Sammy Reid
@SammyReidFI
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Following
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Host of the Reid ‘em And Weep poker pod. Crusty NL reg. A fish on the Gillcast @rotogrinders . 2x FSWA award winner. Burrito connoisseur. Manzcoin hodler.
Cali
Joined November 2012
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Pinned Tweet
Career
Win%
Brady - .781
Garoppolo - 1.000
TD/INT ratio
Brady - 3.1
Garapollo - 3.5
Yards per att
Brady - 7.5
Garapollo - 8.0
QB rating
Brady - 97.8
Garapollo - 100.4
Super Bowl Titles
Brady - 5 in 17 seasons (29%)
Garopollo - 2 in 3 seasons (67%)
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BREAKING: The city of Denver has agreed to re-criminalize marijuana to accommodate Russell Wilson
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As a Padres fan, having Juan Soto for a year felt like hooking up with an unattainable woman
You can’t believe she’s with you, but then of course she leaves you and a year later you find she’s with some chiseled, rich Chad and they’re bout to get engaged
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Oh dear lord somebody call the police Justin Verlander just killed a man in cold blood
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@RotoSurgeon
Dear lord I would tilt so hard if some dude in a DMont jersey came griddying past me during my darkest moment lmaooooo
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Things Madden players have been doing for the last decade that are now considered revolutionary in the NFL:
*Passing a ton
*Play-action a lot
*Going for it on 4th-and-short
*Moving
#1
WR around, esp into slot
*Running out of spread > heavy sets
*Making WRs and RBs interchangable
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me during sex: hurt me
her: the Padres traded Anthony Rizzo for Andrew Cashner
me: wait
her: the Padres traded Corey Kluber for Ryan Ludwick
me: stop
her: Padres spent $144M on Eric Hosmer
me: wtf
her: Pads got swept in the WS when you had tix to Gm 5
me: OK TOO F'ING FAR
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You don’t take away eligibility from a player mid-season. For example, Gronk has maintained his TE eligibility despite playing right tackle all year, this is no different
On Jaylen Samuels:
He's had RB/TE eligibility all season. If we remove TE eligibility today, it would not take effect until this evening, after most claims had been made. We felt it was not fair to change so late in the day or season.
Samuels will remain an RB/TE in our game.
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Blake Snell
ERA
‘18: 1.89
‘19: 5.01
K%
‘18: 31.6%
‘19: 31.7%
BB%
‘18: 9.1%
‘19: 8.8%
Swinging Strike %
‘18: 15.1%
‘19: 18.0%
1st-pitch Strike%
‘18: 57.1%
‘19: 67.4%
Contact % allowed
‘18: 66.7%
‘19: 62.0%
Skill-interactive ERA
‘18: 3.30
‘19: 3.56
xFIP:
‘18: 3.16
‘19: 3.19
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The same people who are verrrry proud to not be afraid of a 1 in 100 chance of dying are suddenly verrrry concerned about a 1 in a 1,000,000 chance of blood clots
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Presented without commentary: Brian Dozier just stole 2nd with a four run lead in the 9th
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When someone else wins my fantasy football leagues, it was just variance. When I win, it was skill and shrewd moves.
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Things I accomplished in ‘19:
POKER
Moved up to 2/5
Won $40K
FANTASY
Won the FSWA award for best football series
Won the Fantasy Pentathlon
Won 2nd straight BARF football title
Made
#SFB9
playoffs
Played the NFBC ME for the 1st time
IRL
Became a dad to Layla Reid on Thurs ♥️
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Remember how Michael Thomas *averaged* 123 receptions per year over his first 4 seasons and was the top WR in fantasy and then someone called him Slantboy on Twitter and he sprained an ankle and his career became insta-dust? The NFL is wild man.
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Le'Veon Bell paid $800k to prove that he's a replaceable asset. Shrewd move
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If any other sport had a 19-year old wunderkind who came up and immediately dominated for one of the league's best teams, everyone and their mother would know about him. Commercials would be made. Jerseys would be sold.
Meanwhile only hardcore baseball fans know who Juan Soto is
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Booger: “Jalen Ramsey needs to figure out if he wants to be in Jacksonville or not”
Boogs, he figured it out. That’s literally the news
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Quarantine update, Day 154:
Just dumped a pack of M&Ms into my mask at work and now I’m slowly eating them like a horse
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A big regret I’m having is not getting a haircut before lockdown
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When I was 19, I lived with a 4-foot bong in my closet and fell asleep drunk on San Diego beaches twice a week
At 19, Juan Soto is batting .301/.415./549 with 30 walks against 34 strikeouts against Major League pitching
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Pennhurst Insane Asylum escapee apprehended at Oakland Coliseum
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People who think weed is bad but alcohol is fine are bottom-5 percentile critical thinkers
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Right after getting laid off (yay corporate America) and going back to poker full-time (temporarily), had my highest-ever netting month of live poker in November. Feeling blessed by the Poker Gods, the universe, and of course, the
#Manzcoin
🙏🏼
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I’ve made the tough decision to cancel my trip to Vegas for the NFBC Main Event (will still be participating via online draft).
Some may call me a pussy but I request that you keep in mind that I don’t give a fuck what you think.
Def gonna miss seeing all my pals out there.
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Felt straight after the 2nd vaccine shot but told my wife I was feeling bad so I could chill on the couch and play online poker all day and not do any chores. Damn it feels good to be a gangsta
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Before/After haircuts
A McCutchen before: .883 OPS, 1 MVP
A McCutchen after: .834 OPS, 0 MVPs
J Giambi before: .957 OPS, 1 MVP
J Giambi after: .880 OPS, 0 MVPs
J Damon before: 2x allstar
J Damon after: 0x allstar
M Bumgarner before: 3 WS titles
M Bumgarner after: 0 WS titles
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Me telling my wife that I’m watching football every single day from here on out:
With the NFL's amended schedule, we now have games tomorrow, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday.
8 of the next 10 days have NFL games.
Buckle up.
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Imagine believing anyone but Ohtani was the AL ROY
He hit a ball 113.9 mph, harder than Javy Baez
He hit a ball 449 ft, farther than JD Martinez
He threw a ball 101.9 mph, harder than Max Scherzer
He ran 28.4 ft/sec, faster than Mookie Betts
What he did was rare, and special
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2018 - Pittsburgh trades Martavis Bryant to Oakland for a 3rd round pick
2019 - Pittsburgh trades Antonio Brown to the Raiders for a 3rd and 5th round pick
2020 (projected) - Pittsburgh trades a tub of Hepatitis type C to Oakland for a 2nd and 4th round pick
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Recently, the Cardinals have:
Allowed Mike Matheny to coach them for multiple seasons
Allowed Bud Norris to harrass Jordan Hicks
Benched Jose Martinez
Left CarMart on the mound after his velocity dropped precipitously
Traded Tommy Pham for magic beans
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Read this.
Yesterday, my wife was laid off by her small-business employer and we’re losing her insurance for both her and my 10-week old daughter.
The reality is this: Our country can never be truly great until we put the health of US citizens above corporation profit margins.
While the impending economic devastation from COVID-19 is obvious, there’s a side effect that may be getting overlooked: As many get laid off, Americans are about to learn how irrational & irresponsible it is for so many to be dependent on employers for health insurance. (1/9)
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Don’t even have a concrete take on student debt relief (still need to know more about how it would work) but please for the love of God get these out of touch back-in-my-day boomer tweets about how they paid off their debt “with hard work and living within their means” off my TL
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“It was right there and then that Carlos Beltran decided that he would never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever allow himself to be surprised by a pitch again”
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"And they said Zero RB is dead!", the man said, laughing maniacally. He submitted Austin Ekeler, Jaylen Samuels, and Spencer Ware into his Week 14 lineup for his 4-9 team and logged onto Twitter to take his victory lap
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Texas bothered that Tatis swung 3-0 and smashed a granny up 6 runs. Clubhouse leader Eric Hosmer gets in his ear about it.
Did they not see the A’s come back from 5 runs down in the 9th on the Giants the other night? Can we get rid of these stupid unwritten rules?
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Lord forgive me for posting a bathroom mirror selfie on Twitter but, what has 2 thumbs and made it to Day 3 of the
#WSOPMainEvent
?
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RE: MIL -
You don't trade for Moustakas or Schoop to have them sit on the bench. Shaw has to play. So the only thing to do is Shaw 2B, Schoop SS, Moose 3B, which is basically how I'd build an MLB The Show team
MIL going all RP + bats, screw SP and defense.
LEROOOYYYY JENKINS
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League-wide wRC+ by position:
DH: 107
1B: 106
3B: 103
OF: 101
SS: 99
2B: 92
C: 86
----------------
P: -24
There's the line
@SammyReidFI
Counterpoints:
Catchers are obscenely bad at hitting too (except 3 of them). Should we have 2 DHs?
Shortstops were terrible for a while. Should they have a DH?
Basically what is the line for terrible that necessitates a DH?
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“I played Driskel in cash ... but I didn’t use the savings on CMC”
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If owners make more money and pay their employees the same during good times, they should make less money and pay their employees the same during bad times
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Gonna be a real sad story if we find out he was smashing Kyle Pitts touchdown props
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Folks who drafted Wyatt Langford when Mike Trout was still on the board
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My OCD going crazy that Freddy Peralta didn’t get one more out
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The Mookie Betts situation is so sad.
He should be a life long Red Sox player and hall of famer.
He could have his number retired with the Red Sox.
Instead the Sox want to cry poor and not pay him what he’s worth, even tho they are rich af.
It’s genuinely a shame.
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My whole TL laughing about this - but this shit isn’t funny.
This man poses no threat to anyone, and some peaked-in-high-school uniform sees the opportunity to physically assault him without repercussion - and takes it. Happens every day in our country.
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Her: Let’s spend the rest of our lives together
Me: I’d like that
Her: Let’s spend our life savings on this house
Me: Let’s do it
Her: Let’s bring a child into this world
Me: I’m down
Her: Let’s turn our read receipts on for each other
Me: You’re out of your goddamn mind
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Tough break for the Steelers with Mason Rudolph escaping suspension
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The thing about the MLB labor dispute is that it’s a microcosm of what’s happening all over our country: Stagnant wages while profits for those at the top rise; this just has more zeros
Siding w owners is Stockholm Syndrome. Ya been brainwashed to believe you don’t deserve more
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6:00 PST: Pats are unstoppable
6:03 PST: Kareem Hunt is awful
6:07 PST: Pats are so stupid
6:10 PST: Kareem Hunt is good
6:14 PST: Pats suck
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Phillies scouting report on Darvish: WATCH OUT FOR BREAKING BALLS IN 2-STRIKE COUNTS
Darvish:
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There are currently 6 qualified major leaguers who are batting .300+/.400+/.500+:
Cody Bellinger
Anthony Rendon
Christian Yelich
Austin Meadows
Jorge Polanco
Juan Soto
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Been on Twitter for like 5 mins today and seen George Floyd be murdered in cold blood by the police and the callous greed of MLB owners threatening to sink the baseball season. Plus the normal shit like the incels who think freedom = not wearing a mask. Fuck this, I’m logging off
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God help me if I ever get bodied on the internet like this
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Us celebrating people cashing multiple beers in a matter of seconds while thousands toil in prison for marijuana charges will be one of the true WTF moments for future generations
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Took a tough beat yesterday - bet the over on Deebo’s 22.5 rush yds and only missed it by 31.5 yds
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Me trying to pick the right week to roster Mike Evans or Chris Godwin
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I finished Tiger King. Honestly don’t get why it’s such a thing; Obv we like to watch ridiculousness that you couldn’t even make up, but these are all horrible people. To me there’s no protagonist to rooting for, certainly not polygamist cradle-robbing animal abusing Joe Exotic
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Imagine tweeting about how you willingly deprive yourself of experiencing awesome things like The Masters or GoT, and thinking doing so makes you cool and special
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“SB Squares are for squares” he chuckled to himself as he placed his bet for Kyle Juszczyk to score a touchdown at +600
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Seldomly do you see someone fuck around so hard and find out so swiftly
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ATTN: FRIENDS OF
@YancyEaton
He and his fam evacuated from Ft Myers and are safe and well. A lot of people have tried to reach out and he has barely any cell reception so can’t respond. But he wanted me to let everyone know he’s ok ✌🏼✌🏼
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So we really drafting a timeshare RB on a Jared Goff-led offense that has a 5-win Vegas total … in the 3rd round?
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Colin Kaepernick brought awareness to racial injustice on a massive scale, spent the past couple years doing charity work, donated $1M+ to help people, doesn’t have to risk CTE, and is set $-wise for life
Btw he also has a higher career passer rating and more YPC than Cam Newton
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You spelled "crater" wrong
Getting hit by Aroldis Chapman in the ribs leaves a mark.
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People who poo-poo on fantasy awards should just keep their grinchiness to themselves - no one cares that you don’t care
The reality is that there’s so much good work out there done by ppl who mostly don’t get paid a lot to do it, and getting recognition can make it all worth it
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Byron Buxton and Carlos Correa collecting their paychecks in 2028
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Wait til they get a load of
@evansilva
They are literally attacking one of the impeachment witnesses for.......drinking water
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ML hitters with 20+ HR, 10+ SB, and 90+ BB:
Mike Trout
Bryce Harper
Jose Ramirez
Alex Bregman
Aaron Hicks
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Our president lied to us about COVID-19, which is killing masses of people who followed his “it’s just a flu” advice
Our healthcare is tied to employment and everyone’s getting laid off
Our only choice for next president is between two sexual assaulters
This isn’t April Fools.
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Nah I bet the under on all your seasonal props and now I’m rich
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Taysom Hill: <gets called short of the goal line>
Sean Payton:
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He did his job unconventionally and he ran his mouth constantly, but never actually accomplished anything. Future generations won’t understand how crazy, fun, and frankly bizarre it was to see him do his job on a daily basis. Dadgum it we’re gonna miss you, Phil Rivers.
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Me when I’m hoping a player makes it to me in the draft: “Plzplzplzplzplzplzplzplzplzzzzzz make it to me!!!”
Me when he finally makes it: “Hmmm but if I take someone else here, maybe he’ll make it back to me next round”
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