Caitlin Canahai
@caitlincanahey
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Trademark Lawyer. Ask me about my current hyperfixation. Canisius ‘14. NDLS ‘19. She/Her 🏳️🌈
Joined June 2009
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Not to expose myself for being dumb—but the vet told me my dog had a spot that might be a melanoma and the first words out of my mouth were “oh that does run in our family.” Like, I really forgot for a sec that I did not give birth to her.
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1) I got to meet
@PeteButtigieg
and
@Chas10Buttigieg
tonight which was beyond incredible.
2) I learned that Chasten pronounces GIF like “jif,” confirming that he really is perfect.
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Something they don’t tell you about being a lawyer is that you will spend a comical amount of time on using the date calculator to figure out deadlines and repeatedly questioning your own ability to count or even know what month it is.
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Are you really even a lawyer if the sound of an Outlook notification doesn’t trigger your fight or flight response?
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Was listening to a true crime podcast and the host joked that maybe, for lawyers, “torts are true crime.” And I would 100% listen to a podcast that recapped famous tort cases in the style of true crime.
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Prof: "Most litigators are addicted to what?"
Student, confidently: "Cocaine"
Prof, after a moment of stunned silence: "Adrenaline..."
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Realized it’s been almost 6 months since I left Big Law for a small firm. Since switching jobs, I have not once cried from work stress. 🤗🤗🤗
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Me: idk why I’m still single
Also, me: giving dating app matches who are simply trying to flirt with me lectures on trademark law
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One time our pdf software wasn’t working and a partner asked me to compare 2 docs. I told him I couldn’t, because the software was down. He just looked at me confused and said, “No, like, use your eyes.”
I think about this interaction at least once a week.
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Can’t get over this “copyright” notice that was included in a real book. Some poor Reddit user had to ask if it was a real thing.
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A few months ago, a professor at my law school asked me why I “did nothing” with my law degree—referring to the fact that didn’t do a federal clerkship after I graduated—and honestly, I’m still annoyed about it.
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How my timesheet is going to look today:
Non-billable Admin - 8.0: Review and analysis of Midnights by T. Swift; conduct research regarding same.
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I got a new haircut and I FaceTimed my grandparents to show them:
Grandpa: “You must be one of the prettiest lawyers at your new firm”
Grandma: “One of the prettiest lawyers in the whole world!”
Grandpa: “Well, I don’t know about that.”
So important to stay humble.
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“So, it’s actually Steamboat Willie that’s entering the public domain, not Mickey Mouse. The distinction is important. And we have to discuss the trademark angle because…”
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So my actual Admin Law outline is garbage but my memes are 🔥🔥🔥
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Was at a restaurant and our waitress told us that a certain item on the menu was “trademarked.” So naturally, I whipped out my phone to get on TESS. And I’m starting to understand why I don’t have many friends…
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Someone emailed me about a panel he was organizing on trademark law. I responded saying I’d love to attend and asked where to register. He then clarified that he was asking me to be one of the speakers on the panel. This moment was brought to you by imposter syndrome.
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Hello trademark friends—my new favorite infringement hypothetical just dropped
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Being a TM attorney involves an unexpected but enjoyable amount of investigative work. Like, you filed a TM app that resembles my client’s mark and now I’m looking at your house on Zillow and reading your wedding website trying to figure out what kind of business you run.
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For context, I used my law degree to become a lawyer, which I think is kind of the point of a law degree. And, I’m a queer woman who went to Notre Dame—a school that gets good clerkship numbers because they appeal to conservative judges.
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In law school, students don’t say “I love you” we say “I haven’t started outlining yet either.” And I think that’s really beautiful.
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I just heard a law student use the phrase Big Dicta Energy to describe a SCOTUS opinion and I can’t decide if it’s the worst thing I’ve ever heard or the best.
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Lots of real, fancy lawyers on my TL have done this, so here’s my contribution: if you’re a law student looking to network—I’m a queer, first-gen lawyer in Chicago, and I’m happy to talk to you about anything. I specialize in IP, but I used to work in bankruptcy.
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How it feels to be a baby trademark lawyer drafting my first C&D letter.
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Discovered that my 3-year-old niece refers to all cereal as “Cheerios” and, now I want to conduct a bunch of trademark surveys using only toddlers just to see what kind chaos it would create.
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I’m currently trying to mediate a power struggle between a company’s board of directors and its members, which sounds very exciting and Succession-esque—except that the underlying dispute is about switching the office from Coke products to Pepsi.
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“Imagine just walking down the street when, seemingly out of no where, a barrel falls from the sky and lands on your head. Was it simple negligence? Or something more sinister? Find out on ‘Res Ipsa Loquitur’, brought to you by Hello Fresh.”
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“Lady Palsgraff had a smile that lit up a room. She had no idea that on one fateful day at a Long Island train station, an explosive package would change her life—and our legal system—forever.”
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Can’t wait to reach the phase of my legal career where I’m not asked if I’m a paralegal or a summer associate. 🙃
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In law school, I dressed up as Alice—complete with all the software patents that I killed.
IP Twitter, which case would you dress up as?
I would hunt down the perfect green-gold outfit and dress up as qualitex v Jacobson products. :)
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Note to law students: I’m not saying trademark law is the coolest practice area, but you’ll probably never get the chance to trace the origin of the phrase “deez nuts” through rap songs if you become a tax lawyer. Just food for thought…
Dee’s Nuts also attached the response to the cease and desist letter they got from Mr. Beast and I know the lawyer who drafted this break down of the meaning of “deez nuts” had a lot of fun.
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Life update: So excited to say that today is my last day as a bankruptcy lawyer. Come Monday, I’m officially joining the trademark team at Faegre Drinker! My heart is happy right now 😊
#TrademarkTwitter
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Feel like we need to start an IP version of the current trend, so I’ll start:
He’s a ten, but he uses the phrase “soft IP”
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Officially a JD*!!!!!
*My tweets should still not be considered legal advice.
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Was attempting to flirt with someone and she asked me what my friendship bracelets meant. I was wearing my RIP TESS and TTAB bracelets. Imagine this woman’s immense confusion when the words “Patent and Trademark Office” came out of my mouth
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Being a trademark lawyer is kind of ridiculous sometimes because I’m currently grabbing screenshots from a DJ Khaled music video to prove that my client’s products are popular. Like, I went to law school for this.
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I love the seemingly infinite nature of trademarks. I’m currently prosecuting a trademark application that has a first use date in 1757. My previous record was 1877.
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I’m seated next to a toddler on my flight back to Chicago, and I’ve realized this is how I’m meant to socialize. We’re discussing Anna and Elsa and the relative merits of noodles with butter versus grilled cheese. It’s perfect.
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I went to McDonald’s to treat myself to a Diet Coke, and there was a large group of people having a literal business meeting at the McDonald’s Play Place. And from now on, I will be requesting that all firm lunches take place at a McDonald’s Play Place.
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Patent prosecutor, trademark prosecutor, IP litigator
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One of my most terrifying/hilarious moments as a baby lawyer was getting a call from the head of my practice group and hearing him say “[The plaintiff] produced one of your tweets.” 😵💫😵💫😵💫
One day I’m going to walk into court and opposing counsel is going reference one of my dumb tweets and I’m going to laugh harder than I’ve ever laughed before
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I have a copyright joke but
I have a trademark joke but you probably heard it before—it’s generic
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Look out Chicago, there’s a new lawyer in town ⚖️🙋🏻♀️⚖️
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Trademark priority in law school hypos: Company A first made use in May 2014. Company B first used June 2013.
Priority disputes in real life: We spent hours reviewing all the docs we have and still have no idea when either company started using the mark, but we made a timeline:
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Overheard at a craft brewery:
Guy: “I’ll have the Spongebob IPA”
Bartender: “It’s actually Sponge Bomb for trademark reasons.”
Me, to myself after noticing that the label features a square sponge character and a pineapple:
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I want to play! A workaholic TM lawyer and a carefree examining attorney fall in love while arguing about whether a proposed mark is merely ornamental. It ends with him proposing in an examiner’s amendment (à la
@brianlfrye
). It’s called: The Primary Significance of Christmas.
Working with Hallmark movies on in the background and they’re really missing out on the
#appellatetwitter
and
#lawtwitter
audience. Here’s some suggestions: /1
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They don’t tell you this in law school, but 90% of being a good first-year associate is figuring out which documents to copy and paste from.
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Oh to be a tiny piglet eating a large head of lettuce while balancing on a watermelon
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Feeling shocked and sad. My own father just called me, a trademark lawyer, and said “I came up with a great business idea. First, I need you to help me copyright a phrase so that I own it.”
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A wholesome story about trademarks. Mom is definitely not the asshole.
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Fun game: Try to spot all the IP issues in this photograph.
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If you laughed at this ad as a teenager, you’re an IP lawyer now. Sorry I don’t make the rules.
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“We filed the application ourselves.”
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“Trademark it”
What phrase signals that the person using it doesn't understand your field?
Example: "Computer error."
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1) This partner is my absolute favorite person in my group. 2) I will only be accepting feedback in this format from now on.
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“You can’t ‘trademark’ a word. You can *register* a word as a trademark. But trademark rights arise from use, not registration.”
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What happens when you work for a trademark prof and write a note about trade dress
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Coworker: I love your sweater. It’s cool that it’s designed to look like it’s inside out.
Me: Oh, thank you so much.
Narrator: Sadly, Caitlin would later realize that she had, in fact, put her sweater on inside out that morning. She is not stylish, just a dumbass.
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Trademark lawyers be like “I know a spot” and then try to take you to TESS but it’s down
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I saw a rich, well-dressed older woman at the liquor store and thought to myself “major Moira Rose vibes.” We left at the same time, and this was her car?!?!?!
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I was thinking about brand mascots and naturally ended up on TESS. So, I thought others might enjoy—
How you’re used to seeing your favorite mascots versus how they look in their trademark registrations 🧵
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Imagine going to law school and passing the bar—all so you could one day prosecute a trademark application for a logo of two manatees 69ing
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Friend once told me she got a “letter” from a law firm. She sends scans, and I realize it’s actually a summons and complaint. I explain she’s being sued and she insists that’s impossible because the process server didn’t say “You’ve been served,” like in the movies.
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Decided to re-do my Alice costume and I’m the only lawyer that’s dressed up.🙃 But a partner did stop by my office to discuss patent-eligible subject matter, so I guess it’s fine.
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Went to a party with college friends last night. I was halfway through describing the Monkey Selfie case when I came to the sad realization that I'm no longer fun at parties that don't involve law students/lawyers.
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I know my non-lawyer parents don’t totally understand what I do as a trademark attorney, but they always know what I mean when I say I had to send a cease and desist.
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There were two (?!?!?!) essay questions about the rule against perpetuities on the bar exam this year. And that’s great evidence that the bar has nothing to do with “minimum competency” or the actual practice of law.
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Get in losers, a new trademark complaint just dropped.
New fight over Dees(z) Nuts(z).
On Friday, Dee’s Nuts filed a complaint and moved for a preliminary injunction against Mr. Beast’s company Feastables over their use of “Deez Nuts.”
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Was feeling kind of meh about the Olympics, but NBC brought back Steve Kornacki and his maps!!!! 😍😍😍
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My wife & I never talk baby talk to our kids. We read McCarthy on Trademarks to them every night.
Adults are always shocked that my 3-year-old knows all the DuPont Factors and can already explain the problems with the inconsistent application of the functionality doctrine
My wife and I never baby talk to our kids. We use full sentences and a wide vocabulary including complex words.
My son is 3 and can carry a full conversation. Adults at family gatherings are shocked at his social aptitude. My daughter isn’t even 2 and she uses 4-syllable words.
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@smmarotta
Why is it that my proofreading abilities suddenly become 100x better once a document is sent/submitted?
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That trademark lawyer feel when you google a client’s proposed mark and a whole lot of weird porn shows up.
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Me, a TM lawyer, watching the Barbie episode of The Toys That Made Us and learning that the inspiration for Barbie was a German prostitute doll—knowing that Mattel argued Aqua’s Barbie Girl diluted their TM by turning Barbie into a sex object.
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Opened my reminders app today—which I rarely ever use—and discovered this old to-do list that basically sums up my law school experience.
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We have a client and their in-house counsel abbreviates “interrogatories” to “rogs” and something about that is so adorable. Drafting interrogatories? Boring and tedious. Drafting ‘rogs? Fun and interesting!
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Just thinking about the time a client asked us to send a C&D because someone was stealing their content. Used the Wayback Machine and realized the infringer’s posts predated the client’s. Asked the client about it and they were just like “oh, maybe I did borrow from them.” ☠️☠️☠️
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Me, a trademark lawyer, discovering that Alison Roman’s cooking newsletter is branded under the name “A NEWSLETTER”
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Random trademark-related fact of the day: Michelin tires and the Michelin star guide for restaurants are made by the same company. And they actually started the restaurant guide as a way to get people to buy more tires.
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Had some copyright cookies made to celebrate the end of our copyright class/reward people for finishing the exam!! ©️©️©️
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New boss saw me reading a law review article and asked what matter it was for. I said I was just reading it “for fun” and now I’m pretty sure the whole office thinks I’m weird 😬😬😬
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Currently in a groupchat of IP attorneys, and we’re discussing the intricacies behind the differing names of Girl Scout cookies in various geographic markets. And now I’m seriously considering updating my research agenda.
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I know there’s a lot going on in House of Gucci (Lady Gaga, tax evasion, cheating, murder, Adam Driver’s excessive smiling, whatever Jared Leto was doing, the accents, etc.)
But I really wish they spent more time on the counterfeit and copyright infringement subplots.
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I guess Chick-fil-a is MSCHF’s latest target. Their latest drop: delivering genuine Chick-fil-a sandwiches on a Sunday for $6.66. I’m sure Chick-fil-a will take this well…
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Today, on trademark hypos in the wild: I overheard two people at Sephora discussing whether Sunday Riley’s new Pink Drink serum is related to Starbuck’s well-known Pink Drink.
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It's the day before my Admin Law final, so of course I'm just making more memes.
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Twitter fam, please send good vibes. I’m in the process of adopting this sweet dog named Star. She has a little bump on her nose and just needs to get cleared medically before I can officially adopt her. Hoping for good news from the vet. 🥺
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Told a colleague I had “big plans” tonight, and then had to come up with a work-appropriate way to explain that I meant drinking wine alone while reminiscing about One Direction’s tenth anniversary before being emotionally destroyed by the new Taylor Swift album.
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Me @ RBG when she says the likelihood of confusion factors and fair use will be enough to ward off the anticompetitive effects of ’s trademark registration
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Trademark friends, can we make friendship bracelets a thing™ in our community because it was fun to make these and I will totally bring them to INTA to trade. (Also, is the TESS one too morbid?)
#TrademarkTwitter
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The trademark lawyer urge to ask the vendors at the Christmas Market selling their own Bills merch if they have the proper licenses
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I love Swifites for aggressively keeping track of Taylor’s USPTO filings. She’s inspiring a new generation trademark lawyers.
‼️| Trademarks of Taylor Swift TV & 1989 TV have been approved.
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My Hinge profile continues to elicit some hot takes on IP law
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Canadian educator/activist, Luna Matatas, is accusing Cara Delevingne of infringing her trademark “Peg the Patriarchy” with her Met Gala outfit. Made the mistake of looking up her Canadian registration on my work computer, so hopefully my new boss is chill.
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