My current approach to COVID is that I don't want to be the guy in the war novel that gets shot right after the armistice is signed. Just need to hang in a little longer.
ME, AS A LAWYER: "It's really important that you read and understand these documents before signing."
ME, AS A HOME BUYER: "Just keep handing the papers across. I'll sign anywhere."
They never tell you in law school how much of your time as a practicing lawyer is spent figuring out why Word is adding an extra, blank page to your document.
1/ Jury selection begins today in the case of leader Stewart Rhodes & 4 members of the Oath Keepers group, indicted on charges, the most serious is which is seditious conspiracy. The trial could have serious implications for Trump. Rhodes is a Yale-educated lawyer.
ME, AS A FIRST-YEAR ASSOCIATE: "I am so terribly sorry that I sent that last email without the document attached. I just realized after hitting 'send.' I will be certain to be more careful in the future."
ME, NOW: "And this time with the document actually attached."
If you come from a family where presents are distributed and opened one at a time, going to a family where everyone finds and opens their own simultaneously is utter barbarism.
Somewhere, there's a second-year associate who is going to start litigating Suez Canal claims now and make partner litigating them and that will pretty much be her entire career. She will be the Suez Canal claims person.
One think they don't teach you about in law school is how a case can get held up because only Terri in the clerk's office handles a certain thing and she's USUALLY in on Fridays but not today so maybe try back next week.
DLAPiper partner
@DouglasEmhoff
, husband of Vice President-elect Kamala Harris, will leave the law firm before President-elect Joe Biden and Harris are sworn in on Jan. 20, a campaign spokeswoman tells
@BLaw
.
@ChrisOpfer
has the story.
As you look at these rows of former clerks waiting to receive RBG's caskets, realize they are all tremendously accomplished attorneys, many with families, some that had to hop a plane in a pandemic, and all dropped their lives to come do this. It's always a powerful sight.
I try not to think about how much of the legal ecosytem relies on that Cornell site and the "Date Calculator" websites to work correctly and what would happen if they didn't.
Breaking: Judge hearing Trump's challenge to the Aug. 8 Mar-a-Lago search asks the legal team to actually do legal work and provide her with explanations of why the court has jurisdiction, what Trump actually wants, what effect this has on the ongoing warrant matter, and more.
Lawyers who write about how "in the pandemic, lawyers just need to be resilient and innovative" should be required to disclose (1) whether they have kids, (2) what ages, (3) whether their partner works outside the home, (4) whether they have a nanny or other childcare help.
Judge Silberman's email to all Article III judges raises an important question:
Who in their right mind at the Administrative Office of the Courts thought an all-Article-III-judges mailing list that any judge can send to was a good idea?
ADMISSION TO U.S. COURT OF APPEALS:
"Sign this paper and send us a check."
ADMISSION TO U.S. DISTRICT COURT:
"First. you must journey to our courthouse on the third day of the second month under the waxing gibbons. Then. you must answer questions three. And give us a check."
I got a hotel room for tonight so I can get a good night's sleep away from the little ones.
3YO, upon being told I was not going to be home tonight, told my wife that he'd stay up and wait for me.
My heart.
WHAT YOU THINK ADVERSE POSSESSION IS IN LAW SCHOOL: Hey, free house!
WHAT ADVERSE POSESSION IS IN THE REAL WORLD: Is this stupid fence an inch over the line going to blow up this person's home sale or what?
Shoutout to the attorney that added a clause to our preschool's enrollment contract that the student's family pays the school's attorney fees for a suit arising out of the contract, "regardless of result." If you're going to go, go big.
I am so glad so many find us helpful, but I look forward to days when normal folks don't have to look to
#AppellateTwitter
for analysis on the Republic's future.
"The filing of amicus briefs in connection with emergency applications is strongly discouraged" sighs the
#SCOTUS
clerk's office as it dockets amicus briefs in connection with this Texas emergency application to overthrow the election.
One of my favorite emails to send is bragging to the other partners about an associate who killed it. No matter how busy, taking a moment to send those emails will brighten the recipients' (and your) day. It extends to everyone else, too. Brag about people to their bosses.
At Conference today, the Chief will place two justices in separate offices. If one justice confesses but the other does not, the confessor goes free and the other gets 20 ERISA opinions. If both confess, each gets 5 ERISA opinions. If neither confess, each gets 1 ERISA opinion.
@nycsouthpaw
Three of them were given to the Fed, wonkiest, nerdiest of beings.
Seven to the assistant secretaries of the Treasury, great balancers of the federal books.
And nine, nine coins were gifted to the Justices, who above all else desire power.
But they were all of them deceived.
Respected former law professor. Former head of OIRA. Former
#SCOTUS
clerk. I guess attacking accomplished female judges who are the daughters of immigrants is okay when you think they won't rule how you want them to.
A little after 10 am today, I was supposed to stand at a podium and say "Thank you, Mr. Chief Justice and may it please the Court." Instead, around 10 am today, I got this picture.
Justice Kagan's first argument as Solicitor General (and ever) was Citizens United.
Elizabeth Prelogar's first argument as Solicitor General will be SB8.
Debut big or go home for the two women solicitors general.
#AppellateTwitter
Folks are talking hours, and I'll share my one oft-shared pieces of advice: The marginal cost of each hour after a certain point is higher and higher. The delta between 2000 and 2100 isn't 100 hours. It's nights, weekends, and holidays away. Judge firms accordingly.
NEW: Acting Solicitor General files letter with
#SCOTUS
in the pending ACA case stating that the "United States no longer adheres to the conclusions in the previously filed brief of the federal respondents."
#AppellateTwitter
My super power is being the person on the thread who changes the subject line on the email to what we are actually talking about now instead of what we were talking about twenty reply-alls ago.
Law practice can be good.
An associate who is lead counsel on an appeal had a baby right before a court dropped a briefing schedule on us. I ask for a significant extension to accommodate his leave.
Everyone - clients, co-counsel and opp. counsel - send congrats and consents.
Some personal news, as they say here on Twitter: I have been elected a partner of
@HoganLovells
.
This is a milestone seven years in the making, so I hope you don't mind if I gush a bit about the people who got me here. /1
PROFESSORS: "Judges don't accept subpar work. Even a small mistake will get your brief thrown out!"
ME TODAY: [Reads a a brief where the Table of Authorities is alphabetized by author's first name.]
Okay, I just checked the docket and this is even less than a clerical oversight. CADC issued this in response to the docketing of the notice of appeal, which is, of course, filed in the district court. So nothing has been filed in CADC for which admission is required.
Defendant with Yale J.D. arrested on seditious-conspiracy charges.
TWITTER LAWYERS: "So, the thing you need to understand about seditious conspiracy is . . ."
ACTUAL LAWYERS ON TWITTER: "lol that's yale for you."
A remarkable 33K likes and 5k retweets based on a misunderstanding of how new cases are set up in PACER. Trust reputable courts reporters, folks. (Trump is not pro se.)
BREAKING: Trump is representing HIMSELF, with no lawyer at all, in his case against the United States regarding the search of Mar-a-Lago and recovery of government records.
The legal term is “pro se” - for himself.
He could not find anyone to represent him.
I support free speech, but there should be uniform rules on whether there is a comma before an organization designation like Inc. or LLC and we shouldn't let companies choose for themselves. /1
One thing we do in lawyering a lot is confuse the proxy with the thing it's a proxy for. Even if you think someone's LSAT (like someone's law school or clerkship) is a decent proxy of lawyer quality, it is no match for someone's track record of quality as a lawyer.
ME: Well, the pandemic has been hard, but just keeping my head above water at work and my kids alive is an accomplishment.
SIDLEY FIRST-YEAR ASSOCIATE MATT SIMPSON:
Hearsay is a relative concept! A document or statement isn't hearsay or not! It's hearsay or not with respect to particular purposes! A statement might be hearsay when offered for one purpose but not another! I love hearsay!
Marotta & Marotta is delighted to announce it has expanded to a four-person Firm. Senior partner and baby boy junior associate are doing well, and the newly promoted senior associate can't wait to start mentoring.
#AppellateTwitter
#PracticeTuesday
I don't know who needs to hear this, but Dr. Seuss books are long. If you agree to read your kid "one more book" and get conned into doing Dr. Seuss, buckle up. This is no Sandra Boynton board book. You're tackling environmentalism or growing old over 50 pages.
This is a small thing, but RBG was very much the voice of civil procedure on the Court. When she talked civ pro, everyone listened. I'm so sorry I won't get the chance to talk to her about it.
One of my biggest victories in trial court was when I was an undergrad and had an theory for why campus tickets were unenforceable but the cop didn't show up and the judge asked if I wanted to move to dismiss for failure to prosecute and I said "yes."
Let's see an A.I. do that.
ME, SETTLING BACK DOWN AT MY COMPUTER AFTER PRESCHOOL PICKUP: "Oh, thank God Westlaw logged me out for my safety. I was terrified the kids' stuffed animals were going to run some ALLFEDS searches while I was out."
J. BREYER, SPECIAL MASTER: "So I have some documents here. Some people say they're privileged and some people say they're not. And you want me to go back and read the documents and I will, but my question for you is, what do I do about all the paper I have? That's my question."
5YO: "What's a lawyer?"
ME: "Sometimes if you need to know what the rules are or if you have a disagreement with someone, like you say I owe money and I say I don't, lawyers can help."
5YO: (Thinks). "I want to be more importaner! I'm going to be a firefighter!"
Kids.
Do you think an attorney can stick a sick 5YO in front of CLE and train him to hit the button to confirm that I'm . . . he's . . . still watching?
Asking for a friend.
Given the Chief's question to Texas about whether Texas is bound by Supreme Court precedent, we will soon learn whether Mitchell arguing today is merely a bad idea or a very bad idea.
John Roberts furiously writing a memo explaining that the Chief need not preside over the impeachment trial of a former president and he's really quite busy anyway and doesn't know when he could possibly fit it in.
ME LAST NIGHT: "I'm just going to pull an all-nighter and bang out this draft, no problem."
ME TODAY: "I am so tired and the draft is not done."
It turns out I am older than I was when I began this job.
Forget the Supreme Court or courts of appeals. There is no force in the legal universe more powerful than an Article I bankruptcy judge's automatic stay.