KUNO NKUMΛLΛWI
@TwoSixty5
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Following
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Best Creative Content Creator of the Year 2023 •||• Follow me and I'll follow back. Follow me back if I follow you. •||•
Malawi
Joined July 2018
The University of TwitterMW has recognized the unrealistic Twitter life coach, Mr. Mwiza, and honored him with a Doctorate Degree in Land Management for owning a dozen plots in Lilongwe. 👏🏾👏🏾. Congratulations, Dr. Beacon! 👏🏾
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Nkhani zamu Celeb Gossip section zasintha kwambiri after the zeze space so we had to put a quick paper for today cuz we promised, we hope you enjoy it.
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Quote/comment with your favorite Chilima proverb.Ndayamba "Khoswe wa nzeru sadya mtedza wa mbeu"
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Fuel crisis yandikumbusa tweet iyi😭💀.I'll never leave this app🤣
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Distinguished members of the TwitterMW community, it is my honor to convey the outcome of today's board meeting—an eminent decision to introduce a new banknote in response to the devaluation of TwitterMw. This new banknote symbolizes valor and honors our self-proclaimed Founder.
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Twitter Times fam, help me win these Airbuds for my crush @dorischunga54 🥺🥺.She's my Dana Domoya. Like and retweet please
Follow @BlackviewMobile, like this tweet and quote this tweet. Your quote gets the most likes in 24 hours, you get the Airbuds 7. Easy!
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Vaulence kunalibe masiku amenewa so. Here's a quick recap. Yopanda nsuzi iyi🏃🏽😂
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Ladies and gentlemen, This month's Twitter Cooking Chain!
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"Asiyeni A'ba•le' alowe mkati".Anali akuthawa Mvula panja kani?😭😂😂
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I Got You Bro🤝🏽 Asasowe chokunena
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The Face vs. The English
I don’t have any content on twitter. I created twitter coz thawi Ina yake mukanamizana kuti if I come here I will not survive Nde I just had to bring my present here by public demands 👸I don’t follow and I will never follow. Just know kuti Tamia ja is on twitter basi. #Chizungu.
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The Legend Of Lwitiko .• Chocolate Filter Competition.• Scamming people.• Borrowing money to buy drugs.• Kunyela pa tebulo.• Ipondeni Fadah Saga.• Rehab Arc.• Sharing a cell with a rape suspect.• iPhone Heist.• Stealing from people on a WhatsApp version of PayChangu
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Pali Turn T-Shirts going @ 12K. Available tomorrow in Black, Red, White and Hot Pink. PreOrder yours now on WhatsApp: 0882924317. Kulikose otheka kutumiza🚶🏽
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There You Go Ma'am
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To quench your thirst just a little bit, yabwino titulusa sunday ngati anthu muphikane🚶🏽 ya khoxy mawa😅.
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I don't pay tithes to the church or pastors. Instead, I take the money and use it to buy school bags, exercise books, pens, and shoes for kids I meet who don't have those items. It's usually just 2 or 3 kids, but I'm still making a small difference with my limited funds🙇🏽♂.
What’s your contribution to society?.
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By public demand, the second section of The Twitter Times coming tonight 🏃🏽
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😂 anyamata omwe amagwirana pakhosi ndi anthu mu chizungu sabata imeneyi.
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The Best of "Imagine if Bible Characters were Malawian" Thread. -THREAD-
Is @Hyperloll4 's tweet a joke to you?.
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Basi gululu ndi Nivea wa anthu oshota mu Champion. Malingana ndi economy yi
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Headline yalero: "Twitter's Grammar Guru Takes a Tumble: Man Who Fixed Others' English Writes a Spelling That Crumbles" 😭😂.
Work up at midnight to do the usual,then I realized she's gone😭😭😭
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😂😂💀 No one would have guessed that the peace of mind would wind up not choosing him. #2024recap
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Ladies and gentlemen, the 2023 Twitter Calendar Recap Magazine will be released on the 20th of this month🥲.In the meantime, we have something new for all Twitter hustlers.
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MACRA should consider suspending internet services for at least a week. Chipwirikiti chili pa social media sindicho🤦🏽♂😂😂😂
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Came across this tweet today and it reminded me how the concept of Twitter times was stolen from @YamikaniMasese1. Dunno if he's aware, but when I saw his tweet, I saw a raw idea that could be refined into a masterpiece. Here's the unpublished first ever Twitter Times news 😭😂
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Toast to the keyboard warriors that twittermw lost on the way 🍻.Your cooking legacy has been engraved in the Twitter calendar and will be remembered forever.
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If this post hits 50 retweets, I will secure my first deal thanks to the Twitter Times, am so happy y'all 🥺. Help a bro out! Retweet and follow the link in the comments to like their FB page. Zikatheka Ndigawa credit ya 5 Pin Mawa🙏🏽. 50 retweets yokha, tikunge news ya 2023 ija.
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@KhwimaMchizi and his family watching y'all cook each coz of a tweet that was originally intended to express admiration for their beautiful family
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Nde mwati fans ili mmanja mwa apolisi ku Lingadzi fukwa cha gist yadzulo ija?
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Ndudikira mkazi winawake ayankhile nane ndibhudule yake😂
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THE FOUR HORSEMEN OF TWITTERMW DABATES.You know the debate's gon' be lit if one/all of these gentlemen are involved. And you’ll probably need to keep a dictionary close to keep up🔥😂
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"Hey google, define a gold digger"
Mumatifunatu koma kungokupemphani ndalama pang'ono kukwiya . Kaya nde mumati tizitanani tikakulolani. smh.
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Me researching new words for my next Twitter Times paper😂
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Ati "I can do with him anything I want" iweyo Mulungu?😂 Y'all need to get off your high horses. Yes, he has wronged you, but acting as if you control people's fate or are the most powerful person on earth is not the way to go; in fact, it's dangerous. .
I’ve got the attention that this @Itszingsmart is just a dumb kid in UNI. I could do with him anything i want but in the end we all make mistakes. Cyber bullying is a serious issue please be careful what you say to people. I struggle to get through it everyday. I’m not a tree
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"Gwamba wayima pa chulu, ine ndatulukirapo ngati ngumbi".Koma Achina GA😂🙌🏽
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It's truly Heartbreaking💔. A mere 10 days after the loss of Atoht Manje, we find ourselves once again mourning the departure of another great musician. We've lost the 'Mau Anga' Star Y'all😭. May the soul of Thomas Chibade Rest in Eternal Peace🕊
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Zoyikana pa map tiziyike kaye pambali, uku mwafikako💀😂 mnyamata wa man u kukangana nayo English eh🙌🏽😭.Indastry?
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Interviewer: Pretty Young for what you're doing.@Kenneth03Mw : I'm doing bachelor's of arts in african musicology.Interviewer: 😬great great
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Munthu kubisa nkhope kuti asaphikidwe. Anthu akukamuphika fukwa wabisa nkhope💀😭 .Twitter is not a real place🤣🤣🤣
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Me, who got my certificate at Sanwecka watching from afar
Mukamaliza kupanga zooneka ngati degree komwe muliko chonsecho mphamvu ndi mzimu wa degree zinaukana, mupiteno ku University mukapange Degree. If you didn't make it to a public University in Malawi, vomerezani ndinu mbuli.
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2024 TWITTER CALENDAR RECAP . THREAD
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It's Official.Dr. S.K. Chilima is has passed away in a tragic plane crash😭.Rest in Peace Amfana Oganiza Bho🕊
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Ku City Heist ati wina wathira paper spray show ili mkati🤦🏽♂️😂 mpaka fans kuyamba kutulukamo. Si abale amenewa koma?.
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If only he hadn't dropped this album on the same day as Zeze, we'd all be talking about this project🔥🥺 a 10/10 project. Mfana wayiphika album yi eh🙌🏽 koma nzeru zinamuvutirapo pa date yotulutsirayo🤦🏽♂😂
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HOW TO PREPARE SWEET POTATOES WITH MAYONNAISE THREAD.[Sweet Potatoes & Egg Salad]
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Word on the street has it that GOAT wanu winawake amakonda kumenya akazi ake mpaka banja lasanduka la CDSS
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Imma just leave this here
Who is bigger between these 2?😂.
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