court twink the second
@carnistirs
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lecherous knave pondering elves 🔞 main: @caranthirs ✵ pfp by @venusinpearl
he/they ✡︎ 20s
Joined August 2020
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nothing scarier than liking a character who kind of sucks and then running into people who also like them but do not think they suck
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what makes a man desirable to me is being so ashamed of his desires he’s nauseous
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the more desperately you try to keep things from being horny, the hornier they inevitably become. you have gone and created the desperation. the denial and fear of sexuality is in and of itself an eroticism. sorry :/
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twitter is like sure you can see who everyone else’s followers are we don’t care and tumblr is like no sorry you can’t see anyone else’s followers that’s weird and then ao3, the final boss, is like see who other people’s followers are? baby you can’t even see your own
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i just think that if a character is comfortable with killing people they’re probably comfortable putting their penis somewhere that ethically it really should not go
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the real reason the queerbait is hitting you harder than whatever gay coming of age story is currently popular is that slice of life coming of age stories are usually just not as cool as putting two guys in a batshit insane and extreme situation
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consistently fascinating to watch people be fans of a variety of artists whose whole thing is like sickening desires and rot and gore and shit and then somehow be shaken to their core to discover that the artist in question is cool with disturbing themes in fanfiction
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it’s true that there is a post style where you can tell op is very online because the whole thing is very preemptively defensive but this is also true of ao3 author’s notes. there are some notes you read and know op has been through the war to be disclaiming this much
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need a man for whom arousal is inherently tied to shame
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it’s not even yaoi cocaine at this point it is yaoi penicillin. fighting off my numerous infections
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[touches the ao3 author’s note like an old scar] who….who did this to you?
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i love purple prose and i love melodrama. do not communicate anything to me too plainly or reasonably. i want madness and rotting things and grief and love that feels like ingesting rat poison
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i truly think that the stress on the quantity of books you read rather than what books they were and the depth at which you thought about them is a major reason why so many terrible takes come out of book twitter and booktok
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“oh that’s so stupid but this is such an immature way to think it’s probably a teenager. i won’t hold it against them,” i say. i check the profile to discover that op is 25
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it’s kind of funny to imagine elf vampires coexisting with human vampires because human vampires are like “i have been cursed with immortality i will walk the earth undying until the end” and the elf is like damn that’s crazy. i was already like this before the vampirism though
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someone asking too many questions while watching lord of the rings is literally a tolkien fan wet dream if you get mad when your girl asks you to explain lord of the rings you are a poser. send her over here and i will There Was Eru The One Who In Arda Was Called Illuvatar And H
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this account is controlled by right wing polish nationalists who sit on the memorial’s advisory council and attacked a jewish scholar for posting a quote from a survivor that imputed some blame to polish people. this is not its first perversion of the memory of the holocaust
RESOLUTION OF THE INTERNATIONAL AUSCHWITZ COUNCIL ON THE TRAGIC EVENTS IN ISRAEL, APPROVED BY CIRCULATION ON 18 NOVEMBER 2023
The International Auschwitz Council by the Prime Minister of the Republic of Poland acknowledges with the deepest pain and sorrow the suffering of
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simultaneously maddening and hilarious genre of post is people reading some old gothic novel and going “i don’t think this is how it should be. this would be bad if it happened” like no! surely not! not a fucked up situation in the Fucked Up Situations book? for shame
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the idea of mr. darcy as the dominant bad boy never ceases to amaze me because every iteration of darcy gives me the feeling that the first time he saw a boob in person he got so nervous he thought he was going to pass out and left the room immediately
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i’m not holding him accountable for his actions sorry i’m just holding him :/ no yeah my morality is compromised because i love him while knowing he is not a good person and it horrifies me that i am too consumed to turn away. to be fated to love is a violation, yeah. bummer :(
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you don’t know pain until you’ve shipped a pairing where their tag on ao3 is just 90 billion fics about a totally separate pairing where your ship is just vaguely existing in the background mostly off screen also
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extreme patriarchy is inherently incestuous because fathers own daughters and control their sexuality until that ownership and control is passed on to her husband and should the father be dead that control is given to a brother or uncle and that’s partly why asoiaf is Like That
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the thing where fics become so popular they’re like fanons unto themselves is simultaneously magical and frustrating because it’s the power of transformative work and that’s wonderful but also sometimes you feel like people are forgetting that’s not in the source material
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stories about possession where everyone in the vicinity is catholic immediately scare me less because i know they have a guy you can call for that. they have a ritual. there is a game plan for this type of situation it’s probably happened before. not so in rural america
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the weird consistent cycle of this site where people say something mean on a post with a lot of interaction and the original poster responds to them and they then react defensively in a surprised way as though they forgot they were saying that to an actual person who can see it
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sorry my vibes were off for a while there bro i forgot i needed to create things to feel alive
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we all know that most israel supporters truly dgaf about jews but still the fact that they invited the pastor who is known for saying that hitler was sent by god to punish jews for not being zionists and the holocaust was god’s will to the pro-israel march really is a new low
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i think many people’s opinion of whether they’re comfortable with the material in something is about fandom perception of it more than their own feelings and that’s why stuff like this blindsides them because they didn’t look around at what’s in this person’s work for themself
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i love giving characters insane religious trauma not because i have religious trauma or as any real statement about anything i just love it when a man is psychically incapable of having a good time
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so much online foolishness both about fiction and real people is just that people think victimhood and moral virtue are synonymous and so they can’t sort out that being a victim doesn’t make you a good person but you don’t need to be a good person for whatever hurt you to be bad
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@dungeonminister
yes, exactly! and it’s that thing where like. liking a really shitty fictional character doesn’t mean anything about you but if you’re going to stand up and say “actually sometimes [horrible thing character did] is okay and not bad”, now i’m concerned
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there is just something so delicious about a character who is absolutely terrifying being soft-spoken. the contrast between the fact that everyone is listening when this person speaks because it feels like the air has come out of the room with the fact that they speak quietly
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straight guys think about lord of the rings in the funniest ways like they log on and they’re like well if aragorn had faced faramir in a fight who would win who is more powerful like brother first of all faramir would whimper and moan audibly if aragorn so much as slapped him
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am i a monsterfucker? of course i’m a monsterfucker, i love religious lore and erotic encounters with the divine is just monsterfucking held sacred
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vampire who refers to drinking someone’s blood as sucking them off
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ideally the unreliable narrator should recreate the feeling of someone complaining to you or talking shit about a situation and you realize as they go on that they are very much the problem
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fandoms have recognizable patterns to such a degree that sometimes you can tell what’s going on in a fandom like you can tell that a familiar fight is being had despite the fact that you’ve never seen or read the thing they’re fighting about
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there’s a post going around about what books you had to read in high school that you hated but my honest opinion is that you hating something you were forced to read when you were 15 is more often than not the fact that you were 15 than the book
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there is also the inherent incest of patriarchal motherhood where a mother is the only woman a man truly sees as deserving honoring and respecting and a woman sees her son as her great achievement and so there is a closeness with her son she doesn’t even have with her husband
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it is a truth universally acknowledged that you can’t put yaoi that’s too kosher on television without it having an untenably annoying fanbase. if the yaoi is sick and twisted the odds of an annoying fanbase are still 50% but it’s at least less certain
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germany is like yeah our grandparents murdered millions of people from a religious minority who they saw as racially other and we feel bad about that so we’re going to ensure it never happens again by harassing muslims who are, you guessed it, a racialized religious minority
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people will romanticize and fetishize and sexualize and normalize autumn but never think about the real life harm that autumn does. i get cold
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if you write m/f where their very souls are wrapped up in each other to the point that identity and individuality has blurred that inherently does weird things to the characters genders because like you are quite literally the male form of the same being that this woman is
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there is something so sacred about a character whose writer or creator has clearly done everything within their power to make them less fuckable and people keep fucking them anyway
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the canonical basis for this ship is that i would like to see it and it would be hot
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to me, the weird shit is when m/f gets pulled into “why is there a preference for m/m?” discourse because suddenly people are asserting that it’s a signifier of misogyny that women who are attracted to men write about men and women fucking each other
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every post about sexualizing old men inevitably has pictures of a slew of men who are maybe 35 in the qrts. no. this is not for you. this is for our beautiful queens with aarp cards
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immortality is great because you can make the slow burn last so much longer. these mfs have been in an extremely charged friendship for three thousand years. every couple of centuries something happens in a moment of weakness and then they don’t talk about it ever again
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you can’t be hand of the king unless the king fucks you that would just be a terrible waste of an obvious masturbation joke. you’re literally his hand of course he uses you for that
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there are some pairings where the most heinous thing you can do to them is make them love each other. ships where the storyline would not be half as painful and disturbing if there was just hatred or indifference there
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do you ever check twitter while you’re out touching grass and see some weird discourse and think “damn…i don’t give a shit” and go back to touching the grass
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you are NOT that character’s defense lawyer. you have been disbarred for being annoying
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i think it bugs me when people try to make things in a fantasy universe too explicable for the same reason it bugs me when horror explains itself too much. like the ambiguity and the unexplained and the existence of the impossible is what makes this thing tick, don’t fight that
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seeing hotd fans talk about the lack of content between seasons while being in the active fandom for a book that came out when jimmy carter was president feels like being yaoi amish like wym something is out of date in a year i’m still committing sodomy in my horse drawn buggy
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it’s a bitter irony that zionists will label you a self hating jew for being an anti-zionist but zionism has always sought to destroy all jewish culture that does not fit their monolith. i am self-hating but you are the ones who changed your names and banned your own language
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at the end of the day, how characters have sex is a characterization like anything else is and so naturally “he would not fucking say that” can apply to smut just like anything else
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the funniest thing about “sibling coding” is that coding usually exists where, for one reason or another, the author can’t really tell you whatever thing directly so sibling coding would imply a situation where this writer somehow could not get away with just writing siblings
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surely the new york times, the paper that stopped republishing articles from the jewish telegraphic agency in 1937 because it felt that it was too partisan a source on what was happening to jews in europe, would never distort the facts of an ongoing atrocity to its readers
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me seeing a post about how some lady is just so mean and bad to Man and they CANNOT be together posted by someone who appears to ship Man with Guy: [taylor swift voice] i think i’ve seen this film before
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asoiaf fans of all different kinds be like this is my favorite woman character. anyone who dislikes her is a misogynist. also every other woman character is an evil bitch i hate and literally the whore of babylon
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if you replied to this or qrt’d defensively, just know it’s extra true of whoever you’re defending. i’m calling it. i saw goody penis with the devil
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one of the most profoundly attractive things a man can have is traumatic relationship with his own body
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i think a lot of people online use social justice-y language to just say “ethically, no one should ask me to do anything remotely inconvenient or uncomfortable ever for any reason” and every time there are calls for acts of solidarity for anything you see that on full display
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i hang out with blood and guts and damnation fandom so much that running into normie fandom is a jump scare. i just saw people scandalized by monster romance when the monsters in question were they guys from good omens. [dorothy voice] i’m frightened, aunt em, i’m frightened
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“do candles pity moths?” and “for one year, one day of the flame i would have given all: kin, youth, and hope itself” are both insane lines like i don’t care what the narrator says i know the hair on the back of finrod’s neck stood up when andreth said that
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me: i think it’s hot when men are sexually repressed
this person: you are a rapist or predator probably
@carnistirs
Iunno the whole being attracted too his shame of his desire gives me rapist/predator vibes sorry
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nothing has ever been less of a serious issue than this but if you ask me the reason so many of the “would this character watch barbie or oppenheimer?” things in the last few weeks have been wrong is because people were just answering whether the character is masc or fem
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so many people who talk about wanting to tear a man to shreds and make him cry (erotic) express horniness for women like I Would Kneel At Her Feet And Worship and my truth is not all of you can actually have such wildly varying preferences based on gender. some of you are lying
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it never stops being funny to see very modern words used to talk about hotd characters like did aegon the conqueror take accountability for toxically gaslighting the people into accepting him as king while ignoring their boundaries and causing trauma responses in his nepo babies
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“[character] is completely normal and uninteresting and relatable, but [really cool love interest] is wildly obsessed with them” is a lot better if you lean into the comedy of the love interest being unhinged and insane about Literally Some Person
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some clips from the nun came up on my tiktok feed and it’s like the demon nun is scary looking for sure but i am significantly less scared in this situation because i know this must be precedented. they’re gonna have a relic for this or something
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the way book twitters talk is like if you ran into someone whose whole platform was being a film buff but they mostly just post about the numbers of movies they’ve seen lately and then the graphic they made that lists those movies tells you they’re all mcu
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one wild thing about tiktok having so many normie people on there is occasionally you see random offline adults run into extremely online sexual conservatism like a 45 year old father absolutely BAFFLED because he’s being accused of objectifying his wife because he said she’s hot
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my burden to bear in this life is that i am always shipping men together in a forbidden homosocial desires way and not in the happy marriage way
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there’s nothing wrong with liking mainstream pop culture but people have a hilarious way of talking like they’re oppressed for it like you’d think they go to the theatre to watch a rerun of avengers 2 and an assailant forces them to watch 1920s german expressionist film instead
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i just saw a tiktok where someone was saying she only listens to audiobooks narrated by humans and it didn’t initially register that that meant no ai so for a second i lived in a world where a) aliens were real, b) they narrate audiobooks, and c) this lady had a problem with that
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if you ask me the way some fandom types treat anal sex like an extreme sport where everyone involved could die or something and the fact that cishet sexual culture tends to view anal as something men want but women don’t ever want because it’s bad are not unconnected things
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i don’t know why but it actually deeply disturbs me that the length of time between aegon’s conquest and the events of game of thrones is like only 300 years. that’s not nearly ancient enough
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it feels like “things that are convenentionally feminine are disproportionately hated or not taken seriously because of misogyny” (which is true) has become skewed in a bizarre way where you see many women on here who now think gender conformity is necessarily feminist
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for the most part i think the pressure on authors to be public social media figures is really bad but it is funny that sometimes now you can get warned away from ever reading an author’s work just because they have annoying opinions online
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not commenting on a fic written for you in an exchange is go directly to jail do not pass go do not collect $200 but not even kudo’ing fic written for you in an exchange? that’s go directly to hell
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forbidden love is the gateway trope to all manner of sexy problematic ships because you get far enough into “people want to keep them apart for arbitrary reasons! the world wouldn’t approve!” and eventually you’re like “what if people wouldn’t approve for good reasons 😳”
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if you’re in your mid 20s and you have any weird feelings about the fact that you’re getting older all you have to do is hang out with people in their 30s who are cool and then you’re like is this what you’re concerned about? becoming cool like this in your 30s? be serious
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if a fanon is the only way you want to imagine something that’s totally fine i just think of the number of times in various fandoms i’ve seen people treat others like they weren’t understanding the source correctly for not adopting something that…isn’t in the source. at all
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people angrily agreeing with you is sometimes more jarring than a hate qrt like you’ll say something like “green is not my favorite color” and someone will qrt you with “so true. people who like green are barely even human and a man in green fucked my husband” like WOAH woah woah
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any time people try to bully or guilt others into liking a pairing i just take that for a sign the pairing must be ass because if it was good you wouldn’t be resorting to this to get people into it
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there is no reason you can’t create an extreme matriarchy in your fantasy universe but unless it’s going to be clear that this is a social system that’s inherently gonna involve abuse and exploitation just the same as an extreme patriarchy does, i know you are very dumb
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watching people hornypost on tiktok where they have to censor every word is so goddamn funny like what can you do when you see someone type something like “i need his 🐓 in my azz or m0uth or i will expl*de and un4live” except laugh
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it doesn’t matter whether i like the celebrity in question or not, the moment i see someone analyzing a famous person’s expressions and body language to the minutiae and thinking they can read their mind as a result i immediately think op is a clown and full of shit
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i mean fuck ai but you have to admit “god isn’t answering so we made a machine to pretend to be him that talks back to us but the machine lacks the ability to create so it just repeats garbled versions of our own voices to us” is a raw dystopian concept
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lrt it kind of sends me that people whine about wanting more discreet romance novel cover art now when cover art for mainstream traditionally published romance novels is so tame at this point whereas older cover art was always balls to the wall horny
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people will look you dead in the eyes and say george rr martin was just including all that incest and sexual violence out of a purely altruistic desire for realism which is a fascinating level of delusional
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i think werewolf fiction remains popular less because it continues to represent relevant societal fears and more because it continues to represent a relevant desire to fuck a wolf man but what do i know
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sometimes i read posts that frame queerness like it’s a dichotomy between “queer people” and “cis men” and i’m like. do you think there aren’t cis men who are queer or
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characters caring for each other’s injuries is great but a critical part of it is that it hurts. that they’re resetting a bone or stitching up a wound or doing something that is painful. it doesn’t hit the same without that
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there are many reasons to have a trans headcanon. a very important one of them is spite
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i find that there is this tension where people complain about fantasy mythological chosen one kingship and say they want realistic politics but they also want beloved protagonists to be both good at being kings and queens and good people and don’t like that that’s contradictory
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