Dami | Blockchain
@Sir_Damilare
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Developer Marketing || Doing stuffs for @base in Africa || Partner @CDsecurity_ || Ex: @0xPolygon , @blockchain , @ngxgrp
Onchain
Joined August 2019
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Pinned Tweet
It's not everyday you see the Creator of one of the leading L2s, incubated by the most powerful brand in the industry, speak highly about your work in your absence.
Grateful to the Giver of Life 🙏
Serra just showed me a video Jesse made last Friday speaking about my work.
Omoo I almost went teary.
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When you decide to shoot your shot but you suddenly sight "🔱" in her username
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John: Have you ever had s*x?
Amaka: No dear, I'm a virgin
Virgin Amaka on wedding night:
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Last borns when they're denied what they want VS when they get it
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When a feminist sees a fellow feminist heavily pregnant
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The attention your Influencers get on Twitter VS in real-life
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Guy: Since when I set my eyes on you, I've been unable to remove them. You're such a beauty
Girl: Awwwn thanks...I'm short of words
Guy: *Frowns*
Girl: What's wrong?
Guy: Haha...how can you be short and still be short of words?
Girl:
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Alleged email sent to laid-off Twitter employees.
Seems much humane than the social media PR though...
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If you still use hot water to bath in this weather, I'm sorry to say, but Hell was built for you.
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Any small thing "Mad Oh"... and you too will become a Father in this decade? Tragic Oh😂
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Guy: Can I press small plss?
Girl: Ehn...press what? Wetin do your mama own?
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When Jide decides to show the world what his lecturer does to female students, only to find out his girlfriend is the victim
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When you tweet innocently about women just to laugh
Feminists on Twitter:
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*January*
John: It's either 2020 or nothing😤
"March*
John:
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When she tells me she's Home Alone...only for me to get there & find out she's on her period
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"Oya Amaka, tell your Father who impregnated you?"
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Some people's body count is higher than their GPA... Tragic😂😭
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*In an interview*
Interviewer: So you're a First class accounting graduate right?
Me: Yes pls
Interviewer: Can you briefly state the number of Companies you've worked as an accountant for?
Me:
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Frank: Hey Jessie!
Jessie: Hi Frank! It's been a while.
Frank: How have you been?
Jessie: I've been good, thanks.
Frank: You look good. You know I've always loved you and I'll continue to...
Jessie: [Cuts in] Bros, Oya dey go...
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Invigilator: Hey you! Why were you talking? Oya submit your paper!
Amaka: But sir
Invigilator: I said submit your paper!
Amaka: Pls Can I see you in your office?
Invigilator:
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Your girlfriend claims 2020 is her Year...but she still opens her leg wide for Retweets
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*Me in bed*
My Dad: Iya Dml, I think we should increase Dml's pocket money. What do you feel?
My mum: Increase what? Don't let us spoil this boy abeg
Me:
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Nysc Corps Members before VS after Valentine
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When I ask the only Professor in Theology Dept why God needed Adam's ribs in forming Eve when He only used dust in forming Adam
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Pls know this. God wouldn't put your help into the hands of someone that doesn't know your worth. He's a God of value afterall.
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Are you aware Carrot is orange, but Orange is not Carrot.
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Amaka on Instagram Vs Amaka in real life
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Between these two Hilarious skit-makers, who's your favorite??
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Boss: You came late to work throughout last month; you're coming late today again? You're Fired!
Secretary: Okay sir... Should I send you those "movies" we made?
Boss: Ahn ahn... I was just kidding now. You take things too serious
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Me: Mummy pls my hungry oo. Wetin dey?
Mum: Ehn shebi the food we cooked in the morning still remains? Just go and heat it
Me: I don't h(eat) what I h(ate) already
Mum:
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BF: Awwwn you look so beautiful in that outfit
GF: *Chuckles* Thanks hun. That my bestie, kunle gave it to me. I so much love it.
BF: Eyah...I think it's time you changed Boyfriend
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In the relationship, the male is the Bank; the female is the Customer.
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Amaka: Father, I think I have a problem
Father Emeka: What's it dear sister?
Amaka: I have been dating this guy for the past 6months and he has never asked for us to be intimate. Father, tell me, am I not sexy enough?
Father Emeka:
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You dey claim say you be badass Influencer but your CGPA na 2.50😂💔.
Sir, Influence your Cgpa first😂🚶
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iPhone 12!? No be just "30mins" ago dem release iPhone 11 pro max😧
It seems we need to start reminding
@Apple
that Money doesn't grow on trees... Only Apples do😒
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Nigeria is so spoilt to the extent that our politicians exploit the nation and still show it off to us on Social Media😂
Have you seen your Senator's new mansion?
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Eibar Defenders' confidence when they see Messi running towards them with the ball...
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@prodlouisxiv
@ayedocc
Not hard in anyway bro.
1. Rihanna is a Billionaire. This lady? Maybe has a few thousands.
2. Rihanna is more famous.
3. Rihanna carries his child. C'mon!
4. Rihanna is prettier when she wasn't pregnant - no one should even argue this.
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A fight broke out between a couple in my street;
Husband: All you know is "Money for Brazilian hair. Money for wig." No common sense!
Wife: Oga just say you don't have Money. Everything in your life is low; Salary low, IQ low. The only thing high in your life is your libido.
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Bro, yesterday in Church something came to mind! What if when God called you, like Samuel, in your childhood, you never responded so He made you bald so you will never forget the experience?💔
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You can't be using Glo Ng and still go to hell. It'll be a two-way loss. Using that network sometimes is like hell😭
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@AdemoyeJohn
@nikksterDotTech
6 months
105 applications (maybe more, losted count)
102 rejections
3 interviews
2 ghosted
1 peanut offer
"If you're going through hell, just keep going" - Winston Churchill
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Matthew 7:9
Would any of you who are fathers give your son a STONE when he asks for BREAD?
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In simple words, The goal is to stand beside a Yahoo Boy and still look fresher!
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See guys! God didn't take His time to create you on the Sixth day to be begging for Retweets to "eat her work"😭. You're God's most perfect creation bro😭!
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Can you proudly beat your chest to tell your future husband that you're still a virgin?
Jumoke tried it last week and ended up in her Father's apartment😧
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As an employee, one of your first concerns is to know how the company you work for generates revenue / stays afloat.
If you can't exactly pinpoint that, run away.
Everything no be salary package. Your career reputation is important too.
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You see everyone shouting"BTC dey rise" here and there but you don't understand why they're restlessly happy as such? Get in here!
Will try to break it down to as minimal as possible.
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Your boyfriend claims 2020 is his Year! ...but he is still commenting 5 times under 2k giveaway tweets
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Creativity is truly the father of innovation😂😂
These pics will surely crack you up. You can use them as wallpaper sef😂
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Queens prefer to spend their own money rather than begging for it
Queens aren't looking for guys who'll spoil them...rather, guys who'll value them for the Diamond they are
Queens assist their partner in anyway they can, instead of running him dry.
Are you a Queen?
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A generation that celebrates Artistes than real heroes...
...that sees sense in nonsense
...that sees Sex as a means of exchange
...that portrays Ladies as an instrument rather than a gender
Shey na like this we go dey dey😭?
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@COUNTRY_YOO
@preshdeyforyou
@gyae_me
Lol...you want a candid advice??
Have a network bro. You may not be too close to them...but SABI PEOPLE. No dey follow all these useless tweets oo. Na your network go recommend you if any opportunity show
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John: Okay if I agree to date you, what do you have to bring to the table?
Amaka:
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When they say "Blacks are the enemies of Blacks", we all sometimes find it difficult to believe. This video proves that statement. This is ALLEGEDLY what African kids in the Diaspora go through among their fellow American Blacks. Pls watch
#AfricanKids
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@feminist_co
Pls I'm genuinely curious. How did you spend
#2
,000,000 on a documentary? No vex oo...but how??? That needs serious explanation!
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@i_iyanz
@dr_greaty
@the_lopetee
Ma'am, not boasting or anything of that sort but I've Legit never done any of those things she listed.
I also have Friendzzz (emphasis on the zzz) that have never done that. So please, don't generalize.
Your circle isn't the whole world.
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Culture, Content, and Code.
This is Lagos.
This is
@base
.
This is Onchain Summer.
Proudly facilitated by
@base
&
@OnboardGlobal
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Guys let's have a little discussion on here.
If your babe mistakenly gets pregnant, would Abortion be the next thing on your mind?
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Scenes where you verify your address, and later get arrested right in your sitting room some months down the line because your account was found to have been involved with Crypto 💀
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I'm laughing so hard right now😂😂😂😂😂. If you don't understand Yoruba, I'm sorrrrryyy
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Guys, this Brand new iPhone 8 with all of its complete accessories & pack is going for 160k...nothing more, nothing less. Available for quick delivery to people in Lagos & Ogun state. DM if interested
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IRL > Virtual
We'll be going through the country (Nigeria) supporting builders physically as they hack & build for the Onchain Summer Buildathon.
Breakfast, Lunch & Internet expenses will be covered. Just Build!
Anyone is a Builder! Join us 👇
Based community meetups are coming to Lisbon, Singapore, NYC, Buenos Aires, and Nigeria
Lisbon | 6/7
Lagos | 6/9
Singapore | 6/12
NYC | 6/13
Buenos Aires | 6/15
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This is saddening! I asked my fellow NYSC members through my WhatsApp status to tell me their experiences with their boss at their various PPAs. This particular one made me sad
#NyscExperience
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There's nothing as sweet as a clean ride! 2006 Nissan Pathfinder for sale!! Price is
#850
,000. Pls comment below if seriously interested.
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How can you ask me "Can I injure you in bed like André Gomes"?
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If Cardi B were a Nigerian artiste, InstaBlog's caption of this interview will be like: "Popular Rap artiste wishes to join the long list of people with badluck". Those people no get joy😂
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Another day, another opportunity to create a long lasting First impression through how you look.
These footwears are here to make you do just that. Delivery Nationwide guaranteed. DM to secure one for yourself
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