disagree and evangelise, guilt trip etc and win a free block..
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Just saw a protest sign that said DON’T BE SORRY. BE BETTER.
That’s the energy I’m here for.
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@iamspartacus13
@gobluespokane
@saltyjello_
@TheShawnMorris
@kremedelakitty_
I mean, bouillon is broth, made from vegetables and chicken parts, so a cube of dried chicken parts and seasoning that you add to water to make broth... is bouillon.
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It’s 8:30am and I am fighting with people on my husbands Facebook post. Didn’t even bother putting my rage pants on one leg at a time today. Just jumped right in. GONNA BE ANOTHER GREAT DAY.
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If you aren’t big on IG, here’s a pupdate for you. Maya says thank you for all the support!
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I reeeaaaally wanna know where people are in such a hurry to get to as they fly down residential side streets in the fan at 45mph. The line for $20 pancakes at SB’s love shack is gonna be just as long 5 minutes from now. Please slow down.
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I’ve held off on posting anything about Afghanistan, because I don’t have anything to contribute besides being sad. I wish this country was less violent, that we didn’t see ourselves as such heros, that every solution didn’t have to be so politically polarizing. But here we are…
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@sunnydaejones
@Issyloveshoney
This! And then when we were like “but what about other foods?” It was just like “nope they only ate potatoes!” Instead of explaining the exploitation, theft and exportation that occurred.
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My dad used to always say “stress is just pressure without a plan.” When I feel overwhelmed, I always sit down and map things out until it feels manageable. Can still hear his voice saying it.
What is a random piece of micro-advice your parents gave you? Not advice on big or significant things, but nevertheless something you’ll never forget.
My mom used to say “One dog is a pet. Two dogs is dogs.”
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Lmfao they threw the Christopher Columbus statue in fountain lake. I’m not even mad at the loud ass helicopters. I love this fucking town so hard right now.
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We’re at the point where 75% of our clothes smell, we’re tired, miss our dog like A LOT A LOT, and are generally ready to go home. Thankful for one more day in Portugal, but here’s the real stuff. Everything is incredible until HOME is better & maybe that’s the real lesson.
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I don’t know who need to hear this, but if you’re the type of person who completely disregards deadlines and then expects everyone to drop everything and help you right before a meeting begins, you’re an asshole and I guarantee all your colleagues talk about you behind your back.
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If your car is parked on the northbound right shoulder of Arthur Ashe, there are at least 10 tow trucks out there about to ruin your morning.
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Is everyone having a fuckin week? Because it sure seems like it. At least we’re all in it together?
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Men I know: hey watch out for that J&J vaccine, 6 out of 7 million people who got it had blood clot issues.
Women I know: why the fuck is no one working on this issue when it comes to hormonal birth control?
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Fully vaccinated bitches! Never been so happy to be in a Walmart. Where my J&J jabronies at?
And now I get to go to my sister’s baby shower in a few weeks, which I was sure I’d have to miss. My eyes are leaking.
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@feltso
@Ninja__3x
@OliviaNBC12
@Ninja_3x
Not sure why the police would be “enforcing” a curfew that was lifted a week ago, but keep doing whatever mental gymnastics you need to in order to defend these goons....
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Better beer
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Picked up my new glasses this morning. I adore them.
Had lasik years ago and my vision is still pretty good but I’ve been squinting a lot lately in meetings and that’s just unnecessary. Happy Valentine’s Day to my peepers! Eye health is important y’all. Treat ‘em well.
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@markvauxhall
@RyanWBeam
@the_transit_guy
It’s a failure of infrastructure BECAUSE of the types of people who inhabit suburbs in the US - they specifically vote against accessibility. They choose these neighborhoods for racist and classist reasons and want no part of public transit making their neighborhoods accessible.
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@oldenoughtosay
I agree 1000% with what you’re saying but I also don’t think there’s a universe in which his body composition allows for 215. That’s a fairly low weight for a 6’3 man with extreme muscle OR fat. Trump has the body of my late father who was 3 inches shorter & weighed 265-270.
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Sorry if you have already seen this because you follow me on Instagram, but I’m just so obsessed with the cake I made for my MIL’s bday.
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It’s a beautiful day for a short bike ride over to the registrar’s office for early voting. 2134 W Laburnum
Anyone can vote here regardless of district/precinct
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If you’re the type of person who responds to suicide with anything along the lines of ‘wow so selfish’ or ‘if I was a parent I would never....’ then you are a huge asshole with no empathy. Full. Hard. Stop.
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Sneak in booze. Buy a popcorn. I'm not even talking mini bottles, I've taken entire 6 packs into movie theaters in my giant hobo bag.
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Mom: did you see the present I left on your bed?
Me: *running into room* No! What is it?!
Her: if it doesn’t fit I can retur-
Me: *slides into kitchen a la risky business* TUMBLE OUTTA BED AND I STUMBLE TO THE KITCHEN.....
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My Lyft has seat warmers in the back seat! I’ve never ridden in a car with them in the back. I love it.
Would give 6 stars if I could.
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When did we replace all these? A month ago? Such a waste of time and money when we know people are out here playing super Mario bros with these signs. You can see where the 2nd one used to be.
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I love Virginia, but Texas will always be home. Straight from DFW to Mi Cocina - it’s a family tradition at this point. Mambo taxis, queso blanco, Tacos de brisket, and the company of my Mom and this gem of a human. My heart is full 💕 🌮
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Opting for a long walk instead of the gym today and
@jackgoesforth
grabbed his mask “just in case we go somewhere” which means he probably already knows which brewery he wants to go to 😂
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Had to pick my first 🍉 early due to a rotten spot that could’ve potentially ruined the whole fruit. Not quite as sweet as it should be, but I don’t care. I grew a freakin’ watermelon! RVA rude boi
@jackgoesforth
is unimpressed, but then again I heard he’s been taking idiot pills
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Wedding planner asked what the final song was gonna be before our exit and if you think I didn't pick "I Wanna Dance With Somebody" so I can screech sing while waving one of the 200 light up tambourines we're ordering YOU DO NOT KNOW ME
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Had every intention of being super productive today. Ended up drinking wine on the porch and finishing a book in one sitting instead. And you know what? That was the better choice anyway.
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Arrived home to the new couch and I love it so much. Just need to get pictures hung on the freshly painted wall and get all my plants in place
(and I guess the 🎄 since everyone else is doing it already) 🥰
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