Ahmed Salah
@anAhmedSalah
Followers
2,093
Following
939
Media
3,788
Statuses
29,979
he/him Author of Man's Best Friend
Toronto / Mogadishu
Joined July 2009
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Pinned Tweet
Sunlight reflecting off a river and onto the bark of a tree
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@ExileGrimm
Ashamed to admit that I used to think people who homeschooled their kids were cranks
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Just found out about the theory that Justin Trudeau is Fidel Castro's son and there is no amount of evidence than will make me not believe it
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Fed’s own economist warns of “severe recession” from Chair Powell’s rate hikes by
@kenklippenstein
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@classicallyabby
Imagine being so desperate for a woman's attention that you see this shit and ask for the recipe
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@BirdRespecter
How many guys driving this are gonna crash while staring into their own eyes in the rear view mirror?
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I'll take career suicide on behalf of apartheid for $800
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@BoltzmannBooty
Also, she has a harness for the gun but is apparently ready to drop the baby at a moment’s notice
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If being pessimistic was an Olympic event, I'd probably finish 4th.
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@ExileGrimm
Also, the concentration of political power into Clinton and Obama “machines” prevented the development of a new generation of palatable democrats
They chose control of the executive over a strong party apparatus and ended up with neither
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@ShabanaMir1
If you die after running towards the sound of kids chatting with a gun in hand all I can say is that I’m not gonna attend your funeral
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@Anarch_King
@jefmbv
There are three times more vacant homes than homeless people yet they want to build a better sleeping bag
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@curtharding
@CBSNews
Even in this ludicrous scenario you'd still have money after buying the sandwich than if you spent $5 of your $7.25
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If vaccines were dangerous they wouldn’t only be widely distributed in rich countries
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Moses: I just spoke with God
Aaron: No way!
Moses: Yahweh
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@BuenoForMiami
@PplsCityCouncil
That’s sad. Out of curiosity, what was your grandfather charged with?
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Proof that depressive ideations aren’t always inaccurate
‘Jeopardy!’ host Mayim Bialik: ‘I feel useless, irrelevant and worthless’
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Biden’s secret service agents have been told to be on the look out for anyone trying to approach him in a diagonal line
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Even worse when you consider that a $1,000 emergency now is just your freezer breaking and having to replace groceries
Most Americans can't afford a $1,000 emergency: survey
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My dad once told me that the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference
I asked him what he meant, but he wasn't paying attention
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@mullymt
@EverydayBastiat
What you view as distinct periods of post-Soviet history were simply different stages of the same process of primitive capital accumulation
The economic frontier you felt excited to witness really the centralization of power in the hands of an unaccountable class
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@Mont_Jiang
America claims to be the pinnacle of democracy, but their leaders could not be more divorced from the reality of the people
Under what definition is that democratic?
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@GoodPoliticGuy
They brought him on as an expert regarding nuclear war because he has a missile silo on his head
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@RSpanklin
@netoneko
@drmistercody
@IDF
Follow the IDF and turn on notifications to find out if you're gonna become homeless
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They say you should never meet your heroes
As the police dispersed, the right wingers took turns stepping on the thin blue line flag they had originally brought to support the cops.
"You have been declared to be treasonists," one yelled at officers leaving. "Only one punishment for treason."
"Fuck the blue!"
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@jessehawken
I am waging a similar fight, only I am trying to get more heart-healthy food options at Chuck E Cheese
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@kimpossiblefact
Seems as if every other paragraph details a hilarious waste of his parents money
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@ExileGrimm
I meant that they had their own power centres that drained the recourses of the party, not that it was one big apparatus shared between them
Maybe I wasn’t clear
They hate each other almost as much as twitter leftists—it’s the only thing I like about them
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Fun prank: fall asleep with an empty pill bottle in hand
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Did you all miss the state sponsored killings or something
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Oscar Wilde said he never wrote down some of his best ideas and you have 80k tweets
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In the event of a tragic death I have specified in my will which selfie I want to be given to the local news.
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@AspLovePolitics
@nypost
Excuse me? Are you questioning the veracity of this footage clearly showing a brave Ukrainian pilot avoiding Russian air defence systems?
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@robertcaruso
Robert Caruso: "Everyone should be held accountable for their actions"
Also Robert Caruso:
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@lgsorceress
@eshaLegal
We had a neighbor who once brought us lasagna made with hotdogs and even then we just sad thanks and appreciated the sentiment
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I’m gonna start telling folks who are into astrology that billionaires are trying to make their own space programs so they can control everyone’s horoscope
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@Chinchillazllla
@remonwangxt
@LiuXininBeijing
Libs love homophobic attacks on politicians they disapprove of almost as much as they love painting rainbows on warplanes
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I tried to get a new lease on life, but I was rejected after the credit check.
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@TSSteinbacher
His parents showed a lot of foresight by giving him a name from ancient Greece
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@robrousseau
@LizardRumsfeld
Called it
Can't wait to see Biden campaign on restoring competency to American coups
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@HueofJoe
Can't believe I gave money to a dude who tweeted something he said in every single stump speech
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I'm ashamed to admit that after I read Ulysses by James Joyce I threw it in the trash
I was 20 then, and I've matured
I'm sure if I read it now I'd throw it in the recycling bin
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@LadyIzdihar
@catcontentonly
The concerns are projection
American social media companies work in a back door for American intelligence agencies so the assumption is that TikTok would do the same
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Folks who tell people not to protest because they might get arrested and lose the ability to vote without questioning why participation in democracy leads to your exclusion from it make me glad I went bald before I could rip my hair out
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My brother's girlfriend has got him to watch the vampire diaries
The memorial service for his balls will be held this Sunday
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Sentences like "I wasn't being pretentious, I was being condescending" are why I don't have many friends
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Happy birthday to Mick Jagger, lead singer of the Rolling Stones, a popular Howlin' Wolf cover band
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Say what you want about feudalism, but at least you didn't have to watch the men-at-arms do the Macarena before they attacked you
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"It is child endangerment to bring a child to a protest with police," the pro-police losers scream, not realizing that they're telling on themselves.
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To clarify, botched crimes are no longer crimes?
Asking for a friend
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Not as good as the burning of that MN police station, but still nice to see
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My parents were so good at hiding the signs of a beating you'd think they were cops.
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Me and the boys when the al Qassam brigades releases another video
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Hey, dog barking from a balcony
Get a twitter account like the rest of us
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This pillow still smells like her
Because I just took it from her house
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@herosnvrdie69
@GravelInstitute
It probably made much more of an impact coming as a recommendation from you than it would have if she just stumbled upon it, so yes,
@GravelInstitute
&
@briebriejoy
did a great job, but you should pat yourself on the back too
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@jdreesiii
@meowingabyss
@ExileGrimm
Ideally it’d supplement a high quality public education
Most parents can’t provide that (due to financial and time constraints)
Most parents who can probably shouldn’t
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If you live in the past, you're depressed. If you live in the future, you're anxious. If you live on twitter, you need a hug.
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@kenklippenstein
@LizardRumsfeld
@SarcasmStardust
Can someone provide me with a formula to determine how many tweets we should have on a topic relative to its importance?
If not, could you help me make one by telling me how much closer each tweet gets us to the goal?
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@ShabanaMir1
More and more I think we should just let off EMPs in our neighborhood and return to agropastoralism
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