Ciru Muriuki 🇰🇪
@CiruMuriuki
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Journalist. African Woman. Fact-checking, data journalism, and voraciously consuming knowledge. Views are mine.
Nairobi, Kenya
Joined December 2008
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Pinned Tweet
If we observed a minute of silence for every one of the estimated 10 million Africans killed in King Leopold’s Congo, we would be silent for 19 years.
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I just put my foot in my shoe and felt something cold. Turns out it was a gecko. My soul has left my body. Goodbye.
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Why do university brochures show students laughing while doing a group assignment? Who ever laughed during group work? Lies. 😒😒
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I had my third surgery for endometriosis yesterday. I’m feeling a little battered and bruised, but ok otherwise. We need a cure.
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This weekend while at a petrol station, I struck up a conversation with the attendant, who proceeded to tell me that COVID-19 is fake, a ploy to get donor funds. That broke me, because my father died of COVID-19.
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A seven year old child woke up today, happy and carefree. Right now he's in the morgue, shot while playing on his balcony. It doesn't matter who you support. Geoffrey Mutinda is dead and there can be no justification.
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You cannot pretend to have an ounce of humanity while celebrating the killings of your fellow Kenyans by police.
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Is it possible to love God but reject mainstream religion and everything it stands for?
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If memory serves,
@EliudKipchoge
once ran the Berlin marathon with damaged insoles, finished with bloodied feet, and won with a time of 2:04.
“When a shoe company puts multiple carbon plates in a shoe with cushion between the plates, it is no longer a shoe. It’s a spring and a clear mechanical advantage.” — Runner
@ryanhall3
on Eliud Kipchoge’s unreleased Nikes for his sub 2 marathon.
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There’s something Muslims do that’s super inspiring. Whenever we make plans to meet, we say “I’ll see you tomorrow” or next week, or next month. But Muslims always add “In shāʾ Allāh”, meaning if God wills it. Because tomorrow is never promised. I love that. ❤️
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I have always wondered why the people that are supposed to serve Kenyans really treat us like we’re their enemies. Police. Kanjo. Civil servants. Everywhere we go to seek services, we’re treated like garbage. This needs to be studied aki.
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So. That Pwani University student was stabbed for refusing money. What’s your explanation now?
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We need do do the following :
1. Stop making jokes about corruption. Yes, humor is a Kenyan coping mechanism, but it contributes to normalization of shit that shouldn't be normalized.
2. Actually get angry and refuse to be placated by cosmetic measures. We're not angry enough.
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The 6 months isn’t for learning the law. It’s for intensive anti-citizen indoctrination. That’s why the only qualification is teeth.
Guy said, "Make the police academy a 4-year program and I bet we will get rid of the incompetence and corruption. I went to school for 6 years to understand the law enough to practice it but it takes them 6 months to learn it and enforce it? Get out of here!!! 😁
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Aki let's just have a king or something. From a smaller community. Like a Teso or Kuria. I am tired.
#Ballot2017
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So a guy pushes you from the 12th Floor of a building for refusing his advances, because you were "too loose".
I can't even engage with this logic. Women are loose for having sex, and loose for refusing it. We can't win.
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Maybe I’m a fake feminist, but si being called an entire meal by your person is cute/sexy?
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I was asked to cut my locs by a boss. I didn't. Opportunities continued to pass me by at that station. I finally left and now I work at the BBC with my four year old UNCUT locs.
When I worked at local TV station, I was told I couldn’t present the news in my Afro coz it was“inappropriate”
I had to wear weaves basically.🤦🏾♀️
Well now, I’m presenting a show on
@BBCAfrica
, wearing my AFRO in all its “inappropriate” glory.
#TheSheWord
@CiruMuriuki
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This week has seen a dust storm and now bats. Should we paint our door posts with the blood of a lamb?
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I am not
@MissCiku
. I haven’t written a book. I never hosted a show named Busted. And I haven’t tweeted anything about dogs. Aki please I was just doing my juice cleanse in peace.
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So. A young woman is brutally murdered. A rumor about her relationship and HIV status begins to circulate and we believe it with zero proof. Her friends come put to refute this claim, suddenly they are liars who need to provide proof.
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Bob Collymore redefined leadership. His legacy is unmatched. Imagine 4 months maternity. Crèche at work with qualified care givers. He realized that an organization was made of PEOPLE. what a legacy. Travel safe, Bob.
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Are you okay????? 🙆🏾♀️
Handing over two Hand Carts which cost 20K each equipped with water tanks for the distribution and sale of clean water to sustain their families.
#passarisfoundation
#juakali
#touchinglives
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Disconnect is a classic case of wasting good actors with writing that made no sense. I struggled my way to the end of the film and I have thoughts. 🧵
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Yaani we have refused social distance KABISA. IG is just full of people who went out last night.
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Uhuru’s speechwriter has a strange, clunky, verbose style that is really exhausting to listen to.
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The Instagram algorithm started showing me beautiful homes in Europe that cost the same as an apartment in Kileleshwa, and more and more I realize that our local housing market is an active crime scene. A basic apartment with zero storage costing more than a Tuscan cottage. How.
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I had surgery about 2 months ago at Nairobi Hospital. They were cool with me wearing my own clothes. I had my own hoodie on. It's hospital, not prison.
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I’m out of the hospital and back home. Thank you so so so much for your positive vibes. Let the road to healing and wholeness begin. ❤️
I had my third surgery for endometriosis yesterday. I’m feeling a little battered and bruised, but ok otherwise. We need a cure.
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"Fluffy" and "Snowy" are the Jayden and Ethan of dog names.
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Guys, would you buy sanitary towels/tampons for your significant other?
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Good things are coming. Good things are coming. Good things are coming.
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My father died and I’m the exorbitant bill we had to pay following his death, we paid 8000 shillings every time someone wore PPE to attend to him. Answer the second part of your own question yourself. Thanks.
What is your worst
#COVID19
experience? What could have been done to make the experience less undesirable?
#KomeshaCorona
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Drinking game: Shot every time Dr Kaluyu says universirry or poverrry or communirrry.
#PresidentialDebateKE
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That very real adulting moment when you look at the things you want versus the money you have, then you realize that you may have to join a cartel. 😩
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Are we seriously going to support the brutalizing of a community just because we don't agree politically??
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Now that the murderer gave his side of the story and HIV did not feature anywhere in his account of events, what new moral contortions are we going to go into to blame Ivy for her murder?
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DJ Mo: I am a Christian.
Also DJ Mo: Njoki Chege is a single mother who can't keep a man.
This is why I feel 0 for these "gospel" people.
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Putting aside your ego is perhaps the hardest thing to do when you’re in a relationship. Fighting the need to be right is hard work. I know I’m struggling with this.
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The day people will learn the difference between the Mt Kenya Mafia and the Kikuyu tribe as a whole is when this foolishness will stop.
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Heh. Losing a father. Nothing prepares you for the pain. Nothing.
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There’s reunions, then there’s this.
@LarryMadowo
@eddiebutita
@Jahmbeekoikai
thank you for the best laughs I’ve had in a while. 🤣
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Seated.
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So. We're judging a murdered woman more harshly than her murderers. OK.
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After I cut my Locs, lots of people were like “ah yesss, good natural woman, stop wearing wigs”. Never mind that I have never owned one. Now I want one...just to shake the table.
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There is a kikuyu mother right now amewashwaaaa kuona watoto wamerelax. Those kids right now have been told to wash the gate, dust the plants and sweep the roof.
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We cannot condemn the killing of George Floyd while ignoring how Kenyans are brutalized at the hands of a police force that has changed little since the colonial era.
#JusticeForVaite
#JusticeForSamuelMaina
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Prayers to all of you grappling with the pain of losing a loved one. Tuko wengi. May God be our comfort. ❤️
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A story I did more than two years ago regarding passport privilege. Worth a second look given what's happening right now with Ferdinand Omanyala.
"Kenyan citizens must fulfil a long list of requirements for a visa to the UK - whereas UK citizens can get a visa to Kenya on arrival."
#Factfinder
's
@CiruMuriuki
takes a closer look at passport privilege ✈
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We need girls and women to understand that horrendous period pain is not normal.
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I just want people to realize that Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah” is really about sex and to stop singing it in church.
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Calling for credible election is NOT a call for violence. I don't know why this is so hard to grasp.
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The Aga Khan Hospital COVID-19 hotline works, and the people manning it are calm and well informed. Well done
@akuhnairobi
#COVID19KE
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My friends. I never thought I would hear "universirrrrry" and "ndigreee" in the same sentence.
#debatesKE
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People seem to think that it's ok to say anything you want, and use the defense "I was just being honest". Ngoja life ikuchape na mtu akuje akwambie ufala and then hides behind "honesty" ndio ujue an opinion can also be kept to yourself.
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When Dedan Kimathi wa Waciuri was captured, he was shot in the thigh by a Kikuyu home guard. Kimathi asked him, "Is it you who shot me?" He said yes. Kimathi said, "Ni wega." (It is well.)
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Oh did I tell y'all how I was forced out of a job because of a facebook post that my bosses decided was about them? Kwanza let me see them contributing to this TT.
#ToxicWorkSpaces
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You cannot tell me that being Kenyan isn’t an extreme sport. If we can survive here, we can survive anywhere.
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I’m waist deep in my thirties and I’m so jealous of these queens in their 20s living their best, unfettered life. 25 year old me could never. I stan.
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Meanwhile, our national anthem just played in front of a packed stadium in London as Faith Kipyegon picked up her gold medal.
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While your favorite politician is handing out money trying to buy your vote,
@bonifacemwangi
is changing the game!
#StareheNiBonnie
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More than 6.5 million people voted for Raila Odinga. They are hurting. Remember that.
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“I wasn’t taught.”
Martha Wangari Karua, 2020
Best quote of the year.
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The tweet is back! OK let me be clear with my request. Land Rover Discovery 4. Niende RMA Motors niseme ni wewe utalipa?
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I swear being Kenyan is the root cause of my trust issues.
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Aki I’m really loving Burna Boy’s new stuff but I can’t tell him because I was one of the casualties of The Great Kenyan Blocking of 2017. 😩
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What is happening in Kawangware? This is not right!!!
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Currently in post-endometriosis surgery recovery. I'm sore but relieved. Hopefully this surgery goes some way in alleviating my chronic pain.
#endometriosis
#endowarrior
💛
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My latest story for
@BBCAfrica
, looking at the human stories behind one of the greatest human tragedies of our time.
Anne-Marie met face to face with the man who killed two of her children during the Rwandan genocide 25 years ago - and she forgave him.
This is her story.
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So, according to Jalango, relationships are transactional. And interestingly if women agree to these transactional terms we're still called hoes. We refuse and we're murdered.
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Malik Obama is the personification of the sense of entitlement some Africans have. "You're my successful relative. Give me things!"
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I mean, what happened to Jirongo's first name? If Chebukati just said Cyrus it would have saved us about 3 weeks.
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Also, I NEVER thought I'd say this, but
@MigunaMiguna
is looking more and more like the best candidate for governor.
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Government: Al Shabaab raided a police camp and stole 3 BVR kits.
Me:
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First, Huddah is in Harper's Bazaar. If that's not a big enough deal, she's in the SEPTEMBER issue. That's the most important one of the year!
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Someone told me that they were really disappointed that I didn’t name this boy Kitler.
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Heh. I sweated. But I got it DONE.
So
@CiruMuriuki
made an excellent debut on
#BBCMitikasiLeo
with great reporting in Swahili. Watch the rest of the show here:
@LarryMadowo
@LynaceM
@georgiendirangu
@MayaHayakawa
@zawadimudibo
@Ian_Wafula
@Hudheifaden
@MaggieMutesi
@jasondunford
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But...um.. Dennis Oliech didn't look that bad to me. Sure, he could use a shave. And of course he's aged. That's what time does.
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The thing that actively sends me into a blind rage is the fact that these government officials really want a tech billionaire lifestyle WITH OUR TAXES. Because imagine the shamelessness required to wear a $10,000 pair of shoes and a $30,000 watch in our faces. Imagine being able
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One of the greatest comforts of adulthood was the realization that I'm not the only one that talks to myself.
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Sho Madjozi has just decided to FINISH East Africa by rapping in Kiswahili and I am LIVING.
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Good morning! Who is teaching you to fish this week?
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Felicien Kabuga, who is accused of being one of the main architects of the Genocide against the Tutsi in Rwanda, has been arrested in Paris, France after being on the run for over 2 decades.
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Chebukati is that auntie who prays for food for so long, when she says amen only dusty skeletons remain.
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Ruto: Si sorry basi. I have rejected it.
Gachagua: the problem is we didn’t spy on you effectively.
Heh. I’m going to bed.
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