Muchi
@Sipho_Says
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Please change your toothbrush | Writer | Award Winning Creator | Producer | VO Artist |🇿🇦🇿🇲[email protected]
Johannesburg, South Africa
Joined May 2009
J.Cole was so sincere with his ‘we the big 3’ line but that slam poet isn’t having any of it 😭.
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Can’t be smelling like mountain ranger blast when the good stuff is right there.
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Kana you’re laying right next to me as I tweet this. Yoh, what a life ❤️😭.
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Easily the best year of my life. I finally found my hearts twin ❤️
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Let’s stick to what we know guys. This is probably how Zimbabwe started to spiral via names. One day you’re Fungai, next you’re Thinkwell.
Guys it’s 2025 we can’t still be naming our kids bo Tshegofatso, Lerato, Thabo. Let’s be creative bathong.
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I wonder who’s tipping them off? They’re on an incredible canary run 😭 I suspect the air hostess just points out the people who didn’t eat or drink the entire flight 🤔.
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And me in mind when he made you 🌸.
God had me in mind when he made music. 😭♥️.
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Dagga? Nice try Constable.
Who sells dagga in the Bryanston area? I don't need much. Just two blunts of that regular degular (please don't tell me ka di blueberry cheese).
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She’s currently fast asleep next to me. Being flawless is hard work 😍🤌🏾.
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It’s sinus season my boi, yoh! Nkum nkum gang where y’all at? Share some relief tips please 😩🙏🏽.
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01:07 just got interrogated about why I’ve moved my leg away from hers in bed.
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I onced yelled 'please participate!' During sex when she was on top doing absolutely nothing.
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Fixed it 🤝🏾.
Mmmmm, this thing of me paying rent here and my girl paying rent there is not making sense. One house is always empty.
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This is one of the worst pictures in history.
Royal AM players are reportedly seeking to terminate their contracts with the club to explore opportunities with new teams during the January transfer window.
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Nkare ne a feta a ba bona go nale lenyalo.
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My aunt came to pray for my new home. My heart is so full today.
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I never cared much for YouTube Premium until Neo was at my house one time and saw ads while watching and asked me ‘haona seventy ranta bafanas?’ 😔.
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My masculinity doesn't stand a chance against Destiny Child's Say My Name and Long Way To go by Cassie. Reply with your truth fellas, this is a safe place.
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‘O ska tena batho’ is an important life lesson.
Sucks when a tweet that is absolutely true gets deleted cause of backlash. She was cooking here
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Definitely dating my best friend. What an entertaining human 😂❤️.
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This girl just asked me if I’d still love her if she was never born. Jolang.
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Please be a reliable person. Do that thing you said you do and do it well. Please.
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Yho, I hate it when they’re responsible.
Second episode of "I Blew It" is very underwhelming. This woman fixed her childhood home and took care of her family.
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For half this price you can pay me to come and count your steps.
Pre-order new Apple Watch Ultra from R18 999 now. Available from 30 September. The ultimate sport watch. T&Cs apply. Pre-order now:
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Yoh, being in love is so nice! Like, this person is all mine? Nah, God snapped with this human ❤️.
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Time to become a parent because I wish a motherfucker would ask me to buy pine gel for school. I mean, I’ll love and raise my children and all that but, my main plan is to go to war with schools.
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Yoh guys, God is real. I cannot believe what he is doing in my life 🙏🏽.
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Ha se ka relaxer mo tlung ke kom kyk.
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These niggas look up to Penuel and Nota. Please proceed with caution.
cheat on me w a basic bitch & imma fck w a nigga you look up to😆.
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Taking Wendy to Mafikeng for the first time this weekend to meet my parents. It’s their tombstone unveiling so they better send my baby good vibes. Personally I have no doubt that they would have adored her. She’s easily the best person to ever exist.
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I was supposed to do an unboxing but my helper unboxed and packed things away. I’m so defeated 😩😂.
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Being called jealous for calling out corruption, especially by young people, will always be wild to me. Are you people drunk?.
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We need schools to open urgently.
how come we never had a lockdown for hiv?.
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One thing about me? I’m going to lift his name up high and say thank you Jesus.
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I’m thinking of getting stricter and saying even if they have speakers. Spur is also on thin ice with the whole happy birthday performance.
I’ve officially decided I don’t wanna eat at any restaurant with a DJ.
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I’m sure when you’re jogging it asks you ‘o jagetse kae?’.
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None of these braai places on these delivery apps are worth it. One piece of chicken, wors and steak for R300? That’s flag money.
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Booooooooring! I’m pulling up to your birthday and blowing out your candles. You wish you could wish.
A failed relationship doesn't make y'all enemies. 🙃.
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So many answered prayers lately and I’m just so grateful. I take nothing for granted.
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Ramaphosa must just give us 24hrs to restock alcohol and get married cause I’m not doing this shit alone again.
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I have some questions but all of them are pretty much hating on an 8 year old.
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Baaaaaaaaaaaby! This is the best thing ever 😍😍😍😍😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️.
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Congratulations on getting 7 friends to all commit. Usually only like 3 make it 🙏🏾.
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Re appreciatile mara guys, were we supposed to tattoo JERUSALEMA across our chests? Yuh.ha.a.
White people in Europe had to like Jerusalema first before South Africans could appreciate the song.
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I remember the ‘94 lootings in Mafikeng. My mom looted hair products only 😩 when I tell you I was rocking S-curl and cut for a whole year as a child 😭.
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It’s the 10th? Yoh, October is tryna get outta here. Merry Christmas everyone.
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This cover is crazier when you remember the music that comes with it.
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I remember winter mornings in high school. Standing outside, catching some sun between classes. Somebody getting roasted, a simpler time.
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You’re at KFC and Patrice Motsepe walks in and also orders dunked wings. BOOM BUSINESS DEAL.
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And Bonang said he must apologise across all platforms. If he doesn’t have LinkedIn he must open one tonight and post there too 💔.
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Even the hitmen Rosemary Ndlovu hired were shocked at some of their assignments. When INKABI have to report you to the police cause you’re bad vibes? Yoh.
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No DNA just RSA-O 🙏🏽.
TITBIT:. Chidimma Adetshina leads Miss Universe Nigeria. 7712 votes at the time of this post, Chidimma is ahead of Edeifo Aikhuele who has 7012. Fortune Kuroro is 3rd with 3265 votes. At R3 per vote, Chidimma has made the pageant over R25 000. That’s around 2,2-million Nairas.
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If you see me at KFC on one knee then please start recording. I'm begging you.
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'arrg wena Jay-Z, everyday ke hip-hopo'.
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Just carry your own sanitiser, these guys are spraying us with vinegar now 😒.
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Tshaba di mukbang.
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Yah, they must stick to stuff like this and leave the instant Mogodu.
Fair play to whichever sadistic genius at Woolworths HQ who came up with these.
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I don’t hesitate to lodge a complaint on food delivery apps. You will refund me R17.99 I’m not lazy.
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“You have such a small penis”. Well, maybe if you recycled once in a while we wouldn’t be here Nthabiseng.
Human penises are shrinking because of pollution, warns scientist
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It’s December in Botswana 😭😭.
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I won’t lie, I’m not happy for you.
Virtual Graduation 2021 . I have successfully completed the Master of Business Administration with MANCOSA.
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Oh Chidmma, now they’re going to make your family an example. What an unexpected twist 😩.
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Of all the things I’ve lost during this pandemic, my faith in God is not one of them. My redeemer lives ❤️.
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And I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a 4yr old play sports but they are not good at things.
So wait, parents, you have to wake up early on Saturday morning to go watch your children play sports at their schools?.
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Mmmmm, this thing of me paying rent here and my girl paying rent there is not making sense. One house is always empty.
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Middle aged black women on holiday is my favourite thing to see at an airport. You damn right there’s a theme 🤣🙌🏾.
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Guys, please go out and date. I know the dating culture in this country is tricky but please date. These social media apps got all us looking stupid and insecure but fuck it. Give love a chance. Shoot your shot, give that intro or extrovert a chance. If it fails whatevs man.
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White people talk about Apartheid like it was just this one day when they were all in a bad mood.
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He can go to hell.
The President looks exhausted or sick. 😭☹️.I hope he’s okay.
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My favourite Sizwe story is when he told us that he has never gotten a headache before. Since birth, not once.
Sizwe Dhlomo just speculates about the world, no articles, just him being sure about stuff.
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Why stop there? Soon they’ll just give us the code and we must build our own iOS.
Apple is no longer including headphones or a power adapter in the iPhone box, but it will still come with a USB-C power cord. That results in a box that’s also smaller. #appleevent
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Another trip around the sun, thank you all for the birthday love ❤️🙏🏽
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