Elle ⚘️🍉
@__shiticantsay
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hi, I'm the problem, it's me
Cirencester, England
Joined November 2020
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If you'd told me in the 90s that 30 years later Comic Relief wouldn't be funding mosquito nets, malaria medication and clean water but instead appealing for food banks for British people, I would have said you'd lost your mind. The Tories have really fucked this country.
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Is it weird to write a thank you card to your therapist 2 years after your therapy sessions ended? I just really want to tell him that I went from panic attacks and sobbing every time I had to take the bin out to having the time of my life at the Eras Tour thanks to him.
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@syderature
This kid ATE PAINT (which they're putting on chicken pox rashes instead of something soothing) and they're... wiping it out of his mouth with a wet wipe??????
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@fionacrapple
@ilanacubana
Yet all the fans who were teenagers during his One Direction days and continued to follow him are now 25-32. I think that girl just straight up doesn't know anyone over 21 😂
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This has got to be the best present of the year - a meat thermometer from my mum. I've been a vegetarian for 25 years 😅
#JoinIn
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@kkkolored
@MuradMerali
I think it might have been different without Luca and Gemma - a lot of people really liked all 3 other couples but voted strategically as Ekin Su and Davide felt like the only ones with a chance.
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Pommel Horse Guy should get an extra difficulty point to compensate for the fact he can't see the fucking pommel horse
#Olympics
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@myfriendcallie
I see this and I raise you: your owner putting you in a silly little rain coat and then having to go on a walk where all your friends will see you
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@Cooperstreaming
The replies are wildly depressing so I want to share the opposite: when he retired, my Grandad (who had never even made toast before) decided to do ALL the cooking & cleaning from then on. He said my Grandma had spent years looking after him and the kids and now it was his turn.
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@cloudevelina
@syderature
This is marginally better, but still not going to soothe the itching for the kid - and the wiki article says it's toxic if swallowed 🙃
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I've just had the slightly horrifying realisation that
#Strictly
opening the show with early 00s hits in 2024 is the same level of nostalgia as if they'd used songs from the 80s back in 2004. Help.
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@55mmbae
Everyone is like, "Bring a flask! Sneak alcohol in!" Or just... respect your friend's choices? If going a couple of hours without a drink is impossible for you or you can't imagine enjoying a wedding without being drunk then you need help.
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Every single time there is something successful or popular, there is a barrage of social media posts like this and they always smack of a weird sense of superiority for being "above" the trend. You don't need to announce the things you're not watching.
#TheTraitors
Am I the only person who a) has never watched the traitors b) is not going to watch it &c) is bored rigid by the whole hoo-ha going on about it?
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@Jo_W_11
He'd actually rather risk you stealing the car and lose his job than wear a mask 🤯
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@punkistani93
People saying this didn't happen have clearly never lived in Wales. Even the most racist man in Swansea hates a bloke from Cardiff more than he hates a bloke from Pakistan.
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@theashleyray
I think there are a LOT of people who would benefit from having a job they could leave at work. And there's a real satisfaction in doing something physical/"real" as opposed to sending emails all day and being mentally exhausted but physically wide awake.
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Polly chill the fuck out, is it not embarrassing to be so far up Stephen's arse purely for the sake of pissing off Hannah? You had to BEG your husband to sleep with you and now this?
#MAFSUK
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Rick Astley felt like such a random choice for this but he's actually a lot more entertaining than anyone else BBC have had on for the last few NYEs!
#RickAstleyRocksNewYearsEve
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@seaglummm
Right?? Plus she recognises that not thinking that's cute means she doesn't want kids and that's really important. It's not like she said it was bad behaviour or the other person was a bad mother.
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@buenaventureno
@hatuez
Assuming someone can't speak English because they're not from the west makes you look racist.
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I appreciate how Jordan feels but Chanita is a social worker and will therefore be quite used to spotting ADHD and referring kids on for assessment. He's obviously not ready to hear it and that's natural and OK but it does seem like she was trying to be helpful
#MAFSUK
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You'd think a dictionary would understand the concept of different languages
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@feralmeemaw
@ProtonInspector
Full of ants, covered in resin, came from Temu where everything is full of lead... WHY would you eat it????
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@mo0nandsaturn
@jrivers_99
Tracks that someone who makes their username "Mrs Husband's Name" would write something like this.
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Weird that Jayden has so much to say about Timothy but nothing about Jack and his blatant misogyny or abusive red flags
#MAFSAU
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@horrorlor
Agreed, I definitely think multiple songs reference more than one person and some use the experience as a jumping off point but don't actually recount what happened (e.g. BDIL).
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Look I hate to defend Tori but why is some girl with Sharpie-drawn eyebrows and a severe over-reliance on purple shampoo who is best friends with her gym PT out here calling anyone else basic?
#MAFSAU
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Unpopular opinion but I actually like having adverts during
#gbbo
so I can see what everyone's saying on twitter without missing anything 😅
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In honor of the 6th anniversary of Derry Girls, what was your favorite moment from the show?
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@_YoshIsLanguid
I remember telling my therapist I wasn't suicidal because I knew I'd never be able to do anything painful like this and I said, I just wish I could press a button and erase myself from existence. He was like:
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@Shadia_H_M
@jasebyjason
I hope everyone uses this against the company forevermore. "How close were you to the village postman, really? Do you need to go to his funeral?" "Closer than I was to the Queen."
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The way Jayden calls Eden's moments of severe anxiety and panic "threats" and "ultimatums" makes me really uncomfortable. He's constantly putting her in flight or fight mode and then acting like she's being controlling and manipulative
#MAFSAU
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The Pirates of the Caribbean movies started over 20 years ago. They're not relevant to kids today. This is just some weird dishevelled drunk dude bumbling his way around a children's hospital, scaring the kids while using them as a prop to repair his image.
Johnny Depp Surprises Kids at Hospital in Spain with Visit in 'Pirates of the Caribbean' Costume
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@B0nesJones
@Liz_Lemon_CoolJ
"He's not mean on twitter while he's locked away in a villa where they don't have internet and he is therefore superior to you"
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@cowboylikehale
This is truly the only way to make friends as an introvert. You need an extrovert to adopt you.
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@adamfare1996
Why are people acting like Gillick competency is a brand new "woke" thing and not something that has been around for 30 years? 🤦♀️
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@ANGELISWIFT
To be fair even pre-Brexit if an artist said they were doing a "European" tour I wouldn't automatically have assumed that included the UK.
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@EssenceGant
She keeps saying, "What about what I was going through?" as though a work colleague having an opinion on your controversial relationship is the same thing as finding out your husband of 10 years and the father of your kids is cheating on you.
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@DickDastardly__
Even if he didn't, a prenup for someone you've known three weeks should be a given. The show should be making them all get them.
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@swiftwarcraft
"Slept next to her but I dreamt of you all summer long" is such a boy apology
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@mirrorballbrook
I've always thought of this is me trying as singing to a past self who may be disappointed with where you ended up, one you wish you could get back to: "it's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you, you're a flashback in a film real on the one screen in my town"
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@shannnOxOx
I think there's a difference between not talking every day (normal) and 1 friend always initiating. If you're giving much more than you get then I think it's healthy to take a small step back & assess - not to punish, but just to figure out if you're both getting what you need.
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@imalltoowell
I think this is partly an age thing as well as everything you mentioned. Millennials used to document every part of our lives online but now many of us are using social media far less, or reading significantly more than we post.
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@ERosson1982
@teresawprice
I mean presumably the answer is "no" often enough that we had to invent c-sections
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@a_h_reaume
Someone at work said this to me when talking about Idris Elba possibly being James Bond. She said, "You can't do that, how would black people feel if we made a movie about Nelson Mandela and used a white actor to play him?"
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I genuinely do not understand how he ended up on this show because this man could date literally any straight woman in Britain - and apparently he applied too, he wasn't scouted!
#LoveIsBlindUK
Freddie is just a wonderful person. He has no bad word to say about anyone. He’s respectful to Cat. Its so refreshing to see how well he speaks, how well spoken to others, his parents and future partner must be so proud and lucky to have him
#LoveIsBlindUK
#LoveIsBlind
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@BrookeOConnorxo
It's not even like Sam's music has ever been targeted at kids either?! They were never a Disney kid or singing bubblegum pop. The expectations on young artists to stay "kid friendly" even when they're 30 are unfair (their audiences grow with them) but Sam has never been that.
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@repromantic
Can't believe she downgraded from "did you hear my covert narcissism I disguised as altruism?" to "the tennis court was covered up with some tent-like thing"
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@sianharries_
@portgasdworded
In a time when girls were expected to sit silently, be pretty and have no opinions, that's a very different thing to what it is today.
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@getawayeverlark
To be able to find enough healing and hope to bring two children into the world after everything they've been through is the happiest ending anyone could possibly ask for, surely?
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@Bartlebeans
@carbdiem
She didn't announce it. You people can't be happy with anything if a successful woman does it.
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@EwdatsGROSS
People in the replies firmly believing 18 is too young to be judged for his behaviour but 19 is more than old enough to get hit on by a 27 year old 🙃
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@sarahst02xx
I felt like Indiyah had missed out at first too but honestly she can do SO much better than a fast fashion brand with exploitative labour practices.
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@1goodtern
I've always had pretty severe social anxiety but I find when I'm masked and half my face is hidden, I simply care less. It's actually been really good for my anxiety to constantly test it this way and overcome it.
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Obsessed with the way he looks like a skinny nerd but then he whips off the jacket and the glasses and looks like this. Full Clark Kent moment.
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Reunion is FOUR WEEKS after final vows and Jono is already in an established relationship with Ellie? Oh that man is a villain
#MAFSAU
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@WelshieJess
"Without your husband's permission" - and when exactly did YOU get Terence's permission to kiss his wife, Luke?
#MAFSUK
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Paul saying Miles isn't helping and then immediately getting knocked out of the game the second he stops telling Paul where to run
#thetraitors
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@shirlpuzz
You know they're old money rich when they could afford the best hair treatments in the world but instead choose to have hair like this
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@Rosetheswift
POC are disproportionately impacted by poverty in the UK. A food bank is one of the best ways to support people of all races and religions here.
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@Allenmyouii
@mattxiv
I know this is not the point but I'm also concerned by the "sort of" toilet
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I absolutely adore Lauren. She's funny, smart, articulate, eloquent, and never afraid to stand up for what's right. Everyone needs a friend like Lauren in their corner. She deserves the world and I hope she gets it ❤️
#MAFSAU
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Don't worry about your A Level results. I was an obsessive overachiever and got 5As. Now I'm an underpaid charity worker with depression.
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@eastfan16
@fallibleangeI
No wonder she seemed so much happier from the moment Andrew stopped being best buddies with them. Hope she absolutely thrives away from all that!
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@TebiRex
This is like when I stayed with a family in Nepal and the dad didn't speak to me for two months until one night he got really drunk on homemade alcohol and said, "Diana. Accident in Paris. Tell everything."
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@hxsxsxh
I'm so sorry. Everyone trying to explain your own aunt's situation to you is missing the reality that age becomes a major factor if you're not wealthy. Insurance providers/NHS healthboards etc often decide older people aren't "worth" the cost.
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@SussexHenryVIII
"Because she has small children!" as though working mothers don't exist anywhere else in the world, juggling full time work without nannies, private chefs, cleaners, admin staff, drivers and butlers...
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@LoisM__
I think at this point it's pretty clear that it was just Brad talking about himself 😂
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@allis0nr_
@TopsBestFren
That's totally fine if you work at Starbucks but if you're in childcare you're not sticking it to capitalism, you're just hurting kids.
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As much as I love living alone and I'm enjoying my peaceful Christmas Eve, it can be tough to see the happy family photos flooding social media. Solidarity with anyone else avoiding FB and Instagram this Christmas!
#JoinIn
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@LiamDMartin1111
@fesshole
Nah Boris wouldn't have a free photographer, he'd have got us to pay for it
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@annatiscia
I cannot stand the way mental health has been weaponised in the pandemic. It only makes it harder for people with genuine mental illnesses. "Mental health" isn't interchangeable with "I just don't want to".
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It feels like Tim is coming out of decades-long depression and a numbness he used to protect himself. With those new highs comes feeling the lows for what they truly are again too. You look around and suddenly see your life anew. This is so tough. I love him.
#MAFSAU
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@cowboylikehans
If there are going to be multiple variants, I want them all announced at once so I can choose which one to buy. And I want one master album available at the end of it!
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@enerianna2
Something about the way she sings "I'm sure I've seen much hotter men but I really can't remember when" really scratches my brain
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@toIerateit
I don't know if it's the make up or his facial expressions or something they're doing in editing but every now and then his face literally looks AI generated and it really throws me off. All plastic and smooth.
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"He treats me like his opponent rather than a teammate", "I'm scared of conflict with him", "I can't get out of it unless I agree with him and say it's all good." Oh god Eden. Run girl.
#MAFSAU
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