cruellae | Emanator of the Order
@antithesiscrow
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(she/her) \\ over 21 \\ sunday oak apologist pfp by @luxiaar
Penacony
Joined November 2019
new #sunturine fic! featuring sugar d4ddy Aventurine .relevant tag: power bottom Aventurine.bonus tag: virginity kink
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the thing about fic is that occasionally you come across someone who has incredible, breathtaking, lyrical prose. a true master of the craft. and they're using these gifts to write your favorite character getting sex pollened. what a beautiful world we live in.
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the whale in the childe boss fight is made of hydro, right? it’s not a real animal. therefore the only possible explanation for the sound it makes is that childe is doing the whale call himself.
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it must be terrifying to be a student in the akademiya. imagine getting an MLA citation wrong and someone sends fucking cyno after you.
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Childe returns from Snezhnaya with a ring in his pocket and a proposal speech ready to go. But when he walks into Zhongli’s house, he’s greeted by chaos. Receipts are everywhere, Ganyu is filling out paperwork at a manic pace, and Hu Tao is frantically going through timesheets,.
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someone like alhaitham is actually really good for someone with depression or another mental illness. his partner can trust in his emotional steadiness; he's not easily thrown off balance but is a rock of support. he also probably loves the energy and intensity his person brings.
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/4.1 spoilers. It made me so sad to see how alone Childe really is. The Fatui just want to use him for diplomatic leverage. The Traveller is way more interested in the mysteries of Meridope, and no one feels any urgency even though Childe has been missing for *weeks*.
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I think one reason people underestimate Childe’s abilities is his age. He's 23 but he's being compared to ancient and immortal beings. At 23, Signora was perfectly ordinary. When Zhongli was 23, he was probably just a pebble.
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i think the reason zhongli and childe in particular are mischaracterized so much is simply that they are extremely complex characters. they are some of the best characters in genshin (or any game) and the reason is this: they contradict themselves.
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how to show you are a person of taste and culture
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"People are saying I resemble the Geo Archon Rex Lapis? How peculiar; this is the first I've heard of it. As you can see, we are nothing alike. For starters, this statue is clearly made of stone."
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Childe thinks it can never work. his duty is to the Tsaritsa; it takes him all over Teyvat. he can't stay in Liyue and play house, no matter how much he wants to. but Zhongli just laughs in that gentle way he has. "isn't it customary to travel when one retires?" he asks.
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hey everyone i made a #HonkaiStarRail quiz that is guaranteed to tell you which hsr character you are most like! please enjoy!! .
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“Hey Zhongli,” he says, catching up to the consultant. “You know which country has really chill tax laws? Snezhnaya! And I know a way you can become a citizen.” . Zhongli smiles indulgently as Childe reaches for the ring in his pocket. “I would like that very much.”.
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what if zhongli had never really loved anyone in the 6000 years before he found childe? . maybe the love he knew as an archon was a steady, benevolent love for his people. maybe his love for guizhong and his yakshas was kindly, fatherly, but distant. but then he retires--.
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I am so pissed that it has been YEARS since they interacted, this is literally a crime
whats a ship that pissed you off really badly , im curious to know.
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one of childe's most striking characteristics is his lack of anger, even in situations where anger is very warranted. he could be bitter about how unfair it is that he fell into the abyss as a child. he could be deeply furious at his family for sending him off to be a child--.
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when you make a schedule for which confidant to visit every single day of p5r to most effectively min max but then you get this text
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in case you're wondering what we're serving at chili's
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What if, despite his slender human form, Zhongli is actually extremely heavy to lift. Like a bag of rocks, or a man-sized pile of mora. Then Childe comes along, with his abyssal strength, and sweeps Zhongli off his feet. Literally AND metaphorically.
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my biggest fear is that something will be revealed about childe in Fontaine that makes all my fics wrong. i.e. childe: sorry gents I'm devastatingly straight . zhongli: sad dragon noises.
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we don't give childe enough credit for how smart he is, and we give zhongli too much credit for being smart. not that zhongli isn't smart, but he does have 6000 years of experience and a perfect memory, so he doesn't need the kind of quick thinking childe excels at.
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Zhongli, serenely brewing tea, explains the situation. Apparently, since he has no record of ever paying taxes, he’s now being audited. “Didn’t you invent the concept of taxes?” Childe asks, flabbergasted.
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inside me there are 2 wolf arguments:. 1. Childe is so sexy he must be constantly getting action, no way is he a virgin. 2. Childe is battlesexual and only morax is strong enough to stir his appetites.
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“I may be regretting that decision now.” Zhongli strokes his chin thoughtfully. “Well. I suppose I must face the consequences of my actions. I thank you all for your help in this trying time, and I will see you in ten years, when I am released.”.
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childe who? i play genshin for the story, lore, and combat only
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“Happy now?” she asks. “Quite. Just call me the next time you need an enemy to die a gruesome death. Or a normal one. I take requests.” . With that, Childe jumps off the Jade Chamber, his glider extending just in time to prevent him from colliding with the ledge by Wangsheng.
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“Yes, of course.” Zhongli gives him a slightly bemused smile. “I’m not sure what all the fuss is about.”. The fuss, of course, is that if Zhongli can’t produce the requested paperwork, he’ll be tossed in jail for tax evasion.
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do you think that Childe gets upset when Zhongli shields him? because it takes all the challenge out of the fight and basically makes him invincible. it's no fun if you can't die, after all.
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the zhongchi dragonfucking fic is complete! . tag for this chapter: angst with a happy ending.bonus tag: double dong zhong
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“Well, I suppose it’s only fair,” Zhongli says, as they discuss the potential penalties. “I have been a proud citizen of Liyue for many years and I haven’t paid taxes in all that time.”.
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“But you made so many other contributions!” Ganyu sniffles. “You’re the one who came up with the whole idea of taxes to begin with!”.
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A day after he’s imprisoned, Zhongli walks back into Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. “How did you get out?” Hu Tao pokes him curiously in the side to make sure he’s not a ghost. “Did you escape?” . “Actually, I was released. They said the whole thing was a mistake.”.
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Hu Tao, quite aware that there was no mistake, grins at him and welcomes him back to work anyway. She was shorthanded without him. From her perch atop the Jade Chamber, Ningguang watches business resume at Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, then turns to the man by her side.
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zhongli's new years resolutions: . 1. stop giving the Qixing advice, as they should handle things on their own.2. open a savings account and contribute 7% of each paycheck to it .3. court Childe properly and with the requisite decorum, with a goal of proposing marriage in 2 years.
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if we're talking about childe's strength i'm gonna bring this back out again
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AITA for lying to my boyfriend about being a six thousand year old archon because telling the truth would have messed up my retirement plans?.
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Dear Traveler,. I’m writing this letter on behalf of my spouse, as it is his birthday today. Childe would write you himself, but unfortunately he is currently not able to walk. Worry not, this injury will not be long lasting. --.
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akechi in the first two semesters is the justice arcana reversed: dishonesty, denial, disregard of consequences, retribution. but then. third semester akechi becomes the justice arcana upright: he sees the truth when others are caught in lies and judges the guilty (Maruki) fairly.
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"i don't get it," Childe says. "you are my treasure," Zhongli said. "there is nothing i value more. and so i make of you my home. wherever you go, i will be there also.". a weight lifted off of Childe's shoulders with that promise. all he wanted was to have Zhongli by his side.
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imagine childe’s version of that domain that shows people their worst fears. they go in it expecting some gnarly, fucked up abyss monster but instead it's just zhongli looking disappointed and making that "tut-tut" noise.
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(spoiler: childe is totally wrong about the Wedding Night)
new wip: arranged marriage au.
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Zhongli deserves credit for being the only stable Archon. Every other Archon is a hot mess in one way or another.
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this makes them intriguing, complex, fascinating, and extremely shippable, but leaves them open to mischaracterization when people manage to forget that the mild-mannered zhongli is also the warrior god morax, or that the ruthless tartaglia is also the family-oriented boy ajax.
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no question it is this moment
enough bad characterization on the tl what's the most in-character thing ur fave has ever done.
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i made a meme for the chapter of the dragonfucking fic i just uploaded
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you’re futaba sakura and you just found this on akechi’s phone what next
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I think the real Morax was probably enormous, like the remains of the dragon in Fontaine. He just shrunk himself down to snack size for the Rite of Descension so he wouldn't crush Yujing Terrace.
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nobody is always on brand all the time. human beings are a mess of contradictions. the characterization of a real live person does not follow logic and is definitely not consistent. zhongli and childe are deliberately set up to show contradictory aspects of their personality.
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there are plenty of fics about the aftermath of the osial incident, but what about the aftermath of the cocogoat incident?
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maybe he had mortal lovers in the past, when he would walk incognito among his people. but he always held himself apart. he belonged to liyue; he was never truly theirs. but to childe, he gives himself over completely, heart and soul. like he has never done before.
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as someone whose partner is basically alhaitham, I can attest that this is true.
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it's 2020 but i still think every day about how akiren had friends and confidants and a whole stable of personas but akechi had none of that and no one and he still ALMOST WON.
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As the Archon Quests get more mature, darker, and more complex, Paimon is increasingly a detriment to the storytelling. Like we're watching Macbeth but every third line is spoken by a whiny flying five-year-old.
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--and he meets childe, a force of chaos who stirs his blood and brings joy to his days. and for the first time in 6000 years morax loves recklessly, passionately, desperately, and without restraint. as a human does. as childe does in return.
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while Childe is fighting in Inazuma, tracking down the Balladeer, Zhongli takes tea with Yae Miko, wanders the streets of Inazuma City, and samples the local cuisine. when Childe comes home, frustrated after weeks of finding nothing at all, Zhongli is a warm, steadying presence.
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"you know, there is a saying that dates back to the days when the skies were filled with dragons. "take that which you treasure most, and make of it your nest. 'this is likely where the silly idea of dragons sleeping on piles of gold came about, but there is some truth to it.".
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@cloudmachi I love how hsr can sometimes be wildly whimsical and sometimes too real like this.
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they return to Snezhnaya for Signora's funeral, and the Harbingers take turns trying to intimidate the god of contracts. later, once the Fair Lady's tomb is encased in ice and the frigid night has fallen, Zhongli pulls Childe aside and reminds him what it is to be warm.
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terms from childe's search history . "narwhal pics" ."are narwhals real" ."how to catch a narwhal" ."liyuen word for do you want to have sex" ."rex lapis location" ."liyuen word for do you want to fight" ."dragon and phoenix chopsticks" ."liyuen wedding customs".
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next it's a recon mission in Sumeru, clearing the path for Dottore to do his experiment. Zhongli spends his days in the Akademiya, sometimes a student and sometimes a teacher, and his nights helping Childe wash the blood off his hands.
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as he once was a being of unimaginable power, zhongli has always had to be carefully controlled in his actions and words. as rex lapis, he was the guide for his people to follow, the model of behavior and decorum, and he retains that poise. except when it comes to childe--.
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which makes it all the more striking that he doesn't just laugh it off when he finds out zhongli has been lying to him. almost like he expected all those other betrayals, but he trusted zhongli. he expected zhongli to be different. and when it turns out he's not--.
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"aren't you tired of traveling?" Childe asks Zhongli, when new orders send him to the shores of Fontaine. "you don't have to stay with me. you can go home." . Zhongli smiles fondly, taking Childe's hand.
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new fic! .Relevant tag: alpha/beta/omega dynamics .Bonus tag: zhongli has an omega harem (but dw he only fucks childe)
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You will always shine like gold in my memories.
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the zhongchi dragonfucking i promised is (almost) here! . (zhongli wrecks him in ch 1, then morax in ch 2)
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what if childe figured zhongli out early on but kept working his plan because he knew that seeing liyue overcome a difficult trial was "the best gift anyone could have given this god of old".
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childe's new years resolutions: . 1. master the catalyst.2. get good at chopsticks.3. become the greatest Snehznayan toy seller so I'm not lying to Teucer anymore .4. defeat the Traveler in a spar .5. take Zhongli (in a fight).6. take Zhongli (not in a fight).
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fic writers and artists should never be afraid to write/draw a scene or trope that has been done 10000x before in the fandom because a. more cake and also b. your uniqueness as a human being means that your take on it will be different from everyone else anyway. so go for it!.
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wip! Zhongli is the president of Liyue facing a reelection campaign where he's criticized for being unmarried. So he hires Childe, the high class escort he sees periodically, to pose as his fiance and later, his husband. What could go wrong?
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A little Zhongchili threadfic: fluff about how Zhongli can’t swim. Zhongli and Childe take a much needed vacation to Fontaine. Zhongli, who sinks like a stone in any body of water, takes a leisurely stroll on the sea bottom while Childe swims by his side.
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thank you ilya for this awesome prompt!! here goes: . Childe wakes up chilled and disoriented, his skin clammy and his limbs leaden. He struggles to sit up and a firm hand lands on his shoulder, warm press of fingers on dry skin, pushing him down. “Please rest.”
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my zhongchi omegaverse fic is complete! .relevant tag: explicit sexual content.bonus tag: childe is needy (but he gets what he needs)
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--soldier just because he was difficult . he could be angry at his archon for treating him like a weapon without care for his wellbeing . he could be pissed that the traveler just abandoned him in some weird domain to eat radishes and fight monsters nonstop. but he's just. not--.
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unpopular opinion/hot take: goro doesn't actually like pancakes that much he was just desperate to make conversation with some unusually attractive shujin trash boy.
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--it will probably take more than fierce combat to mend what's broken between them.
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whatever action he's referencing here!
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i fully endorse these crimes and i think he should do more.
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you can't tell me this isn't canon
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new fic! expect a lot of angst and hurt/comfort and a zhongchi baby on the way!
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new chapter of my sugar daddy zhongchi fic!. (Link below)
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Rex Lapis almost never slept. There was always too much to do. But in his retirement, Zhongli sleeps until the sun is high and lazes about in the mornings whenever he can get away with it. Childe teases him about it but enables the behavior by bringing him breakfast in bed.
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pls hoyoverse 😭
what are two characters you’d wanna put in a room together just to see what happens.
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new (incredibly self indulgent) zhongchi fic featuring sugar daddy zhongli <3. (link below)
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ruminating on the symbolism of Akechi being the justice arcana and its assorted personas
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if zhongli gave me a mindless fetch quest every day i would do it happily and ask for more plz sir.
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not zhongli planning to fake his own death and return in a female form, perhaps posing as his estranged sister.
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tell me you love childe without telling me you love childe
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it's so obvious that zhongchili are OTP coded like sure there are a lot of great ships in genshin but this is the one that will tie you to the rigging and never let you get off.
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/3.3 archon quest spoilers/ sort of. my main criticism of the new archon quest is that zhongli did not appear even once. what is the point of a quest with no zhongli? i can only hope lantern rite corrects this egregious oversight.
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imagine if zhongli sent childe's birthday letter like how yae sent ei's. Greetings Traveler, . I hope this missive finds you well. I’m sending this on Childe’s behalf as it is his birthday today.
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/zhongchi, modern au . poker dealer zhongli / high roller childe.
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