cassandra
@cassbwell
Followers
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please don’t look this is so embarrassing
Joined April 2012
i just watched a girl get a facetime call from her friend telling her she’s pregnant and she was like squealing “omg yay this is the best news i’m so happy for you” then she hung up and said “that is so fucked up” out loud to no one.
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physically i am on a conference call but mentally i am listening to peace by taylor swift.
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guys on hinge are like “looking for someone who loves random adventures 🤪” and the adventure is just anal.
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this is the best thing that has ever happened on here we can all log off now
im going to rewrite the entire bible but change it to be gayer just to piss straights off.
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i grew up with a disabled single mom on welfare and four siblings and still loved barbies pleeeeease shut up we do not need to have discourse about everything
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I've photoshopped Beyoncé into almost every picture with my ex and I'm no longer bitter about the relationship http://t.co/ejHTiFQAQX.
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watching the devil all the time w a guy and i accidentally said “must be nice” out loud when tom holland was beating someone up.
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i have a stalker and have to block a dozen burner accounts on instagram every single day and this new feature is very helpful !!!!!! @Twitter should do it too
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last NYE my ex wanted to start doing it at 11:55 PM so we could "have sex for two years" and then he came before midnight lol.
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how are you guys celebrating the 10 year anniversary of bruno mars being surprised to see pete wentz
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what’s your toxic relationship anthem mines makedamnsure by taking back sunday.
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the guy who sends me nut vids on snapchat hasn’t wish me a happy women’s day yet what the fuck.
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i met my friend in a mcdonald’s parking lot tonight and we sat in our separate cars next to eachother eating fries and listening to taylor swift and it was the most fun i’ve had in six weeks.
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tom holland if you’re reading this please crush my body under the hood of a car.
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i want taylor swift to release her new recording of love story more than i want to find love.
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i desperately need to stop drinking alcohol but . hear me out . i don’t want to.
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I've got 99 problems and being a decaying organism that's born to die in a society run by money that I can't escape is one of them.
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can someone please buy me the your boyfriend sucks crewneck.
HAPPY BLACK FRIDAY :D new “your boyfriend sucks” crewneck out now and code “soup” yes that’s “soup” gets you 18% OFF!!!.
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overheard from construction workers i just walked by:."no man shes so young. she's wearing a backpack" ."yeah but its like. a nice backpack".
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Sometimes it's appropriate to take a moment of silence and just appreciate how not pregnant we are.
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me: monogamy is a social construct .also me: [to my bf] i hope u and that girl u glanced at last thursday at 3:13pm are very happy together.
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my brother just transferred me money and the security question was his first born child's name and i got it wrong so he cancelled it.
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i can't believe i have to be this person for the rest of my life.
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i don’t wish i were dead anymore. i very much did for about a decade and idk when or how this happened but i just heard someone on tv describe wanting to die and thought “i hope i never feel like that again” so maybe things do get better. idk !!!!!.
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truly the worst thing about this website is everyone’s desire to seem smarter than everyone else by turning something completely innocuous into a social class issue when it… isn’t !.
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I will never deny myself heels for a boy of average height's ego. I'll wear the highest ones I have & pat him on the head like he is my son.
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i look unreasonably beautiful when i am scowling at my boyfriend
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imagine if we all stopped turning our mental illness into content and got actual help.
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i wonder if my upstairs neighbour is going to miss me screaming cruel summer by taylor swift for hours at a time.
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one time my bf said “why do you have so many clothes on the floor” and i said “those are my floor clothes” and he just accepted it and now will pick something up in the other room and be like “should i hang this up or is it floor clothes”.
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dudes rock.
Introducing: Uber Eats Deluxe .
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just donated to planned parenthood $500 that men i don't know paypalled me for nudes i didn't send them. 2017!.
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are straight men good romantic partners? no. but do they make up for it by being good in bed? also no.
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i don’t have a breeding kink i’m just 28 years old and off hormonal birth control for the first time in my adult life.
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a man just said “if you have time to dye your hair you have time to learn about the stock market” to me.
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me irl: u really need to listen to me. because im telling u the truth. i mean this, im ok. trust me. me on twitter: IM NOOOTTTT OOOOOOKKAYYY.
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me in 1998: when i grow up i want to use gps technology to fuck strangers and never develop healthy coping mechanisms
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boy: for real though, what-.me: i mean i have a great plan to do it, a tremendous plan really. i told my son, great guy he is, i told him th.
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not to be a bitch but does anyone want to develop a fulfilling and intimate personal relationship with me.
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a cool thing to do when sleeping with someone new is creep all of their social media posts from the last 3-5 years until they disgust you.
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when u match with someone you've already slept with and forgot about
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if u can't wrap ur neurotypical head around needing a reminder to drink water keep it to ur dam self. this is v good.
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imagine creating a life & nurturing it through its developmental years & it grows up to wonder why there isn't an international men's day.
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i wanted to buy the folklore cardigan but i decided to put one on my skin forever instead
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just finding out people got fit during the pandemic ? why didn’t anyone tell me? i thought we all agreed to gain 30 lbs and completely lose our sense of self.
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hard launching a man on ur instagram story
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if lorelai went to therapy gilmore girls would have been one season long and i would know peace.
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it’s so funny to say this to a 5’10 size 6 brunette with huge tits. like no way dude that’s crazy im so lucky
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*a decaying organism that's born to die in an inescapable capitalist society buys $5 cup of coffee* why can't they ever spell my name right.
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hi here’s a selfie i took today i would like some attention thank you
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just once i want to see a woman on tv go to bed wearing realistic pyjamas - a track and field tshirt from middle school and boxer shorts that belonged to an ex she doesn’t remember.
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my favourite interaction i have ever seen on this godless hellscape
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just overheard a woman telling her 6yo daughter "most men don't do anything, they're all useless" that's some dam good parenting if u ask me.
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stop making people w depression feel guilty for not reaching out to u when it is taking all their might just to Stay Alive.
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looking forward to my mom texting me the breaking news that trump has covid in 16 hours.
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ppl are really still out here making fun of other ppl to feel better about themselves??? it’s 2019 grow up and be openly insecure like the rest of us.
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