I'm blown away by the kindness and good wishes on this news - THANK YOU all.
There are so many wonderful people/organisations I'd like to highlight, so I'll write more next week when I can.
But THANK YOU for helping to make this very special.
It's
#WinnieThePoohDay
Pooh:"Today was a Difficult Day"
Piglet: "Difficult Days are so much easier when you know you've got someone there for you. And I'll always be here for you, Pooh."
We all have "Difficult Days".
We all need someone to sit with us on a "Difficult Day"
I take these everyday, with my first (of many) cup of tea!
They help me manage my mental ill-health, esp anxiety which at it's worst had me in dark and desperate places.
While it's not for everyone, no one should should ever be shamed for taking medication to keep them well!
Since being sent home on Friday almost half of the class have got positive PCR tests for COVID.
Some have symptoms, some don't.
They were in school together for 4 1/2 days!
I imagine this is being replicated across many classes and many schools and will continue to be.
🎉We did it! 🎉
I cried as we met this morning!
THANK YOU
@RobinSwannMoH
for the news of
#SpecialistPerinatalNI
FUNDING for teams in EVERY TRUST below👇
As a mum with lived experience I've given my all to this for 5 yrs - I'm emotional & excited!
These can & will save lives.
To whom it may concern:
I am my own woman.
Always have been, always will be.
I speak for myself (no one else) & don't need permission to do so.
Leave me out of the games.
Your misogyny is rampant but thankfully this isn't my first rodeo and, so far, I've always survived.
Last night I shared a photo of my husband with our son (10 yrs old) who was excited to watch football.
I'm not a big fan of the sport but his love of it seems pretty normal to me.
Some of the nasty, hate-filled responses to it are anything but normal.
Sort yourselves out.
Following an emergency situation this weekend
@GRobinsonDUP
had successful spinal surgery today. He's in good spirits!
Weeks of recovery now ahead - Reuben has Monopoly plans for it!
Thanks to all who have held and supported us these difficult months, weeks, days and hours.
What the actual?
I don't care two figs who you are, this behaviour is utterly reprehensible, from two grown men.
Guys, my 7 year old knows better than this.
Thank you
@RobinSwannMoH
for your continual hard work and genuine leadership over such a challenging 18 months.
Specialist Perinatal Mental Health Services Save Lives
Specialist Perinatal Mental Health Services Save Lives
Specialist Perinatal Mental Health Services Save Lives
Mum & families in NI need and deserve these.
I will continue to do all I can do support implementation ASAP.
❗The absolute darkness and despair of a severe perinatal mental illness is something you're unlikely to comprehend, unless you've walked a similar path.
It is complex, heartbreaking and life changing for all involved.
Please remember that.
Especially if speculating. ❗
He's home!
Reuben and I are so relieved to have him back.
We are so very very thankful to all who have been in touch via social media, email, message, phone or at the door step.
Also a HUGE THANKS to the wonderful staff and medical teams at the Ulster & Royal Hospitals.
Absolutely appalling and disgusting abuse directed at
@naomi_long
last night.
My 8 year old knows exactly what that type of pile on is - bullying and nasty behaviour.
Thank you, Naomi, for your dedication to your role and to public service.
Stay strong. Stand strong.
These two peas in a pod have my back and my heart!
R: "Mummy why have you been upset a lot?"
M: "Sometimes people can be unkind and that hurts."
R: "That's not allowed. I'll ask my Teacher to talk to Mr B (School Principal) today, he knows what to do about unkindness!"
I turned 39 today!
I'm thankful for life.
I'm thankful to be alive today.
I'm thankful for all those who make life worth living.
Here's to you all!
Hold onto hope people.
There is always hope.
Tonight I hold in the light:
Those who weep, grieve and mourn.
Those whose pain is too great for words.
Those who have no idea how to face tomorrow and for whom any comfort seems impossible right now.
Those who feel that the light is lost and that hope evades them.
Those...
I'll always have his back!
He knows little personally of the very worst of social media. As he's 10, we know that won't last long.
Protecting him is my/our job.
Going forward, I'll happily share parts of our family life but I'll draw a line in sand every time I need to.
Last weekend I accepted that my mental health is struggling, and I once again need help.
Despite being so open about my struggle with mental illness in the past, this time I considered holding back & saying nothing but here goes...
Thank you for the kindness as I've shared that my mental health, once again, isn't in the best shape.
Even though I've done so before, it's never easy to be vulnerable publicly, especially online.
I've got good support and I'm holding onto hope knowing brighter days are ahead.
We've let him back out into the world
(only small, first steps though as it's still early days)
for a Friday afternoon coffee/hot chocolate!
It's always a treat to spend time with these two peas in a pod but, after last weekend, this time feels extra special. 💜
Politics isn't my natural or favourite space but I know it's an absolute privilege to serve, so thank you!
We've learned so much over the last 9 years, through both challenges and opportunities.
Whatever this next chapter holds, we'll face it as we always have - together!
Happy Christmas🎄
Thank you for continuing to support the work of Have you seen that girl?
We also really appreciate your kindness to us as a family during very difficult months this year and we realise this season has been hard for so many too.
Love, light and hope to all!
Yes, Yes, Yes!
I've just received this from
@RobinSwannMoH
Private Office!
The Mental Health Action Plan is published and it includes
#PERINATAL
#MENTALHEALTH
.
I can't explain how this feels!
We've work still do to but FINALLY we're on the right road!
#EveryonesBusiness
Thank you to the person who found my handbag hanging on a trolley in Asda Dundonald (I know, 🙈) and handed it into the store - you made my day!
I know our community spirit in NI is strong but in my panic I thought we'd never be reunited.
Thank you for proving me wrong!
Belfast, you're looking good.
Turns out, some days it is possible to feel and also be 'on top of the world'!
We decided, after challenging circumstances last year, to commit to being more active/outdoors more often, while enjoying spending time together.
We're loving it!
I've been floored today by news of a fellow traveller and the end of their life journey, who also battled mental illness.
I cannot say this loudly enough :
You are loved.
Your life matters.
You are more than enough.
This world needs you.
Please, please ask for help.
I'm feeling absolutely dreadful with COVID.
Two dudes not so bad, thankfully.
I'm genuinely shocked to hear of adults here, by choice (not necessity) who still refuse the vaccine.
We all deserve better.
This doesn't just impact you.
Please rethink and take responsibility.
If you've never been in a position leading to abortion:
be very slow to speak,
even slower (better not at all) to offer personal critique to those who have,
and never condemnation.
*This applies to other areas and circumstances too*
I'm getting weary of armchair amateurs.
📢Personal news to share 📢
I've been quieter recently, as I work through things about my mental health and work future.
* I remain committed to and passionate about mental health and wellbeing for all. *
But here's where I have landed and why...
Maybe it's because I'm feeling yuck but too often I also feel utterly sick at this place.
Stop it.
Stop bickering, stop show boating, stop trying to play the better person, stop blaming & shaming.
In no other work place would this be allowed.
Just get on with the job(s).
Note to my 14 year old self:
Dreams DO come true!
And they are worth the wait, especially as you get to share them with these two dudes.
Thank you
@garthbrooks
(and
@CrokePark
for hosting this ABSOLUTE LEGEND) - we are ready for you!
#CountryGal
Gosh it's been a hard few months.
I've been whispering it but I think my
#mentalhealth
is finally on the up!
I'm eating and sleeping better.
I'm not as easily agitated or constantly anxious.
Daily life doesn't feel overwhelming.
Here's, hopefully, to better days ahead!
Anxiety had me awake last night.
So I'm feeling under the weather this morning.
BUT I'm having a cup of tea in the fresh air (and rain) then I'm heading get the train as my oldest friend gets married today!
I won't let this or them beat me!
Not today boys.
I turned 38 today! As usual this wee dude stole the show & my heart!
I always find myself emotional on my birthday, since battling mental illness.
I’m aware of many occasions that mean I might not have been here to celebrate!
But I am. For that I'm so very thankful.
#Hope
Thank you for all the support - public & private.
I'm bruised (aren't so many of us by now?) but determined to be brave, made easier with you all behind me.
I make no apologies - THIS IS ME!
(Yes. I might have been listening to a certain "Greatest Showman" track on repeat!)
To whom it may concern:
I am my own woman.
Always have been, always will be.
I speak for myself (no one else) & don't need permission to do so.
Leave me out of the games.
Your misogyny is rampant but thankfully this isn't my first rodeo and, so far, I've always survived.
It's the first time in 2 1/2 weeks (since COVID hit) that we are all out of the house together, for couple of hours!
Hair cuts - Gavin & Reuben.
Kids club - Reuben.
A drive, car wash and a coffee date - Gavin & I.
Sofa and movie this afternoon for us all!
#CovidRecovery
Another day...
There were only 9 in Reuben's class yesterday (out of 28) as the others were off with positive tests.
This little dude has decided he wants to take a mask to wear in school to help "protect people".
He's feeling fine (physically) but this takes it's toll...
My mental health has taken a nose dive these past couple of weeks.
I'm thankful to my wonderful GP for excellent support and the opportunity to step back from things, to create space to get well.
It's a busy season in our household but my mental health is also our priority.
What a week!
I'm thankful to the many faithful friends who continue to remind me to just be me.
I mean, I don't know how (or want) to be anyone else these days but still...
This dude (and the other two in the house) keep me going and provide many cuddles.
It's all good.
Tonight I hold in the light:
Those whose pain is too much for words.
Those who have no idea how to face tomorrow.
Those who are fighting unknown, unseen or unspoken battles.
Those for whom rest does not come.
Those who are weary and worn out with this world.
Those...
"I HATE stinking COVID, Mummy"
Only 5 days back and the whole class is off and need PCR tests. (Other classes too).
There's been lots of tears and fears.
I do genuinely worry and wonder what this term will be like for our children and YP.
And, of course, all school staff!
Recently I've made decisions that put the wellbeing of the 3 of us (as individuals and as a family) before other opportunities.
This is a just a reminder that it's absolutely ok, often vital, for us each to do so.
We should also not feel guilty about it.
I'm feeling so disappointed, angry and also vulnerable, despite any tough talk!
Nasty tactics, bullying, misogyny and more seem to have won the day.
I know my feelings don't compare to those of many others/communities in NI as they look ahead.
Can we hold onto hope together?
My loves, my world 💜
These two are best buds - either up to mischief together or bickering!
They're also often found gathered around my very last nerve!
No matter what they're fiercely in each other's corner and I wouldn't want it any other way.
#FathersDay
#FatherandSon
"Oh. So you *still* take the tablets?"
Yes. Yes, I do. Everyday.
These allow me to enjoy life not just endure it.
To pursue ways to thrive not merely survive.
I'm thankful for them.
#NoblameNoShame
#MentalHealth
(This medication must be prescribed by GP/HCP).
The crying has stopped (for now!) the dancing has begun!
Thank you for all your lovely messages and comments on the news of
#SpecialistPerinatalNI
today.
Reuben is just as excited as I am!
We're delighted all mums will now get help when they need it!
These two are away this weekend - Reuben's 1st rugby team tour!
I've only been apart from *both* of them (for 2 whole nights), on one other occasion.
After triple checking Calpol was packed, I anxiously waved them off.
Duke and I are at Granny's for our own adventure...
1 in 3 women have abortions and that also includes women who are part of churches.
Thank you
@KellieTurtle
for speaking up for the experience of women and leaving the conversation with light and love, to all who need to hear they are valued.
Nothing prepared me for maternal mental illness, which (among other things) told me this amazing little dude did not belong to me, or the years of trauma that ensued.
Recovery is continual but the experience left a mark.
However he always has my heart and I his.
#Hope
🎉 Eight. He's EIGHT! 🎂
"Today's the best day of your life, isn't it, Mummy? 'Cos you got me."
Oh, it is my boy. It absolutely is.
Run on perinatal mental illness, you have no authority here!
I love this dude.
He is my world.
And, at 8, I'm still his!
Reuben (age 8) told me on Thursday he's feeling "very un-confident" (his words) about everything because of Omicron.
I listened and then we chatted.
Let's not be in any doubt that COVID is impacting our C&YP, in ways that many of them can't express or acknowledge, as yet.
I. DO. NOT. HAVE. THE. WORDS.
To those who have rolled in behind, saying or doing nothing privately or publicly, you are just as responsible in my mind.
I stayed out of public party politics until they came for me, to bullying and silence.
No more.
We all deserve better.
This week was 'back to school' for *both* Reuben and I!
He began P5 and I started a new job as a SEN Classroom Assistant in another wonderful local Primary School.
We both had a great week. I'm so thankful for this opportunity and new season!
Read more
The last few days have caught up with me.
I'm absolutely shattered.
I haven't yet seen all your messages, emails and comments. I'm sorry. But thank you.
I'm signing off for tonight as I need all my energy (& mental health) for Maternal Mental Health week.
Back tomorrow!
COVID has been really rough.
We (adults) are still unwell (Reuben good) and a full recovery will take time.
I'm glad we haven't been allowed out - sometimes we could barely get out of bed and have had to take turns to rest.
COVID is real people.
Please get vaccinated.
This year is our 9th Christmas.
My smile is real AND I *still* struggle with mental ill health.
I've learned to live, in fact to thrive, alongside it.
It does not define me.
I know I'm not alone and that looking after my mental health matters.
I also adore this dude!
I'll admit I'm feeling the pressure to run and hide; to say nothing; to stay silent; to appear easy going, polite and the "good girl" (at least publicly - those who know me well know that's not me in private); to "know my place" in the background.
But I also know this is true👇
This week we'll most probably all meet people who will be trying their best to hold it together or not fall apart, no matter how well they hide it.
Let's be kind.
Responding to a survey by
@herloyalvoice
@BeattieDoug
reflects that loyalist women are some of most socially liberal and forward thinking within our society, with 98% being pro-choice - he promises reach out, listen, engage and take forward their issues and concern.
Changes start with challenges. Party Leader Doug Beattie MC MLA responds to
@herloyalvoice
survey of loyalist women and commits to building confidence and engaging with those in the community as the new leader of the UUP.
#UlsterUnionist
@BeattieDoug
The NI Assembly meet to discuss our Schools & COVID today.
As a parent, I'm not interested in hearing 'tit for tat' type conversation, blame games or political posturing from ANY Party or Member.
That only serves YOU not Schools.
Let's see collective ACTION.
We're waiting.
Wow☺️
What lovely encouragement for the work I do via Have you seen that girl? for
#MaternalMentalHealth
!
Thanks to whoever nominated me for this
@ndawards
!
This has really made my day! 🎉
Comment carefully.
Tread tenderly.
Lives are precious.
People are weary, wounded and often in worlds of pain we know little of.
Just because something could be said doesn't mean it should be said, right here, right now in this time, space and app.
*Lessons I'm learning*
I still get asked this!
Unless the person is your close friend *and* you have a mutual agreement to have conversations about your reproductive life then don't.
Never. Ever.
You don't need to know.
And we likely don't want to talk to you about it or tell you anything.
This was our first Christmas.
Despite the smile it was so hard.
I was battling perinatal mental illness.
To any other mama who is struggling:
You are loved.
Your life matters.
You are not alone.
You deserve support.
There is help and hope.
I find it really sad that (in many cases) the Church looks less and less like Jesus, with each passing week.
For those who leave, it's not about "falling away" but "getting away" from damaging behaviours and toxic theology.
Note - I haven't said *all* Christians or Churches.
People are not leaving the Church because they've "fallen away," people are leaving because all too often the Church has become a safer place for conspiracy theories, white supremacy, homophobia, and patriarchy than it is for the radical and subversive teachings of Jesus.
Just back from a (non emergency) pick up at the Ulster Hospital.
Shocked by the number of ambulances waiting in line.
Thanks to all our medical staff, across all sites and locations, for their continual dedicated work.
I feel utterly weary with the world (and many in it) atm, to be honest.
Tonight we are having cheesy beans on toast for tea. (Yay and yum!)
It's a regular 'survival tea' in our house.
Nutty crust for the two dudes, GF bread for me.
I will also add tomato ketchup to mine!
These two 💜
What a boy. What a Dad!
R: "Mummy before I give Daddy his card, I don't want you to be upset... "
Me: "Why would I be?"
R: "I've written 'No.1 Dad' because it's Father's Day. But you are my No.1 girl"
I've assured him there's space at 1st place for us both!
Agh.
I hate it when inappropriate behaviour gets blamed on 'mental ill-health'.
Let's not. It's stigmatising.
I struggle and the person most impacted, when I'm in a bad place, by what I do or say, is me.
I do not treat others with contempt or consider it a licence to do so.
Finally!! After MANY years of campaigning & many voices we now have commitment in NI to Specialist
#Perinatal
#Mental
services (coming 2020)!
These can, will and do save lives!
So much hard work but all worth it.
As a mum & campaigner this means the world.
#everyonesbusiness
There is NO HOMEWORK for us this whole week, people.
I cannot tell you the joy that brings this Monday afternoon, for both Reuben and I.
It's almost as if Christmas has come early 😂😂
#bestgiftever
Tomorrow begins
#MaternalMentalHealth
week.
There are so many things I wish I'd known when this photo was taken including:
- There is no blame or shame with struggling. And it doesn't mean you don't love your baby.
- There is help, support and hope.
- Recovery is possible.
Edwin Poots, Nolan Live:
"I don't believe you can fix or cure people of their sexuality".
Agree.
(I also add they absolutely DO NOT NEED a fix/cure.)
Then why on earth vote against
@BanConversionNI
Assembly motion and back the Amendment which removed that crucial line?
Heartbreaking tributes to Christopher in
@niassembly
.
Laura and his wee ones are heavy on my heart.
Powerful contributions from all political parties, united in grief.
Thank you all for reminding us that life is precious and politics/politicians are more than what many see.
Some days everything seems too much, as we navigate public and/or personal tragedies.
Those days, I have two simple mantras - one foot in front of the other and
#holdontohope
Right now, for me, that's a cup of tea and my medication.
To those also struggling
#YouAreNotAlone
Reuben overheard us chatting and me say just how weary and worn out we are after a very difficult 6 months.
He appeared at my side with this:
"It's hard, Mummy. But don't forget we can manage anything TOGETHER the 3 of us. Well, ok, 4 cos of Duke now."
That, folks, is my boy!
Go easy on yourself.
No really.
Go easy.
We've been living and breathing this pandemic for 18 months of hard going.
It's no wonder we are exhausted, frazzled and downright done in.
Unsurprisingly, running on fumes does that.
Take a moment.
Or take whatever you need.