el the biblically accurate van kin
@callav4n
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warning: will mix pop culture metaphors when upset || talk to me about byler, taivan, tanthamore, wolfstar and pjazel || bottoms (ruby & ayo’s version)
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a thread of hazel’s shirts because i successfully bagged the shirt she got beaten up in and now i’m desperately looking for other pieces 😭
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people on tiktok cared more about a generic looking white man named jeff than the black butch lesbian lead who’s arc formed pretty much the entire emotional core of the film and who was some of the most enjoyable and relatable examples of poc lesbian rep i’ve ever seen in film.
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cornplating but sometimes i think about how van palmer just walked around the cabin in a shirt and her boxers… she’s so relatable i do this regularly tbh
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@ungodlywests
i’m confused is this about harry styles? i didn’t watch the grammys the only thing i know is mother viola’s win 🤭
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@haworthes
the lack of respect is INSANEEEE. imagine losing your son and your husband and you go online to find every single comment on the situation is just “zendaya the only thing imma watch for now fr 🤣🤣🤣” that’s SO horrible i hope his family are looking after themselves right now
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ruby cruz not being credited anywhere on the official bottoms poster and even being left out of the fine print despite hazel having tritagonist status and being the character with the biggest amount of in-universe canon lore will never make any sense to me
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since everyone really liked my hazel one, here is a thread of josie’s shirts!
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her t-shirt from the lunch hall scene is the “she/her with barcode print and lettering” shirt from vetements
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IM CRYINGGG ITS LITERALLY BRO LIKE
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he looks like he’d clap his hands together excitedly if you gave him chocolate milk
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butch lesbian told me he was autistic i said oh im sure
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i want this silly little autistic butch girltwink in a way that would terrify god and cause the earth to explode actually like it’s genuinely SO bad for me
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you know, acolyte isn't even my job? it's not lesbian either which is a common misconception. see actually, my job is just… butch.
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what if i said laura lee had a thing for van. van being her gay awakening, lottie being her first love, van and lottie having their weird little acolyte codependency as a result of laura lee’s influence on lottie what if-
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@originalgoth
@VanistheOGlhb
okay but them all having fun at the seance later that episode and javi coming up and asking “are we all going to die out here” was so “do you guys ever think about dying” coded
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@mileven4endgame
pov i’m a mileven in these comments seeing a byler page: OMG EW GAY PEOPLE SCARYYYY I WANT THESE CHILDREN TO HAVE A SEX SCENE TO PROVE MY HETEROSEXUAL SHIP BECAUSE THE IDEA OF TWO BOYS LOVING EACHOTHER TERRIFIES ME FOR SOME REASON AAAAHHHHHHH
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tag urself guys, think i fall somewhere between tai and pj tbh
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everyone already knows…
when you say "white girl save me" what white girl are you talking about
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@dykesinmedia
i mean. she’s hot asf i’m not surprised she was pulling the popular girls. of COURSE they’re gonna wanna help the poor lil guy 😭
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@gabrimoonn
A&W because everyone loves the “jimmy jimmy cocoa puff” beat drop but we’re sleeping on the “if I told you that I was r*ped do you really think that anybody would think I didn't ask for it/ I didn't ask for it/ I won't testify/ I already fucked up my story”
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@elumaxism
lucas = homophobic and max = outs mike is the WORST trope when realistically they’re both bisexual and would support tf out of mike struggling to come to terms with his sexuality
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"van palmer is so nonbinary genderfucker" i say into the mic. the crowd boos. i begin to walk off in shame when a voice speaks & commands silence from the room. "thayr roiht!" they say. i look for the owner of the voice & there in the 3rd row stands australian actor, liv hewson.
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everyone’s talking about mistynat but someone draw this as taivan because it’s giving this energy
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mlm ships: b-but we’re both boys
wlw ships: i wanna go back to new york, tai. i wanna go to new york with you and i wanna buy you a fucking pretzel and i wanna take you on a fucking horse and carriage ride through central park. i know i don’t have to come with you. i need to.
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@petulant_kit
i think PJ, like many people who aren’t that popular, likes knowing that she’s at least not *as* bad as someone else. yes, she’s a loser, but she deems herself significantly better than hazel and a little better than josie hence her “you’re MY sidekick” line 1)
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@vanderrwaals
the thing about pj is that the hate feels kinda misogynistic? think about it, she’s literally just greg heffley or jonah hill in superbad as a woman. neither of those characters are despised for being shitty people they’re just funny characters but people wanna cancel the woman🤔
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her pep rally fight scene button up (which i now have 🤭) is once again urban outfitters standard cloth and is the “ecru button up polo”
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imagine if the first adult taivan sex scene is done the way that shauna killing adam/nat laying on lottie’s lap was? the IMPACT of cutting between teen/adult, showing how they’re always connected & always need eachother, how right & necessary this still is after all this time…
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yellowjackets 💀💀💀
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I love when there's physical chemistry but it would be a bad idea to act on it so whenever you're around each other you both diplomatically pretend there isn't this ancient animal awareness between your bodies
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remember when milevens were saying they hope will dies of aids so he wouldn’t “homewreck” their ship when season 4 first came out? that was a fucking CRAZY reaction to a teenage boy having a crush on his friend.
the homophobia in the m!leven fandom is actually insane... y'all come here and say the most scary and horrifying shit about a queer character and act like it's fine???? stop acting like mf victims when bylers and will stans call y'all out
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her striped shirt from the bleachers lunch scene/first day of school is the visalia “secret path button up” shirt
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josie and hazel baby butch besties idec like they’re my bottoms vanat actually
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these photos being insanely attractive to me says a lot i think idk what it’s saying exactly but it’s definitely a lot
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@haworthes
it’s literally got a black lesbian as the fronting tritagonist of the movie? what they mean anti black 💀💀💀
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taissa turner showing up at van palmer’s door after 25 years and then cheating on her wife with her
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@vantaissas
it’s funny that they’re so underrated considering an interracial queer relationship between a black girl and a butch lesbian (who, might i add, also defies hollywood’s terribly stereotypical depiction of butch lesbians) is something i don’t think i have EVER seen on screen before
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her red shirt from the fight club training montage is the wales bonner “printed bowling shirt”
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@vansfacee
also, taissa begging her to take it off and let her see all of her, even the “bad” parts and then looking directly at what van considers ugly about herself and calling her beautiful is so important when understanding taissa’s love for van
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women are just better though so like…
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@ElizaNonArtz
so the only type of lesbian relationship you want to see portrayed on screen is between two conventionally attractive, skinny, femme bisexual women with overly westernised features? interesting… sounding like an all sorts of fucked up take to me but whatever.
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her shirt from the share circle scene is the “orange bowling shirt” also from urban outfitters’ standard cloth range
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@dangerouslysabs
@melvsolar
i was obsessed with her in this era, this and thumbs went so hard
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and this button up from the fight club training montage was the “kiss shirt with short sleeves” from all saints
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pj telling josie she has a crush on hazel:
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new tanthamore au just dropped guys!!!! i’m calling it *checks notes* “i promise that i’m not a terrorist, i was just trying to get my point across”
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her button up from the final fight scene is the standard cloth urban outfits “photo real floral” shirt
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@jackiexshipman
van and tai are literally the ONLY biblically accurate ones… why did she work so hard on hallucinating taivan? why is she so obsessed with them, the only out gays? why is she subconsciously focussed on queerness? why does she want to kiss the blonde girls? in this essay i will-
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UPDATE TO THREAD: found the source of one of my absolute favourite pieces, hazel’s patterned v-neck from the car wash scene is the “printed knitted vest” from Y.A.S
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and if i said it’s better because porn is gross and fetishises lesbianism for straight men whereas ruby cruz and emma seligman are for the girls and the gays only then what?
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they knew what they were doing.
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people saying hazel is vegan or vegetarian when one of the first things we learn about her is that she volunteered at a meat farm is the stupidest thing i’ve ever heard like
My headcanon is that Hazel is a vegetarian who makes silly notes about vegetarian products and stuff, and then emails them to her vegetarian/vegan friends (which she made online by the way)
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@moontosaturn13
@Taylor_144
never not looking judgemental asf when sat together in this position
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anytime i feel suicidal i imagine ayo edebiri showing up and being like “WOAH uhhh you’re uhhh standing… a lil bit close to the edge ahahaha HOPE I DONT HAVE TO CALL THE POLICE!!! haaa just kidding no i’m not kidding please uhm please don’t kill yourself” while doing finger guns
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this jacket being stained with van’s blood… between this and the confession scene, tai is ALWAYS wearing van’s blood, it’s something she carries with her. it’s a choice and it’s not, it’s love and it’s trauma, it’s something she can’t ever avoid because they’re bound together.
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someone tell me to manage my time better because autistic hazel genuinely feels more important than all the overdue assignments sat in my inbox 🫶🏽
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i love that this headcanon is just like a rite of passage now for any butch lesbian. like we as a society really just look at every loser masc and go “woaaahhh the spiderman potential is so strong” and as a spiderman obsessed loser masc i adore that actually
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@jadetanthalos
literally the only one of these where both teams have an equal chance is when people start saying bottoms girls vs. the yellowjackets tbh
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ruby cruz/liv hewson lesbians when their faves have zero internet presence and a super small discography but they’re the only thing keeping them sane 😀
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@grvceryder
tai’s facial expressions always make me giggle even in the most dire situations i’m sorry i love the shit jasmin does with her face💀
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can we get her as a lesbian vampire please woah
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@vansfacee
liv is one of the most insanely talented actors in the cast like they literally acted their way to main characters/season regular status but nobody talks about them tbh
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@rinasimme
i have no idea what show/film this was intended to be in reference to but i agree we need more representation for that because honestly that’s the majority of queer women i know
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@themployed
imagine being in protective girlfriend mode when you aren’t even cuffed? PLS she’s so embarrassing i love her so much 💀
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my babies
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@headovrhls
they all yell “MIKE?!?!?” but el yells “FINALLY” and they’re all like huh? and she’s like dude i’ve had to spend the past three months watching them sneak around and pretending like i don’t see them kissing and holding hands every two seconds. this is a big relief for me.
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@lostinyosemite
blue banisters legit one of my fave albums ever it’s SSSSSOOOOOOOOO good istg
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it’s givingg “i’m josie, by the way. gooood eveningggg” and “wotz uhp ladz!!!” but also like you can’t convince me this wouldn’t work on isabel and pj respectively PLEASE
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i was about to say something else but sure i guess mother works, yeah…
she’s suffering from cant stop being mother disease
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being a lesbian is so fucking stupid because why am i screaming crying throwing up over this blurry ass footage? “MY FAVES ARE TOGETHER” girllll get a grip 😭😭😭
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ruby cruz gets a script, reads the word “pining” and yells sign me up, she’s like finn wolfhard for dykes i’m telling you
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this has to be the fucking funniest liv hewson clip i’ve ever heard because- 💀💀💀
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@fruityracc
van by tai’s side and misty by nat’s is interesting when you consider who it is that always has the other’s back. both van and misty have served as their knight, their protector even - perhaps especially - when their form of help has been unwanted to some extent… interesting.
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every time i see this shoot i realise i am no better than a man
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@cherylsbians
i saw it as paralleling shauna and jackie. they both ate those they loved the most raw and i think that is LITERAL “raw” emotion…
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@petulant_kit
we know from her fashion sense that she’s actually a very insecure person and so i think it’s a shitty way of making her feel big about herself. ultimately she is greg heffley, josie is her rowley and she’s stuck hazel in the fregley box to poke fun at her strangeness 2)
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van palmer when she fancies a savoury option instead of two bites of that one stale doughnut
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them asf
Exes to lovers is actually the most painful trope because you have to go through all the angst TWICE: the first time around, when you find out why the broke up, and the second time after they reunite and mess it all up again
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EXACTLY like. mike is flawed but it doesn’t make him unlovable. and neither do any of the other character’s flaws. if they were all perfect it would be boring because nobody is like that in real life
mike was in the wrong for fighting with lucas in s1. he was in the wrong for how he treated max in s2. he was in the wrong for how he treated dustin, will, max, and el in s3. he was in the wrong for how he treated lucas, will, and el in s4. stop trying to flip the narrative.
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