Steph O✨
@PaleFacePioneer
Followers
160
Following
83
Media
264
Statuses
2,210
Friend of the God, Dreamer, Singer-songwriter, Adventurer, Artist, INFJ, married to the coolest @thedemetriuso ♥️
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Joined October 2015
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I met my abusers at an
@IHOPU
ministry fair. They were highly recommended. They talked the talk and convinced everyone they were genuine Christ followers. 1/
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138
Listened to a song on
@doddleoddle
new album and totally heard “Farting’s delicious; proved to be beneficial for mental health” instead of “Flirting’s” 😬😂🤷🏻♀️
#ifimbeinghonest
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@ihopkc
I see the same deception and two-face manipulation happening now in the current situation and it grieves me but I’m not shocked anymore. The roots were rotten already and the fruit is starting to show. 30/30
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0
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@ihopkc
I am thankful to have only endured the abuse for a month and a half but it did real damage. I am thankful that church leaders listened when a victim came forward. They did the responsible thing and kicked out the wolves. I am thankful that God isn’t blind to any of this 28/
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@ihopkc
Whenever I would share a concern about how leaders were handling things they would turn it on me and say I wasn’t doing Matthew 18 or submitting to leadership. They made me read “Culture of Honor” and “Tale of 3 Kings” to justify themselves 13/
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Posting irrelevant Bible verses while your church is dying is a different kind of ignorance, Isaac Bennett.
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@ihopkc
This family pleaded for some grace from the leaders to have less on their plate and were met with “maybe you’re not cut out for this if you need less work…” it was such an unChristlike response it shocked me and left me suspicious of what was really happening. 6/
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@EnneaforIdiots
Life as an enneagram 4:
Imagination Emotions
Magnifying VS Magnifying
Emotions Imagination
( •_•) (•_• )
( ง )ง ୧( ୧ )
/︶\ /︶\
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@ihopkc
I complied for a couple weeks out of genuine fear. I then called my pastor back home who was a counselor too. I told him everything and he told me to get out asap. He told me I was too valuable to be treated that way. 19/
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@ihopkc
This opened the floodgate of investigations about this couple and their ministry and treatment of people while supported & hosted at this church. I met with the pastor and told him my story. He believed me and wanted to look deeper into the ministry. 25/
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1
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I was a fresh grad from university with a heart on fire for God. I wanted to go out and make an impact on the world. I wanted to follow the dreams God placed on my heart as a teen. These people recognized it and like flies to honey flocked toward me. 2/
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@ihopkc
When our class began we were told the family were no longer with the ministry and we were not to speak to them. I grew even more suspicious and approached the family about what happened. This opened a huge can of worms… 7/
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One of the scariest things they said/ did was tell me I had a rebellious spirit and I needed to go through a program where I stayed in a redneck man’s basement in middle of nowhere Missouri to go through some discipleship. I told them they were insane & I wasn’t gonna do that.
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@ihopkc
They told me how they were mistreated by the leaders and it was heartbreaking. The next day a student snitched and the leaders rebuked me for talking to this family after being told not to. I didn’t regret it and I wasn’t going to stop digging. 8/
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@ihopkc
These leaders are still in ministry in Cyprus and living a luxurious life in a villa with other people’s money. Grifters and swindlers…27/
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@ihopkc
I soon became “prayer-partners” with the leader’s wife and she would use these times to find out my weaknesses, fears, etc and shame me/ used these against me later. I was told to be vulnerable and I was (unfortunately). 9/
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@ihopkc
I had a “spirit of rebellion,” I was the Absalom of the story, they were the innocent David. That’s how they painted the story for everyone in the church to see. I left every meeting crying and asking God why He made a mistake when He made me. 14/
1
0
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@ihopkc
After weeks of having my emotions exploited I approached the family that left the ministry. I share everything that was happening to me and they said “they chose you as their next victim. You need to be careful who you trust.” 15/
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@ihopkc
I was shocked and knew I didn’t want anyone else to fall victim to these abusers. I started to record meetings with my phone, write down unbiblical and abusive things they would say such as “We are here to lead not serve.” 17/
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@ihopkc
I dug deeper. I wasn’t the first victim but one in a string of hurting young, single women. Some who, after leaving the ministry, turned to drugs, sex, and suicide attempts just to mask the pain they were in. 16/
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@ihopkc
I came to them in the Matthew 18 way they wanted (even though this shouldn’t apply to abuse situations.) They wouldn’t listen but just used those mtgs to attack or disregard my concerns. They told me to keep my mouth shut about our meetings. 18/
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@ihopkc
I suffered not being believed by my friends back at ihop and I knew I couldn’t go back there long term. It would not be a place of healthy community, love, and healing that I needed after abuse.
#ibelievejanedoe
29/
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@ihopkc
The minute I got there I felt off in my spirit and physical body and wasn’t sure why. I was reprimanded for not joining the “team” for beers because I had a horrible stomach ache and wanted to stay home. 4/
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@ihopkc
This elder also happened to be a counselor and could tell I was off. He told me he would be a safe place if I wanted to share anything that happened. I was scared to open up to anyone in fear I would be called a liar again but I mustered up courage and told him everything 24/
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@ihopkc
When I spread the word to the other students I was met with disbelief and they told the leaders I was gossiping about them. I got sternly rebuked by the leaders in a private meeting and was told “not to cry” 21/
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@ihopkc
Each time of partnered prayer was coupled with rebukes of why I wasn’t a certain personality. Everyone in this school was a dominant extrovert and I was the polar opposite. I became their next target. I was told the way God created me was wrong… 11/
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Their names are Tom and Theresa Craig. I’m not certain they’re still in Cyprus. Here’s hoping they aren’t abusing anyone else anymore…
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@ihopkc
I warned the other students to get out before they became the victims and no one listened to me. Months later I heard that the church kicked the ministry out and a couple of students had fallen victim to the abuse. 26/
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@ihopkc
I used to be in a verbally abusive relationship and I recognized the manipulation and tactics of abuse right away with this woman. The narcissism was clear as day. I just couldn’t believe that it was in the church too. 10/
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This couple were formally
@ihopkc
staff and had made their own ministry in Pagosa Springs, CO at a small church in a small town. I was excited for all I would learn and do joining them. 3/
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@ihopkc
I stood my ground and told them they couldn’t force me to leave town because they weren’t my “leaders” anymore. They said I needed to find another place to stay. I stayed with an elder’s family from the church 23/
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@ihopkc
They decided they would kick me out of the school and I wasn’t allowed to stay at the student housing . They called me after I got home and told me to pack my bags and leave that night even though I had no way of getting home planned 22/
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I’m all for prayer and fasting but ihop calling a 7 day fast at the GPR seems like a tactic to get more bodies in the room. People should be able to pray anywhere (in their closets, in fact). Let us all pray for justice and for the truth to be exposed no matter the consequences.
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@ihopkc
We were going to go overseas on a trip together as part of the school but I was told that I had to “pray and ask God to change my personality and if it didn’t happen in the 2 weeks before the trip I couldn’t go (even though I had already raised the money and given it to them 12/
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@ihopkc
The spiritual and emotional abuse was just beginning. The first day of our “school” I witnessed an exchange between the leaders and a family who were in the ministry and sharing the house the students lived in. 5/
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@ihopkc
I started my plan of how this family and I would take down the ministry and expose their abuse. I wanted to do it in person because otherwise nothing would come of it. I talked to a few church members about it and their concerns were raised 20/
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Me at age 15. I had *just* given my life to Christ. Literally came out of Rob Zombie concert before this photo was taken. I remember feeling like I didn’t know who I was. Vulnerable. An easy target for a predator for sure. But thankfully God protected me from evil. 🥺
1
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@DavidFish7
Having been part of both KC and ATL recently I can’t tell you how much I cringe every time someone used “spiritual family” language. It was all talk and no action to back it up. I felt discarded by leadership after I left and I know I’m not the only one.
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The same day I tell my story here is the same day I suddenly fall ill out of nowhere. Haven’t puked like that in 2 years. I appreciate your prayers. The devil doesn’t like being exposed.
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This is why Matthew 18 will never work in an abusive situation. You’re putting the prey with the predator. My abusive ex used the same tactic of getting me “alone to talk.” It’s not safe.
@ihopkc
I came to them in the Matthew 18 way they wanted (even though this shouldn’t apply to abuse situations.) They wouldn’t listen but just used those mtgs to attack or disregard my concerns. They told me to keep my mouth shut about our meetings. 18/
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This need to be heard by all
#enneagram4
people.
@Enneagram4Facts
Feelings don't run the show. There is a reality deeper than our feelings. Live by that.
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Friends who have been disappointed, let down, trampled in the name of God: God isn’t done yet. Don’t get it twisted. God fulfills His destiny for you. Not a ministry, trip, person, program, etc…only God. Never do things just bcuz the leader says. Discern, pray, consult others.
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And sometimes I have kept my feelings to myself, because I could find no language to describe them in.” - Jane Austen
#relatable
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Back when I experienced church abuse, the leaders hammered Mt 18 into us yet when they had issues with me potentially sharing what was said behind closed doors they took everyone in the school in a room to talk about me and speculate…
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@Joannathelee
Yikes. I would hate if you were in Jane Doe’s place… until then you’ll never understand how it feels to be there and shouldn’t speak like this.
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@7MountainsInc
@bennettisaac
@ihopkc
There’s a pattern here. Stuart was the one saying these things before he left and now the next generation is regurgitating what they learned… it’s truly sad watching this play out.
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That’s real. We hold on to old wounds and suffering because we’ve made it a part of our identity and who we are. When we realize we are not what happened to us, that changes everything.
Today, notice if you are attached to having difficulties. Are you reluctant to let go of painful feelings, self-pity, and continual suffering? Can you be more balanced emotionally today?
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I woke up from an intense dream about a storm brewing. I saw people I knew from my old hop networks. In the dream my friends young daughter asked her mom, while having a vision, “What’s going on in a small town in Missouri?”
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Anonymous 4s all around shout: “THAT WAS ME”
Imagine all enneagram fours grew up knowing that everything they do is already a creative expression of their being?
Black nail polish and manic panic sales would plummet
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@EricVolz
“Wrongly under attack” “if there are victims” you’ve clearly proven that you are here for yourself and the money.
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@Enneagram4Facts
do 4s disassociate? I feel like when something bad happened in my life like someone I know dying or a relationship ending, I disassociate to soften the blow. It could be because I’m self-pres and wing 5 too 🤷🏻♀️
#enneagram4
4
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“The Body Keeps the Score” that book has taught me that victims often relive their trauma in their bodies several years after they’re removed from the abuse or trauma. I still have vivid flashbacks of being in the same room with my abuser (ptsd).
0
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We are married!! So thankful the Father brought my best friend
@TheDemetriusO
into my life ♥️🤗
0
1
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@blaiseforet
@Abednegolufile
Yes. It’s so concerning. When I tried to tell others about the abused I was experiencing, my peers wouldn’t hear of it. They thought it was gossip and hearsay. I was literally crying out for help and it was my own situation.
2
1
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@EricVolz
@rachaelannsteel
Will
@mistydedwards
write a statement and say why she left the ELT? The timing is peculiar…
0
0
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@albertr_us
@jude22_23
@benpanders0n
@EricVolz
the prophetic history must be deleted if Mike is truly separated from IHOP. This is a non-negotiable.
1
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I’m tired of people in the church using Gods name in vain…politics, SA, manipulative tactics. Stop. ✋ this isn’t what Jesus died for.
0
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One of the students even lied and said I went to her room every night to tell her “bad things” about the leaders. How she got that baffled me because as a very reserved person I would never disturb someone in their room to slander.
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It's been a whole month. A crazy quarantine month but we've survived it together.
#bestfriends
@TheDemetriusO
0
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Ladies, if he:
- lives life to the fullest
- loves summer and warm hugs
- is a great singer and dancer
- would melt for you
He IS your man. He's Olaf.
Tweet cred:
@TheDemetriusO
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1
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@gabriel_hancock
@jessie_thinker
@JacobsRacq6913
@ihopkc
@zackhensleyaz
I went to the GPR for 3 years and didn’t even know random people were allowed to lead prayer 😅 I was way too scared to even go up during rapid fire prayer. We need to stop giving power hungry predators the platform in church.
0
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@joshjrainwater
@HeavenBentPod
@judylthomas
@reachjulieroys
Whoever wrote this made it sound very “holier than thou.” 🤦🏻♀️
1
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@BrotherTodd
@Theresa_Hurley_
I fainted at my workplace during gbf once and had to go to the ER for severe dehydration. The medics said if they didn’t take me to the hospital I was about to go into a coma. I still have a scar from hitting my head while falling.
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@LennyLaGuardia
“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing."
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@starcazm
I’m just stunned by this and the fact that I was told by a leader in Atlanta that I was being “overly emotional” when I cried about something that another leader told me. 1/
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We are seeing this verse come to life in the church: “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap.” Galatians 6:7
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"The Lion drew a deep breath, stooped its head even lower and gave him a Lion’s kiss. And at once Digory felt that new strength and courage had gone into him."
@TheDemetriusO
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Am I the only
#enneagram4
that wants a birthday celebration but also hates birthday celebrations?
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@EnneaforIdiots
Me: 4w5
Him: 7w6 👍🏼 adventure, travel, food, passion
👎🏼planning (I like to plan, he doesn’t), I’m emotional and want depth but he wants lighthearted/ fun usually, he thinks everything is a joke, I’m more melancholy/ serious and think there’s an appropriate time for jokes
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@IamToddBentley
I can’t hear you over the injustice crying out from innocent children and women that were abused by “Christian leaders.”
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This guy loves me through the ups and downs. I always tell him this but he’s got one of the biggest & most loving hearts I’ve ever known and I don’t take that for granted. He pursues me so well. I feel blessed that I have someone like
@TheDemetriusO
in my life. ❤️
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After this meeting that I was excluded from the leaders told everyone to go home and pulled me into the room with the other 2 female leaders and brought the false accusations to me. This is where I was told “not to cry.”
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@Rbailey_99
@blaiseforet
@DavidFish7
@DunningAwen
@gabriel_hancock
@jessie_thinker
@JacobsRacq6913
@ihopkc
Yes everyone sang like Laura and taught like Mike. It was really strange. Like no one had a unique personality anymore 😫
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@blaiseforet
“Not intimidating because she’s a small woman” they obviously have never met Latinas 😤
1
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4
@ACInvestigator
@Akajohnssmith
@peace_got
And this is why when I tried to go to them I was shut down immediately. It wasn’t until I threatened to expose them to law enforcement about taking my money but kicking me out of the school did they start to listen. But I still took an elder and a pastor to share my story.
1
1
5
Yesterday I was sad and my bf didn’t want me to be sad so he asked me what would help me feel better and I said “tacos” and he tells me to open my cashapp 😭♥️ I love this guy.
@TheDemetriusO
0
0
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When I get home, if I’m home alone, I finally am able to release my emotions fully. It’s like all my physical and emotional energy is spent while crying and I can’t do much else. Recovery time is slow and not easy.
#enneagram4
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@JeremyJamesWhit
”“To what should I compare this generation? It’s like children sitting in the marketplaces who call out to other children: We played the flute for you, but you didn’t dance; we sang a lament, but you didn’t mourn!“ Matthew 11:16-17
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@johnmarkallen
@Joannathelee
I was talking about the fasting. Jesus told us not to announce when and how we fast.
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I was walking in this dark night scene with the wind and rain picking up and I sensed the fear of the Lord. His judgment was the storm coming.
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“This is my boast
I am not strong
This is the gift that I give.
I built you an altar
out of the ruins
of this broken life that I live.” Kevin Prosch 😭
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What some people want to call “gloating” is only a sigh of relief. For victims of spiritual abuse, it feels like they can finally breathe for the first time in a long time.
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