The_Narc_Decoder
@NarcDecoder
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Survivor of #narcissistic abuse. Trying to recover and staying focused 🌟 💕 Healing is a lonely journey, let's heal together 🙏🏽 🫂 #empath #emotionalabuse
London, England
Joined April 2022
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Nobody talks about the angry stage of healing. The rage you feel when you realise how much and how long you were taken advantage of. The absolute disgust you feel towards the narcissist that harmed, misled, took advantage, and abused you!
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People with the biggest hearts attract the most draining, disloyal, disrespectful, and difficult people!
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Just In Case Somebody Needs To Hear This:
DONT BE AFRAID TO LEAVE THAT NARCISSIST AND START OVER 💯
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The neurological damage of betrayal can cause early onset dementia, memory loss, symptoms of severe PTSD, psychosis, and permanent nerve damage.
Anyone with a soul knows betrayal is the lowest form of human behaviour.
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When you are no longer friends with someone. Please RESPECT the secrets they shared with you.
It's called INTEGRITY
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When you eventually see the
#narcissist
for what they really are, you'll have all the closure you need. You'll see a selfish, immature, controlling, passive aggressive, arrogant, manipulative, hateful, critical, apathetic, insensitive, callous excuse of a human being. Need I go
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Someone who uses your anger against you when your anger is justified due to their abuse is a person who is manipulative to their core. Beware of those who use your reactive outbursts against you. They will try to blackmail/gaslight you into believing that you're the true abuser.
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there are people out there right now who actively go around destroying other people's lives just to go on with theirs like nothing ever happened. 🤢 🤢 🤢 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
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I got betrayed, gaslighted, lied, disrespected, while my heart and my intentions were always genuine and pure.
I will never forget that 💔
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Cutting people off and letting them live with whatever delusional story suits them best is called top tier maturity.
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Narcissistic abuse is not just that someone dumped you or who you had a little tiff with them. NA is psychological abuse and brainwashing using intermittent reward and punishment, coercive control and withholding normal empathetic, emotional reactions to lower your self esteem.
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Your body rejects those who you are not meant to spend time with! All you have to do is listen. Do you feel uneasy? Do you feel safe? Your aura picks up on energies faster than your logical mind. Listen👂✨️
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When you cut off a
#Narcissist
from your life, they will never tell people the full story. They will only tell them the part that makes you look mad and crazy and themselves the pinnacle of innocence.
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You can still make a beautiful life for yourself even if you lost many years of it to trauma and abuse.
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Narcissists only surround themselves with people who enable their behaviour, ignore their behaviour, or encourage their behaviour. Anyone who tries to hold them accountable will be accused and blamed of the exact things the narcissist is guilty of.
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The narcissist will train you not to ask for anything. Every time you need something from them, it becomes a big deal, it's an ordeal, it's a drama! They make sure purposesly that you learn you, can't rely on them!
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Narcissists confuse and insult you. Drive you insane and tell you you're crazy. Provoke and harass and then shame you for getting angry. Thry create all these scenarios to convince you that something is wrong with you, when the only thing wrong with you is being with them!
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A trauma bond is suppose to be just as hard as drug addiction. I'm in my work toilets. My mouth feels dry and my chest hurts I feel like my whole body is burning up. I've reversed 2 years of healing in 1 weekend. I pulled the scabs off the wounds and now I'm bleeding.
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If someone is willing to walk away from you without a conversation,
If someone is fine with hurting you and never giving a real apology,
If someone believed what they wanted to believe,
If someone doesn't value your words,
You don't owe this person anything except your SILENCE
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When a Narcissists discards you. Pray for the discard 2 be permanent. It's the biggest blessing in disguise. It means they understand that U know who they really are! The mask was too exhausting 2 hide. They left because they needed a easier target, not cause U wasn't good enough
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The worst pain is having no contact with the person you're still in love with, who, at one point of time, sent you texts that would make your heart melt. And now, you can only love them in silence from a distance. Slowly being forced to close this chapter to rebuild your life.
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Cutting ties with someone who takes advantage of you and shows no concern for your well being is far less agonising than wasting more time attempting to make them value what they already disregarded. A fresh start is always possible, no matter how late it may seem 💓
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Narcissists don't lack empathy they lack compassion, remorse, and humanity. Using cognitive empathy, the abuser is able to seek out and target individuals with highly compassionate, loving, and caring empathetic traits.
#narcissisticabuse
#empath
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When their words do not match their actions, they are manipulating you.
Not being held accountable for the manipulation is how they gaslight you!
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I always thought that if I communicated enough, there would be change. But that's not the case. You can communicate until you run out of breath, but if there's no comprehension, your words are useless.
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A note to anyone who needs to hear it: We don't "get over" or "move on" from our trauma. We are forced to make space for it. We carry it. We learn to live with it. And, sometimes, we thrive in spite of it.
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Recovering from a Narcissistic relationship is hard! I've had many good days where I've truly thought this relationship is behind me. But then there are the days when I get triggered. A place we used 2 go to. Music we used 2 listen to & your brain makes U think you want them back
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Most of your enemies you have in your life started off as people you helped out in their life. Let that sink in!
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🚩🚩🚩Red flags aren't always about the other person. When you start lying to yourself about who they are so that you don't have to face losing them, that's the flag to pay attention to.
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A narcs manipulation is executed with such precision that the victim remains oblivious to their own victimhood until it's too late. The narcissists skillfully conceal their actions from the public, leaving the victim as the sole individual who recognizes their own victimization.
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I've been torturing myself with finding out things I should have never known! Now I totally regret it. I'm sitting here in tears with more of a shattered heart than I think I already had. I don't know why I've done this to myself.
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When a narcissist can't get what they want from you. They will cut you off, spread lies about you, and recruit others to hate you!
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Toxicity is nothing to play around with as relationships with narcissists are deadly . You are literally playing with life or death with someone who intentionally causes you pain. You might not physically die, but the narcissist will spiritually & emotionally kill you if you stay
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I was the girl who was there during his no job, no money, no princess treatment, his breakdowns, family problems, and I know I could have left and be -with whoever I wanted but I stayed because I believe in us and still got completely destroyed
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When a narcissist takes on the role of a victim, they blame people for problems they've caused, manipulating others for sympathy and attention.
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Narcissists have an inflated sense of importance & seek admiration &attention from others.They manipulate & charm those around them, while masking their true intentions. Caught in the reflection of their own ego, they dance through life without a hint of remorse or accountability
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I have attachment issues so instead of the "I'll leave before you leave me mindset it's"I'll stay until I hate you". I will forgive u until eventually I can't stand you anymore because I physically can't leave whilst I'm attached. Once I do tho ur never getting that love again
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Narcissists will try to make you look crazy to others when you refuse to be blamed, gaslighted, and manipulated by them.
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Don't let people think you can't live without them.Remind them there was a time you didn't know them and you were doing just fine.
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I've reached a point in my life where I can't be hurt anymore. But the scars of disappointment & pain still linger. I've felt every ounce of sadness & it's become a part of who I am. I'm tired of the hurt, but I keep pushing forward with the 1 goal to make myself happy everyday!
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The person you see at the end of a relationship with a Narcissists is who they were along. Mine did so well at hiding his demonic side I literally felt like I was going 2 die of heart failure when he took the mask off. He was the complete opposite of who he protrayed himself 2 be
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I saved his reputation by not telling my side of the story. I've learnt it's best to stay quiet during the storm. Holding someone's secrets even when they've done u wrong shows your good character & integrity. Bad people destroy themselves in the process of trying to destroy you
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Disappear completely from the narcissist for the rest of your life, no exceptions. Erase the illusion you loved from your mind by fully accepting that your ex was a very sick creature, and the person you love/d was not a real person who really existed. Move on with your life!
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You’re better off sleeping alone than waking up next to someone who shouldn’t even be in your home!
Don't allow loneliness to make you lower your standards of the people that have access to you and your energy. Make your lonely days the most enlightening days you’ll ever have.
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I forgot how to be happy!I had spent the last few years surviving the truama & sadness of what I had been through. I took a break of social media to relearn myself. I actually liked the person I was before I met the Narcissist & I had to give myself time to find that person again
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Delete conversations that hurt You whenever you read them. Delete phone numbers. Block contacts. Restrict. Mute. Unfollow. Remove Negative energy from your life. Do whatever it is that you need to do in order to heal and create a positive environment for yourself.
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A relationship with a narcissist if it last for too long will leave you with mental health conditions you didn't suffer before meeting them.
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You shouldn't have to explain why you deserve to be spoken to with respect and treated with human decency. Do not allow anyone, even if it's someone you love, to talk down to you, hurt you, or strip you of who you are in order to gain power over you. That isn't love. It's control
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As you grow, you learn that not everyone you love will love you in return. You realise that the people you support won't always support you. Then, you begin to accept that maturity entails losses and that growth is the revelation of the truth, eventually, everything changes.
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Coming out of a relationship that was emotional abusive left me with anxiety and PTSD. The hardest journey I've been on is learning to re love myself again. Now that I've started dating again I will never be afraid to set high standards for myself or create healthy boundaries.
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I use to wonder why people who were in emotionally abusive relationships didn't just leave! I use to b the person that would say it would never happen to me until I was tricked into one by a Narcissist. Emotional abuse I went through left me suicidal & in a consistent toxic loop.
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Once you stop checking up on the Narcissist & finally get on with your life. The social media post they put out to subconsciously hurt you. The ones they know your watching. Yep they feel your presence gone. Let them feel like a person performing in a concert to empty seats!
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Sometimes, the narcissist won't leave you directly.
Instead
They will treat you like shit until you leave them & then they blame you!
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The first step to healing is acceptance. Accept the true colors the narcissist has shown you, no matter who you thought they were or how they used to act
Stop romanticising people who are hurting you! Repeated mistakes aren't accidents. That's their behaviour, thats who they are
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Narcissists don't operate like normal people. They’re motives are always led for self-serving purposes, the authentic self is hideous, and various masks are adopted to hide it.
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You attract damaged people when you have a healing spirit.
Be careful with that!
Darkness is drawn to your light.
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Merry Christmas to all of us who have endured
#narcissist
#abuse
and survived, to those currently healing & those still to realise that we can live without them, as we did before them!
Keep positive!
🙏🏾 ❤️
#narcissists
#empath
#MerryChristmasToAll
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#Narcissistic
people are natural takers. They will take your money, your life, your sanity and ruin any relationships you have with family and friends. They look for
#Empaths
because we are natural givers. They will take everything off an Empath and will never show any remorse.
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Never forget how they disrespected you in order to make someone else comfortable.
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I explained my hurt and still got hurt, so I learned to stop talking 😔
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A narcissist will come in your life and try to test you to see if you love them more than you love yourself.
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A narcissist will stand there and watch you cry over the pain they have caused you with a glint in their eye, a smirk on their face, no remorse, no apology, and they will keep winding you up and blaming you for the pain they're causing you.
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Don't ever feel stupid for loving someone who turned out to be everything they promised they would never be. But be proud that you still believe in the goodness of people, because that is rare. Don't let it harden you. Learn the lesson, but keep that soft heart.
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I heard someone say that if you isolate yourself during difficult times, it might be because, as a child, you were left alone to handle your emotions on your own. I felt that 😢
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I don't think I realised how terrible I was treated until I tried explaining it to someone else. I'm only putting myself in environments and around people who bring out the softness and the best of my character and not people or situations that have me in survival mode any more.
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The narcissist will lie to you, and then they will lie about you!
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@JonRhodesUK
You can never have a fulfilling life with a narcissist in your life. They will suck you dry until you have nothing left to give. The only option is to leave and start over no matter how long you were with them. You only have one life!
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Before you get into the next relationship, take the break and heal. Don't be the traumatized person trying to enter into a relationship, hoping it'll be the solution to your problems. Take the break and heal 🫂 ❤️
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One day, you will tell people how you pulled yourself out of the ocean when you couldn't even swim. Don't you dare give up on yourself.
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@TraumaInformd
I started counselling, which helped me to address my own issues first and how it was impacting my decision-making while being in a toxic relationship. I started to do things for myself, putting myself first. I think when ur healing, it's important 2 not concentrate on revenge
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I swear narcissist have a 6th sense when it comes to their victims. The minute you forget about them & life is going great, they find away if not directly or by other people to throw you off track. I struggle most with the betrayal because loyalty is one of my strongest traits 😔
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U can't sit down with narcissists &have an honest convo cause their entire way of being is about manipulation,half truths &lies. It's a way of life, and anyone on the receiving end of repeated narc abuse will encounter emotional, psychological damage on a level never known before
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The
#narcissist
wants everything you have, and be everything you are! They picked you because they recognised your power not because they don't see it!
#mentalhealth
#Narcissist
#empath
#DoYou_RM
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I want you to know that it's okay if you thought you were over it, but it hits you all over again.
It's okay to fall apart even after you thought you had it under control.
You are not weak.
Healing is messy.
There is no timeline for healing 🫂 ✨️
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My life got better when I realised I didn't have to be nice. Nice got me run over, stressed out, and disrespected.
I'm not nice. I'm a good person. There's a difference!
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Did that person you love unconditionally teach you to never love like that again?
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Looking at the comments so many of us have been through the same thing, and that makes me sad. I can only pray that we all make it and heal from our negative experiences. Meeting these sorts of people in life will really change how you preserve the world and the people in it.
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Unconditional love without boundaries is self-destruction. Just because you love them doesn't mean you should accept disrespect and be treated like a doormat. You gotta train your no to be stronger than your empathy. The bigger your heart is, the stronger the boundaries you need.
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The person I trusted & loved the most, was the person who ended up betraying me, violated, disrespected, manipulated & lied on me in the worst ways possible. People I don't know have been set up against me. The aftermath of a narc relationship. Trauma feels at times, never ending
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Narcissists never have to heal when they leave a relationship because they feel nothing! They move on quickly to the next supply to regulate their own self-esteem. The narc is emotionally immature. Most narcs suffer from an emotional growth stunt where they are stuck at 7yrs old.
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Narcissists seem loyal to their families, not cause of love, but because those family members feed their delusions of greatness & blindly enable them. They R loyal 2 one another because narcissism is a team sport. The Narc will defend & be loyal to those who don't correct them
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@RandazzleEnriq2
Yes, I agree. But once you encounter true betrayal, that catches you completely off guard. Trust me, you will never look at things the same way 😔
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I've had the longest, hardest day at work. I've come home, finally got time to sit on my phone. I want to bust into tears I'm overwhelmed by every1 who messaged me & took the time to comment on my recent tweets. I appreciate all your advice and support. Thank you 🙏🏽💖 🤗
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What you went through with your
#narcissist
may have broken your heart. But it opened your eyes. Take that as the win!
#tuesdayvibe
#narcissist
#empath
#narcfree
#nocontact
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When you realise everyone is a projection of how they feel internally, you take a whole lot less to heart.
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after certain things happen, you don't feel the same way about people,
no matter who they are.
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All
#Narcissist
have flying monkeys who get caught up in a narcissist's plan — often to damage the other person. In my case it was his mother! You gotta know the difference between support and surveillance.
#empath
#Narcissistabuse
#FlyingMonkeys
#MentalHealthAwarenessWeek
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The narcissist feels most alive and happy when they can take you out of character. That's when they start recording you and telling the people they have been slandering you to;
"Look, I told you she was like that!"
Don't give them the opportunity to thrive on your unhappiness.
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I remember my X
#narcissist
ghosted me 2 years ago while undergoing radiotherapy. Today I thank God for removing that person from life.There’s no doubt in my mind that I would be living a much more diminished life,if his actions, as cruel as they were,hadn’t forced me to wake up
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When I met the narcissist during the love bombing stage, I disclosed a traumatic time of my life years ago. When the narcissist discarded me, he opened every wound I thought I healed & then left me for dead! After a 4 year relationship, he just disappeared like we never existed.
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A NARCISSIST will never forgive you for what they did to you!
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Things everyone (aka me) needs to come to terms with.
• No response is a response.
• If they wanted to, they would.
Timing will not always be in your favor.
• Not everyone has the same heart as you.
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If you hadn't found out, they probably would have kept lying. Remember that!
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